It's odd. I think I'd have to know her better to know how I would feel. But yeah, it's strange.

It brings to mind that old saying - what she did says more about her than you.

Well, you like Halloween, and that is a legit creepy story. Jealous people frighten me. As my youngest would say, She has issues. Steer clear.

Depending on your boss I would mention it. It sounds like she has mental emotional problems that I would be concerned about. Just state that you found it a little odd and was a little concerned about her. I would also be very careful around her.

I don't think she has mental issues, just social ones.

I think you reacted exactly the way you should have, but I agree with others that this is a disturbed individual and you need to take care around her. In fact, I would probably be keeping a file with dates recording her odd actions when they occur.

As we southerners say, bless her heart! And try to ignore her. But I agree, it's kind of creepy.

I agree. I had to let a "friend" go recently. I realized she wanted to be me but wouldn't admit to it so did her best to get me involved in things of interest to her. As soon as I joined in and became enthusiastic about the possibilities of something she would start to trash talk the activity, place, whatever and "decide" she didn't want to that anymore attempting to influence me into joining her decision. However I soon saw she didn't want to make decisions. She wanted me to make them so she could blame me it things went sideways. People who try to mirror others or project others to mirror them have psychological issues IMO.

I see a lot of similarities in your story about the behavior of these women even though my examples are different. So I agree with those above. Stay pleasant but distant. She's trouble.

I should mention that I texted my boss asking if he was aware of her costume plans, and he said he was. He knows that I would not be offended, and shares the belief that she is jealous of me. Why I do not know. I am nothing extraordinary, I am just a normal person. But anyway, apparently she has been planning it all month and was VERY excited about it. Most people here (including me) just kind of humor her in whatever she does.

Weird.

Amylou, you seem like a very authentic person, someone with integrity and a zest for life. Look around you and tell me those are common traits.

If she has been planning for a whole month she is dangerous. Be very, very careful.

I agree it is odd. I would limit contact with her.

Yep, creepy. Also, a month of planning and that was it? Genius. I'd be glad to work opposite shifts.

Creepy. Really creepy.

It sounds like she has mental emotional problems that I would be concerned about. Just state that you found it a little odd and was a little concerned about her. I would also be very careful around her.

Totally agree with Maifleur.

She does not seem to be asking you to be a role model or mentor.

While the present scenario is that she is admiring what many of us agree are your many admirable qualities, she is not only filling up her time trying to be you, she is doing so by shorting herself of the time she needs to be her, a losing game any way you look at it.

I think you handled it very well. Sounding as if this is normal behavior, not blowing it up or out of proportion....that's keeping it out of the Human Resources office. I wouldn't want her fired. I'd just keep an "eye-on-her". The fact she works another shift is a bonus. Her behavior would make me uncomfortable.....yet...I don't think she's dangerous. Kooky maybe....☺ Yes, I agree. Creepy.

I relate. I had a coworker sit at "my" desk, because she said I had a "lucky" desk. Not that I was good at sales(she'd reset the type size and other settings. Pushed my photo of my husband behind the computer. Left coffee stains on the desk. My desk was "reserved" and I didn't share a desk, because of my sales status. I reported her and she said I did it because I didn't want her to be a success.☺) Or.....a coworker that said she asked herself, "What would Nicole do?" Being a top seller attracted a LOT of unwanted attention. I believe your decorating for the holidays is attracting a LOT of unwanted attention. Can you see that? It's not a fault...just an observation. Don't stop being you. Your obviously doing a good job....of being you. ♥ I do think she wants what you have tho....

I wrote a comment a while ago, but it's not here.

I'd be concerned as well. I don't subscribe to the adage that mimicry is the sincerest form of flattery.

Is she so low in self-esteem that she doesn't like herself? Is she jealous that the drivers and other co-workers and your boss like you, perhaps more than they do her?

I'd be keeping notes. If she starts wearing her hair in the same style as yours or other similar weird suggestions, report her.

Jasdip,

your comment is on the Halloween thread

With your SO, other drivers, other employees, and most importantly, your boss, all on your side, I don't think you need to do anything drastic. But it would not be a bad idea to quietly inform your boss of this person's "costume" and ask that they make a note of it on their calendar. Then if things get weirder in the future, it won't be only your word against hers, your boss will have a record with this incident.

None of the above.

I long ago moved on from trying to understand or figure out people and causes of their peculiar, senseless or even sometimes random comments or behavior that can be encountered unexpectedly. That seemingly make no sense.

I wouldn't waste a moment thinking about it. It doesn't matter.

I can’t say her choice to express herself that way was the greatest idea but I don’t think it’s jealousy. You seem to be very comfortable in your own skin and I suspect that she probably admires how you’re able to just be yourself.

Whoa, that is really weird. I think Ive seen horror movies with that story line. I’d give her a wide berth and don’t ever let her be your roommate.

HamiltonGardener, thanks! My mouse must have clicked on the wrong title, as I didn't even read that thread. It's deleted. BTW, do I recognize your name from the vermicomposting forum from way back?

Yes, you got it right. I remembered you too.

You know, I still have the generations of offspring of those worms still going strong, all these years later.

Amylou, you seem to be a fun, joyful person whom I would assume many would like to emulate. That being said, if it makes you feel the least bit uncomfortable, there is no harm or shame in distancing yourself from her. Like Elmer said, I have long ago stopped trying to figure people out or letting their actions affect me. If you would like to be her friend, do so, if not, keep her at arms length. I am 60 years old and it has only been in the last ten years that I have learned that it is okay to sever yourself from "friends" whose actions/comments/responses impact you in a negative way. Just keep being your normal pink, holiday loving self. You are fabulous!

I also think it’s creepy. I think she’s jealous of you because you have the confidence to express yourself and not give two pins what others think, and you are creative and fun and generous and everyone else likes you. She only brings greed, obnoxiousness and cluelessness to the table, and I suspect she’s not terribly popular.

But, I’d be keeping an eye on her to be sure she doesn’t go all Single White Female on you.

I think it’s weird and kind of creepy and I would interact with her as little as possible.

I think she was just joking having some fun, no harm. It sounds like a friendly family owned trucking, delivery company. Everyone knows everyone, like a big family.

No matter what her intentions it fell flat. Maybe that will get it out of her system. I would be polite but limit my contact with her as much as possible.

Does your SO work there too? Curious if she flirts with him.

Lisa he is a truck driver and loads here. Or used to anyway. She has never flirted with him that I know of.

I would not be amused and find it very creepy.

She sounds like someone who is unhappy with herself and admires you. it is sad for her, she should spend her time being who she is or wants to be in her own skin, not someone else. you do seem to have great qualities so encourage her to find herself and be herself - taking baby steps.

I think there was an episode of Will and Grace with Molly Shannon playing Val Bassett. In one of the episodes, Val steals Grace's music box and pretends that it is hers. I think she is trying to be Grace and therefore thinks that something that belongs to Grace actually belongs to her.

No one has ever wanted to be me that I know of, but they have wanted my job as a furniture designer. No one ever got it, however.

She likes you. Pink shirt + blonde wig + witch hat = cheap, easy costume. (I suspect that she may be like me and is creatively challenged when it come to things like thinking up cool Halloween costumes.)

I wouldn't give it any more thought. Just be flattered, move on and find something else to worry about. :-)

My initial reaction and answer to your post was that you should be flattered. I did think maybe she has some issues and is just otherwise awkward and this is just another example of that. I didn't perceive anything really wrong or dangerous about it.

Then, after reading through the posts, I was a bit surprised that so many thought it was more than just a little creepy or off.

I do think it's not your typical action or selection of Halloween costumes, so maybe I do now think it's more off than not.........

I wouldn't read that much into it. It was Halloween. She probably had a pink shirt and thought, "This will be easy; all I need is a blonde wig." My brother once went as David Letterman, not because he was a big fan, but because he already had a jacket and tie, and only needed to get tooth blackout to make a space. I myself once went as a nun because I found a cheap costume in a drugstore. (BTW, I carried a ruler and was VERY popular at the party with guys who had a certain inclination.) If she started wearing pink all the time or had her hair dyed, then I would be worried. But a lot us aren't really into working on costumes, so when one is called for, we go for what's easy.

You are dealing with BIzzaro Amylou123. Understand that she is weird and leave it at that.

Well, I agree with the "Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery" line of thought. And I think your reaction was exactly right. I'm really surprised so many seem to think it is 'creepy', or sinister in some way. Even though I probably watch entirely too much of the Investigative Discovery channel, and Forensic Files, I keep a pretty positive attitude about people and their actions. I really think she thought she was complementing you. I'm not sure how I would feel if something like that were to happen to me, probably like you, confused. Your boss does know about it, and the drivers and other workers are aware of her attempts to imitate your actions, so bases are covered 'just in case'.

Rusty

I think you handled the situation perfectly, and agree she is just a little creepy. Just one small caution....keep your desk with personal stuff locked at all times, even when just going to a copier or restroom. It's just a good practice.

I'm also surprised that anyone would tbink her behavior creepy or scary. I'd jump right in with the joke and make a couple of Amy nametags. Hers can say "Not Amy".

I'm pretty much of the same mind as Rusty. You are popular with your coworkers and drivers, you are creative and somewhat daring, you don't suffer fools gladly and you seem to display a great deal of self confidence. I think she is just jealous of you and your position in the workplace and is trying to be more like you in an attempt to make herself more likable and popular.

I think it is more pathetic than creepy. People who are secure in themselves don't want to be someone else and are happy reveling in their own uniqueness. She seems to be missing the point.

That sure doesn't sound like normal behavior to me. I would be very careful with this woman. I think you should continue to behave as if it doesn't bother you, otherwise she may start behaving even worse.

amylou, she can pretend all the likes, but she will never be you !

I could be wrong, but I don't think it's creepy or scary. I think she's just desperate to be loved and she sees how everyone loves you. I had a friend years ago that was very needy and DH once said to me, She just wants to be loved. I thought about it and decided he hit the nail on the head. I think your co-worker falls in the same category. I think for self-protection you just have to continue doing what you are doing. Don't encourage, don't discourage, just be you.

That sounds really bizarre to me!

It sounds "off" to me as well. I would probably pull back on personal info I shared around her. And I'd definitely keep my eyes open.

I think this is a woman with a personality disorder. She is mimicking you to look/feel normal. To be liked. Hopefully, it does into go to extremes but she is creepy and I would keep an eye on her.

The vast majority say to be careful. It doesn't hurt to be a little more careful and pay attention, better safe than sorry.

Skipped down after reading about half the comments to say some of the more negative reactions brought to mind that thriller movie with Jennifer Jason Leigh & Bridget Fonda about the roommate who starts dressing like and mimicking the main character.

Found it - Single White Female...

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0105414/

I am sure this is nothing as dramatic that. Just couldn't help remarking on it ☺

I’m with Georgysmom, I think she hit the nail on the head.