My condolences to Linda and family.

So sorry, Linda. It's always a tragedy to lose a loved one, but somehow in this very difficult time, the tragedy is even harder to take. My deepest sympathy.

I am so sorry Linda. Sending hugs and prayers to you and your family.

I too am very sorry Linda that you lost your husband, hugs.

Sue

I am so very sorry. Keeping you in a prayer for coping and comfort.

Hugs.

Linda, I am so sorry for your loss. Sending a virtual hug your way.

Condolences to you, remembering you in my prayers.

linda, i'm so very, very sorry for your loss and for you, as well, lukki.

Linda, so sorry for the loss of your husband. ((((hugs)))) to you

Linda, I am so very sorry for your loss. My heart breaks for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Linda, I’m so sorry for your loss. I pray for strength for you to get you through this painful time. To you too Lukki and anyone suffering a loss

I'm so sorry, Linda

Heartfelt sympathy, dear widows. Gasp! That dreaded *word*! That *missing*! That sudden silence, with only absence where your mind and heart still look for his familiar, loving presence. How I dread this! Sending you sympathy and courage.

Linda, you have my deepest sympathy and I will keep you and your loved ones in my prayers.

I'm very sorry for your loss, Linda. My best wishes to you for strength, courage and peace of mind in the coming days and months.

Lukki, I wasn't aware that your husband had passed. My deepest condolences to you too during this difficult time.

Oh Linda, I'm so very sorry to read this. I hope you have much support and will say a little prayer for you. And for all the recent and long-time widows and widowers.

I'm so sorry, Linda, may he rest in peace.

I'm so sorry, Linda.

Linda, I'm very sorry you lost your husband. I wish you peace from your grief. You have so many friends here, please lean on us anytime you need to. Good bless his soul.

I am so very sorry Linda.

My condolences to you and your family.

I'm sorry, Linda. Thinking of you. Hugs.

Hugs and my condolences, Linda.

So sorry for your loss ((((((((Linda))))))))).

I’m so sorry to read this. I can’t even imagine what you are going through. An online grief support group might be helpful.

My condolences, Linda. Hope you have someone close you can rely on to help you.

Caring thoughts going to both of you who have lost their husbands recently.

Linda and Lukki Irish , having lost my husband on July 15th, I share your grief and heartbreak. You have my deepest sympathy. I know my dear husband is with the Lord and that is a great comfort, but I feel the loss greatly. I feel so alone, even though I'm surrounded by family. There is nothing that can replace that one very special person in your life.

Sending you prayers for comfort, strength, and peace.🙏🏼

My sincere sympathy to those of you who have also lost your husbands. May God give you all of the strength and comforting you need as you begin your "new Normal" as I am doing.

Linda how are you doing? I have been thinking of you constantly. I hope you are eating and taking care of yourself.

So sorry woodrose. I hope you find solace and comfort in memories.

Hi Dawn, thank you for the kind words. I didn’t post a thread about it, I tried but couldn’t get through writing it.

Woodrose, I’m so sorry for your loss as well. It is a very lonely space to be, the sadness is overwhelming.

We won't talk about eating Raven, but I take all of my vitamins which are many and try to drink a daily Ensure to get needed nutrients. I always eat my usual breakfast of 3 pieces of toast with grape jelly and some coffee. It is supper meals that are hard. Frozen dinners are yuck to me. I try to order at least one meal a week delivered from my favorite restaurant. May have to do that twice a week. Wish I had a neighbor who liked to cook who would share with me, but I don't. In time I may need to look into meals on wheels. I can't stand for any length of time to try to make a meal and with one hand on my cane, that leaves me 1 hand to try to carry anything.

Lukki I am also sorry for your loss. I thought I had commented to you but my migraines are getting the best of me these days and I am forgetful. (((((Lukki)))))

I'm so sorry for your loss, Linda. And it's even more difficult in these trying times. I hope you can find some peace.

Yeonassky thank you, I appreciate your kind words. I’m sorry to see that you’re experiencing migraines. I used to have them terribly and my sister is prone to them as well. She’s actually found relief by vaping CBD. I live far from her and don’t know much about it but it’s apparently worked miracles for her.

Linda, my condolences to you on the passing of your beloved Ivan. If you lived nearby, I would love to cook for you. I miss preparing meals to share with my mom so much.

Lukki, I didn't know about your husband. You amaze me with how well you are coping. It must be very hard though.

Woodrose, I am sorry to hear of your loss, too. I am glad that you have family to surround you.

Lukki Irish, I have canes, several walkers, a rollator, handicapped toilet seats that fit over regular toilets. I'm well supplied with medical equipment. I can call the local Senior Citizen's Center that helps seniors with various things and I do believe they have the meals on wheels program. My girlfriend gets my groceries and cleans the house once a week, but will come help me anytime. The man next door helps too and will take me to doctor appointments. Thanks so much for your concerns about me. I should be just fine.

Summer, My DH was my world and soulmate. The grieve comes in waves, sometimes it’s a swell and other times a sunami.

Linda, thank you for responding. I’m really glad you have resources available and a support system. I work in the healthcare industry and see so many who don’t (seemingly) have advocate help or know what to do, my heart breaks for them so I try to reach out when I can.

So sad to hear we have three new losses among our KT friends. I can only guess how difficult it is to lose a spouse. I've only experienced the loss of my DM, 40 years ago. It took such a long time to accept the permanent absence of someone who'd been a constant, loving presence in my life. It was years before I could think of my mom without tearing up.

Courage, dear ladies! Courage!

What a lovely post, Chisue. After my mom and then within 18 months my sister died, I kept telling friends my brain has to relearn this new information all the time. It's better now, but man, do I ever miss them!

I too feel very badly for new widows and widowers; I tried to imagine what it will be like, but my brain won't let me go there. We're very attached to our people, aren't we?

In my case, my Mom passed in July 2016, my sister passed this last February (on another sister’s birthday) and now I’ve lost the love of my life. I lived far away from both my Mom & sister, so it took a while to sink in, but with my husband, at times the grief is overwhelming and it’s only magnifying as time passes. Even though he was ill, I never imagined life without him.

I'm sorry for your loss, I hope things work out for you.

Don't try to be a hero.

An oldster in our family, finding herself a widow (not unexpectedly because her husband was a dozen years older), was resolved to stay in her own home where she'd lived for over 50 years. One neighbor did this for her, another neighbor did that. Then a few different people went shopping for her when she stopped driving. She needed to hire a cleaning service when she couldn't do that any more and had trouble finding one that was satisfactory. A home care attendant service was found so that someone could come every other day to cook and help her shower but the turnover was sometimes monthly, a new person to meet and explain how she wanted things. It got to the point that her well being was declining and she'd really worn out her welcome with taking advantage of the good nature of others.

Very reluctantly, she agreed to move to an elder living facility. Forgetting how well she's been taken care of during the crisis of the last 5 months (that would have been impossible had she still been in her house), she's never had better care. Up until March, fun social interaction with more new friends than anytime in the last 20 years, better food, better medical care (the docs visit the facility), and more happiness. Something she should have done 10 years sooner and she says so.

So best wishes in dealing with what I know will be very hard changes. Please, don't try to be a hero. Don't wait until it's too late to get services or make living arrangements that will make your safer and more comfortable.

Lukki Irish, how many years were you and your hubby married? Big Hugs for you.

Oh Linda, not long enough! He passed on the 21st anniversary of when we met for the first time, we were married 3 months later. I’m thankful that he’s no longer in pain but we were inseparable, so I miss him terribly. I saw that you and your DH have been married 50 years. I can’t imagine the loss you must be feeling as well. ((Big hugs to you as well))

I am sorry to say that I had missed the passing of both Lukki Irish's and Woodrose's husbands. You both have my sympathy.

I think the grief is a little different when then a person has been ill for some time, or when you know death is coming...soon, but not *when*. There's a lot to *do*, then...nothing.

My DM had leukemia. Forty years ago, there was no treatment -- unlike my blood cancer, and that of Lukki's DH. My Top-Producer RE Broker Mom took a desperate, sorrowful year to literally *fade*, and die. I believe it could have been easier with hospice. I don't know if it is harder with big families or not. There was only my DM and me...and my DH and young DS...no other family.