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kellyjo763

Full time Stepmom ... new here..

14 years ago

I am very happy to find this site. I feel like no one understands what I am going through but after reading the posts here I find that people actually do. My issue is a little different than the others though. My husband and I have been married for 7 years. His daughter, who is 11 now, lives with us full time and has always (since she was 2). BM sees her every other weekend and for 4 weeks in the summer. My husband works out of town Monday thru Friday (engineer) so he is only home on the weekends. Therefore, technically I am the full time stay at home caregiver for Emma. There really havent been any big issues (other than the normal ones) until this year. Now I am being hit with being the "bad guy" all of the time. She is getting a smart mouth, is disrespectful, doesnt want to do homework, throws amazingly big dramatic fits. I am sure it is hormonal but I feel like I am raising this child alone. I feel like all I do is harp on her (do your homework, do your chores, turn the TV off, etc). BM is famous for "sideline" parenting (first to tell us WHAT we are doing wrong) and Dad is now morphing in to the "absent parent needs to coddle child" mode. When Emma goes to her moms she is doted on and there really are no rules. Its "fun time". When Dad gets home on the weekends it is also "fun time". I push for he and Emma to go do things alone so that they can keep the dad/daughter bond. I feel like I need to get a sicle and a black cape and tatoo "crypt keeper" on my forehead.

Everything I read is "let the parents handle it" or "disengage" but I cant because I am technically the only parent 28 days out of 30. I feel like I need to start on medication.

Any ideas I can try to incorporate?

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