Storage is a problem, especially when the house is small. Our house is single wall construction (vertical one inch thick boards where the outside of the board is the outside of the house and the inside of the board is the interior of the house - it works best in warm climates), however, when we remodeled the bath house (a separate building since the house didn't originally have plumbing) we put in "double wall" (2" x 4" stud) construction. I have found that canning jars fit real nice on shelves set between the studs. Loads of storage space is hiding in the walls. If you have any, tear out some of that drywall, put shelves in the wall and then new drywall panels hinged to hide with push latches or cabinet doors set into the wall. Presto! Instant invisible storage. I'm also planning on building a cabinet to fit the bigger pickle jars used for dry storage since those jars are too big to fit anywhere else. Since our house is old, the traditional "pie safe" style of cabinet is easy to build and fits right in. We also have earthquakes, so having the jars hide behind cabinet doors improves their survival rate. My friend strung wires across her shelves and her canned goods survived the last 6.7 earthquake. The wires aren't very visible and about two or three inches from the shelf. She said if the wires hadn't been there, she didn't think there would have been anything left on the shelves at all.

So many posts it may already have been said but... redroze, I like your thought about the candy jar because what I hear is this: if the comments are just snarky because lots of people (me!) feel insecure about our own messiness, you can't fix that. On the other hand, likely you do ( seeing as how you have friends over and are not a hermit) want to have a WELCOMING kitchen. So that is more of trying to please others when you are in the role of hostess, and certainly there are many ways to do that, some small touch that says, come in, sit down (or stand up!), I'm glad you're here. If it is possible to tell the difference--between something that someone is foisting on you as a control or jibe thing, vs. intentionally planning a little something that says welcome--then it seems the latter is where a lot of us would like to be. For example, the reverse is ,a kitchen or home that is really too messy, say, to sit down without squashing something or knocking things over or getting some undefined goo on oneself--that's not welcoming, either, but again, if someone drops in, so be it. I read some glossy magazine article by some experienced or well-known "hostess" about little touches for parties, and instead of it sounding nutso (like, "first create your own hand-made paper and then spend 5 days making individual origami party favors" ) , there were very good, small simple things that seemed to have good track record and are easy. I'm not saying you need to change anything at all, especially not saying that one has to be perpetually prepared with candles and a dish of nuts for a member of family or close friend dropping in --I'm just saying I liked your attempt to think, what might draw someone in, say "treat yourself here " and still be simple and neat.

I'll ask DH to pick up some "Cackle Berries and Moo Juice" once in a while. I love the "white wash" name for skim milk, especially since that's what I have to drink. I make a lot of one-pot dinners, too. I've taken to making "Chicken Stuff." I'll take left-over roasted chicken, add celery, onions, carrots, and anything else that's in the fridge and cook until the veggies are done. Plop it on some brown rice and call it dinner. I've made it several times; each time it's different. I don't eat meat like I use to. I'm not a vegetarian as such, but I seem to have lost my taste for most meats. So, I tell Wes I'm making "roasted beast" or cooking a "hunk of dead animal" for dinner. Doesn't seem to bother his appetite. I think Macaroni Screw-Up will be on our table soon!

I don't know people who only sit for a couple of days. As I said, different groups have different customs. "Shiva" is a form of the number seven which refers to the length of the initial period of mourning observed by the close family. There are many stages of the mourning process. After the first seven days are the thirty, and then the eleven months. Unless they're close to the family, the same people don't necessarily come every day of the seven, but enough people to conduct a service will come every day, so the services and mourner's prayers can be said in the home. If there aren't enough people, the neighbors will come over for the services. If the mourners are close enough by to get there in time, you just show up every day. Even though there isn't always a meal, per se, someone will put out some of the food that has been brought, since eating together is an important ritual. It's also easier for those in deep mourning if the food just appears, and someone hands them a plate, rather than having to organize meals and worry about feeding guests. People in mourning will also gather to eat during the extended mourning period, but won't attend parties and other revelry. Continuing into the longer periods, we support them with food and with invitations to meals. The salmon salad that I can't look at without wondering who died is really the kind of thing one takes on that first day. Besides being neither milk nor meat, it's made with canned salmon and staple ingredients like celery, and doesn't require shopping. Since the funeral is usually the day after the death, and always no more than three days, that's a consideration.