I had to look this up. They are lovely.

You know, there are some people, my DD ans her fiance to name a few, that don’t like the whole diamond trade industry and have no interest in diamonds. He gave DD a saphire ring,

The other option would be to get a cluster of diamonds around a small solitaire.

Not a good idea to want something that is unaffordable.

Yes, most of my family can as my husband's family own several jewelry stores.

Thing I learned years ago in minerology class is that a diamond will disappear in water. The problem with this is you might still see the light reflections on cut surfaces.

If rings are too big, I automatically assume they're moissanite, cubic or other fake diamond. That's not to say there's anything wrong with it. Large ones cost a fortune, and I'd rather put the money into a house, honeymoon, or something.

We talked about getting married and I only wanted moissanite. But we never got around to it, it wasn't the end all and be all to our relationship. When he died people wondered if it was difficult or any issues with the legalities since we weren't married, but when I told the funeral director how long we were together, he said we were definitely married in the eyes of the law.

As long as the recipient is told that its not a real diamond and is Ok with it it should not be a problem. Don’t give someone a fake when they think its the real thing.

Definitely not a good idea to want something that is unaffordable.

I think moissanite is a good choice, and I also think that it will be difficult for most people to tell the difference, except perhaps in sunlight. It is not that cheap, but it does retain value, although not quite as well as diamonds.

Personally, I think diamonds are overrated. I wear large cubit zirconia earrings, but I am not trying to fool anyone into thinking they are diamonds. I actually prefer Alexandrite, but I can only afford the fake ones, and some of the fake ones are better than others.

I agree with Lars....Definitely not a good idea to want something that is unaffordable.

Your question is about an average person.

I'm an average person, of the male variety. I think I can speak for many others of my gender - I don't pay an iota of attention to anyone's jewelry, unless it's tasteless and gaudy for the circumstances. Sometimes I see that. From time to time we interact with people with a lot of money and little good taste. That's fine. I can assume it's all real, I can assume it's all fake. Sometimes I glance at jewelry, sometimes I don't. I don't care what it is or isn't. Do you?

People with a lot of money, with good taste, are not flamboyant or flashy among other people. They may charter a jet for their vacations and stay in exorbitantly priced places but when they talk about it, it was simply their trip to Europe, or to an island, or skiing. Without details. It's the same thing. No one cares about any of that either.

Do you friend a favor, tell her large diamond rings are tacky and show a lack of class. Steer her toward something more tasteful. Demanding something unnecessary that's expensive is a bad way to start off a marriage.

Women who appreciate jewelry, want to wear "jewels". You know I love deals. There are ways to make-it-affordable if she's interested in going through the trouble. Buy an estate ring, without the diamond. Lots of diamond rings get traded in because the diamond gets chipped....or....the wearer wants a new style. You should be able to get a nice setting, solid 14k for "cheap". Then buy the diamond separately and have it mounted. A large 2.5-3ct pear diamond in a plain setting should be doable for around $6200. The rule for rings, spend 3 months wages. Link to buy loose diamonds Stay within a low price range...and know you can always trade up for your anniversary. ♥

I dislike people who are superficial and have misplaced values. I appreciate really fine wine and cognac. I indulge rarely but when I do or have, the nature or price of what I've done is NEVER discussed with others.

To buy something with the intent of showing it off and talking about it shows a lack of good judgement and class to me. Others can see it differently.

What is HUGE? Who would be impressed -- favorably, that is?

I have a large CZ set in a 14 kt set and no one can tell it's a cz, it's a gorgeous ring! I think the stone is slightly over 1 ct. Anything very much bigger than a carat looks fake even if it's real. A long time ago, my BIL bought my SIL a large diamond and paid a lot for it, it was the ugliest ring ever! The stone was not high quality and dull...I'd rather have a sparkly CZ or other stone than a bad diamond. Plus, he paid a lot for the stone. I think spending $20,000 for a ring is a total waste of money unless you are very rich and can afford whatever you want.

I think her idea of huge is 3 carats. I told her to get a 1 carat moissanite. Nobody but a jeweler will know and put the money towards a home improvement or a special trip. I'd rather make a memory.

I actually don't like fake anything. If something is supposed to be real, then it shoud be real. If it is an alternative, then that's absolutely fine! But, IMO, don't try to pass it off as real. I had to look up "moissanite" as I've never heard of it. If someone has a moissanite ring, that's beautiful, as long as they don't pretend that it's a diamond. I don't know......just one of my quirks.

Good suggestion Annegriet

Moissanite has variations in quality. I've owned both Amora gems and diamonds and even people who brag that they can tell the difference have been unable to. A jeweler with a loupe probably can but not the average person.

Brilliant Earth has a page that explains the differences between moissanite and diamonds.

Had to smile at your comment, Zalco. I agree.

While I'm usually in the real is real camp, given the enslavement of workers to run the diamond mines and the horrible conditions they suffer, I could see where a man-made would have advantages. And whether real or not, anyone looking at the ring would probably assume it is real.

I have a pair of large cz earrings that I call my Judge Judy earrings...only difference is I'm sure hers are real. She is one wealthy woman!

Many women are outraged at the concept of trophy wives. But some of the the same women see nothing wrong in wanting a huge diamond they can flash in front of their friends. Much like the husband does with his trophy wife.

I couldn't, but my husband could.

I have a couple of nice diamonds given to me by my husband. I've kind of come to think of them as a burden. I don't want to lose one. At the same time, I've been coming across stories of people's diamonds and other precious stones being stolen by jewelers when they are in to get cleaned or fixed. I'd personally prefer to go with a substitute stone so I din't have to worry about it.

I used to think along the same lines. I mentioned this to a jeweler friend and she said, ”We have our own diamonds, we don’t need yours!”

When DH and I married 43 years ago, I informed him I *was* the trophy wife and this was as good as it was ever gonna get!!

I think you need to butt out. This is between them, not you. Hopefully a wake up call for the groom to be.

The most effective way to tell Moissanite apart from a diamond is to use a loupe to look through the top, or the crown, of the jewel at an angle. You will see two slightly blurred lines that indicates a double refraction, an inherent quality of Moissanite. Double refraction is easier to see in some shapes than others.

My friend asked my opinion so I gave it to her. I didn't butt in. I told her my thoughts--"the thought that counts and get moissanite." I'm out of it now.

"people's diamonds and other precious stones being stolen by jewelers when they are in to get cleaned or fixed"

Use my method---my diamond doesn't get cleaned unless the jeweler is never out of my sight. There is short list of jewelers I trust to repair my jools.

I do not own CZ earrings because I worried someone somewhere would know. I was never willing to buy earrings as expensive as diamond ones.

The problem as I see it, for any other jewelry, or even another ring, who cares if it’s real or fake. It’s a look you’re going for, and if it sparkles like a real diamond you’re good. If someone woos over them excessively you don’t have to feel embarrassed saying ”it’s not real.” But how do you get through running around with your hand up in the air dangling your fingers announcing your engagement and friends see the huge ring ”OH. MY. GAWD!!!” and you KNOW they’re thinking about price and every single time having a choice to make?

My late father was a hobbyist gem cutter, and worked for Charles & Colvard, the company which originally made moissanite gems. I don't think the average person carries a loup in their purse. The jewelry that Dad made us is beautiful. In fact, I have a pair of moissanite studs and a pair of diamond studs, and I've mixed them up in my jewelry box. I need to take them to the jeweler for ID.

Real gold jewelry & real diamonds, go up in value....as a generalization. ♥

My grandmother was engaged to a jewelers son. He gifted her with many pieces that were handed down. A lady I used to jog with had a nice heirloom engagement ring, valued at $35K. She was just thrilled to be wearing such a cool .....historic piece. Real = value. But the owner must be able to afford it...

Diamonds don't really go up in value. They are overpriced and, much like a new car, lose much of their value as soon as they are taken home.

People who try to sell their diamonds can generally expect to take a significant loss over what they paid for them, for a variety of reasons.

My son debated this for years as he dated "the one". The "rule" is get a ring equal to so many month's pay which would mean a diamond so large she would not be able to function wearing it. Not every intended WANTS a ring they can't wear or function in. There is no point in a ring that can only be worn when going out on the town. They ended up going with a sapphire. This diamond obsession has gone on long enough. It's not a gem worthy of it's inflated prices! As it would happen a princess was married that year with the same stone. The Royals realized generations ago there is more to meet the eye when you get some color with your sparkle!! A diamond of the same quality and size would have been more than a home and that's just plain STUPID. '"Affordable"?!?!?! because you can "afford" it doesn't mean you SHOULD!!! Sorry but your friend sounds like she needs a priority check!!

I don't think diamonds go up in value, gold definitely does.

I first met my jeweler several years ago. We have fly-by-nite companies that come in usually on long weekends to a hotel and advertise that they buy your jewelery and pay you on the spot.

I wear silver/white gold, and had some yellow gold that I wasn't wearing. Hubby and I took it there and I wasn't happy with the price they offered at all.

I remembered the jeweler that advertised in the paper that he buys gold. We took it there and he offered 4x the price they did. He also asked if I wanted the diamonds back, which I did.

I still have the diamonds, and I've been wondering recently what to do with them. Bangle, necklace, I'm not sure.

Dealers buying gold have no use for diamonds, that is true. Ever watch The Antiques Road show? Diamond jewelry goes up in value on THAT show.....Link It may take 100 years....☺

arcy.....Engagement rings are a gift. How RUDE! I'm sorry every thread has to involve calling people names and involves personal attacks. wow......

I think the bride and groom should have an open conversation about finances and how much is reasonable to spend on a ring. They need to be on the same page when it comes to money. This is a good place to start.

I love Judge Judy's earrings. I wouldn't wear them daily. They look more dressy to me.

A few people think my wedding set must be fake. It is not. But it really isn't any of their business, is it?

My diamond was a gift between us, not for show. We followed the rule "small but GOOD. I am happy with that. Seniorgal.

One of my brothers-in-law is a JA Certified Master Bench Jeweler. He designs and creates/makes jewelry. I know I'm lucky in that I can take anything to him to be repaired, and should he retire, he knows which other jewelers can be trusted.

I don't think my friend needs a reality check. I think she is looking for something time-less and something to pass on to a daughter, granddaughter or niece. It's not important to me per se but I also inherited a fancy big diamond from my mother. I guess I actually see it less shallow than people who want a fancy schmancy car that will last at most 10 years. Honestly, to each his own.

All I care about is pretty & sparkly. I adore my princess cut CZ stud earrings. Sparkly clear crystals--yup, sign me up! I remember when my MIL got expensive diamond earrings and thinking that I would be afraid I would lose them. (Although hers did have screw on backs.)

I have working hands--gardening, home repairs, woodworking, power tools, etc., so I don't wear rings any more. Too dangerous and a good friend lost a stone from her engagement set somewhere in her garden. My diamond engagement ring is stowed away for those reasons. Also, it probably would need to be resized.

I picked up a very nice silver & inlaid opal ring in MX to wear during the winter when I'm more sedentary but I can wear it for only a few days because I'm allergic to the metal. Probably nickel content.

Have recently read that supposedly 925 Sterling Silver made in the USA is non-allergic. And I believe that may be true because I have a beautiful silver bracelet also bought on a trip to MX. The seller swore up & down that I would not have an allergic reaction to the silver--and he was correct. I have no problems wearing it. I've worn it for weeks at a time with no reaction.

Bracelets are my weakness...I'd 10x rather have a new bracelet vs earrings and 1000x rather than a ring. Of course, I don't wear those either when I am mucking about.

We all like what we like. It's only a problem if you misjudge what you can afford and get into financial trouble -- other than that, go for it :-)

I know what I like and I know it'd get me and DH in trouble deep if I tried to possess a jewel of this magnitude, so I'll just visit my favorite jewels at the Smithsonian instead.

Last night I heard about a woman who bought ”funeral earrings.” Big, expensive diamonds. The idea is that when she dies, they get sold to pay for the funeral. The money sould be much better off under her mattress, but hey, she gets to enjoy it while alive. I thought it was funny.

Nickel--that Smithsonian website is fantastic. Thanks for sharing. So many beautiful pieces! I love old vintage jewelry and always wonder about their story.

I totally agree with the to each her own sentiment, but this justification is pretty funny in light of all we read here about passing on jewelry.

I think she is looking for something time-less and something to pass on to a daughter,

Great website, @User. Thanks for the link. @foodonastump, buying a commodity that can be enjoyed during life, then sold to pay funerary expenses is kind of a genius idea. I'm not sure whether diamond earrings will work for that, but still it's a fun idea to consider.

(Fun little brag: my daughter was a summer intern at the Smithsonian when they received the Dom Pedro Aquamarine. She was one of the first people there to hold it!)

I was thinking about heirloom jewelry myself. My nephew is planning on getting engaged. My sister offered hime several beautiful rings -- we inherited quite a few--and it was a no-go.

I think the "3 months salary" rule was invented by deBeers in a 1930s marketing campaign. Obviously it was pretty successful. There's a few vendors selling synthetic diamond, which do not carry the "blood diamond" stigma, although they seem to top out at 1 carat. Synthetic is compositionally the same as mined, although I think they put something in so that a jeweler/professional can tell the difference.

I never considered that a jeweler offering to clean a ring might not be on the up and up. The only time I had my ring cleaned the person was right back with it in about 10 minutes....and I have a unique setting that is probably not possible for the average jeweler to be able to re-set a stone in that amount of time.

One of the "four Cs" is clarity -- the prices start to really hike up for quality diamonds above 1 carat (well ok, depends on budget what is considered a lot of money to spend)..... one etiquette rule I'd never considered (well, like life, never considered until I encountered it)... don't ever hold out your hands to show off a diamond in a group. One friend went for a 3carat size, but in order to afford it, they had to make concessions - not visible to most, particularly in every day wear. But when the hands shot out for the "group engagement ring show off" -- it was pretty darn yellow/dingy compared to the higher quality stones... more power to folks with the disposable income for high quality large diamonds. Rock on.

Another consideration could be insurance; if the owner of a large diamond ring wants to insure it -- that's can cost a fair amount on an annual basis.

I remember being in the car with my fiancé when a deBeers ad came on urging men to spend at least three months salary on a ring. I turned off the radio and told my sweetheart that was a no-no for me. I also do not care for diamond solitaires, and chose an eternity band instead.

PS I was acutely embarassed by that ad.