Leafy I don't disagree with you. There is a sameness to many homes in the blog world, and there seems to be a linking that kind of leads you in circles from one blogger to another, over and over - especially among those bloggers getting press in print and guest appearances (or pilot offers) on various shows. This may sound crazy, but there's something about it that feels a bit incestuous to me - on an internet blog level, of course!!! Of the homes featured in your link, they are cute and as you said, quirky in a similar manner that is very defined and predictable - and they have a 'vibe' that reads 'young mommy' to me. It fits that phase of life and general age bracket but I'm not there anymore. There's a little *cute* in my decor and a hit of *quirky* here and there, but not much of either - everything loses impact if it's overused. My husband would walk on eggshells in those homes and probably spend a lot of time in the garage or basement!

All that said...... I'm getting some popcorn because this could get interesting!

I'll eat the first handful of popcorn -- to get rid of the treacly taste of those stories!

You know, when I looked back at the homes that link led to, I'm not sure they are great examples--I looked at about 20 homes on the site and maybe didn't link to the ones that best typified what I'm talking about.

Yes, part of it is surely that they are in the little-kid years. I had toys in my living room when I had three kids 5 and under, too. Oh, those were the days!I wish I could go back to when my children's biggest problems could be cured with a cookie and a hug.

Here's another link that maybe leads to a better example of what I was talking about. I can't see my husband anywhere in this room. I think it would be fun (if I had a magic wand) to do up our living room like this and just see if he would notice/say anything/just go sit in another room all the time, or what!

Here is a link that might be useful: Better Example

Sorry, not an exciting response... popcorn munchers may want to skip over this post.

One thing I could imagine someone saying about "who are the men who live there" is that there are no big sleepable couches with feet-ready coffee tables.

I don't know whether people just say that for effect or whether it is in fact true that men lay around on couches -- my own DH does not do that.

Your question about entertaining space is also thought provoking. Every I see a house for sale the talk is always about how great it is for entertaining. Yet having a friend over is so different from having a baby shower is so different from a sit-down dinner with business associates is different from a New Year's Eve with college friends. A space might be great for one of those things, but is the same space good for all? My mother's idea of a great space for entertaining is a free social hall with kitchen in the apartment complex -- she expresses herself very freely, but not via decor.

There is a certain fluffiness to many bloggers' homes. I also attribute some of it to most being in their child-raising years. There's also a feeling of the rooms being too studied. My DH would be very uncomfortable living in those rooms. But so would I, not even counting the upkeep. How DO they find the time to dust all that clutter?

I tend to decorate with a more masculine bent, with leather and dark wood and no florals. I think, over the years, we've kind of reached an unspoken agreement that I could do whatever I wanted as long as he could also feel as if our home reflected him. But, maybe if the bloggers are making money, their husbands don't care!
Dee

Now, I am a fan of whimsy and fun decor, but that last link...made me feel a little seasick. Yeah, I can't see my DH there either (me either for that matter!). The very first one, ok, yeah, I guess he wouldn't bark too much, but as it went on, well, it definitely didn't fit what I'd consider our lifestyle.

The 3rd one in the first link reminded me of my DD's home, right after they got married. Very young, very suburban-hip, just starting out style, it didn't have that collected over time look, just more of a thrift store look. She's recently redecorated and it's now a more urbane young adult look. The ones in the blogs posted seem to be Pinterest/Etsy style and very feminine.

Maybe it is a generational thing? My home is furnished primarily with 2nd hand furnishings, but over time, I've found more traditional/classic pieces and it just feels differently than those posted in the blogs. I don't think my house feels 'forced' and that is the vibe I get from those homes.

But yeah, I can't imagine the men who live there. Definitely not middle aged men!

Glad you posted the "better example" link, as the first pics of decor actually appeared rather masculine-looking to me.

The colors wouldn't bother my dh, as he currently lives with a pink living room and sofa, so all that aqua would seem positively macho. He would, however, have a hard time with all the stuff floating around, as would I.

Ugh...clutter central! I would feel jumpy and anxious with all that around me, even if much of it is cute/charming/whimsical.

Jamies, I have never heard or read anyone speak of the "entertaining" issue the way you did, but imo, you are SO correct! Great points. No house is ideal for every scenario you mentioned. Why don't we hear about that? Don't you get tired of all the House Hunters chirping about how every house they look at either is or isn't good for entertaining? Not that simple is it?

Whew, that's a lot of stuff and defintely very feminine. Most of the spaces are small, so I don't know if there's a man-cave or not. Probably no.

We've got a small house, too, so entertaining often and having larger parties is just not something we do since we don't have the space (and I work long hours). The most we've ever had here was 15 before a football game, and then more typically, we will have 6 of us before we go out for a concert.

It's definitely a challenge when you have a smaller home, you have small children, are maybe paying student loans, etc.

These appear to be a series of blogs that are connected by a unifying idea and purpose, not exactly incestuous, but definitely united. I clicked around the links and the similarity is not merely to decorating style, but even more, to faith and small children. Those are the important elements in these women's lives. On the left-hand side of almost every page is a link to the Joyful Life Library Project. This is a project that supplies books and toys to children's wards and pediatric ICUs in hospitals. A couple of the women have stories of tragedy and near-tragedy with their children.

Looking at the similarity of design and the faith items desplayed, I wonder if there isn't a Christian denomination as the motivator - perhaps the LDS church, or another church that also accents home and family and woman-as-homemaker. IMO this type of design isn't about to take over American decorating - from reading this forum it certainly seems as though the style of, e.g., Cote de Texas, is far more popular!

I would get pretty nervous with all that color around, and DH would look very funny tromping through those rooms in his jeans and flannel shirts and clompy shoes. Although - his favorite room in our home to read in is our guest bedroom - and it's all yellow and pink and floral and filled with nostalgia from both our mothers, and he says "It's homey".

I did love the craft rooms and one boy's bedroom with yellow walls. And loved the art work, so creative and pretty and hung in beautiful frames and patterns.

Just glancing around at the photos and while I like to look at them...I don't think I would be happy living in any of those homes. I have two young children and love fun fabric and colors (for the kids and their space), but not in my own bedroom or public spaces. Probably because I tend to go for a more masculine style with warmer tones and big comfy furniture. We've got to have the foot rest coffee table and a sofa to nap on...which we all do.

Speaking of the men in these homes...I refuse to over feminize my bedroom because I think a man wouldn't love to sleep in a really feminine room. Funny that when we had to sleep in our guest room that I did in pink florals, pink chenille and girly green walls my DH said he loved that room and could sleep there all the time!!! He also LOVES tiny china tea cups and saucers (think fancy English) and wants to start collecting them for his tea and coffee. This is a man with scary tattoos on both arms, a military haircut and loves to rock out with Black Sabbath on his guitar. He thinks "man caves" are stupid and loves hanging out with the whole family. SO, I don't know...he might be just fine in one of those homes even though he DID have a hand in the decor direction of our own home.

Also, I have to believe those photos are enhanced to some degree. They are visually striking in saturation and contrast...probably not quite true to reality. Hey, I'll photoshop myself a bit too so I'm knocking them for any enhancement...just something to consider when piddling out in blogland.

Yikes. Yeah, the house in that second link has a 'forced' feel to me - Pesky hit that on the head. My DH would never have been comfortable in a setting like that, pre-kids, with young kids or empty nest. Nor would I. But I don't want to slam someone for their decor choices just because they differ from mine. It's that chocolate/vanilla thing.

Leafy, you are not alone - this is where MY fuddy duddiness comes out and probably that popcorn!! Making a home business out of blogging/decorating is not the same *in my opinion*, as decorating a home for real life, whatever phase of that real life you are in. It has not about color or design/style preferences - it's about a staged/forced atmosphere (camera ready at all times??) vs LIVING in a space, designed to please your eye but also displaying evidence of day to day life. I appreciate bloggers who love to share their creativity with picture perfect rooms in one post and are willing to show it with dirty socks, empty pop cans and crumbs on the floor in another.

There are certain aspect of this stuff I like, but he examples are the extreme versions of the style.

I think of this style as the "New Country." Remember the geese with aprons and hats? Blue and white checked curtains? Wooden hearts painted in mauve and strung on twine and hung above the doorway? It is almost the same thing, but modernized.

The last art style reprise was craftsman, more of a masculine look, now the feminine side has taken over again. If I remember my childhood correctly, the style before the last country explosion was a more masculine style. Dark woods, sleek furniture, shag carpet...

Different strokes. These girls' style looks to me like a reprise of 60s-70s low-budget eclectic, only in an extra-femme-stay-home-housewife version instead of hippy earth tones. That was my own young-mom look, and I can appreciate that this cute version is still fun, creative, family-friendly, costs a lot more energy than money, and happily turns its back on the design industry's currently dictated look--the last extra pleasing to me. Not a monthly payment or grossly overpriced showroom sofa in sight, although I suspect the 2011 Color of the Year is in there somewhere (whatever it is). A lot to like, really. For those not pleased with the color choices, it could always be played out in Pottery Barn colors, although I'm afraid no version would fly well here in rural Georgia, which some may be pleased to know is much more HD Forum.

I respect your right to your opinion, but I don't share it.

First, millions of women live without men. Why shouldn't their decorating be feminine?

Second, many men are apparently secure enough in their own masculinity that they just don't mind. In my last home I made my living room quite feminine, including roses on the wallpaper, and many of my male friends went out of their way to tell me they really liked it.

Third, our idea that all decor should look masculine is a very recent one. Look back in history and if there was enough money to live above the primitive style, the decor was decidedly feminine. Think of Victorian, Art Nouveau, the wonderful floral barkcloth curtains of the '40s, and King Louie the whatevereth.

To me, it's the more modern decor that so often looks very "little boxes made of ticky-tacky, and they all look just the same." I've had a problem collecting kitchen pictures for the gallery as almost all of them are white, white, white -- and how many ways can you see "white kitchen with granite counters" and still be fascinated? Another boxy beige couch? Yawn.

Count me as someone who loves to see decor that has a feminine touch. I am a bit shocked at how masculine much of the modern decor has become.

I don't think we need to drench men in all-pink ruffled bedrooms full of cherubs. But I do have a dear friend with a pink living room and dining room, and her husband told me he really likes it. Pink is a very comfortable color to live in. In fact, her home was designed and decorated originally by another friend of mine, a male artist who is married (to a woman) with kids. The place is really spectacular and sold for a bundle.

Seriously, if your home leans more to the masculine than the feminine, you might want to ask yourself why. Why can't both the masculine AND the feminine be celebrated in our homes? Why should we women have to suppress our softer sides to make our decor cater to men all the time?

Would Brad Pitt, or Mel Gibson, or Gerard Butler really look feminine to you if you saw them in this room?

That room doesn't appeal to me except for the windows. No idea who Gerard Butler is. Mel Gibson is a homophobic, anti-semetic, misogynist. I seriously doubt you'd find him in that bed.

Oceana, my DH would probably be right at home in that room with a few minor changes. I personally gravitate towards more earthy, masculine colors. It's not so much because I'm decorating around my man, but because that's what I personally like. I did have the notion not to be too feminine (for us both) in our MB, but was completely taken aback by my DH's love of the our shabby chic guest room. Anyway, I absolutely love antiques, botanicals, toile and lots of warm color. I like to live in a house with an old fashioned library feel and not so much one with a Victorian tea room vibe (which I very much like to visit and look at). This would be my decor with or without a man : ) .

Speaking of pink...many shades are very appealing and can be quite soothing. I'd love to see some rooms that combine pink and masculine features!!

Oh, and Gerard Butler would love LUV-O-LY in that bed.

Natal--happy to see I'm not the only one who wouldn't want to find Mel Gibson in that bed (or any other!).Unless it was a bed of nails. With fire ants. But I digress....

Jamies-- I like your point about entertaining, and you're right--there are so many different kinds of hosting and no setting is right for all of them.

dlm2000-- Good point about the difference between staging a home for blog photos and actually living in it. Maybe when they aren't taking pics for the blog, they don't keep quite so much stuff on display.

rosie--low budget eclectic is how I would categorize my own home, so believe me that it's not the absence of big-ticket items in these homes that made me pause.I am a huge fan of the "not a monthly payment in sight" look! I guess it's what you call the "extra-femme" slant to it that made me take notice and wonder what their DHs thought about it all.

And the oh-so whimsical touches--I can hear my husband now "Honey, why are you burning candles in a gerbil cage on the piano?"

Oceanna--no reason at all that people (male or female) shouldn't make their houses just as femme as they like. I'm not tsk-tsking the bloggers, just wondering what their husbands' take on the decor is and whether it suits them, visually.

I actually think the super-youthfulness of the decor, as much as the girlyness, is the biggest difference between the styles shown on the blog and the homes that my friends and I had when we were just starting out in married life. I remember Victoria magazine and some of the very feminine homes of some of my friends with rooms that looked more like a Victoria's Secret than anything else--those rooms were femme but not at all childlike. I suppose the appearance of men in those rooms was more like they were visitors to a boudoir rather than a nursery school ;-)

Aren't a lot of these homes also home-schools? I don't see "feminine" as much as I see "classroom bulletin board" look and "corridor art display" - especially in all those penants hanging around, and the maps. But most grammar school teachers are women, so it wouldn't surpise me if kindergaten chic had a girly inclination.

Hmmm...when I think of Gerard Butler, I think of him in that gladiator movie, and noooo...couldn't see him in that room! haha. But seriously, I know my DH would HATE that room, it's way over the top feminine for his taste (mine, too, frankly). My DH is very much a bull-in-a-china-shop kind of guy, who just is not comfortable in frou-frou. He is afraid he'd get it dirty or tear it, and he would, too!

Our home has a very feminine vibe to it, but not frilly. DH likes the soft lines of the furniture I've chosen, but is definitely not one who cares for fabrics...give him leather, corduoroy or -shudder- herculon and he's happy.

jamies--Yes, several of them mentioned homeschooling. We homeschooled for ten years and were in and out of lots of homeschoolers' houses, but (generational difference, perhaps) they weren't as child-centered and theme-y as the bloggers. Of course, the homeschoolers we knew weren't home decor bloggers, so it makes sense that their homes would be less theme-y.

The decor influence for young married women today is very different from when I was newly married in the mid-1960's. Now they follow cottage style blogs done by amateur decorators and then I bought home decor magazines which featured homes by qualified designers. Doesn't mean my home didn't have thrift store finds and DIY junk but I wouldn't have dreamed of using that abundance of quirky elements as most designers did not do that. Actually my homes then were more traditional and less whimsical than my current home. In the last 10 years (since I've followed blogs!) I've adopted a more eclectic/cottage/quirky style and my DH's only requests were that no frills or lace and no faux distressing on painted furniture but pink and florals were fine with him. I think masculine style may be more of a concern to some women than to most men.

I agree that there seems to be a unified checklist of "quirky" elements in this type of decor and I can relate as I've also used many of those elements as they are readily available in the 2nd hand venues of yard sales and thrift stores. However after seeing them so often on blogs the uniqueness decreases and I've stopped using many of those things. I also don't spend as much time looking at that type of blog.

I do think that often the decor of anyone who follows a certain style will tend to that sameness and even the more grown up styles often seen on forums such as this can have elements that are overdone. The challenge in decorating is to choose one's generic style and make it uniquely your own.

Thanks for the links leafy, I've enjoyed looking at many of them. The old school desks in one of the homes reminded me we also had those for our children in the 1970's!

I homeschool my two young kids, and I did convert my guestroom into our school/craft room. It's a pretty basic room that's pleasant to be in, but not over stimulating or like anything in these blogs. In fact, none of the homeschool homes I've been in have spaces that resemble those rooms. Guess none of these folks are home decor bloggers either.

Pesky, Gerard Butler would look in just about anything and he would make anything look good : ) .

DH just walked by and he said he didn't think oceana's room looked very cozy. Said it did look like a European hotel that he wouldn't mind visiting, but wouldn't want to live with it. He confuses me...

I love your post, Oceanna and that room. Any man I would would want would find the room elegant and inviting (it's a bed after all!)
And Gerard Butler is most definitely, like it or not, a meterosexual European who would be probably be comfortable in that room. ( Seen his recent hair highlights?)
However, unlike many of the blog pics, it's classically styled not femininely twee.

Ok, had no idea, so just googled Gerard Butler and this almost 60 year-old would be happy to decorate in any style he likes! ;)

LOL Cyn! Yup, Gerard is pretty easy on the eyes, isn't he?

Just asked my DH about the bedroom Oceanna posted. "Honey? On a purely hypothetical level, would you be comfortable if I redecorated our bedroom like this?"

His comment? "Cajun would never be able to jump up on the bed. We'd have to put the chair on the side instead of at the foot."

Shows what HIS priorities are! Once we turn out the lights his only concern is that the window shades or curtains block morning sun and that the dog can join us on the foot of the bed! Pink? Not likely he'd care.

Oh, I wish I had photoshop. I'd take those blog photos and put Gerard Butler, Daniel Sunjata, Liam Neeson, and a 24 year old Robert Plant in them, and voila! I'd want to live there.

Don't forget Javier Bardem!

Okay, I had play. My DH's response to my happy "desire" to copy Oceanna's bedroom was a long silence, and then "Are you kidding?" Is it too feminine, I ask? "...overwhelmingly feminine." Surprised me actually. Apparently he's getting more possessive about our decor, because there's a fair amount of feminine stuff about here anyway.

Oceanna's point about the masculinization of our homes is a good one. Maybe just a natural offshoot of advances in sexual equality, most particularly the fact that the lady's domain no longer is limited to caring for the home, decisions ceded by menfolk who get the wide world instead? Maybe we should see the second half of the 20th Century as an era in which men were empowered to choose upholstery.

BTW, I went back through the homes and discovered they apparently suffered the first time from a cumulative effect--most of the rooms don't strike me as extremely colorful or cute looked at individually. Not that any are to DH's newly voiced tastes, though. :)

>Maybe just a natural offshoot of advances in sexual equality, most particularly the fact that the lady's domain no longer is limited to caring for the home, decisions ceded by menfolk who get the wide world instead? Maybe we should see the second half of the 20th Century as an era in which men were empowered to choose upholstery.

It's just fashion. Look at what men wore up until Beau Brummel persuaded them to be drab. And mid-Victorian David Copperfield rejoices in his flowered carpets, leafy wallpaper, and rose colored furniture in his new cottage. As someone (sorry, can't remember who it was) pointed out, the real Mad Men went home to ruffled curtains an floral upholstery and didn't think twice about it.

I like looking at the linked homes. Very pretty, bright and just happy looking spaces. Not my style but still, I can appreciate them.

I showed DH the pic Oceanna presented and this is how it went:

ME: "Hey babe, what would you think if we changed or bedroom to look like this?"
HIM: "Can we keep the same mattress?"
ME: "You don't think it looks too feminine?"
HIM: "Nah, you gotta have some girly sh*t in the house."
ME: "I didn't know you felt that way."
HIM: "Sure, I'm a proud husband. It's the same way I don't mind buying tampons, I'm proud to have a sweet girl like you."

Oh boy, do I love the sh*t out of him.

This thread and the responses to Oceana's post reminded me of this piece I read some time ago. I like to think I find a balance and involve my spouse in our decorating decisions. I can't really see the guys living in the houses in the OP involved in the decision making. Definitely "her" house.

P.S. I think Garden Web needs to add a "like" button feature!

Here is a link that might be useful: Art of Manliness

Personally, I think that decorating leans too far towards the masculine, now.

For a good part of history, the wealthy often lived in much more feminine looking homes, while the man had at least one or two rooms for himself - usually an office and a library or a den. Now, guys still want the office and the man cave, yet we still decorate to suit their tastes.

How many times have I watched a program on HGTV where the man cave is in total control of the guy. Where is the woman's version of the man cave? Typically, that was the living room, I suppose.

For those unfamiliar with Gerard Butler, two of his more thoughtful movies that I liked a lot were Dear Frankie (watch it with the subtitles, the Scottish accents are thick) and Phantom of the Opera.
I'm looking forward to seeing Machine Gun Preacher.

BB, never heard of either. Even Googling didn't help.

I agree with most of the posts above.
And personally this type of decor is a bit too stimulating for my tastes...like a Montissori classroom.

My take is that this is urban country 2.0. These houses are bright, have a lot of contrast and visual clutter. It is an inexpensive style to do. And it is interesting and allows for creativity.

Here is also what I think is going on...

IMHO, true country living and its decor (that is, one lives in a farm and has land, animals, gardens, crops....) the barn, shop, and mechanical outbuildings are considered to be functional and unless its a garden shed or summer kitchen, the man's domain. No frills, flowers, etc. allowed. Bt the farmhouse though also a working kitchen and housekeeping space is considered to be a reflection of the woman of the house. So it is more expected to have whatever decor the woman would want, as a comfort against the hard work the family does, and to be house-proud and family-proud.

So the overall household would have a balance of masculine and feminine spaces.

Spot on, juliekcmo!

What struck me first was the text about loving the "stuff". I suppose you must love it to dust it!

My favorite Gerard Butler movie is P.S. I Love You. I have been inlove with him from the beginning!