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maggie2094

I Feel Bad About My Neck

17 years ago

I feel bad about my neck. - Nora Ephron

I have fair skin and have always had neck lines but now as I age, they seem more there. My darker complected friends don't have this issue.

Also my skin. Oh, my skin. I have small pock marks on my face from when I was younger and had a bike accident on a gravel driveway. They had to remove all the gravel from my face with surgical instruments. They have not been that noticeable until recently! They are becoming more pronounced and I can't figure out make-up. How do you adjust your make-up as you age?

I heard Diane Sawyer say no powder, it sits in the lines...but creme blush seems to do the same...

Sigh.

I have forehead lines, too. I am glad they curve up. That means I have smiled a lot, right:D? I am okay with aging, like my Aunt says, the alternative is not so hot!

There are worse things, of course. But I am feeling bad about it and I am so tired of seeing celebrities with no lines and then photoshopped beyond recognition in magazines. I avoid looking in the mirror too much. It feels depressing.

What gives skin the best appearance?

Comments (24)

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    First of all, stop looking at celebrities. Some things are beyond our reach.

    I feel bad about my neck, too. (Isn't that book funny?)As I said in my other posts, I have been looking for new glasses and the worst part is having to look at myself and how I've aged.

    If you want to get rid of those marks, you might consider laser therapy, although it is expensive. Another option is microdermabrasion. I'm not sure there is anything you can buy to cover them and heavy make-up looks awful as we age.

    As far as over the counter stuff, I really like Clinique products. I use their Soft Finish foundation. I have skin very much like yours, thanks to my Welsh and German ancestors. I find this foundation doesn't sit in my lines and has a bit of moisture.

    I have faithfully used moisturizer all my life. Since my skin is dry, it feels good. I know there are fancier and more expensive ones, but I have always liked Olay. I use the regular with SPF15.

    Go have a consultation with one of the makeup ladies in a department store. Although I like Clinique, I think the Chanel salespeople are the best trained. It's worth buying a few of their products to get the advice.

    I plan to have my neck lifted one of these days. Some of my friends say I'm nuts. Maybe I am but I don't like seeing that crepey neck. I think other people are nuts for the things they spend money on. We're all crazy in our own way!

    I've noticed that my dark-complected friends tend to get saggier with age, like under the eyes. I have more fine lines than they do. So -- no one escapes the ravages of age!

    Just remember -- we're all in this together.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I love, love, love philosophy!

    I faithfully use purity, hope in a jar, & the microdelivery (2 piece set).

    I'm a natural strawberry blond with very fair skin so have your same problems. I could tell a difference in my skin within a week of starting philosophy & after six months it took five years off.

    /tricia

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  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    This year I'll be 50 (GAKKK!!!)

    I don't leave the house without full makeup on, and that's been since I was a teenager. Looking back, I believe that my attentiveness to my skin has helped the way I look today, which is younger than I am.

    The best things to do for your face and neck - stay out of the sun or wear sunscreen and/or hats and sunglasses. Don't smoke, don't drink to excess. Stay hydrated.

    Cleanse gently but thoroughly. Exfoliate the dead skin off. What works best for exfoliation? A salicylic or retinyl acid cream will loosen it up. Then use a warm hand towel to gently scrub away dead skin. Use a night cream. Use an eye cream (I use eye cream on my upper lip as well). Don't forget your neck and upper chest.

    Makeup? Okay, here are my opinions on that:

    Don't use greasy, oily makeup. I use very little foundation, mainly Bare Minerals (me and Woodie have been using it for a few years), and I carry a compact of Shiseido or Estee Lauder sponge-on foundation for touch-ups and after sports.

    Don't cover your whole face with foundation, just use it lightly where you need to even out skin tone. Foundation should make neck lines look less noticeable. Stay away from pressed powder. It clogs your pores and most of them instantly age you. I've never used powder for that reason until I found Bare Minerals Tinted Feather-light Mineral Veil loose powder. It has a subtle sparkle to it also.

    Apply foundation and other makeup with a brush or sponge, and keep those tools clean.

    Don't make up the bottom eyelid - no liner, shadow or mascara there. That ages you.

    Do use neutral brown eyeshadow between the eye crease and brow. Use an eyeshadow with a subtle sheen. Flat matte powder ages you. Same with blush. We need that subtle sheen, and it reflects away from any pockmarks if you have them.

    Use eyeliner on the upper eyelid. Most pencil eyeliners are hard - they drag your skin. We don't want that. Use a softer, no sharpener-needed pencil, like Revlon ColorStay, or if you know how, use liquid or pot eyeliner with a brush. Use it liberally, don't be shy.

    We lose our eyebrows and eyelashes as we age. Use a brow filler pencil or powder to fill in the bare spots and extend your brows. Instantly younger! Use mascara or wear false eyelashes. I don't yet, but if I lose my lashes I will.

    Don't use thick, color-infused lipstick - it instantly ages you. Use lip glosses instead, in shades just darker than your natural lips, and if you need it, use a neutral pink lip liner pencil - lightly!

    Stay with pink-tones. Pink is youthful. No red lipstick or blush. No brownish, orangey, muddy shades. If you are ruddy, use a yellowy tone or colors made for ruddy complexions.

    Here's what I'm using for skincare right now:
    Shiseido white lucent foaming cleanser and toner.
    Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair (I've been using this for many years and I use it night and day).
    Estee Lauder Diminish retinol treatment at night.
    Shiseido Bio-performance eye cream - a girlfriend's gift. Before this I used Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair Eye Recovery Complex.
    Clinique Moisture Surge Gel. I love this stuff.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Gina, I have seen your pictures from your recent trips in the gallery area, and I cannot believe you are turning 50! You look about 28-32! Seriously! I am not saying this to garner any type of favor LOL. I just am being totally honest. You look half your age! That is just great! Take care, Duane

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I love my Obagi skin care system. I realize it is expensive but the next time you see me you will see the difference. I turned 50 this year and decided to treat myself to what is called 3D Rejuvenation and to upgrade my skin care to Obagi. Eight weeks ago I started a treatment plan that is called 3D Skin Rejuvenation by Cutera. This week is a good week...I'm peeling SHEETS of skin off my face. I'm watching the wrinkles get finer and finer. The red and brown spots are disappering and pore size is decreasing.

    You really need to commite yourself to this skin care system because you go through 12 weeks of crazy looking skin. I'm red and peeling all the time right now. Although in another 4 weeks I'll be through the worst of it and on my way to better looking skin. My skin will continue to look better and better for the next year.
    Living in the south and being a gardener has taken a toll on my skin...I'm just trying to reverse some damage that I have.

    I really don't have an interest in this company...just some experience with soooooo many different products that never worked for me. Finally, I'm happy with this one. I'll use this skin care system forever now.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Obagi

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    This is a very timely post, as this winter my skin had erupted. Pre-menopause is becoming like puberty. It's not really acne I have, it's just redness, blochiness, and all around crankiness my skin seems to have. It just seems to be irritable--red bumps, etc. I am fair skinned too. I have huge pores and my skin is oily in the T spots. I need to start some kind of skin routine other than just washing it, which has been my skin routine for 30 years. I can't afford expensive products, I'm looking for something cost effective. I'm using a face wash with salicylic acid, but I would like to try some kind of retinol creme/lotion.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    At this point I feel bad about everything between my forehead and my ankles. Those two places are holding up pretty well!

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Wow Gina, lots of good advice there!

    Me I'm a big fan of overnight moisturizing, I slather up at least a half hour before bed so it can sink in my skin not the sheets. I love Noxema, I have always had marginally bad skin so scrubs are out of the question, Noxema just makes me feel super clean, a nice cold water followup splash and I feel like my pores are slammed shut. And I'm another believer- like Woodie and Gina - of mineral makeups.

    I'm now older than when I started this post.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Maggie, I'm no help at all. I've spent my whole life washing my face with Dial soap and when I was a teenager I used Noxema as a moisturizer but I've switched to Olay with a sunscreen. My boss took me last year for a facial on my birthday. It was the first time I'd ever had a facial, and I turned 53. The "technician" said my skin was really good, I have one mole and I should use a toner for my pores but no other advice.

    Fortunately my skin is very oily so I've gotten away with few wrinkles, but my neck is starting to get a bit "saggy". Ashley says when she gets a job making a ton of money she'll pay for me to get it "done". LOL

    So there's your answer. Put your kids to work, when they make a lot of money they can pay for all your skin care!

    I do think we need to change our makeup routines as we age, I see women my age with that "layer" of make-up, it makes them look like they've spackled their wrinkles. Add too much eye make up and they just look ridiculous. How do you avoid this? Darned if I know, I think you should listen to Gina!

    Annie

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I don't wear but a teeny bit of spackle these days. I never wore much as I have never liked the way it feels. Like Annie, I have oily skin. I love, love Retin-A. I try to pamper my neck with lots of moisturizer but mostly I try not to look too closely. ;)

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Thank you all or the advice and the camaraderie. It just sort of "shocking" to age sometimes:)

    Pam, someone else suggested microdermabrasion. I will have to ask my dermatologist. Wonder if it is covered...doubt it but I still want to learn more. My friend is a chemist for Clinque and way back gave me products but they just never "agreed" with my skin. BTW - love the glasses, girl! The color is a nice surprise on the sides. Cool beans.

    Tricia, another philosophy girl. Have used it for a few years but I sort of feel like I need more. The Hope in a Jar moisturizer seems to be just sitting on my face now. I was looking at the microdelivery. Might try to get some samples of it.

    Gina, Great tips! I have been wondering about Bare Minerals for a while now. So true about liners dragging the skin. I have no prob with the pot liners. Love them. But, really? Nothing on the bottom? bummer! lol I did try fake eyelashes for a wedding I had to go to! OMG! They are so awesome and what a difference they make. I don't wear make-up that much these days so I feel like I lost touch when I do want to...but now I am really finding I need to or I'm gonna scare people. My skin is so uneven and ick. I am totally a gloss girl, though. Never lipstick. Have you noticed actresses, newscasters, etc having very pink almost shiny cheeks lately? I want to know what they are using? It looks so pretty. My eyelashes and eyebrows are also really fair. I did have my lashes dyed with henna over the summer and my eyebrows dyed. It made a big difference making my skin look better. Why is that?

    River, I had a spa treatment day recently and they sold that line. They had me sold on it but not in the budget right now! It was nice...and so was the spa day which was a gift. Sigh.

    Lpink, exactly! I feel like my skin is cranky! I am also getting weird dry patches I never had before:(

    Sands, okay. You, the woodster, and Gina all for the mineral make-up. It seems like every line offers it now. Does it have to be bare minerals, or any one?

    Barnmom - LOL, and Annie - LOL!!!

    It's just weird how it just seemed to happen overnight - lol.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Maggie have you ever seen the eyebrow 'mascaras' in Ulta or Sephora? They have temp dyes for your brows that work so well! Having a definitive outline that draws your eye can definitely make your skin look better in comparison.

    I had late onset melasma - a blotch fiesta on my forehead and upper lip that I never expected. We all have issues to deal with I guess.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Lots of companies have jumped on the mineral makeup bandwagon. Careful - many of these are just re-packaged pressed powder formulas if you look at the ingredients. Bare Minerals foundations has only 5 ingredients - all minerals, one of which is a natural sunscreen ingredient.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    No, Sands! Get out! I wannit:D I'm ascared to go into Sephora, though. I love that place but can't be spending too much now. But, I do think they sell Bare Minerals, now, too...

    Gina, I was wondering because my friend had the Loreal one and I tried it and it just felt like regular powder. I thought no way could it just be like that! I thought Bare Minerals had a try me thingie on Qvc...I thing qvc...I wonder if they are the best deal.

    I do think I also need to do the night moisturizing.

    When my Dad's girlfriend was visiting - she had a skin care line - forget the name - she said it was from Costco! It was so nice on my skin. I loved it! I don't do Costco, anymore though.

    Notice how I am sampling? lol

    Did I mention my hands? Sigh. Out of no where. I have like lumps in my veins.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I've got the wrinkly neck thing going too. I realized last year that wearing turtlenecks was no longer an option as it just sort of pushes all the saggy skin together and might frighten young children!!!! Thank goodness I live in the deep south!

    RR, I tried Obagi about 7 years ago and NEVER got past the red stage.... I was using it with Retin A and I guess I just couldn't handle it. Gave up after about 5 months.

    Gina, great advice. I've got to use some mascara on my lower lashes though. I guess it all depends on your eye set and shape. Now that my upper lids are sort of caving down over my eyes, the bit of lower mascara is about all that you can see of my eye makeup!

    All the same, I wouldn't want to be a teenager again for anything. I do like this stage of life even though I see my mother looking back at me in the mirror! Oh well, I do miss her now that's she's gone, so maybe that's not such a bad thing.... and hey, I think I see my dad again in my "veiny" hands!!! It's one way to keep their memories alive!

    Grace

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    You are all far more cheerful than I feel about this aging thing. Ugh. Denial is sort of working for me. People who like me tell me: you don't look 53. What I think they really mean is: you don't act your age. ;) I had a reality check from the dryer repair guy who guessed my age at 56 on my recent birthday. Double Ugh. I wasn't wearing any makeup, though.

    Grace, I know what you mean about seeing your mother in the mirror. Not a good thing for me on a number of levels!

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Well, I got proofed at an REO Speedwagon/Heart concert this summer:D Okay, so the kid serving the beer was like 10...whateves..heee I'll take it! Of course, he also called me Ma'am.

    I hate when people say "you look tired" and your not. Aren't they really saying you look like crap?

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    RR, let us know how you like the results - I've been afraid of deep peels, laser treatments and such but my most worrisome beauty thing is some age spots on the left side of my cheek (the driving window side).

    Maggie, the celeb shiny face thing is due to fillers. It's weird. Some of them have completely shiny faces, like melting wax.

    As for no eye makeup on the bottom lid - my advice is general and YMMV (your mileage may vary), but it's what I've noticed.

    Here's a tip for photos of hands - to get the bulging veins smooth, lift your hands over your head for a minute before you have a pic taken. The blood rushes out of your hands and they look smoother.

    Wait for QVC to have a special on Bare Minerals - they will usually have a getting started package for half price or so during the special. I bought 2 sets last time. You can sign up on the QVC web site to have notices emailed to you about certain items and when they will have shows on them. (Ain't technology great?)

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Grace,I hope not to be red for any longer than 6 months. The Retin-A is mixed with a blender and it seems to calm it down some. I've done Retin A in the past but not with a blender. This is better. I'm thinking some of the red is coming from the three different lasers that they are using.I'm now at week 8 and alreasdy some people have noticed the smoothness and healthy glow. My goal is not to wear any foundation ever again.

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Threr was a piece on Good Morning America this morning and the dermatologist they had as a guest gave some great advice. The topic was winter skin care but they also talked about best ways to improve your skin. There was a list of recommended products, too. Here's the link. I think I will try some of these. She really recommended fractal laser treatments for spots and evening out scars.

    She also talked a lot about anti-oxident use.

    I tried Retin A once but it honestly made me feel a little ill from the "burned" skin.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Dermatologist on GMA

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    The advice I finally got from someone other than the dermatologist who was selling the Obagi/Retin-A combo was that some people especially fair skinned types who spend a lot of time outside just can't handle the retin-A. I fell into that camp.... even with using sunscreen religiously, it is just too much for me. I trail ride on the horses and that will sometimes be 4-5 hours of cold wind in my face. Between riding and gardening, the advice I've gotten is not to thin my skin with the RetinA or I might cause more problems than it would fix.
    I splurged about 4 months ago and had a facial.... now I'm hooked and am going every month for a deep pore cleaning. No peels or anything, just a good cleaning and some masks and hydration. My skin glows for days.

    I know that one of my problems is not drinking enough water. I think I'm constantly dehydrated.

    Grace

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Retinoids are the ONLY thing that will actually reverse skin damage. And you really don't need expensive products to keep your skin looking great. I've gotten a ton of really useful information from this site. You do have to register to read the reviews. Their boards are also great. Good luck!

    Here is a link that might be useful: Makeup alley

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    lpinkmountain

    I wonder if you might have rosacea. (By the way, please forgive me...I'm not a dermatologist at all but just am someone who all of a sudden developed a kind of blotchy bumpy skin.) When I went to the dermatologist for my yearly check up (I've become really good about this), she told me that I have rosacea. If that's the case with you, there are very specific things that should be used on the skin and equally specific things to avoid.
    Actually, I've saved money on skin stuff because the dr. told me that the best cleaner for my skin is Cetaphil (cheap) and that the Oil of Olay products are good as well. Her comment was that they have good chemists working for them. I'm to avoid Retin-A (boo hoo) and to wear a really good sun block. Vanicream (another cheapie) sunblock was also recommended. I don't wear much makeup but did have a couple of Bobbie Brown products left over from my daughter's wedding a few years ago. The doctor told me that those were OK to use because there wasn't anything in them that shouldn't go on the face.

    Good luck.

    Regarding skin, I figure that my eyes are getting worse just at the right time because I can't see all of the imperfections without my glasses. So...I just don't wear them!

  • 17 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Yeah, I did have rosacea, which does tend to flare up in the winter. I tried all kinds of doctor prescribed lotions for it, just made it worse. It went away on its own. I think there is definately an immune system connection to some of this stuff. Also I'll bet I don't drink enough water. I really have to force myself to drink water.

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