I'm in the same boat. I haven't colored my hair in over a year. It looks like hell, but I really want to grow it all out. Lol. I use that Aussie Leave in De-tangling milk. I hate the crunchy wet look. This product is light.

Maybe try Complete 10 leave in conditioner. I buy the walmart equate version.

My hair gets colored. Coloring changes the texture. I buy hair coloring from Dollar Tree, $1. It's wavy and soft....but occasionally I use conditioner on it. I also do not wash it every day. I like Pantene. I use a hair claw to hold it up off my neck, this time of year. I am "not" going to spend 20 minutes a day braiding or styling my hair....so once every 4 weeks I spend 20 minutes....yes...that's all the time it takes to dye my hair. It takes 20 years off .....no face lift or botox required. lol

I use Andalou Leave-In Conditioner on my frizzy grays. It's light-weight, non-greasy, and has a pleasant orange-vanilla scent, like a Creamsicle. I buy it at a natural food store where it's often on sale for $8. A tube lasts me a long time since I only need a pea-sized amount.

https://andalou.com/collections/moisture-rich-argan-oil-shea/products/argan-oil-shea-moisture-rich-leave-in-conditioner

https://www.amazon.com/Andalou-Naturals-Argan-Leave-Conditioner/dp/B00JNBJ5AI

Kathsgrdn, they still have VO5 in a tube. I bought some a few months ago but I can't remember where. Must have been Wal-Mart or Target.

I saw VO5 both for regular and for gray hair (has a purple-ish blue tinge) at Meijer - don't know if that grocer is in your area.

Just a suggestion because I too do not like the feeling of mousse. By accident I discovered if I allowed it to dry then brushed my hair it would leave the hairs in place but not have that uck feeling. I have many natural swirls of hair and after several years of doing the application, natural drying, then brushing what I can see in the mirror no longer sticks up like a mad scientist of movies.

This is what I use for frizzy hair - a tiny bit goes a long way. All their products are color safe too.

https://giovannicosmetics.com/

I wrote down all the suggestions, thanks everyone. Will start with the silver vo5. For some reason I can find it on Wal-mart.com now? Only available to be shipped from other sources. I'll give this a try first since I get free shipping and it's cheap, can buy a little tube to try it out. If I don't like it will move to another suggestion.

I find blow drying and a straightener works for my hair, but I've gotten to the point I don't care if my hair is every which way but lose. I also use a little oil in my hair which tames it a bit as well.

Try Brylcreem available at Walgreens. The slogan from many years ago was "a little dab will do you" and that's still true today. I apply it only once immediately after shampooing my hair. Do not fully dry the hair, but leave it fairly wet. I towel off just enough water to keep it from dripping. Start with a small amount of Brylcreem and apply more if needed. Apply and comb it into the hair. After the hair has been laid straight (and the loose hair removed from the comb). begin styling the hair. You won;'t need to apply it again until your hair is shampooed again. You can rinse the sweat out out of the hair during your daily shower. Your natural oils will be sufficient until the next shampoo.

My white hair turned frizzy in my 70s. i found that i need to use a moiaturizing shampoo and a leave in cream rinse. My hair got very dry and frizzed.

I had an old tube of Vo5 and just used it this morning--just a pea size--and what a difference it made with my hair. Will see if it sticks out in the morning. Thanks for mentioning it.

Wonder water is amazing!