I am really struggling to keep my ground and just have the two of us. My oldest keeps asking us to go to her BF"s family again this year. They had a large crowd last year and it was very lovely....but there is a pandemic, and BF's dad is undergoing chemo. They have been going there and visiting on weekends.

My youngest will still be in the UK.

I have to be honest. For the past many years, holidays are on me and I am tired. tired of feeling that I am doing things because I should not because I want to.

I was so grateful to be invited last year and just have to bring the desserts. The only upside to the virus is that I don't have to feel guilty about keeping things simple this year.

2Katz, your recipe looks really good. DH loves the yam casserole with the marshmallow and yours bumps mine up a notch or two.

eld - that sweet potato recipe is REALLY good. It's sweet enough but not overly so and baking the potatoes makes it so easy to prepare. I put the marshmallows on when I took it to friends' house because the Mr. likes them but will skip that for the two of us.

Funny, I was thinking of trying to bake them but DH is so fussy when it comes to his favorites. It takes forever to boil those hard yams!

If it's just the two of us, I might try yours and also mine. In my opinion, yours is superior but again DH has his favorites.

If I tweak a recipe he will call me out on it! Or, if I forget an ingredient in a new recipe, I can never make that recipe with that ingredient if he likes it the first way!

For the past 4 years, we leave our summer place and drive to our winter place right about this time of year. Then we fly back to spend Christmas with our children and extended family, hosting a big Christmas eve celebration.

This year, we decided instead to stay till the end of November, spending T-day with family and not fly back for Christmas. We issued a heads up on our plans to extended family back in August.

We just pulled back our invite and will only have our 2 young adult children and their significant others. They each live 3 and 4 hours away, so they will be visiting for the weekend. So just 6 of us. I pre-ordered a 14-16 pound turkey from our favorite area farm so plenty of leftovers to send home with them. I'll make candied sweet potatoes(no marshmellows ever!), whole fresh cranberry sauce, two green veggies and my new favorite winter kale salad(I add pomegranite seeds) . I am looking forward to it.

About five years ago, one of our friends started a Friendsgiving potluck (with assigned dishes) at their home. Before that, we always spent the day and weekend enjoying our favorite ready-made foods from a local gourmet market, wrapping presents and decorating the house for Christmas. I'm actually looking forward to doing that again. The potluck was fun but involved driving for two hours each way which I won't miss. I'd better check the market to see what they are offering. I haven't been in there since COVID started. I may have to cook if their selections are drastically reduced.

Just discussed this with DH last night. We have been invited to spend the day with dear friends, the only people we have socialized with at all during covid because we all have little to no other exposure. However....all 4 of their young adult kids + a friend (21 - 26) will be coming in from different places and there is no way we will go. Our own kids are far across the country so it's going to be another holiday, another day of life in a pandemic where it's just the two of us trying not to miss our families, friends and life pre-covid. I love the foods of Thanksgiving but that might point up the obvious so maybe I'll make a chicago style pizza instead.

The only upside to the virus is that I don't have to feel guilty about keeping things simple this year.

This is me. My brother lives 30 miles one way and sister lives 30 miles the other way. In the past, Thanksgiving was a long day trying to hit both houses.

This year I'm just saying no with no guilt.

25 years ago I moved to NY away from family. I made my first (and only) turkey and dressing meal. Both my mother and grandmother were both on the phone walking me through the process. I might try my hand again. If I remember correctly, it was an awful lot of work. Maybe I'll try my hand with a picnic ham.

We'll have Thanksgiving here at our house with those in our "bubble"--our daughter (who is living with us during Covid), our son and his wife, and his wife's parents. We all started this bubble on our son's enchanting makeshift wedding day in March, just as the pandemic was getting under way. We've since vacationed with this bubble, and frequently dine with them, and I'm so grateful to be able to have them. I'm planning my usual Thanksgiving menu of turkey in the Big Green Egg, and 1,000 side dishes, including homemade sweet potato rolls, corn pudding, Brussels sprouts with bacon and carrots, orange-scented cranberry sauce, two kinds of dressing, chipotle sweet potatoes, old-fashioned gingerbread cake with lemon sauce, and so much more. I'm looking forward to the holiday, as I always do.

We normally have just us and MIL. I ordered a locally raised turkey that will be smoked at a microbrewery. Weather is often great and we have the windows open, so we are planning to be outside. We normally eat midafternoon. If it's super cold or raining, we might need to move to Friday. DH is usually super busy at work at the end of the month and I am finishing the semester, so we can't go anywhere. I can't really travel to visit my family anyways due to quarantine restrictions.

2katz,

Your T-giving sounds like it will be wonderful!

We try to keep T-giving low key around here. Just 4 of us. We've done hosting for branches of dh's family, but somehow that branch always creates a meltdown out of the sky and ruins the day. It's so consistent that we decided it's best to not have that branch over, sorry to say. For a few years dh had to fib and tell that branch that we were going to be out of town for T-giving so we are not hosting. That was hard. And strange. Since then we have lovely and simple T-giving times at home. One will drive home for the holiday. The other 3 of us live under one roof. We all hope to be virus-free of course.

I keep the menu simple with a small turkey, mashed potatoes, peas and corn, maybe stuffing, maybe not, cranberries from a can-as we like it, one dd usually gets her baker on and makes a nice amazing bread loaf in a cast iron dutch oven or dessert, I'll make pumpkin pies. I've learned how to make simple sweet potatoes in the oven that people will eat. I might do that, but they are still not too fond of sweet potatoes in any form, we'll see. But that's about it. And that's enough I've found. I feel less frazzled not preparing enough different dishes for an army and everyone enjoys their foods and company. We've found our happy T-giving jam.

It's day full of cooking and nice smells. We are together (and meltdown-free) and we enjoy each other's company. Now that the kids are all grown up, it's nice that they still want to be home for the holiday.

We'll go on walks during the day and smell the different T-giving dinners cooking through the neighborhood. We like that. Then we get near our house and smell our own dinner cooking. It's nice.

eld6161 said:

I have to be honest. For the past many years, holidays are on me and I am tired. tired of feeling that I am doing things because I should not because I want to.

eld, I feel exactly the same way. I have hosted Christmas for the family for the past 30 years and I am tired. This year we (my sister and her husband, my brother and his wife, and I) are all staying home for the holidays. We are all between 68 and 78 years old. My brother is a diabetic with heart conditions, my sister has COPD, and my BIL has a heart condition (stents). Also, my SIL always brings over her brother who had a traumatic brain injury and has a shunt in his head. God forbid someone was asymptomatic----half or most of my family could be wiped out.

I am quite happy to be staying home alone this year. I will still decorate my home. There will be no pressure about buying gifts (I never know what to buy people. Everyone has everything). I will celebrate Christmas in my own way.

It's just the two of us. My family lives on the east coast. I love Thanksgiving because it's the one holiday where I cook the traditional foods I grew up with. I make a turkey breast but roast wings or legs so I can make gravy. I don't always make potatoes because they're not so special and last-minute while I'm busy with gravy, etc. I do make them with the leftovers.

The menu is turkey, stuffing, baked yams, rutabagas, creamed onions, homemade cranberry sauce, and sweet potato pie. Those are the must-haves. It's a lot for one person to cook, along with a brunch, but I pace myself the day before and on Thanksgiving.

Don“t know yet. It will be my husband and I, my mil and my sister and her husband. I’m putting my foot down and Not hosting as I host Christmas. I’m happy to help with the cooking. We like a traditional meal and I know there will be turkey and dressing, most likely a sweet potato casserole and more than likely corn and green beans. I make a delish cranberry salad. Desserts are not always traditional and we”ll have a couple of choices. Can’t wait to see who hosts!!

@Tina Marie - could you tell us more about the cranberry salad?

It will just be DH and me and our 3 kids. DD will be home from college about a week before. One DS is local, and the other is coming from AZ (he will get tested). We had a family vote on the meal and decided to bail on the usual turkey and have chicken pot pies made by DH and DD. We might need to have mashed potatoes too. And then of course pies again for dessert. Oink. I’m just happy to have the 5 of us in one place for the first time in 9 months, I don’t care what we eat.

I feel badly about my dad, who is in asst living and not allowed to come here. Hopefully we can bring him some pie or something. I’m sure the facility will be issuing some set of rules for Thanksgiving soon. I’m also sure they’ll do their best to make the day special for the residents.

I expect to have Thanksgiving with the same 3 people and a dog I have been bubbled with. I prefer their company to that of anyone I'd normally see on T-day anyway. :)

I'm going to miss my Thanksgiving dinnerware and beautiful linens. We're in a bubble of 4 - 2 heterosexual married humans and 2 young Australian Shepherds. I just spent the last half hour on our sofa with my head on my youngest Aussies's stomach listening to his warm, gurgling sounds. Merry Christmas to me!

I'm invited to a friend's house. Price of entry is macaroni and cheese.

I'll be staying home alone as I live by myself and don't feel safe with the usual holiday get togethers. I would make a turkey breast if I can find an organic one through curbside pick up which I highly doubt, so I don't know, but I will make homemade sausage cornbread dressing, a bit of mashed potatoes, steamed green beans, roasted butternut squash chunks with brussell sprouts and canned whole berry cranberries - likely the day before, at least the stuffing, so I can curl up and have a movie day. So nice to have a work day off to just r e l a x.

Kay, do you make all the food? Sounds delicious! Especially the 1000 side dishes. lol

I did all the holidays until DS1 got married then he took over since he loves to cook. Even though he's 2 minutes away on foot, we won't see each other due to Covid. Both DH and I are burnt out on cooking for some reason and we're still relatively young.

I'm thinking about pickup catering which we did one other time, but with OK's weather and ten miles to drive, it's scary.

Not sure about those bubbles people are doing. I wouldn't trust anyone I don't live with.

I might make one of our favorite meals, 7 layer Mexican Dip, bite size Tostido's, and tuna salad sandwiches. For real. :)

No extended family for us this year. Just dh, me and three of our four kids. Older son will be coming home from college about 5 days before Thanksgiving. He gets tested regularly at school, so I’m not too concerned about possible exposure (his school is being very careful). Older daughter finishes her fall semester the Friday before Thanksgiving and then has two months off. She can’t come home though because she has a job that will not allow her to take that much time off. She will stay in her off campus apartment. Her boyfriend isn’t able to go home either so they will spend their Thanksgiving together. She will be flying home for Christmas though.

We will stay have all of our traditional T-Day foods, but I won’t feel as much stress trying to time everything perfectly, etc.

My parents will be alone, but they are good cooks and will make their own small meal. If weather is not too cold, we may bring dessert over and eat outside on their back porch and deck. I’m not sure what my siblings and their families are doing but they are being careful, so assume they also just staying home with their immediate families.

Home with just me, husband and son #1. Son #2 and his wife will go to her parents' home. We were invited, but declined. I'd like to ignore the regular meal, but son1 has his heart set on it and he asks for very little. We have visited my mother at her CCRC the past few years for their buffet style dinner. Not a fan, but easier than having her come to our home. This year she has moved to assisted living so we will not see her. She will complain bitterly about not being with us, the meal, etc. I guess I wouldn't blame her if that wasn't her default pre-covid. Years ago I posted about a scathing email she sent my brother about her "terrible" thanksgiving at my home. Thankful to have THAT off the table this year!

Sigh.

I know it’s going to be different and small, I don’t know exactly how small yet. It could be the 2 of us, we may have a total of 9. Decision won’t be made for a week or 2.

I know that if there are more then DH and myself we will be eating outside.

Ours will be the two of us, my daughter and her husband and my son who is in college. Small group for sure.

Probably just the two of us as we don't have a safe bubble. Our DD, SIL, and GD live in our same city, but do not consider themselves to be safe for us since we are in our 70's. Our DS & 2 GDs live across the country so we won't be with them, sadly. We have veered away from the traditional turkey dinners as none of us really enjoys the food that much. Imagine DH & I will do a good seafood dinner. My sister here is in assisted living facility & can't leave & we can only visit her in a special Plexiglas room wearing masks & shields. I will probably take her some dessert, though & leave with the staff if we don't go to the Plexiglas room!! OMG, did I really just have to say that....a Plexiglas room???!!! So surreal, but we are trying to do our very best to keep ourselves & our loved ones safe. I do plan to do some Christmas seasonal decorating, though. Just for some cheer & light....nothing elaborate.

I have to say, you are all inspiring me. I'm in a funk, picturing myself sulking on the sofa, refusing to cook because I'm just so over this! So sick of missing everyone and not doing anything.... And then I'm quickly reminded of how much more terrible life is for others. I've got to give myself a good kick in the ass and make dinner for the two of us. We've been invited to the friends who we have done Thanksgiving with for the last dozen years at least. They'll do it outside, but one of the guests is a school teacher -teaching in the classroom, and a couple of others are going into to work a day or two a week. Between drinking and eating, masks will be off. And even outside, with the numbers rising, it feels too precarious to expose my 76-year-old DH who suffers from COPD....

It will just be DH and me this year. We usually go to my brothers four hours away and they surprisingly invited us, but with all the regulars it would be at least 20 and we think that’s just way too many to be safe.

We are debating whether to try and have two of the kids and spouses for Christmas. I’m very torn about what to do.

It will likely be just my DH and me for Thanksgiving and that will be a first and feel just a wee bit sad. I'm considering alternatives like a picnic and a hike or kayaking, etc. Need to change it up for Thanksgiving Day, I think. I realize I have much for which to be thankful but would like to avoid feeling too nostalgic about Thanksgivings past when family gathered at my home for the traditional experience.

I am looking forward to spending that weekend decorating for the December holidays as usual. Might even have a Scotch and wrap a few presents :).

If DD hasn’t had her baby by Nov 20th we are all going to be glued to our phones waiting for it. When she does have it I will be with her, SIL and baby Andrew for about ten days before her MIL flies down from Wisconsin and takes over grandma duty.

Not sure yet. Probably go to Maine, overseeing some work there. I ordered turkey cookie cutters, because that is sooooo important.

Last year I got the turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy from a caterer. Makes it a lot easier since my Maine house has only one oven. I goose up the gravy w a little marsala, pureed roasted root veggies, and cream, YUM. Then I make my own everything else ... prob baked yams, orange cranberry sauce, spinach salad, pumpkin custard and apple pie.

We haven’t talked about it, but probably just the three of us. We might drop off dinner for DS and his girlfriend, depending on what they do. I think I’ll drop something off for my brother, too. Not being able to eat out is getting old for him, I think he’s tired of cooking! I hope I’ll be able to see my mother. I’ll find out if they are serving turkey dinner at lunchtime, and if so I will join her. We will have to be in her suite because I can’t be with the general population, but it will be nice to help her enjoy her dinner, and express again through action and prayer how thankful I am for her, for her staff, and for hospice.

That's so nice, Bpath. : )