jewels- I assume you are actively dealing with the identity theft because it can cause many long-term problems. A while back a friend passed on some useful information concerning what to do in case of loss of a wallet or purse. I'm sure you have done all this, but I thought I'd post it to help others who are in the same situation: WHAT TO DO IF YOU LOSE YOUR PURSE OR WALLET We've all heard horror stories about fraud that's committed using your name, address, SS#, credit, etc. Unfortunately I (the author of this piece) have firsthand knowledge, because my wallet was stolen last month and within a week the thieve(s) ordered an expensive monthly cell phone package, applied for a VISA credit card, had a credit line approved to buy a Gateway computer, received a PIN number from DMV to change my driving record information online, and more. But here's some critical information to limit the damage in case this happens to you or someone you know. As everyone always advises, cancel your credit cards immediately, but the key is having the toll free numbers and your card numbers handy so you know who to call. Keep those where you can find them easily (having to hunt for them is additional stress you WON'T need at that point!). File a police report immediately in the jurisdiction where it was stolen, this proves to credit providers you were diligent, and is a first step toward an investigation (if there ever is one). But here's what is perhaps most important: call the three national credit reporting organizations immediately to place a fraud alert on your name and SS#. This will help prevent identity theft, which can be a much bigger headache than all of the other stuff combined. I had never heard of doing that until advised by a bank that called to tell me an application for credit was made over the Internet in my name. The alert means any company that checks your credit knows your information was stolen and they have to contact you by phone to authorize new credit. By the time I was advised to do this - almost 2 weeks after the theft all the damage had been done (there are records of all the credit checks initiated by the thieves' purchases, none of which I knew about before placing the alert). Since then, no additional damage has been done, and the thieves threw my wallet away this weekend (someone turned it in). It seems to have stopped them in their tracks. The numbers are: Equifax 1-800-525-6285 Experian (formerly TRW) 1-800-301-7195 Trans Union 1-800-680-7289 Social Security Administration also has a fraud line at 1-800-269-0271

You've cleaned out your internet files, your temporary files, cleared history, and cookies and then changed your addy? Then reboot and when you come back you will have to log in. Sue

"To make a short story long :) my point is this thread has been to identify my personal responsibility in this situation. Have I contributed to the negativity? Was I showing condescension in the email without realizing it? What are my obligations to stay in contact with my sister? Have I been insensitive? Have I been TOO sensitive? In other words, is there any chance that changing myself would make it possible for me to have a harmonious relationship with her?" This implies that you still think her reactions are based substantially on your actions -- which, in a typical relationship, they would be. Normal people interact. So normally, there's reciprocity, a give and take. Kindness is met with kindness, hostility with hostility. Conversations meander down a natural path directed more or less equally by both people. But narcissists don't work that way. They have their own agendas and scripts based on their own needs, and if you don't follow their scripts, you are 'breaking their rules' and will always be punished - get a negative response. Narcissists use other people to meet their own needs, and the number one rule for dealing with a narcissist is this simple: If you aren't useful (as a source for whatever the narcissist needs), you are useless! (with all the scorn that word implies) "I accept that she is that way and try to refrain from making judgments. I simply separate myself from the situation since it serves no good purpose to remain engaged." Perfect! Just remove yourself emotionally from the interaction. Pleasant but superficial responses are generally safe. Some benign flattery every so often. But no soul-searching conversations, no striving for a deeper emotional connection, no revealing of sisterly secrets...

Kath, glad you got your email back. About Firefox 10.0.2. Is that what you had, or did you update it along with Thunderbird? Wondering what caused your problem. I don't know whether to get the update or not. I'm sure Alex will do well on the test. OJ, I had that same problem with Gmail. I use Yahoo now. There is a definite Love-Hate relationship with our computers. Sue