Reading all of your posts have made me realize I am not alone in how I feel about losing my Mom.. I lost my Mom Sept 10th 2010 she died of complcations of a debilitating stroke that she had a year prior.. It was my worse nightmare her dying as when she had the stroke in 2009 she didn't really know me most of the time and she had no idea where she was or what happened to her and could do nothing for herself so really i lost her twice.. I had went to visit her the night before she had her stroke and I stayed late and she walked me to the door i can remember her waving goodbye to me how did I know that would be the last time she would do that or be the same person.. I feel guilty for leaving her that night but I didn't know this was going to happen.. I always called her every morning to make sure she was up and had ate and taken her pills but she didn't answer the phone ..I wasn't concerned as she sometimes slept late so I waited a little while and called again she still didn't answer so I called her neighbor and asked if she had seen MOm and if she would go to her apt and check on her I just was not thinking anything was wrong..Her friend did and she said Mom didn't answer the door but she said it sounded like she could hear Mom's voice.. So I got myself together and went to her apt we had a hard time getting in as she had locked the screen door. When we got in I found Mom on the floor in a sort of a twisted uncomfortable position ,I said Mom what happened do you know who I am and she said yes that I was her Mom I knew something was wrong , we called the emergency squad and they came and tried to get Mom up and to stand and her legs were like rubber and she was not speaking things that made sense the apt was a mess as she had been stumbling and falling trying to stand or get some where she had bloody bruises on her arms . We got her to the hospital and they xrayed her and ran tests she had had a very bad blood clot stroke that should have killed her they said but didn't it left her paralyzed on her whole right side and plus affected her sight as she saw double it was bad.. They told me there was nothing they could do she stayed in the hospital for 4 days and then told me I had to decide something ..I knew I couldn't take care of her by myself as I had severe back problems and she was going to need 24 hr care I had no other siblings or no other family close and my Mom nor I had the money to hire someone to help me.So against all I beleived and didn't want to do i had to put her in a nursing home something I swore i would never do .. The year I had her in there was a nightmare in itself,I had to fight with them not literally but you know what I mean to get them to take care of her right I was always upset everytime I visited her as I knew things were not right I would talk to them and ask why ,they would always blame it on some one else she had MRSA twice while she was there and an infection of the colon called C-Diff both staff infections were very contagious.. I talked to people outside of the nursing home to try to get help and called the state and couldn't get anything accomplished they don't care about elderly people and maybe because Mom was on Medicaid maybe that was not good either..It just was a living nightmare I was so upset all of the time after I would leave seeing her it affected my health and I hated seeing Mom like she was as she would not want to have lived if she knew she was having to depend on someone else to do everything for her and she was totally bedfast.. I was the only one to go and visit her as all other family was far away and the nursing home knew that and i think they took advantage of it I tried to go at different times but it didn't help it was just so hard and my husband was not a supportive person for me so i was dealing by myself which was very difficult.. She very seldon knew who I was she could talk at times and sometimes she was silent I continued to talk to her..The times she knew me and was able to tell me she loved me i will cherish in my heart..I was with her the day and through the night till the next moring when she passed holding her hand and singing to her as I always did the whole time she was in there..I would try to get her to sing with me the songs she knew to try to keep her mind alert and talking.. I just have guilt of having to put her in the nursing home and how she had was taken care I understand nursing home are short staff but I think they could do better then they do ,there were a few that really cared and did a good job but most of them could have cared less and the ones that would take the time and do a good job they would let them go so sad.. I miss my Momma so much I miss her voice being able to ask her things and hugs she was my best friend and was there when no one else was always..I feel when she died a part of me went with her there is an emptiness inside of me .. We don't know how it feels to lose a parent or anyone until we experience it ourselves.. Some people can just deal and get on with it ..Lot of people don't want to hear how you feel or what you are experienceing and we need to be able to talk about our loved one it does help.. Some days are so overwheming that I don't I am ever going to be able to deal and then a few days will go by and I am ok but My Mom is always in my thoughts each day.. I know she is by my side at times or comes in my thoughts ,I really don't think it is going to get easier the pain at times is so great..It is just so lonely at times.. It is hard to keep it all in some days I will just cry alot till its all out then i will be ok ..The strangest things will set the crying in and comes on me when I least expect.. My heart goes out to each one of you that has lost a loved one and know I understand and feel your pain.. I do know that if it was not for my faith in God I would be in worse shape then i am I know that he helps and that crying and talking about your loved one is part of the grief process.

I know they miss both dogs a lot as they won't even talk about them really. The dog will have a great home. Their dogs are like their kids and they are spoiled and loved a great deal. They are also well taken care of. Any dog that has them as pet parents is a lucky one.I assume they would just accept the dog even if it's personality was drastically different than their deceased dog. They aren't the type of people to dispose of animals that don't work out. They take care of them for life. Growing up I don't ever remember giving a cat away and I know we never gave a dog away. We always took in someone else's unwanted pet. Once a coworker of my dad's had a married daughter whose husband got her a cocker spaniel puppy from a mall petshop because it was so cute (puppy mill puppy) and once it got bigger she didn't want it anymore and they were going to take it to the dog pound. My dad volunteered to take it (we had one dog at the time as the other dog we adopted at 7 years old had just passed away) and my dad thought our lone dog would like company. This cocker spaniel was hated by our current dog! also he peed on the floor anytime he got excited or you just touched him for the first time (after you came home or he saw you) He never grew out of this. He also had very short term memory (he would challenge the other dogs (there ended up being 4 which included the two that just passed away) and the other dogs were more dominant and would have him on the floor on his back and he would still be growling and trying to establish dominance. He was a pain in the butt but my parents loved him and he had a very good life until he died at only age 5 from a seizure disorder. I just think it is strange they would want a look-alike because I would think there would be too many difficult memories and they would miss the original dog even more. I had a cat growing up that was light orange/tan and white. She was such a sweetheart. She lived to be about 15 years old. even though I've adopted several cats since then none of them are orange/tan white. I have black and white, gray and orange, dark brown and orange, solid black, gray and white, and tiger strip and a calico (I'm fostering some of these). This wasn't a conscious decision. I didn't deliberately avoid cats that reminded me of my childhood cat. I just had cats that find me or situations where I"ve taken unwanted cats and none have had the same coloring. I never really thought about it until now so it seems odd to me to seek out an animal that looks exactly like one you used to own. But your example about purebreds make sense so I guess it is not so strange.

Well, I don't know this for a fact, but whenever I read about a saintly person, I suspect that there must be SOME place they can go complain about their washing lepers' bandages, giving everything to the poor, ha! And Allyssa, you are in a very challenging situation fraught with emotion that will indeed call upon you to be a bit saintly - but the results down the road could be very rewarding. This little guy is probably going to go through harder times before things get better. To your great credit, you sound very wise in understanding that he's been through some awful stuff and he's going to have some acting out. I agree with the other posters - counseling for him and maybe the whole family would be a great start. About your baby-to-be, I don't think there is any supernatural reason why that isn't happening, but stress can supposedly make it harder to conceive. Whatever you can do to take care of yourself and to feel more at peace couldn't hurt, both in getting pregnant and having a healthy pregnancy. And whatever it takes to feel like your daughter isn't getting the short end of the stick in any way. And how are you and your DH doing? Is there a strain between you at all? One other thing strikes me about your post - your sense that you don't want to overstep the mom boundaries. That is very sensitive and perceptive. I would say that your basic stance with SS right now could be "I know I can't replace your mom, but I am a mom, and I'm here for you." And down the road, the mother-son bond may well grow. Bottom line, don't beat yourself up. You sound like you have a lot of wisdom and understanding about what your SS is going through, and the challenges to your family. Having someone to talk to is so important! Hope you get some help here. Best wishes.

I'm not against cook tops or ranges in islands, provided the island is large enough to allow for ample work space on either side of the cook top or range. Your first plan allowed for 24", about 7" more than I currently have on each side of my island cook top. I hate it with a passion because there is so little room to prep and work next to the cook top. It's one of the driving reasons for completely reworking our kitchen (remodel to start soon, yay!). And the pop-up downdraft is a joke. That said, new pop-up downdrafts are much more effective but, as has been pointed out, island venting is more expensive than perimeter venting. So I'm glad to see that your later versions moved the range out of the island and eliminated that odd sink wall jog by bumping the whole wall out. Of the 2 latest plans you posted, I prefer Option 2. There is no zone crossing between clean-up and prep/cooking functions, unlike what will occur in your Option 3. I think Option 2 could be made even better. I moved the sink out of the corner. I'm not sure what you gain by going with a corner sink, other than mirroring the other angled corner. (I have a corner sink under corner windows; I've always been happy with this set-up. The main downside is that it's very difficult to clean behind the sink.) Eliminating these 2 angled corners gains you longer stretches of counter, which is always a plus, IMO. Here are images of sinks against walls, not under windows, so you can see design options for this type of set-up. [[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/kitchens-by-julie-williams-design-traditional-kitchen-san-francisco-phvw-vp~114198) [Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by Novato Kitchen & Bath Designers Julie Williams Design [[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/kitchens-traditional-kitchen-san-francisco-phvw-vp~1994291) [Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by Los Gatos Kitchen & Bath Designers Kitchens of Los Gatos [[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/contemporary-kitchen-contemporary-kitchen-dallas-phvw-vp~574875) [Contemporary Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/contemporary-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2103) by Dallas Interior Designers & Decorators Denise McGaha Interiors [[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/island-view-traditional-kitchen-boston-phvw-vp~696524) [Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by Boston Kitchen & Bath Designers Dalia Kitchen Design btw, I made an assumption about the size of your double pantry doors, basing its width on the integrated fridge (also assumed this was 42" not 36"). If it's larger or smaller, you'll need to adjust the sink wall accordingly. Putting a range in a corner is a tricky thing to do. You have to design it very carefully to make sure it works, plus it eats up a lot of space on each wall. A 36" cook top will require 51"-54" of space from each wall. Because a range sticks out beyond the counter edge, you'll need wider spacers next to it in order to be able to open cab doors and drawers without bumping into the range. That's not saying it can't be done but you should know the pros and cons of such a set-up. Read the following articles written by Kelly Morisseau, CMKBD, for more information. A reader asks: A cooktop or range in the corner? A Design Reader Asks: Help with range in the corner? btw, the same cautions apply to placing a fridge or an oven in a corner, too. Plus, there's the awkward placement of a tall thing breaking up stretches of counter. I wouldn't do it.