I just found the news article and read it HERE.

It sounds like this was a trip that was planned, and his wife is 11 weeks pregnant, so the pregnancy may have happened after it was set up.

"Beare
(his wife) said the trip to Russia was part of her husband’s plan to summit the
world’s seven highest peaks after having already climbed Mount
Kilimanjaro in Tanzania and many of Colorado’s 14,000-foot-plus
mountains."

The snow storm came from nowhere, according to the article, so I think it's just a totally unexpected event in what otherwise sounds like something the man could handle with relative ease. It appears that it it was a one day up and one day down climb, if the blizzard hadn't happened.

"Beare’s wife, Olivia, who is pregnant with the couple’s second child,
said her husband planned to make a solo ascent of Mount Elbrus beginning
on June 14 and summit the mountain one day later before returning to
base camp Friday."

Adventurous people like the challenge. It's like jumping out of a perfectly good plane, running a marathon, sailing around the world. Climbing the highest mountain in every country is the challenge for those who climb.

Hope he is found safe.

I think that for anyone who has a passion for mountain climbing, it's a lifestyle that is understood and accepted by their inner circle. The article doesn't say one way or another, but it's quite possible that Beare's wife shared his passion and was not merely tolerant of it. His previous climbing experiences proved him to be capable, and of course nobody embarks on something like this expecting not to return. The vast majority of climbers do the climb and make it home again safe and sound. I so hope this has a happy ending.

There was another story in the news recently about a Colorado pastor who lost his life while doing a solo search in the New Mexico backcountry for Forrest Fenn's hidden treasure. My friend's husband does search and rescue in that area, and his team found the body of Paris Wallace. There hasn't been a lot of indication from this story that Mr. Wallace was experienced in the backcountry, and to me this story has more of a "why on earth would you do that?" ring to it. People misjudge backcountry dangers all the time; DH and I learned the hard way just last year how unforgiving a trail-less route through a remote canyon can be.

Wallace's story is especially tragic because it seems as though he was ill-prepared for what he attempted to do. Beare's story strikes me differently. He knew what he was doing ... but something obviously happened. And to be honest, "something could happen" on one's daily commute to the office.

The above posts all make excellent points, and I can really see both sides of this. And playing off of Ida Claire's last comment, in terms of leaving a family behind, what about spouses/parents who race cars or enter other dangerous professions?

Being the mother of a backcountry hiker and climber I may not understand it but accept it. My son has been climbing anything and everything since he was 2 years old and I think it's just innate, it becomes part of who they are and what they almost "need" to do. He leaves on Saturday for a 2 week climbing tour of the Swiss Alps. He isn't climbing any specific mountains but will be scoping them out. He sure didn't get this from his parents.

My sympathies are with this young man and his family. This is my worse nightmare.

what about spouses/parents who race cars or enter other dangerous professions?

Like firefighters or tree-trimmers or those who in the military?

An obituary in today's paper highlighted the life of a 28 year old, obviously much-loved, who fell to his death on a hike in Hawaii. Anyone here ever taken a hike in Hawaii?

It happens, unfortunately.

sushipup1, my spouse spent almost 30 years as a police officer, so I know what it feels like .. I tried not to think about it too much..

I was just raising the point about people who take recreational risks, and have young families, as the OP brought up

For some reason, this situation went over my personal comfort line and I was wondering if I was being a judgmental old lady. It's interesting to read the different responses and justifications.

My husband rides a road bike around our steep mountain canyons a few times a month. Like bfenton's son, he has an internal compulsion to physically push himself and is unhappy when he can't exercise. I'm not happy about the danger but we are financially comfortable, my kids are grown and we have good insurance. When his bike route sounds especially hazardous, I usually ask him if our disability insurance is paid up. I'm only half joking.

I've thought about the "what if's" regarding my younger brother, who has climbed all of the 14'ers and often hikes alone in very remote and inhospitable areas. Granted, he's single and does not have children, but he does have family who love him and want him to be around for many years to come. My family and I recognize that these activities are an outward manifestation of who he is at his very core. He would likely shrivel up and fail to thrive as a human being if he could no longer do these things. He does have a girlfriend, but I think part of his reluctance in making things permanent with her may have to do with his innate need to experience outdoor adventure, and fear that she will have ideas of her own in that regard. He's not going to purposely allow anyone to take that from him. I understand and respect that.

I do think it may make a difference how one feels about this, if one has a personal attachment to someone who is an adventurer. It's not just a little "hobby" that they have. It's what makes them who and what they are.

Ida, I think your brother has the right attitude. Unless two people are like-minded, extreme sports just won't work for the average couple when only one is involved.

Doing any sport, whether extreme or not, can be hazardous. Bicyclists and runners can and do get hit. Triathletes die, especially during the swim part of the tri. Hard to believe after all that training, but yes, the swim seems to be the hardest on the heart. Something to do with the stress of the swim and being in the water with a lot of people thrashing around sometimes gets to people, not drowning as one might expect.

Ida and blfenton, I think you and your brother and son, respectively, have the right attitudes, and you both do too.

I think anytime one reads of a tragic situation, the inclination is to think of it in terms of our situation and experiences. It is hard to remember that we all live unique lives and have different arrangements in our marriages.

It's sad he's missing, sure. No argument. I just think it's crappy that he left his family for the trip at all, even if there weren't a possibility of a disaster.

I suppose the couple has an arrangement of some sort and she gets to ditch him with the toddler and newborn to go African big game hunting next year....

I would prefer my DH die doing what he loved, extreme skiing, diving or climbing rather than of a stroke, cancer or car accident to work. A year into his cancer diagnosis I have learned that there are no promises that tomorrow will come. Seize this day and try not to worry about what ifs....life is short with or without risks but an unlived or unfulfilled life is sadder by far than a life ended early by living your dreams.

What roarah said. Exactly.

I am so glad I married my adventurous, paratrooper, sailboat racer, hot air balloon racer, race car driver husband over 47 years ago. Life has been great, my kids grew up strong, our union made me stronger. We are a team, even though I pick and choose which adventures I join him in.

If I had ever suggested he stop doing something he loves, he would have. But I would never take away anything that made him happy.

eta: The worse accident we ever had to endure was when he was run off the road by a semi on his commute to his office. His car rolled over 3 times. He had minor injuries.

ML

I've been thinking more about this, and I would venture a guess that many of us who are married or have a longtime partner would probably agree that the significant other engages (or has engaged) in at least some behavior of which we don't wholeheartedly approve. I'm not talking about anything illegal or immoral, but for instance I wish my DH ate less red meat and more veggies. We've discussed it. He knows how I feel about it, but he also wants to enjoy what he eats and has rationalized why he does what he does. I worry that his eating habits put him more at risk for certain diseases than I am comfortable with, but he is comfortable with his choices, and I'm smart enough at this point in my life to know when to choose my battles. (Actually, I choose them less and less these days; it's not my place to try to change anyone - much as I'd like to be able to do so at times.)

I don't think this is vastly different than having a spouse who accepts the risk of engaging in certain adventurous pursuits.

Besides, if I were to insist that my DH change his behavior to accommodate my desires, saying he's selfish if he doesn't do as I demand -- doesn't that make me selfish? I think there's a great deal of value in adopting a "live and let live" mentality -- even if that means someone we love doesn't live as long as we hope.

I don't think the people who are bothered by this situation (myself included) ever suggested that he never go climbing. Or that everyone should live their life in bubble wrap as to not hurt their family.

My issue was the timing with respect to what is going on with his family life. If he felt the need to climb, we have the Rocky Mountains just a few hours away. Yes, he could have died there as well but the search expense and logistics would have been much less complicated.

I am also influenced by his wife's frantic FB posts that show up in my feed. She is newly pregnant with a toddler and she is now trying to find her husband in the mountains of Russia. It's heartbreaking.

Gee I don't know, my husband got cancer right after our youngest was born. Timing was bad yes but would it have been less tramatic ten years later? no.

I was just thinking, irrelevant to this post,two days ago, how I detest baby on board stickers on cars for sorry being pregnant and having very young children really is nothing new nor special. It should not hinder our lives or desires it should enhance us... Many parents of young children have become too focused on the children so much so at the cost of enjoying their own lives. This child centric phenomenon comes at a great societal cost aswell in that children for the last twenty years are raised to become egocentric adults because we place so much importance on their mere existence.

This is not coming out as I hoped. It sounds harsh and I do love children and I am very sad for this young family but the loss of their dad and her husband would be no less painful in ten years' time. It is equally hard to lose a loved one while young or old is all I am trying to express. So timing means nothing if you accept the action of risk taking I guess...