Dirty Laundry

8 years ago

I have some things to say. I joined this forum because all of you seemed so real..not like other forums I lurked around. You were all helpful and kind, and I was so lonely. I've had a great time here, and I have learned tremendously from all of you. Thank You all. Maybe because I've been such a hermit all of you became too real to me, and I made you all too much of my life, and I allowed myself to share too much, but damn I had such fun here with you all. Every morning after I poured my coffee I sat down with all of you, let me tell you its been nice having someone to talk to Thank You.

The past month or so I've rubbed someone or someone's the wrong way, I don't know why, I guess that happens in life, I just never put myself in a position very darned often to have to deal with this s ort of thing in which case I don't really know how to deal with it. I actually feel ashamed and embaressed that I feel hurt on a computer.

Sparky..it didn't slip past me that you hit the *like*button when Joel showed sarcasam to me..but why..what did I ever do to you that you need to show me you don't like me..I've noticed it for awhile now. I never realized I did anything to you..

I have gotton several nice emails lately.. hate mails..i dont know from whom, but someone wants me out of here. I can only assume who sent them since i know 3 people here that have made it clear they dont like me, yet i dont know if they sent the letters or someone else. But I guess it doesn't matter. It won't change a darn thing.

And you Maylingsmom, what have I ever done to you..besides respectfully voice my opinion on a product..heck I even sent you detergent and not once other than the day you said it came did you ever mention a word about it, nothing that I ever seen.

I'm not great with confrontations..I'm way too soft, I get hurt to easily I guess when really I should get mad.

Mamapinky is saying goodbye. This isn't easy, because you are all a great group of people, but I'm not good with hurt or threats.

Thank you all for making me a part of your *Family of Friends* and like the song says *I wouldn't Have Missed it For The World*........Mamapinky

Featured Answer

recordaras

8 years ago

Yikes, mama, you really can't leave! You pretty much revived this dead forum - the last couple of weeks I could barely keep up with reading all the new threads. You have a great sense of humor and wonderful personality, not to mention the epic detergent swaps you've started.

Please don't give in to the bullies - it is only a couple of people who are probably quite miserable in real life if they have nothing better to do than be mean to strangers on the internet. The vast majority of laundry room members value what you bring and enjoy getting regular mama advice.

But at the same time if you do feel that it's better for you to cut out the negativity then you have to do what's best. Just please know that we will miss you and the forum won't be the same without you.

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Comments (69)

georgect
8 years ago
Glad you're staying!

Now go give some of that good advice the way only you can deliver it.
mamapinky0 thanked georgect
enduring
8 years ago
Goodness prevails!
mamapinky0 thanked enduring
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We just moved in our new home build a month ago & I absolutely LOVE how we did the laundry room set up. We are a family of 4 and somehow it seems like we generate enough laundry for a family twice that size! I knew something had to change in the new house because I was completely overwhelmed with the laundry room set up we had in the previous house (pretty standard setup). In the new house, we have 3 laundry pullouts--they are full size double trashcan pullouts from Rev-A-Shelf. Each can holds 1 full load of laundry for my 3.7cu ft front load washer. So we have 6 hampers/cans altogether--1 for lights, 2 for darks/colors, 1 for DH's uniforms, 1 for whites, & 1 for towels. When a hamper gets full, I just pop the contents into the washer. The laundry not only stays out of sight all the time, but it stays sorted too! If you go this route, make sure you specify the tall, full under counter height (with no space for a drawer above) trash cans. If you say 'hamper', you will get a single low hamper in each. If you just say 'trash pullouts' you will likely get the little short cans that would fit under your kitchen sink & won't hold anywhere near as much laundry. Feel free to use my pics to show your cabinet guy what you want. Like you, we're on a large piece of property & most of the time the kids are stripping down in the laundry room & then headed straight for the shower. If they are clean enough to bypass the laundry room, I have them bring their dirty clothes into the laundry room after their shower/bath and they sort their clothes themselves into the proper bins. DH & I have a hamper in our master bath--I just bring it to the laundry room every couple days & sort the clothes into the proper bins. I have a fairly simple set up & my laundry room is about 8.5' x 8.5'. My folding counter/hanging space/3 pullout hamper space is on the left as you go in, the sink is in the corner with a counter, upper & lower cabinet to the right of it, and the washer and dryer are to the right as you go in (conveniently located just across from the pullout hampers, folding counter & hanging space.) These aren't the best photos as I had to use the webcam but you get the idea--haven't found the box with the battery chargers for the camera yet! Hope these help :-) Front shot of Pullout Hampers/Trash Can Pullouts: Middle Hamper Pulled Out: Corner Sink w/ Counter & Cabinets to Right: Washer/Dryer w/ Deep Cabinets Above:
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My vote would be, maybe it's time to rethink whether you're willing to sort into hampers once you get stuff downstairs. Bcs I think that's what I'd do in your situation: one hamper per closet, so as not to take up so much space; and sort when you get downstairs. Sorting never bothered me; it would give me a chance to empty pockets, pretreat stains, turn jeans inside out, be sure knits etc., are in net bags so I don't forget to dry them, etc. It would just perhaps change the time that I do them, bcs I wouldn't need to do them right before I put them in the washer (which I'd have to do if I sorted in my closet) Then tossing a load in the wash would be fast--grab, stuff, start. It would also give me the opportunity to preSOAK stuff in OxyClean before I ran the load. Of course, I'd have to remind myself to take the laundry down more regularly.
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paloma, you *are* enabling him. If you weren't there shouldering the entire burden of his household, he'd have to do it himself, & *that's* what would make him change his routine. You don't want to enable a disfunctional system, you don't like it, but you are doing it. & you're the only one who'll stop or change what's going on: BF has no reason to change anything on your account; he has no consequences from you no matter what, while he does have consequences to fear, or at least to deal with, from his daughter's mother. It's easier to impose on you & to use you than it is to negotiate with his ex, & she's the mother of his child, so that's the way it's gonna be. No matter how bad it hurts, the only way to stop it is to... stop it. The fact that you have to ask for help, & the fact that he "helps" reluctantly & poorly, tells you that he isn't going to treat you like you're anybody important, that your role in his life is to make things easier for him in his "real" life with his ex & their daughter, & that winning & control are important to him & your happines & quality of life are not; it tells you that he views relationships in terms of winning/losing & of control. ex is winning, so he's losing with her, but at least he's got you under control, so at least he's winning somewhere... & you're losing. I'm afraid that if you stay in the relationship, you'll be the loser for the rest of your life. The real "relationship" or marriage or partnership is between him & his daughter's mother, & both of them are using you- you're the live-in help that enables both of them to continue their disfunctional relationship without the stress of actually living together. It will not get better; it will get much much worse, & you'll eventually be too exhausted & worn down to get out, & your self-confidance will be *gone*. Get out now. I wish you the best. ps: a word about "having a talk" with him. This kind of person will always "promise" to "try". & he'll be a little better for a little while, but things always revert to his old pattern. It's similar to abuse in that respect. When an abuser's victim finally cannot bear any more & decides to leave (or to file charges, or whatever), the abuser always acts remorseful & "promises" to do better, & the victim believes him, & she returns home with him, & things are better for a little while, & then the ordinary stresses in the abuser's life build up & he takes it out on her again. & again. & again. It stops when she gets away & stays away. Take care of yourself.
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It took a while to get through to my sister and her boyfriend who kept stamping their feet "it says you can wash in COLD WATER!!!", to which my response was, it say COLD water, not ICE water! Maybe in Tennessee the "cold" water meets the 75 degree requirement but not here. Especially when my water comes from deep wells. I've been using Tide Free now for years, having tried a number of other brands. If you react to Tide, you're probably reacting to the dyes and stenches rather than the soap itself. And another thing, you might not be rinsing your clothes properly. I used to react to it and quit using it but tried it again probably 10 years ago and have been very happy. My sister too is very sensitive and she didn't want to try it again until I convinced her I had to problems with it. She tried it. She loves it but is too cheap to keep buying it so she buys the cheaper stuff and complains that her clothes don't get clean enough. So I won't say more. Also I do like the pods for convenience but it's not a big deal. I got such a deal that I have enough Tide for probably another couple years. Still I've tried a couple others. Era Free (another P&G product) also has enzymes which I want, but not as many as Tide. But it's a good detergent and for most things for me worked fine. I can't deal with the stench of most laundry detergents. Really, who says April smells like THAT? Or linen? Or whatever else. I don't understand why people want their clothes to stink. To me, when clothes smell, it's time to wash them. I'm not a nutcase about "Buy American" but try to when I can and not give up things I want at least within reason. I have a couple issues with P&G but they *are* a good company with quality products so given a choice of buying overseas or here, I like to buy USA. And I know others disagree and others are hypocrites too! Just my humble opinion.
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larsi_gw
8 years ago
@MamaPinky......You damn near had me on a plane to PA... to slap you, put your soup pot back in your hand, make you some coffee, log you back into Laundry Room, put a load in your Queenie (STPP & Sodium Percarbonate naturally) and then kick back on the couch with you figuring out how to CUT anyone who sent you any kind of negative or hateful, or hurtful messages.

You are our Queen Matriarch on our Board. How utterly sad and lonely we would all be, if you left. You are strong, kind, tough, funny, loving and amazing. Ignore who ever is being mean, they are they sad, awful ones.

Like my Grandma would say...Put on your Big Boy pants and get on with it. Or as my Mom would say.....Put on your 5 inch heels and squish them!! :)

We LOVE YOU, I LOVE YOU. You are NOT going anywhere!!!!! XOXOXO
mamapinky0 thanked larsi_gw
sandy1616
8 years ago
Thinking about why I left, is Dave the Samsung guy around anymore?
clean_and_bright
8 years ago
So so happy, Mama! The laundry room would not be the same without you! I am having my cuppa coffee right now, reading GW LR...with you! Cheers to that! And please, don't let anything that happened change who you are, what you post, etc. I love that you share so much advice and your stories make it fun and welcoming. I agree with enduring, you and Larsi have brought so much lightheartedness and joy to this forum and make me look forward to testing new products and routines, etc. Life is too short, so I LOVE that we can find ways to be fully present and enjoy the simple things life.
mamapinky0 thanked clean_and_bright
mustangs81
8 years ago
I read through this thread ready to post a plea for you to stay only to find at the end that you have reconsidered!!

Relative to you and others here, I am the uninformed and in constant learning mode. I can organize and decorate a laundry room but I really need your expertise, knowledge, and enthusiasm; I mean where else would you get such enthusiasm about doing the laundry?!?!

(((Thank you.)))
mamapinky0 thanked mustangs81
enduring
8 years ago
Now, down to business... GO CUBS!
mamapinky0 thanked enduring
enduring
8 years ago
Sorry, I couldn't help myself.
mamapinky0 thanked enduring
recordaras
8 years ago
last modified: 8 years ago
sandy1616, oh god I know exactly who you mean... I don't think that he survived the switch to the new houzz platform, and hopefully we'll never see him again lol.

Welcome back mama! The JP detergent will be heading your way soon.
mamapinky0 thanked recordaras
sparky823
8 years ago
Pink: I saw the post about Cold washing last night and I thought then, If there is anything that gets her back it will be this. LOL

Now throw those pills away and replace them with something you can sniff. You will feel much better!!! Glad you are back and just for you I will never "like" another comment.
mamapinky0 thanked sparky823
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Sparky...don't even think about not *like* comments..just don't like one that is being rude to someone...and I don't mean honest criticizem... <<scrabble champ spelling again lol...

As fas as Sniffing Sparky...will a white powdery substance work...you know like STPP ...LOL...LOL.
sparky823
8 years ago
Yes I was meaning Tide Persil Ivory Snow etc. Maybe you can find you some powder Ivory at a reasonable price. But as you know, the newer stuff is nothing like the old stuff. The old stuff smelled so "baby".
mamapinky0 thanked sparky823
beaglenc
8 years ago
Having just read all of the above, what started out with dread and fear that you are leaving has turned into a big sigh of relief! I give a total ditto to what everybody has said. And I'm glad it was the meds, not that I'm glad you are on them, you know what I mean. The ole Laundry Room would be a dull and boring place without Pink.

@ Sandy, I know exactly who you are talking about! in fact I got into it with him one time.Such a smart @$$ not to mention a royal pain in one.(no LOL on that one. And @ recordaras, I too hope he does not show up on here!

So now I will have another cup of coffee, sit back, thank the Good Lord above that all is well in the Room. And @Mamapinky ((((hugs)))))
tideman_59
8 years ago
Just VERY glad that you did not let the bullies win !!!
mamapinky0 thanked tideman_59
Errant_gw
8 years ago
I was worried my silly post to you with the Tide button had upset you. I noticed your post on that thread was gone last night, then I came today and found this. I thought, perhaps, I had offended you. It was certainly not my intent, I hope you know that :)

I'm glad that you are feeling better today, and have decided to stay. I love peeking in on this forum for all of the helpful advice, and even more so to read all of the light-hearted antics. You, my dear, are a huge part of both!
mamapinky0 thanked Errant_gw
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Errant, you did nothing to upset me, and I thought the dash button was very funny.Thank you much

Thanks Tide...I'm glad to be here.
KittyCat601
8 years ago
Mama why did you delete so many posts?
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Kitty...I was leaving..and I wasn't in my right mind...you should see what I did here in my house..lmao..but little by little I shall fix my posts.
Debbi Branka
8 years ago
Glad you are staying! I just recently "met" you. Recently as in I'm on my second bag of STPP. Even my husband is convinced to use it in the laundry now :)
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Hi Debbi, I'm glad your liking the STPP..I just ordered another 20 pounds last week end. It came today lol.

Thank you Debbi
Donna-37
8 years ago
I missed your post last night and was shocked to read it this morning with my morning coffee! I Too am very sensitive and am amazed at how some people can treat others without any regard towards their feelings. I know people say to grow a thick skin but the older I get the worse it seems to get to me. In other words, I understand your hurt. I live it in real life.

I can't imagine not coming on here and spending my day with you, Larsi and the host of other very knowledgeable posters. You have just as much right to be here as anyone else!

I'm glad you changed your mind.
linus2003
8 years ago
Mamapink0 Cheryl, I read the comment last night, the one that I think made you feel like you did. I was gonna email you right then and there but could not figure out how via houzz and find your emailadress. I were trouly upset for you being hunted like that, I do not agree with the poster. I AGREE WITH EVERYONE THAT YOU ARE OUR GRAND OL LADY AND WE NEED YOU.

have loved every comment and message you sent me and I would also have hopped on a plane and hugged you because you have a good and big loving heart. There are to few people like you in the world.

PLEASE PLEASE STAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am also rather lonely eventhough I have my partner, dogs, family but I dont go to work, I have a body that dont agree with my head so comming here, posting about something close to our hearts and receving good andvice, funny stories, lovely pics gives alot of joy when you are down.

I know how it is to feel like you have felt, feel, I have been on antidepressents for 6 years now, they do another thing to and that is stop painsignals to my brain.

Al my love to you and your family from me and my family here in the south of Sweden
aamassther
8 years ago
Mamap, so glad you're back! Missed you already!

Sparky, I didn't mean to imply you were a troll. I was referring the hate mail. Really, on a laundry forum!?! Yikes!

I've always been impressed with your knowledge and straightforward posts! Sorry about that!
User
8 years ago
Mama - i told you before i had nothing personal against you. I'm sorry you chose not to accept what i said. I didn't realize this was still an issue to you. I actually have tried to stay away and not post as much because i came to the conclusion i was a problem to you. Also I' m sorry i didn't say anything about the detergent. That was an oversight on my part and was rude. But i do want to to thank you now for taking the time to send it. I am sorry to have caused you to be upset. You don't have to take my word for it but upsetting you was never my intention.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Heavens Maylingsmom..its over..when I put my hand out in friendship to you and you responded with..Lets just let it go...and something about some people just rub each other the wrong way..I did just that my dear I finially let it go.

Don't stay away from the laundry room on my account please, your no problem to me.

Maylingsmom, .....Lord forgive me....shove it where the sun don't shine

It took you how long to mention the Tide Pro I sent..an oversight on your part you say...how RUDE!!! NOW run along I have laundry to do.

By the way, it takes a lot for me to be mean to anyone but it was that OVERSIGHT that caused me to do it.
KittyCat601
8 years ago
Wow. That was super mean Mama. May didn't have to come on here and apologize but she DID.

I have something to say too. I was Letsgoblues on here. I joined recently but I have been lurking for over a year. I was very excited to be a part of this community. I was having a great time, until I posted a response to the asthma post that you made. You asked about enzymes possibly being A trigger for Chip. I suggested that you could possibly try an enzyme free detergent to see if that helps, and I even wished you the very best. Then, you ripped me a new one as if I attacked you. Strangely, your response to me is deleted, but it was extremely hurtful. At first I felt like maybe I did something wrong and apologized, but after I looked back I couldn't believe how harsh you were to me. I actually left GW and deactivated my account. After thinking about it, I decided that I shouldn't have to leave and I came back.

I understand and I am going to ripped a new one here because as soon as anyone says anything even remotely negative towards you they get attacked, but I just wanted to get that off my chest. Everyone here, you included, has something wonderful to bring to the forum and I wish all opinions and thoughts were treated equally and with respect..
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
BLue..I always liked you..Ihonestly don't ever remember being mean to you about anything at all..never..I would never have been unkind to you. But if you thought I was I'm so very very sorry. Please accept my apologies.
rococogurl
8 years ago
Late here as I've had a rolling crisis the last few days. You know @mamap that we've been having fun here and that's what this place is for. dIversion and common interests. That said, I've been around here a long time and know it can have its moments.Please dont take anything here to heart except the kindness and a good laugh. ((((((((Big hug to you))))))) Im off to the PO in the morning so you will have a prezzie to make you feel better.
suburbanmd
8 years ago
Talking online we don't have stuff like facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language to temper and modify the effect of the words. The result can be misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
As far as Maylingsmom me theres been problems please leave it at that. I am and have always been a kind person but when i go to the trouble to mail detergent to someone and 2 months later they still havent mentioned how it did nothing and than say it was a oversight ...unacceptable. im also a human being with feelings . But as far as being mean to Blue never. I would never have been mean to Blue.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Most of you know my personality well enough by now to know im not mean or a bully, im not going to defend myself anymore. But i will say i was never mean to Blue. Something strange going on here.
KittyCat601
8 years ago
Mama- I am not one to hold a grudge and I am all for forgiveness. We all make mistakes and I enjoy having you on the forum.

I just hope we all remember that we are all here for a reason - we love laundry! No matter what machine we have, what temp we wash in, what detergent or additives we use or don't use, we ALL probably have amazing laundry! Just different ways of getting there. HUGS TO ALL!! :)
KittyCat601
8 years ago
Mama- that's easy to say when you deleted your responses to me in the post titled Sparky. So much for your apology, I guess.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Blue..i dimmly remember that, i remember you aoligizing for something, i cant remember what, i will have to read back and try to remember, but perhaps it was something you misunderstood, because i dont recall you saying anything wrong. I do remember though that sometimes the way you worded things you reminded me of someone, but i never even told you that, hmmm but now more than ever you remind me of someone.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Blue i was trying to delete all my responses, but after going back so far it wouldnt let me delete anymore
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Blue, again i am sorry, you misunderstood me, besides tonight and the post you claim where i was mean to you , have you ever seen me be mean before?
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
This is silly, im not responding to anymore of this, and im not leaving the laundry room!!!
KittyCat601
8 years ago
I am not sure what you are getting at, but if you think I am someone else that really isn't my fault. I was Blues because I am a St Louis hockey fan (even though I am in Kansas).
larsi_gw
8 years ago
Everyone on here loves everyone. We are all nuts, OCD and we huff detergents (this could be the reason we are the way we are, LOL).

MamaP....you have injected life, humor, love, fun and excitement on a LAUNDRY FORUM. Just let it all roll. We all know we cannot please everyone, but you please me, and lots of us on here. Stay. Love. Laugh. Smile. Advice. Questions. Recommend. Roll your Eyes. And most importantly HAVE FUN. It's why we are all here.

Love you MamaP!!!!
KittyCat601
8 years ago
Nobody wants you to leave. We all want you to stay!
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Believe me Larsi luv, mamapinky is not leaving. Theres to much laundry to do around here, and i dont let laundry pile up. Besides whos gonna watch over all my chicks if i leave. Not to mention i have to put a stop to cold water washers..now i have to get my beauty sleep, you dont think all this awesomeness comes naturally do yo, hell i have to work at it. ROFLMAO (((((HUGS))))) to you all.
User
8 years ago
mama - I am hurt that you can't accept my apology. It was heartfelt on my part. If you had wondered about the detergent, you should have posted something and asked. I would have responded. Just as I don't know what goes on in your home, you don't know what goes on in mine. You have no way to know whether I have had things going on or not. This probably sounds like an excuse but it is not. I said it was an oversight and that it was rude and I apologized and I stand by that. It was rude. As for an issue, it is apparent from what you say that you do have a problem with me. I wish it weren't so.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
May, im going to try this again, you are hurt, as was i, Im sorry, more than you will know for my above comment, and if you look back, you wont find me being mean in the past, so i disturbed myself.

Will you take my hand in friendship, or at the very least, in peace? Someone above said when you cant see body laungage or facial expressions things can be misunderstood, their right about that, can we start over, can we have peace between each other, and learn and share from each other?

Maylingsmom, im very sorry if ive hurt you, please forgive me.
User
8 years ago
Of course, I accept your apology. I said this before in another thread and I will try saying this again -- I have never had anything personal against you and I am sorry that you felt I did. But if you have an issue with me, please don't let it build up and then say something like you posted above. I know you know how hurtful it was. Try to clear issues up before it gets to that point.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Now that being settled, have you used any new laundry products lately?
User
8 years ago
Not a thing.
User
8 years ago
I thought about giving the OxiClean HD detergent a try (if I could find it) but I have had back problems for the last week and a half and can't drive so no shopping for me. Have any of you tried it yet?
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
May, ive also been thinking of trying the Oxiclean HD, my Walmart does have it but hubs has been watching me like a hawk, lol, its not really that he tells me what i can and cant buy, but i think he associates my detergent addiction with drugs, lmao, and he wants me brought under control lol, isnt going to happen. I did do a sniff test in the store and it smells rather good, more of a clean scent.

Whats up with your back, do you have a condition that causes this or did it just start hurting, and did you see your doc? Hope you feel better soon.
User
8 years ago
My back problem is an ongoing issue. I really need surgery but trying to make it without it.
mamapinky0
Original Author
8 years ago
Oh, ya i understand holding off with back surgery, i fell out of a truck 9 years ago, it was stopped, my stepdad polished the leather seats, what a jerk, with pledge, so as i went to get out it was slippy, i tried to catch myself and twisted sidewase, i had a hernated disk, talk about pain, horriable. Its still bothers me quite often. Good luck on whatever you decide.

Dirty Laundry

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