Oh Goody! I'm so glad the packages are getting there and all of you are able to join in on my fun. We had a lot of wonderful participants for this swap and some interesting seeds coming through. It was truly all of you that made this swap a success. I hope the rest of players get their packages quickly so they too, can enjoy the spirit of halloween and the sharing of our beautiful gardens. I'll definately be back next year IF all of you promise to be back too! Until then, Im sure I'll be hanging around this thread until all of the packages have been delivered.... and of course to bless you with a few more of these! Why do vampires need mouthwash? They have bat breath... Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal? He heard it had great circulation... What is a Mummie's favorite type of music? Wrap!!!!! Why do demons and ghouls hang out together? Because demons are a ghouls best friend! Who was the most famous French skeleton? Napoleon bone-apart Which building does Dracula visit in New York? The Vampire State Building. What's it like to be kissed by a vampire? It's a pain in the neck. Where does a ghost go on vacation? Mali-boo.

I've watched and read this thread with interest. My mother was the victim of horrible abuse as a very small child at the hands of her father. It was physical and emotional. The emotional abuse continued until he died. My mother left me with my grandparents as an infant and lived on the other side of the country until I was 9. As she wasn't around I was unaware of the acrimony between my mother and grandfather. When she came for a visit the battles began anew with me a pawn in their war. When she moved back to the town we lived in it was all out war most of the time. As I grew older and she lived near by, she began to abuse me. Some of it was subtle and cruel mental/emotional abuse some of it was her venting her fury on me physically with several awful beatings in my teens. Mostly I was aware that I was a symbol of unhappiness for her and she unconsciously wanted to destroy me. And my grandfather never abused me, he expressed affection in his grumpy way. My grandmother told me he felt sorry for me because my mother didn't love me. So that didn't help my relationship with my mother either as you can imagine. She had another child, my half sister. She pushed me away even more and attempted to have me sent away to a juvenile prison. She nearly succeeded. Fast forward. I am an adult with small children of my own. A year of therapy in my late 20s helped me resolve a lot of the painful and conflicted emotions about my mother. The damage exists, though, and still effects my relationships. Therapy and self examination help me to be more aware and conscious of my reactions. That doesn't always keep them from happening, however. I put on my big girl pants and make no excuses. One night when she was visiting and the kids were asleep, she started talking about my grandfather and told me the full tale of the vicious abuse she received and his alcoholism. She had an infant sister that died of leukemia. My grandfather turned his grief and anger on my mother who was three at the time. All news to me including the alcoholism. He was a teetotaler by the time I arrived. I sat there horrified and transfixed. That I knew nothing of this from my grandmother was no surprise as she didn't ever discuss unpleasant family events, ever. (I didn't even know about the infant who died until I stumbled on a family photo of two babies when I was 13 or so, one was obviously my mother, one was not but looked like family. I asked about that baby and my grandmother told me she had died.) How much was true? I will never know. I know my mother reinterprets events to suit her own needs. So I have to consider that. But she thinks it's true. Right then and there I forgave her all the pain I had suffered. Have I forgotten? No. And I keep both myself and my children shielded from her and have little but cursory and cordial contact. She plays obvious favorites with her grandchildren. My sister's kids get lots more attention and regular gifts. My kids understand that Nana J isn't a warm normal grandmother. But out of sight out of mind. Not perfect but not painful, either. I won't comment on your relationships, Tricia, as all families are unique. I'm simply sharing my own story of the multi-generational ripple effects of familial abuse.

One tip that we had to find out the hard way: Most child-proof latches won't work on frameless cabinets - even ones that say they do. There often isn't a long enough throw to get the drawer or door open enough to get your fingers in to operate the latch. The magnetic ones are the way to go. The opening key magnets don't stick to the front of our stainless fridge, but the sides of the fridge are magnetic. We use a learning tower for the grandkids too. They like that it brings them up to counter level so they can help. However to be stable it is fairly large so it only works well in a large kitchen. Also, base sticks out for more stability and I think all the adults have stubbed their toes on it so our relationship with it is a little bit love/hate. Most microwaves have a way to lock the controls. For example on ours you hold the stop button down for 3 seconds. We have had no trouble with it being below counter because it can be locked between use when the kids show an interest in it and that phase didn't last long for us. Our gas rangetop has controls on the front. We agonized about getting that vs a cooktop with controls on top but we really wanted the power of the Bluestar for wok cooking after test driving it vs our cooktop candidates. It hasn't been a problem especially because the igniters go snap-snap as soon as someone turns the knob from off which allows us to hear it and correct the behavior immediately. Our grandson discovered the ability to move a chair and get on it to reach the counter before he was two. Little kids have to be supervised in the kitchen. I wouldn't count on things being above the counter for keeping them safe. As they get older, having a kitchen that can accommodate multiple workers is really nice. For example, our prep sink is on a corner of our island so two people can use it; one from the main prep area at the front and one from side. It also often gets used from the side to wash kids hands without getting in the way of someone doing prep. Then there is also the baking area to the right of the main sink and the counter to the left of the main sink.

If you like to bake, you can give them Cookie Coupons to use throughout the year. When my grands were that small, I made six coupons each, good for anytime during the year with a two day notice. They had their choice of their favorite five kinds of cookies, choc chip, sugar, peanut butter...whatever you decide to list. They had such a good time with this that they requested coupons for Christmas for three years afterwards. Benefits are many. They get to interact with Granma on a personal basis during the year. They get a gift that keeps giving - six times! Homemade are better (and better for them)since they are going to eat something similar anyway. Only one family lived far enough away that the cookies had to be mailed. Even that was fun since the child got real mail of her/his very own.