Why on earth do they do it this way?
9 years ago
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- 9 years agolast modified: 9 years ago
- 9 years agolast modified: 9 years ago
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Why do I feel this way?
Comments (5)Gloria, don't feel badly about feeling that way. It's not that we don't love the ones left here, but we desperately want to get to our child on the other side especially if we didn't get to say "goodbye". Maybe it's like we have "unfinished business" that we can't wait to "finish". I don't know that you all feel this way, but I'm guessing. I'm not even sure what my reasoning is other than the fact that I know I miss her so much and want to see her again. I never have been afraid to die and would not mind going at any time either. I hate for my son and husband to have to grieve, though. My husband always says if I go before him, he won't make it. Of course he will, but that's what he says. I always think that if people REALLY have faith and believe in heaven and that it is so much better than here, why in the world would they be afraid to die????? I guess it's the unknown. Lu...See MoreWhy I decorate the way I do...
Comments (7)For every person who wants a first floor master bedroom, there's someone who doesn't. For every person who needs a bathtub in every bathroom, there's someone who would change them all to huge, elaborate showers. For every person who wants granite counter tops in the kitchen, there's someone who would prefer Corian, or Formica, or marble. For every person who wants hardwood, there's someone who wants wall-to-wall carpet. There's only so much you can do for resale. Don't chose something you dislike just for resale value. Do consider resale if you are doing something outside the norm. I remember a thread on the Buying/Selling Homes forum where someone was designing a new house and wanted to eliminate any trace of a formal dining room, as well as an eat-in kitchen. Wanted nothing but a breakfast bar in the family room. Many posters warned about resale value in that thread, with most saying to have a room that would for his family, but could easily be converted to a dining room if they ever sold. Same thing with taking out all the bathtubs. Most people recommend leaving one in the house. Decorate so that you can live in and enjoy the house. If you make radical changes, incorporate a way for other owners to easily change them. Here's an example: My brother and SIL have a child who is physically disabled. They were debating between a wheelchair accessible addition to their house or buying an new house that had already been adapted for a wheelchair user. What they found while house-hunting was that most handicapped-accessible additions were not well-thought-out. Most were just stuck onto the existing house without any thought to the traffic patterns in the house or how the house would look from the outside. They were basically functional, but ugly, patches on the existing house. So they worked with an architect to add onto their house. They lost the windows in the dining room. They added a family room which they didn't have, a mud room/laundry room which they didn't have, an accessible bathroom with the most luxurious roll-in shower that looks like a spa, and a bedroom for my nephew. You don't notice the lack of windows in the dining room because it is open-plan with the living room and get sunlight from there, as well as from the french doors that separate it from the family room. As much as possible, there is nothing in the addition that screams "I am wheelchair accessible!" The doorways are wider, the shower doesn't have a step into it, there's a ramp up to the mudroom door. Probably the main thing is that most of the doors are pocket doors that are easy to slide open and don't get in the way of wheelchairs. But nearly everything is a stock fitting from regular building stores. Future owners could turn the addition into a nice master suite if they changed out the french doors. It would also be possible to easily turn the mud room/laundry room into a small kitchenette and make the addition into a MIL apartment. Or the new owners could use the house as is. The key thing is that there are *options* for future owners. The house is not just suitable for persons with disabilities, the way some of the houses they looked at were....See MoreWhy do you do it? And what are you getting out of it?
Comments (26)It would seem I'm a bit younger than most here. I'm 30, grew up in a home with one sister, and parents that were relatively frugal. My father was the more frugal one, avoiding debt, not wanting to spend money on anything he didn't need. He didn't have much of a reason, just that debt was a bad thing to have, for several reasons. We never went without, though, taking family trips each year to various places around the country. We always had good food, nice home and vehicles, etc. I started a summer job when I was 14, then an afterschool / full time job through high school and college. I started with my current employer 10 years ago, making less than the rest of my peers. Living on my own, and making more than I ever had before, I thought it would be wise to start furnishing my apartment and buy a brand new car, despite having a perfectly good vehicle already. This new car wasn't designed for Colorado winters, so I kept the other car as well as the new one. Along with that brand new car, I got brand new insurance, which was quite a bit. This all stretched me pretty thin, living paycheck to paycheck. At one point, my company was going through layoffs, and I was concerned that I would be one of those laid off. I was pretty worried about how I was going to pay my bills, and whether or not I was going to lose my vehicle and whatnot. My father payed off my car for me, and even though I didn't get laid off, I continued to pay him what the loan payments would have been. Bonuses and other extra payments went to pay off the car a couple of years earlier than I was scheduled. This opened my eyes to what could happen if I "lived the American way", and bought whatever I wanted, at whatever price I wanted. At some point, I could be in this situation again, and I don't want to have to worry if something should happen to my income. I paid off all of my debt, and then started finding ways to live more frugally. I started shopping around for the best deals, taking things that others didn't want anymore, and didn't buy things I didn't need. When I wanted something, I usually waited at least a week, at which time I rarely wanted whatever it was in the first place. I was able to direct deposit money into two accounts, so I gave myself an allowance each paycheck, with the rest going to a savings account. The allowance was enough to cover all bills, and still have some left over for entertainment. I also started contributing to a 401k, and each pay raise translated to an increase in the percent going to the 401k. After a few years, my winter car died on me, so I found another winter vehicle for around $1000 to get me around. I did this a couple of times over the next 5 years. All the while, I was still finding ways to lower my outgoing expenses. After those 5 years, I had enough to put down 20% on a house. I found one that had a low mortgage, even though I could qualify for much more. I readjusted my allowance, and continued finding ways to lower expenses in my house. My father never did much in the way of home or auto work himself. He always paid someone else to, so I don't have much knowledge in that regard. That hasn't stopped me from using the internet and friends to figure out how to do things myself, which has saved me countless dollars. I finally paid cash for a good all-use pickup, so I won't have to worry about vehicles for quite a while. All through this, I've continued to build my savings and emergency fund. Once the economy went down the crapper, nothing really changed for me. I still lived my life how I had before, quite comfortably. All of my friends, who have continued to make more than me, are struggling to pay their bills. Throughout the years, they gave me crap for being cheap, yet look at us now. I have no stress, as far as money is concerned. I have over 9 months of living expenses in a true emergency account, am funding a 401k and Roth IRA, and managed to save enough for my honeymoon cruise to Antarctica next year. If something were to happen, my fiancee and I would be in a decent position to handle what occurs. We have everything we want, and need, and are able to do basically what we want. If I screw up my timecard, and don't get paid, I don't have to worry about waiting an extra week for my money. If something breaks in my house, I know I can take care of the problem, one way or the other. Once we have children, I know we will be able to meet their needs, at least financially. Once we retire, hopefully we will be comfortable at that point, too. Ultimately, what I am getting out of being frugal is peace of mind, with regards to money. It's also nice to see just how far I can stretch something, how many different incarnations an item can turn into before it is truly unusable....See MoreCutting- How on earth do you DO this?!!
Comments (32)What a difference a tool makes!!! I took back the horrendous wet-tile saw, and came back with a "better" set of nippers. 7", with a carbonite (is that the correct word?) edge- so stays sharp. OMG what a difference! I could tell the instant I made that first cut. OMG what a difference! Chapter 1: Newbie finally gets the tool right, and chops up a plate!!! (obviously I didn't put it back together 'right.')...See More- 9 years ago
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