Here is what I learned from my two millennials. Nothing is a big deal. They figure it out, just not the way that we would.

They often don't plan in advance. (Literally, I would be breaking out in hives if I didn't have that airline ticket yesterday) But, it somehow works out. And you know, if it doesn't, they are okay with it. Just move on, no harm no foul.

There are many options nowadays and they know how to gather information at record speed.

My frustration is that my oldest often ASSUMES that she can count on us because often times she can.

However, after cancelling and rearranges my schedule a few times, I am now no longer willing to jump in at the last minute. If you know ahead of time, than let me know ahead of time.

ETA: Case in point, oldest just posted on Instagram from the laundromat. She just realized she needs to do laundry for her trip tomorrow.

Do your adult children frustrate you?

Boy, is THAT an understatement!

I don’t know. My son is 31 and not an adult yet. ;-)

Ugh~this is not encouraging.

my oldest used to frustrate me big time. Now I’m just jealous of his lifestyle. He sent me this pic from Mexico, taken a couple days ago. He really should have taken my advice and gotten a job where he sits in a cubicle all day. ;)

It certainly is a case of different strokes for different ( younger) folks and isn’t it wonderful when it works out, dedtired?

Dedtired, how kool is that! You are not alone, I think the majority of us feel a tinge of jealousy. LOL

My middle aged daughter used to frustrate me and still does on occasion, I’m just grateful that she’s entered a more mellow stage in life.

By the way, Delilah, that text is hilarious. Woudnt you just like to bonk them on the head sometimes?

My son is not so young. He’s 50. I was ten when he was born.

Right there with you all! DS is former military and still works in it’s private sector. My emails and messages to him are chatty and usually humorous. His back are one to three words! It’s a lot better, though, when we chat on the phone most every weekend. And, when we’re there visiting them. Thankfully, we’ll be back there for a visit next month. But, truthfully, I miss my (semi) innocent boy when he still lived here at home! But, adding together the military and being the boss in charge of a large contingent doing whatever they do, he tends to give/bark directives . . . which, being his mom, forces me to smack him down (verbally) on occasion (LOL)!

As for DD, at (just recently) 25, she’s very even-keeled . . . 98% of the time, anyway. The “drama queen days” are thankfully behind us now, although she was, even then, more calm then most of her friends. BTW, she receives her Masters in just 2 weeks and just accepted a really great full time job (with great benefits, thank goodness!!!!!!!!).

Congrats LynnNm- that is great!

Kool Beans, inquiring minds (mine anyway) want to know if you had another name previously used on GW?

dedtired, my little boy is 48 and so am I.

Lynn, I’m so grateful for the good man, husband and father my idjit has become. He has a wonderful dry sense of humor, (note how he wants his daughter to get the cat, thus the estate?), but is a man of few words, too. Good to hear your DD has done so well!

My oldest son will be 40 this summer. I'm going to start telling people that he's my nephew - my much older brother's son.

Lynn, that’s awesome news about your DS & DD, I still remember a lot of your posts about different happenings, I’m glad they are doing so well!

Oh! Hi Lukki! I remember you. I just hate wondering who might be one I once knew...if that makes sense. I occasionally might ponder where so and so has gone and why, and if they are here and have been all along. Frustrates me. I do miss so many from years ( about [5 for me) past. I wish for a post where everyone came aboard and ‘fessed up.

fondly,

marti/ leahcate

And where is Allison?

That was a typo...15 years for me. And thank you for your inquiring mind, Delilah .)

Laughing at ded and Delilah...my oldest is 27 and I always say — you know, when I was pregnant in middle school it was embarrassing, but now I’m glad to be a younger mom.

And my 27 yo manchild could not be more frustrating if he tried. Latest is that he decided to quit his job of 3 years before having a new job lined up. Which is one of the things we’ve told him never to do. Told him 486 times. He’s now been unemployed since Feb.

Adult child #2 was the Perfect Boy until he decided to take a job across the country. We still have DD with us, I guess she’s an adult now that she’s 18. She’ll be leaving for college soon and then the only kid nearby will be the manchild. Help. Me.

Hi Marti!!, yeah I wonder that now and then too...I was trying to figure out a quiet way to let the gang know. I think an ongoing announcement thread is a cool idea. I’ve been on since 2007, can’t even name all the folks I miss. :c(

I don't have any adult children, much less any children...

But, I'm certain as an early adult I frustrated my parents at times. TBH, I know I did. They told me.

It all worked out eventually.

My sons are now 32 and 30 and no longer frustrate me. Frustrating to their partners however is a whole other story. It's a good thing my sons give great hugs.

We just had our 'adult' sons (& DIL & granddaughter) here for 8 days and after they leave I go through a combination mourning period and basking in the glow every time. Today I'm cleaning and reclaiming my house. As I wash sheets, wash away sticky fingerprints and pick up toys, I'm too busy hearing 'If you're happy and you know it' in my head with a visual of DGD clapping her hands with me to be frustrated. But ask me in a couple of days ;-)

The problem with announcement threads is that I then have to remember who is (or used to be) who! Don't know about you, but I don't have that kind of scorecard brain! Kool Beans you can add on to your name - I added the GW part as a signal more than anything else. You could add Lukki. I honestly wish more people would do that.

My 35 year old daughter still is policing the world. And it frustrates me, as I see myself at her age. I finally take everything in stride, and don't get upset much. But she gets agitated at people not doing their jobs, not doing what they say they will etc. I remember those days, policing the world is a hard tiring.

ladypat my youngest is somewhat like that but doesn't yet see the incongruity in policing his housemates for infractions that I KNOW he makes as well!

This just popped up in my pinterest - think they know about this discussion?! Checked out the website and there are some funny t-shirts there (as well as a lot of lame ones)

My older son always wanted to have kids. He's a terrific dad because he never forgot how to play.

My younger son told us he never wanted to have kids. That was, he confessed, so that we wouldn't nag him about having children. Now his DD is about to have a younger sibling.

In answer to your question, not as much as my DH frustrates me.....

Best, that's a whole other thread!

I am positive that I occasionally frustrate my parents.

It looks like you wanted your son to call you right away to give you the SSN so you could keep moving forward setting things up with your financial manager. I know I often get completely overwhelmed at work with back to back meetings and by the time the day is over I am exhausted and sometimes forget what was messaged earlier. Some days I don't even have a moment to use the restroom before I'm late for another meeting, let alone an opportunity to make a phone call. Maybe your son has similar challenges during the day. Just a thought...

DLM, I want that t-shirt! Before my middle son moved out to AZ, we had a family dinner out and I gave all 3 of the kids this t-shirt...

Pffftt. You guys don't know nuthin' about this subject. We have SIX adult children who have SIX adult spouses! Just try getting all twelve a them kids and all a their EIGHT kids to settle on a date or venue. Some of the kids are born organizers, some are born procrastinators, some know the plan in their heads but forget to tell the rest of us.

Hub and I have learned to just be where they tell us to be or cook what they want to eat, or put clean sheets on the beds when they say We will be there in five hours, ok? or join them in and when whatever venue they select. For instance, while I am writing this very message, Hub took a call from one of the kids saying Meet us for dinner at such and so in an hour. Ok! We will!

Somehow almost all 22 of us manage to gather happily together in one or another's home for a few days at most holidays, and we even spend one entire week together on vacation every summer! Now that week is a real trip! It's the best week of the year! The organizer kids sometimes come close to murdering the procrastinator kids, but eventually we all eat or go somewhere or do something. You just gotta roll with it.

One of our sons-in-law has finally said I can't do the vacation anymore...He's staying home this year, will probably relish the peace and quiet in his own home. I told him he was getting old! I wonder who will be the first to notice that he isn't there.

DLM2000-GW Love that shirt! Yes, I am sure I am only hearing one side of the story, I bet some people wish daughter would just take a chill pill. Work friends gave her a badge one time!

sheesh - one of my kids lives their life through a spreadsheet and the other one, not so much.

I've learned to speak their language. That is, don't bug them unless it's something they really need to know or would like to hear. When they're ready they're super chatty and fun as all get out, but if I push them to communicate or make plans, forget it. So I go with the flow and meet up to their expectations instead. It's sure made my life a lot easier.

My mother always demanded we attend holidays and functions at her house, regardless of our lives and it caused a lot of resentment. I'm a little sad that the traditions I grew up with have now changed, but I realize my kids prefer to set their own traditions. Some have been kept, but we now make new ones.

My most frustrating is my youngest. A younger fellow at work recently said that guys today are a bunch of Peter Pans, and I think he's right! My son just won't settle down. He's 31 and still prefers skateboarding and hanging with his buddies drinking beer and playing D&D than having a serious relationship with woman (heck, I'd even be happy if he chose a serios relationship with a man, as long as he'd just settle down already!) But even my younger DD is so frustrating. She's too creative for her own good and is constantly changing her on-line shop/blog/studio. She's doing incredibly well, and she could do even better if she'd just settle already! But I don't say anything.

DD couldn't possibly get more organized. She is just naturally that way. Very detail-oriented. Works well since she needs that for her career.

DS needs to be so much more organized. He's beset with disabilities though so that's not likely to happen. So as others have said I don't say anything I just roll with the punches.

Yeo, you just described my two sons!

My youngest (DD) is exactly like my 2nd son (the organized one), thank god.

pricklypearcactus that’s so kind of you to come to his defense, but his after work time is pretty loose: gym, eat, read a story to his daughter who is in bed lights out by 8. He is just a procrastinator!

ladypat - I have your daughter’s syndrome. When I mention to my sister a wrong that should be righted, she promotes me to chief in charge of it!

I would sometimes get frustrated if my adult sons didn’t text me back. If it’s something important I have learned that if I first post a picture of the dogs and then my message I get a reply fairly fast.

Hi Marti! I left during the S controversy - a bit too much repetitive drama for me - and joined the FB group. I have only popped over 2x since, including this morning. The Kitchen and Decorating sides became too much of the same. Spending too much time on computer without taking away much. You know how it goes. You're welcome to find me on FB or IG, if you haven't already. Not that I post much on either. LOL

Back to the OP, I'd say DS is the most frustrating when it comes to communication. Sure, he sends cute photos of DGD, but when it comes to an actual conversation, it's only when he has a question. I find younger (than DH) boys tend to respond at a MUCH SLOWER rate than younger girls (all are in their 30s).

Hope everyone is doing well!

Allison! Now wait just a doggone minute - you pop back in here after falling off the face of GW and not a word or a pic about your house! Harrumph! Yeah yeah yeah I know the local drama and all that became overwrought just about immediately but still..... You were showcasing everything, getting so close to done(ish) and I/we (no way was I the only one) waited for an all in one reveal then, poof! Come on.... start a new all in one reveal...pretty please?

cpartist posted a reveal despite how angry she was ... please Allison. Some of us can’t do FB.

I will see what I can come up with. I really haven't taken photos since the last time I posted here... and will have to go see where I left off. Sorry! Our last house is still on the market, so almost all of my artwork is still there (trying to avoid painting the entire house). DD1 will want to me watermark anything of hers I borrow.