Petalique, wow. Great question . I never thought of that. Hope we get the answer.

ETA: Just asked DH what he thought about this which is the sort of thing I often wonder about. He said maybe take a photo on your phone, so you could show it to the hospital, doctor, etc. That sounded pretty good to me. He also mentioned doing the same with your attorney's name and number.

Many states have an advance health care directive registry where a digital copy can be stored. However, an emergency room or EMT probably won't check those as their first move is to preserve life.

Having an emergency contact on your phone is the best solution and that contact should have copies of your directives, MPOA, etc.

The original can be stored in your safe or even in a fireproof container at home.

The hospital in your area, your doctor would be the first place I would file such a document. After that short of a medical ID bracelet you have no assurance emergency personnel will have the time to look for said document ANYWHERE. Even driver's licensences with organ donation on them are over ridden by family initially in certain instances.

I like the idea of having a signed copy at home and on the phone, and same for advance directives. Maybe notarized if possible.

My experience with my father and now my mother is that it’s a pretty fragmented system, even within the same hospital. Always filling out the same stuff. But I’ll also say I’ve found it to be pretty casually handled. I say I’m the proxy and that seems to be good enough; I’ve never been challenged on it. Come to think of it, I don’t actually know if I’m officially named on anything beyond forms that I myself filled out for them.

Oh it's so annoying. I can't get at DH's Rx orders on a phone call. They say I have to fill out a form, but then they can't check to see if the form is there unless they have his permission to access his information!!! Funny. They never have that issue when I go to pay his bill!!

I keep trying to get all bases covered, we have our health care POAs, and yet is seems every time I go someplace else, I run into roadblocks again.

I think I'm going to make a recording of DH saying that I am his wife and he gives his permission for them to share all info with me. That would seem to be the only thing that works. I mean we're ok for now while he can speak for himself, but if that should change, then I'm in trouble. A lot of the time he wants me to do the calls as with his hearing situation, he can't understand a lot of the folks on the phone, especially if they are soft spoken or have an accent.

I was the proxy for both my parents and used to carry a photocopy of each, in my purse.

In my state, you have to be certain to have a Durable Power Of Attorney for Health Care in order for it to remain in effect if the person giving it becomes incompetent. A regular Power of Attorney is only in effect while the giver is competent, only the Durable will be honored. Not sure if this is true in other states but worth investigating. Most places would require a notarized original, not sure a photo would do. If your health system uses MY Chart, it can be entered there. Otherwise, maybe keep in a safe place and be sure someone else knows where and can access it. In case you are both in a car accident or something, or you can’t get home to get it. Good idea to both have back up people with DPOA, too.

My husband & I both completed the Physicians Orders for Life Sustaining Treatment / POLST back in 2020. Our doctors signed and they were scanned in & added to our Mychart records. I was hospitalized twice last year and the hospital had access to this document and doctors talked to me about my choices while I was in ER and after being admitted. It is stated on these forms that copies & are acceptable. The original of these forms is hanging on the side of our frig for any EMT that might be in our house in an emergency.

Separate from that to deal with end of life, we each have documented on our medical records with our PCP that full access to each other’s records is allowed.

Additionally, we have the Durable POA that olychick mentions. Those docs are in our house fireproof safe.

My mom had filled out forms with her PCP to allow me access to her medical records and to make decisions if she could not. I had my sister come with us to a medical appointment & had her fill out the same forms to add her as additional. My mom wound up in ER and because of covid restrictions in place then, only one of us could be in ER with her - she was critical & in mid stage dementia. It was my sister who was available but the hospital wouldn’t let her make decisions until they looked up mom’s medical file to verify she was authorized to make decisions. We were spared much anguish because we were prepared.

It seems like mychart or some version of Epic medical record sharing makes a person’s medical records easier to share between unaffiliated medical providers.

My cousin is JW and showed me a healthcare piece of paper he always carries in his wallet with a healthcare poa and of course it says no transfusions. But that won't help over the phone...

Isn't your medical record electronic? Mine sits in my healthcare system's account. Which talks to other healthcare systems. At least it has from my dental office to my medical office and my adult child's TN account to their NC account (and vice-versa).

I'd suggest consulting with an attorney to get accurate information that pertains to your state and circumstances. It's apparent from everyone's responses that it can vary from state to state. A legal opinion might be the best way to go to ensure you're receiving correct information.

You could also ask at the doctor’s office. They gave you the forms they need to allow each of you access to each other’s medical info. Ask them what happens with the form when you turn it in. Do they give the original back to you? Ask them what happens when either of you might be admitted to a local hospital. Are the forms shared electronically?

In an emergency situation, you would be his next of kin (and he, yours). Medical staff would share information with you.

Otherwise, I would go with your plan, and keep copies on phones and an extra hard copy at home.

"Also, if anybody knows what other procedures do we need to do or forms and legal documents to obtain so that we are kept in the loop for one another’s medical care?"

Does your doctor/hospital have a patient portal that you use? My spouse and I were able to permit the other to look at all the documentation, messages, test results, etc. with a simple designation made in the portal. No forms, for us, for that.

I get notified whenever there's an update made to their info. And,vice versa.