I'm no help. Pan fried oysters are one of my favorites but also something I have never been able to cook at home to my satisfaction. So I just enjoy them at a local restaurant that has fresh oysters daily.

Yours sound good!!

DD makes excellent fried oysters, and says

“I just make a simple soda [water] or beer batter with some pepper cayenne, then fry and sprinkle with salt right out of the oil”

Okay, good to know that a beer batter would work. I think that's what I want, but didn't even think of it until I was writing this post. Will try that next. Thank DD!

The following link has some tempura batter recipes which might fit the bill:

https://www.gardenweb.com/discussions/2395512/speaking-about-deep-frying-tempura#n=12

I only know fried oysters for po' boys, and have never made them, though the ones I've seen are the exact kind you don't want, with a big crunch. The buttermilk threw me, though. Everybody loves my beer baytered, pan fried things, so I get that. I've seen a number of old, soak the chicken in buttermilk recipes, where the buttermilk is a tenderizer. I know mishandled oysters can be like rubber, but I thought that was the point of frying—in and out of very hot, fast so they'll stay tender? So I looked around and did see where some said ir was for tenderizing, and others said it made the coating stick better (isn't dry best for that?). But I also found admonissions never to soak them because it drives out the juices that give them their flavor. Unless the point is to remove the ocean brininess? Which I could understand from the days when bivalves, espectially oysters, were considered food for the poor, but just seems wasteful now…

I dunno, but thanks for the fun exploration!

We dined at our favorite Japanese restaurant tonight and had exquisite fried oysters. The outside was shatteringly crisp panko and the oysters were beautifully tender. Tonight was the last night for the owner- chef. I think his staff will take over. I hope they can maintain his standards but he is excellent and a super nice guy.

Well, thanks to everyone's input and inspiration, I cooked the rest of the oysters tonight and did a really simple tempura batter. They were delicious. I didn't deep fry but pan fried in a generous amount of oil. I didn't have the club soda called for, but had some sparkling water that is quite minerally, so used that. Egg, flour, soda and an egg. So simple. I mixed the batter and dropped the oysters into it all at once, then fished them out to drop in the pan. So much easier than rolling in flour/egg/cornmeal. I might try one more time and try to get something halfway between my two attempts. The tempura was delicious, but just a little more delicate than I wanted. But 100 times better than my first attempt. So thanks everyone!

Where is MarilynC when we need her 😊Probably tending to her animals. She has likely cooked more oysters than the rest of us combined,

My method is very different than the result you hope for. For one thing, I don't par boil when many do. Even the Hama Hama Farm website suggests it.

I buy small or extra small, very occasionally yearlings but what a splurge those have become. I only dust lightly with rice flour then pan fry in coconut oil. S&P. My skillet is medium high so I get a little crisp to the outside without over cooking them. We eat quite a bit seafood, but all of it cooked very simply.

I can't remember the last time i had restaurant oysters,,,,too much breading, or raw which I no longer eat 😊 I like tempura shrimp, I don't do oysters that way but I'm pleased your second attempt made you happier,

I bought these already shucked, in a jar. They are grown right here so are very fresh. I don't like them well enough to bother with shucking myself, tho I go to a summer cabin of friends frequently when summer actually arrives and we pick oysters and dig steamer clams on their beach. I bought extra small, which was 2 very generous dinner servings. I need Oysters to be cooked and have some kind of batter on them...the texture is too slug like when raw or unadorned to allow me to enjoy them, lol.

I rarely buy them, because they are expensive. DH doesn’t care for them.

I have made oyster stew for one and I have made oysters Rockefella. I am sqeamish* about eating them raw, so never tried.

*live critter, safety? vibrio? parasites?

Does anyone remember Trader Vic’s Bongo Bong Soup — a seasoned purée of oysters, spinach and cream? I used to enjoy this.

Bongo Bongo Soup — Trader Vic’s

https://lostdishes.com/tradervics/bongo.htm

@petalique I can't say that looks delicious, but I LOVE spinach soup, so I imagine I would have loved that.

Floral, I can shuck them, so can DH but I often buy them shucked. He was one of 10 children. They had a small farm and raised a lot of their own food but it still took a lot to keep everyone clothed, make dental appts etc. FIL fished commercially or sometimes worked in one of the mills. He did grounds keeping at a state park in his later years. Weeks he wasn't working, MIL did while he did the cooking, laundry etc. She worked in the canneries processing cranberries, shrimp, crab, and yes shucking oysters..

I have her oyster knife. I rarely use it and haven't in the last few years. I don't think any of those women escaped an injury at some point and it was usually a wound to the palm of one hand from a slipped oyster knife. She was no exception - an ugly cut that took some time to heal.

I only wish I could shake crab like those women did but I don't even come close. They were paid by the pound of finished product so clean precise quantity was important. I am more skilled at asking DH to do it 😊