It sounds like there's much more going on here than can be addressed on an internet forum. I do know that some men will drive you nuts & then tell everybody you're crazy, but I can't tell if that's what's happening with the photos & with his former flame or not. I once had a "boyfriend" (ick) who played his ex & me against each other. He was an expert manipulator, & eventually I found myself insanely jealous (not a normal state for me; I had been perfectly self-sufficient before he careened into my orbit-& I eventually became perfectly self-sufficient again, but at the cost of a lot of time, a lot of misery, & the loss of a great deal of myself). & his poor ex was in a much worse place, calling him all the time, begging for "time" with him, leaving notes on my front door. He enjoyed having two women making fools of themselves & wasting their lives fighting over him. I can't tell you what to do, but I will share with you that, if some man called me an "evil witch", I'd take that as a "I don't love you at all & I have no respect for you" statement. which means he or I would have to find another place to live. I wish you the best.

"No need to constantly be running (excuses ?) gear forgotten if all is being transported back and forth in bag." Thank you, Justmetoo! This is how it started with DH and his DD. He moved into a house just a few blocks away from BM's house. There was ALWAYS an excuse for BM to see SD when it was DH's time. It was a way for BM to still have a little bit of control over DH's house. But it evolved from dropping off or picking something up to her just not coming over because it was "easier". How does that make sense? They would forget to send her book bag when she had homework or some certain socks she needed for a concert. So it was "easy" to just drop it off or pick it up. But then, that became too hard and then it became "easier" to just have her stay home to finish her homework or it became "easier" to get her to her event if she stayed home. The definition of "easy" changed. That's why divorce papers and custody agreements are made the way they are. To give clear instructions. That way if the definition of "easy" were to change, it wouldn't change the agreement. I am a very strong advocate of sticking to the papers at almost all costs (very few exceptions). It has worked better for X and I than DH and BM. They always tried to make things "easy", but in the end they only taught her to be indecisive and he has all but lost his daughter. Love - forgetting the shin guards was a ploy on her part to have an excuse to be in another town for his practice. If they don't have any money, how does she afford the gas to be running $10 shin guards around? The restraining order is not "easy" but it is worded that way for a reason. Hitting someone is a serious thing with serious consequences. Stop letting him manipulate YOU into making things "easier" for him. Because that's what he's doing. He is manipulating you into thinking you are being ridiculous so his life can be easier. His definition of "easy" has changed. Don't let him change yours.....please.

cat38 & sweeby~ Yeah. We are all aware of the risks associated with sports. But our kids have mucho athletic prowess, so we allow them to play. As mentioned, both boys (older) played hockey and ran track. One of them broke a collarbone in hockey. The other also was into downhill skiing, but not on a team...just for fun. He broke his arm 3 times over the course of 13 years, and it wasn't even competetive. SD is actually at least as athletic as her brothers, maybe moreso, given the nature of dance. Youngest swims and dances, so no major injuries from sports yet, but she has had stitches....twice! And I suspect she'll have her own set of injuries over the years. It's part of growing up active, I guess. Sure, I'll be thrilled (and surprised!) if none of them ever get injured doing "stuff", but I don't expect that. Mom's been kept in the loop from the get-go. She not furious...she's not even a little mad. I think she knows that it's just part of the game/sport. FD, I'm glad your daughter has been so fortunate to not have any injuries. And I'll bet if you wait long enough, someone on here will suggest that you sue the pencil or paintbrush maker for your nerve damage. Or better yet, your former art teachers for not teaching you proper technique for positioning yourself to prevent injury while painting. (sarcasm intended) Now for the good news: SD saw ortho/sports med guy today. He thinks she will heal well with proper rest and immobilization, and without needing surgery. He agreed that the cast shouldn't have been removed by the trainer, but said that no harm was caused. He (the doctor) removed her cast today and put her in an ankle immobilizer that she can adjust as she heals...and take off for showers. No v-ball or dance for at least another month (so, v-ball is done), and crutches for now. He's going to see her again in a couple weeks. She's still going to see the ankle guy Monday. So, hopefully, she's on the mend... And she's going to help with the musical tomorrow, as planned. She'll be taking tickets at the door, sitting in a tall chair....

Okay, you all have probably saved my marriage. If DH had come home to me holding a paintbrush anywhere *near* those cabinets, he would have flipped. Since I hadn't planned on doing a glaze, I was quite the taskmaster when he was painting them. I made him wipe off and re-do a few areas because there were imperfections in the paint. I kept telling him that they had to be darn near perfect, b/c there would be no glaze to hide any of the rough spots. A few times, I swear I saw a flash in his eyes that told me he was about ready to turn that sprayer on ME. He came through, and the finish is like glass. We've even had professional painters come in and comment on what a good job he did. Imagine all of his hard work hidden under a golden yellow glaze..... I'm likely going to do yellow cabs, but in the pool bathroom. Right now they're 70's brown, and they'd be stunning painted a soft yellow with a glaze. It'll scratch that itch for me, and I can be true to my original vision for the kitchen. Thank you ALL so much for your perspective and words of wisdom. I actually learned alot about myself (and the ridiculous need to re-do things) by reading your responses. I feel I may be just a bit more balanced now! LOL!! Love-my-lil, Your post made me crack up. You're a hoot! And my roots are getting a bit long....time for a trip to the salon! Laura, DH used a Wagner paint sprayer (bought JUST for this project....another reason he'd kill me if I sullied up his paint job!). The cabinets had already been painted, but they were discolored and smoke-stained. We cleaned them with TSP, primed with Sherwin Williams Prep Rite Bonding Primer (made specifically for adhering paint to glossy surfaces..it's spendy, but it's amazing stuff!), then sprayed 2 coats of Sherwin Williams latex paint. We didn't want the mess/smell of oil. Patricia, I bought the valance (of all places) at Home Depot. It was only $17.50. I was shocked when I pulled it out of the package and it was *exactly* what I'd had in mind to make. I couldn't have even bought the fabric for $17.50! Of course, adding my frou-frou fringe upped the total cost, but I'm a fringe kind of girl. :)