Well that's the kicker sushi. We have no fault here so each insurance company pays their clients damages. Even if he doesn't report to his insurance company our insurance will and his daughters premiums will go up even if they don;t claim anything. Given the door already had scratches and we were going to get it painted anyway, Clive told him that he would only ask for any costs that were above the original quote. No additional costs then we'd just forget it. That to me is more than reasonable. We did get the new quote and the additional costs over what we had been quoted is $300. That's all we would have asked for. Anyhow, he said what he did. So now Clive will claim the full repairs through insurance and the jerks premiums for his daughter will go up. I wasn't comfortable with charging for the full repair but the insurance company said the entire door needed painting as a result of the accident so existing scratches were irrelevant. The guy really wasn't thinking!

Westwinger, I feel for you!! My guess is that the children's father may not have been abusive either... My DH's ex took the kids from him and moved back in with her parents. Then she started making up allegations of abuse. After I came into the picture, she accused him of sexually abusing his daughter and drugging his son. She has since married and had a child with her new hubby. He thinks that my DH is an abusive/child molesting b*st*rd, and he (ex's hubby) helps her keep the children from my DH. (He hasn't seen them in nearly 3 1/2 years.) When things go down the toilet with them (which I'm sure they will) he will be in for a rude awakening. My Hubby is much like you, a hard working, good man who just wants to come home at the end of the day to a clean house and a hot meal (and a happy, well looked after family). Some women just suck. (To put it really eloquently). If she is already making those types of comments (about abuse) be prepared for anything. Consider keeping a running log of your activities (where you are and when)...especially if you split. You never know if/when she might accuse you of something, and if you keep a clear/concise log, you will be able to show it to police/judges if necessary. I really do mean be prepared for *anything*. In the last three and a half years, We have received over a dozen calls & visits from the RCMP, because of her false accusations. (Everything from child abuse (at the last visit) and stalking, to arson and B&E (we both got finger printed for the B&E). She even got an emergency protection order against him (including the seizure of his hunting equipment) based on false pretenses...he was away working, when he was "witnessed" at her house. If it does get that messy (I really hope it doesn't) remember to always be polite/respectful to the police (DH appologizes to them when they call, and explains that he's in a messy access dispute, and every time we get close to going into court, she does this..."I'm sorry that she is doing this again. I know how busy you guys are already."). The police are smart...if you are decent to them, they get to realize where the problems lie. (They still have to follow up on every complaint...but they get to be very good to deal with. They also understand that it's very frusterating for you.) Whatever you do, don't move out. (It may be tempting, but it weighs heavily against you when/if you go into court.) It may also be helpful to get a mini recorder and keep it with you. (Check your local laws, for useability.) In some states/provinces recordings are admissible as long as one party involved in the conversation is aware of the recording. In other states/provinces, both parties must be aware for it to be admissible. If only you have to be aware, then you may be able to get some good evidence for court. You might be surprised what stupid, self incriminating evidence can be said in the heat of the moment. If you do get something on tape make sure you log the date and time when the conversation took place. (DH's ex told him she was going to make him pay, make him hurt, that he was never going to see his kids again because he didn't deserve them if he wasn't with her, and when she accused him of sexually abusing his daughter she said expressed her anger (with colorful language) at his decision to file for joint custody, and then tacked on the accusation. Unfortunatly, we learned too late that we needed a tape recorder, and never got any of it...without a recording, it's just a bunch of 'he says/she says' and the courts, almost without fail, go in favor of the mother. You have an uphill battle ahead of you, no matter what you decide, but I'm glad to hear you have such good support from your staff. They must really care about you. Take comfort in the knowledge that you are a good man. Things may get worse before they get better, but they *will* get better. With kind thoughts, Verena "It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence to be ever in view and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words, 'And this, too, shall pass away.' How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction." -Abraham Lincoln, addressing the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society in 1859.

My neighbors don't do diddily squat to their yard. Luckily, their paved driveway separates my yard from theirs. However, there is about 5-7 feet on "my side" of their driveway that they actually own. After getting sick of seeing 4 foot tall broadleaf weeds and grassy weeds in that spot, I took my weed eater to it. Since then, I've mower it a few times when my mowing my lawn. I may have "accidentally" over sprayed some weed killer and broadcast some pre-emergent (when I was treating my own lawn, of course). One day, I come home to find them outside, husband and wife, going to town on the at area with garden hoes and shovels. Ripping out thick weeds, tilling the soil, trimming their pathetic shrubs... ... And then, I noticed yesterday there is some grass seed there. I couldn't believe it. I think they started to get the picture; I was taking care of their stuff and they probably felt guilty. I don't have the heart to tell them that you don't plant grass in Central VA at this time of the year, and that they probably just overturned about a gazillion I'm sure they completely destroyed the pre-me barrier that I "accidentally" applied; however, it's almost time for another soon anyway. Meanwhile, my KBG is creeping on over there. I'm sure they will think it's the grass seed they planted, and I'm fine with that.

Oh no, plllog, the trip wasn't spoiled at all. (I get the "can't fathom crazy ladies" thing too, I don't smuggle and declare everything to the point of pedanticness (ed. actually that should be "pedantry" :-) ) :-) ). The funny thing was, the first male Quarantine officer asked if I had declared the cat food on my arrivals form, which I had. "And no one challenged you?" he asked. No, they just waved us through. I hope heads don't roll :-(. I admit I was disappointed when we were first told they wouldn't allow it in, because I thought "what a waste" but I was still hopeful we could shame them into releasing it. But at the same time while we were waiting I was thinking, "This will be a great story," :-)