Kswl,

Are they getting married on the ship or beforehand. You say they are eloping, does that mean you are not at the wedding or is the family going to attend.

also wondering, is family going on cruise. Either way, I think a smart move on their part and I wish them much happiness.

Congratulations! I remember the thread when you were discussing your daughter"s wedding ideas.

Things certainly have changed. I alway thought elopement meant it was a secret and only announced after the fact.

Congratulations. Sounds like your daughter knows what she likes, which is a good thing. I hope they have a wonderful trip and happy marriage.

I thought that as well, ellendi, the whole "run to Gretna Green" thing!

How exciting! But where are the pics of the shoes? :-)

This is my kind of wedding btw. Perfect.

Sounds wonderful. Congratulations!

Yes, this is a very different kind of elopement! She and fiancé are going by themselves on this trip, for a couple of weeks over Christmas. It was the most convenient time for them both and they chose the cruise because neither of them has been to Panama. (Their first honeymoon idea was Switzerland; considering recent events in Europe I am glad they will be in Central America!)

They are getting married on the ship by the captain---I can't wait to see the pictures....she is too young for me to make Love Boat references, lol, but I do hope the captain will be tricked out in his full maritime regalia! There is a wedding coordinator on board who has already arranged it all. DD had her hair styled the way she wants it by her regular person for pictures to show the onboard stylist and has a spa appointment the day of the ceremony (taking her own nail polish for the color.) They have ordered champagne and a very small cake with red roses on top, and have reservations for a special dinner afterwards. They have a photographer for a couple of hours and will be doing pictures all over the ship, apparently. I think they are going to have a whale of a good time----a "real" wedding, but for two :-)

Kswl, you are a much better person than me. It makes me sad that you will not be there for your daughter's wedding.

Exciting tImes!

My nephew eloped a couple of years ago, we all knew the where and when in advance. Although his mother was sad for a few hours on the actual day of the wedding, she had no long lasting sadness about missing it.

Best wishes to the bride and groom!

Now that you've explained it that way, I agree - it IS a very romantic way to get married. It all sounds lovely and you don't sound anything like the typical frazzled MOB which is all the more reason to support this idea! Will you be having a reception party for them at some point?

Thanks for explaining:)

Yes, we are having a family celebration for relatives only after the new year. DD's six best gf's are hosting a weekend party for her in Las Vegas the week after Thanksgiving-----that is apparently the place they're all having parties now---and since she works in Phoenix during the week that's actually closer for her than any other destination. Fiancé is off this weekend with ten buddies, a brother and BIL having a sendoff somewhere. These are their closest friends who did not want to be completely left out. :-) so they are still enjoying some of the wedding "perks" despite eloping.

(Destination parties like this are way OTT, IMO, not that anyone asked and I didn't offer the opinion. Who knew those tacky wedding movies would have so much influence???)

Actually though, this is not eloping--the definition of elopement is when a couple secretly steals away to an unannounced destination to get married, usually without parental permission.

Not sure there is a particular name for a couple choosing to take a trip and get married :), but sounds like your daughter and her fiancée are very happy and have a great plan!

Kswl2, my husband and I married similarly to how your daughter is. I've always told others that we eloped even though we had our parents' blessings ahead of time. I sometimes regret that I didn't have a wedding but financially it was a very good choice for us early in our marriage. My grandparents especially supported it because they are sometimes taken aback by the grandeur of weddings.

editing to add... congratulations to them and to you and your DH. I wish them many happy years together.

I think it sounds extraordinarily romantic and personal.. and glad that you were able to participate in selecting the dress, shoes and providing the "something borrowed". Best wishes for all of you!

Thank you Lisa and all others! We didn't know what they would decide although we knew by March that they weren't having a traditional wedding because they hadn't made any plans.

We gave the couple a gift of the cost of a wedding with no strings attached to have a wedding or not, and were happy they chose to invest rather than spend it all on a single day---not that there is anything wrong with that if it's the couples' dream. DD is uber practical and he is just happy to do what she wanted. Our boys are not so practical...faced with the same choice, DS1 would probably invest in a crazy risky business "opportunity" and DS2 would spend the wad getting the (surviving members of the) Grateful Dead to play at the reception!

I remember you mentioning them getting married in NYC, but the cruise sounds perfect. It's refreshing to hear about a couple keeping it simple and not opting for the big affair. It would be nice to see a return to more modest weddings.

Congrats to your family and the happy couple!

I think the NYC trip was their fourth or fifth idea........the natural history of this not-quite-an-elopement was circuitous, to say the least!

Wonderful. Congratulations.

What a great plan, and so romantic !

Congratuations!

KSWL - Very exciting! I have been wondering about the plans. Have fun with your shoe delivery trip.

Ok- Now how about pictures of the shoes? ...I just want to comment that you must have a wonderful relationship with your daughter that she trusts you with the shoes!

My DD has decided she wants to get married at home. I am definitely going to push the "check and ladder" idea.

Congrats to all! Sounds like a wonderful plan. :)

I eloped to Jamaica last year, it was amazing ... very glad we made that decision.

Congratulations to you all! Can't wait to see all the photos, especially the dress & shoes she has picked (another shoe addict here). IMO the planning with your DD is just as much fun, if not more, as the actual frantic wedding day itself, so you are enjoying the best part.

To me, the modern wedding has gotten so out of hand and so overwrought, it has become very disconnected from the sanctity and sweetness of marriage and feels more like the world's most overproduced mega selfie.

Kudos to your daughter and future SIL for taking back the day for themselves.

I think it sounds wonderful!

I don't get the big bucks on weddings either. So much more could be done with the money, especially for a young couple. We spent about $3k on our wedding and honeymoon. The wedding was small, with family and good friends and we have very precious memories of the day. I don't think a bigger, more extravagant wedding would have created better memories for us.

Congratulations KSWL, not only for the marriage of your DD but for raising a very smart young woman!

Congratulations! Sounds like a great idea!

I also am super curious about the red flats, were Tieks on the list ? not fancy enough maybe?

I think it sounds like they are doing just what they want to do and isn't that how a wedding should be? Congratulations!

It all sounds wonderfully romantic! I can hear the excitement you feel for them in what you've written here. I wish them a beautiful day filled with lovely things to remember. I personally think their rather low-key plans sound ideal. Not that being married on a Panama Canal cruise is low-key, but hopefully you know what I mean. They aren't staging some huge production. I like the thought of it all.

To each his/her own. We gave both DD & DS an equal amount - no strings - to spend toward a wedding. Different personalities, different circumstances, 2 very different weddings. Happy brides, grooms & memories all around.

Congratulations & Best Wishes to you all!

The shoes are a completely crazy range of very low to very high :-). From Forever 21 to Manolo Blahnik! The two requirements were pointed toes and a deep red.

Mitchdesi, I am a Tieks freak :-). But, Tieks have a round toe which she did not want. I thought they'd be great because they could serve as something blue also (the sole and the blue stripe up the back)!

Amck I could not agree with you more, and it's interesting to see what our kids will choose for themselves when given that choice :-). I would have gladly helped plan a wedding but it probably would have ended up with me making all the decisions. This tiny wedding is really all she had the patience for. Hey....maybe that can be a new trend.....Tiny Weddings!

Thanks everyone for your well wishes, and felicitations to you and your husband, MsGG!!

Congratulations to you all with these upcoming nuptials. More and more of the "kids" getting married these days that I know, are looking at small, intimate weddings, with more money left to spend on their honeymoons and homes instead.

Congratulations to you and your DD! You are to be applauded for continuing to support them in their decisions. This is "elopement" in the very best sense.

Not to threadjack, but I recently received an invitation to a wedding that is also a themed period costume party, held at the a five star hotel (guests are requested to dress in theme). Probably at the other end of the spectrum....

Gooster, they are merely living out the modern dream of beng the stars of their own life show. Theirs must be a costume drama :-).

Gooster, they are merely living out the modern dream of beng the stars of their own life show. Theirs must be a costume drama :-).

adding, my comment sounds unkind on second reading. If they are historians or have a special interest in a certain period, or are theater folk who want costumes to evoke past roles or performances, or their grandparents or great grandparents were immigrants from a certain country in a particular time period, I could certainly understand the significance of period costuming and its importance to the couple! Otoh, if they are just orchestrating their wedding for the cool pictures and it reflects nothing about their shared or individual history or interests, then my original comment about being the stars of their own show might well describe the situation. In any case, it's their party :-)

@kswl -- don't worry, it may be a shared interest but it's none of the former, I believe. The website even gives you the color swatches so you can plan your outfit and has little profiles of the wedding entourage.