Sorry - I think most moms, stepmoms and anyone who's ever raised children can sympathize. Get some rest - enlist the heip of someone, anyone you can trust to give you a break for a little while and things will seem much clearer when you wake up. What does the psych. say about your DD's behavior? Maybe she needs a little one-on-one w/ you for a day?

I'm a dentist - tell me about the tooth. Sharp pain, dull ache, throbbing? Filling in the tooth? If so, is it large? Pain only to biting or release of biting? Sensitive to hot and/or cold? When's the last time you had it x-rayed? Last cleaning? Take ibuprofen if you don't have an ulcer or any reason you can't take it. Double the over-the-counter 200mg dose and you'll have the prescription strength dose of 800 mg. 600-800mg of ibuprofen (taken w/ food) will take the edge off.

Good luck,
Dana

Dana-
I didn't even have to ask, as soon as my hubby got home he told me to go take a nap and he'd get dinner started...He's such a sweetheart...I needed the rest, it really helped. Psych says that she is having a hard time with her dad's recent appearance and "disappearance".He was gone for 2 years and then came back, took me to court for visitation then agreed to going to therapy with her to rebuild the "trust".Until his fiancé' called me one day and informed me that they "couldn't afford the sessions anymore because she was pregnant with his child, and she had 2 kids of her own who depended on his income as well".So basically he ended the therapy, and told me he wasn't doing it anymore...The therapist then told him that he would have to go back to court then because she would not agree to him taking my daughter without completing the therapy he had agreed to in the first place. His response to that? He took off again-so we haven't heard from him in over 2 months now. Needless to say my daughter is heartbroken, and keeps his picture by her nightstand. She gazes at it every night until she falls asleep. I don't know who is hurting more-me watching her suffer, helpless to make the pain go away, or her....
I am planning to spend some time with her tomorrow,I know she wants me to spend some one on one time with her-she asked me to play with her earlier but I told her I couldn't because my tooth was hurting.

Thanks for so much for your suggestion!!! I took the double over the counter IBU and some warm salt water rinses which really helped, so for now IÂm ok. Its a dull ache on the top left right side molar. Yes there was a big filling, which fell out when I was eating a barbecued corn on the cob last night. It only hurts when I bite down-so I am just avoiding that side altogether. Honestly, I haven't been to see the dentist in over 3 years.I know i have to go,i just never get around to going-(my mom reminds me every time she comes over)Since she knows i have this horrible fear of going...when I was 7, my dentist had to do an extraction and he told me that it might leave a hole in my cheek!(just out of curiosity,is that even possible?)Well i swear I didn't sleep for the entire week before the appt. I cried and begged my mom not to make me go almost every night. The day of the appt my mom had to literally "drag me out of the car" into the office...It was all really traumatizing. Ever since that, IÂve been afraid of going. When I have gone, I've felt like I was 7 all over again.
Thanks again=)
Dcubana

Wow, so sorry to hear about your ex reappearing just enough to cause a lot of confusion, during a very difficult time, anyway, then drifting off indefinitely....your poor little girl. Sounds like you're both better off w/o him. Is his picture beside her bed her idea? She seems so young for that, but maybe it was a habit from when he first left?

Anyway, the tooth either hurts because the dentin is exposed from the lost filling, it's cracked (sometimes happens w/ a large filling) or there was decay under the filling (hence it was soft on the foundation and that's why the filling fell out) possibly encroaching on the nerve. Get it looked at. Today's dentistry is a far cry from that of our youth. They have many oral sedatives that can make appts. a breeze these days, providing you have a driver for you afterwards.

Good luck,
Dana

I think we are definitely better off without him in our life. Especially after getting a glimpse of what his fiancé was like. I cringe at the thought of having to send my little girl to visit him twice a month. I don't think I would have had a moment of peace. Can you imagine? She's pregnant, and has two kids of her own. Here comes my daughter who hasn't seen her daddy in two years and all of a sudden she has to share "him" with 4 other people! My god...it would have been an absolute nightmare. So I can't say that when he left I wasn't "relieved" in that sense. But it was also really hard. I was a mess after that last session, since i knew that i was going to eventually have to try to explain to my daughter he was gone again.He actually tried to blame me for wanting to "keep our daughter" away from him.He even started crying. But IÂm glad that the therapist was there to point out to him that it was his choice to end therapy, therefore it was "his choice" to not see his daughter anymore.

The whole thing with the picture was actually my idea. When she first started seeing her dad again-she was ecstatic! I mean I hadn't seen her that happy in months. After everything that had happened, I couldn't be happier myself to see her so cheerful every day. So during one of his visits/sessions the therapist took pictures on her cell and emailed me them. I thought it would be nice to print them out and frame one for her, since she started to express worries that he would leave again....So here I am, wanting to smash that frekin picture to smithereens every time i go inside her room. I had thought of hiding it, but the therapist told me that it would be a bad idea. I dunno, it seems like having his picture there is like a "constant" reminder that he left her again...so how is that any good? "Damned if I do, damned if i donÂt"
I just wish I hadn't given her the stupid thing in the first place.
-Dcubana

The fiance, who is responsible, along with your ex-husband, for making your daughter miserable by taking her father out of her life after his reappearance, may be calling you a "crazy bio-mom" for not "allowing" visitation without completion of the therapy - ignoring the fact that the therapist is insisting on continuation of the therapy, etc.

I agree that it is not good for your daughter to have to share her father with four other people, one of whom is selfish and at least one other of whom will be very needy by virtue of being an infant, especially after he had recently reappeared in her life.