Japan trip Day ? I don't remember where I left off
Kathsgrdn
4 years ago
last modified: 4 years ago
Featured Answer
Sort by:Oldest
Comments (9)
Kathsgrdn
4 years agoRelated Discussions
Take JT to Work Day ... I don't recommend it. Part 2
Comments (5)WOW! What a great place to WORK! Looks like JT & her buddy had an adventureous day! You GO, JT! (and R'ducky!) Too bad R'ducky left some friends behind here in IA! Well, maybe next trip ...& I'm comin' along to play, too! TFS, nmgirl! Jeanne S....See MoreI don't remember where this one came from
Comments (6)I enjoyed this. and Don, I remember that song. My DS never went off to camp, but we had a huge extra wooded lot which was the neighborhood hangout when young, a nearby creek to explore runniing thru undeveloped lots to build on when older. Bike trails and jumping ramps were favorites...never did regain my garden rakes and shovels and DH fussed about the plywood and tools hauled off and never returned...fun memories. josh...See MoreI don't even know where to begin . . .
Comments (11)Sorry guys - we went on a camping trip for the week. It was SOOO nice to be away from cell phones, texting and drama for a while! So lets see . . . SD and I have deep talks about boys, sex, responsibility, pressure, priorities - you name it - ALL the time! It's pretty much a nightly standard - we both look forward to it. It's difficult though - she knows all the 'right' things and can talk and agree with me on all the 'right' things, but when it comes down to it I don't really believe that she will do the 'right' things. The 'wrong' things can be so much more fun and so much more in sync with what everyone else is doing, and at the end of the day I don't know that all my talking and explaining will keep her from going down the path of her mom. I guess this is a standard concern every parent has, but it's so much more in my face because of her mom's example. With regard to SD's sister - yes, we are very worried. We're trying to come up with a way to alert her father as to what is happening without throwing SD under the bus at the same time. More to hopefully come on that. Yes, SD is there for a week at a time for summer break. She is already talking about not wanting to be there for extended weekends once school starts, but mom isn't so thrilled about that. We could attempt to go back to court for it, but I'm hoping once BM gets tired of the driving and SD's complaining things will work out that way naturally. SOOOO - fast forward to today. DH and I met with BM to talk about SD's abundance of time with her (SD's) boyfriend and share our concerns about things we've learned/noticed about him. That part went okay - BM didn't really 'get it' until we started talking, but I think we made our points. Then DH broached BM's dating and pulling SD (and her sister) into it so early on. BM totally doesn't get it. She thought it would be best to let SD decide when she wanted to meet the new men. DH said no - this isn't a choice for her to make. It's not safe, it's not setting a good example. etc. I explained further than SD will look to her mom on dating since I am not, so we want to make sure she has a good picture of appropriate for age 14 dating. BM kind of laughed that she could be the what not to do role model, and I replied maybe SD doesn't need to meet all the 'misses' and just meet the 'hit' when you KNOW that he is - then she wouldn't have an idea that BM was doing something 'not to do.' BM thoughtfully seemed to agree with that. OH - I forgot to mention. Since last Monday - 7 days ago - BM dumped the guy from the weekend, met a new guy online and has seen him three times already - already took her other daughter to the zoo with his kids. Her theory, as she told us, is that her daughters are her world so she wants a potential BF to meet them right away. GOOD FREAKIN' GRIEF - seriously?? How about sheltering them from your need to get your hump on? Though the talk ended on a good note, she was understandably a bit put off. It wasn't easy to bring up her dating life, and we treaded very lightly. What left DH and I shaking our heads is how clueless and self centered she is . . . and the fact that she will NEVER see that. Just to listen to her is mind blowing. Me Me ME! I guess I feel a little better, but I know BM won't change. At least now we can tell a judge we tried if it comes to it. I just worry every day about what SD will pick up from her, and what I don't even know about that I can't counter-attack. Teen age girls are hard enough - teen age girls with a suddenly trampy, self centered mom are hell!! :)...See MoreNeighbors... don't even know where I'm posting this. Sorry. I'm new.
Comments (23)Sounds like a few possibilities- if daughter/grandkids moved in recently there must be no father on a continual basis. The boy may not understand that your house is no longer 'his' home. He may have witnessed/lived with a defiant/violent/drunk male in the past where this type of behavior is all he saw. Monkey See- Monkey Do. He may be ADHD. ADD. Fetal Alcohol Sydrome Disorder child. - 91-94% of ADHD/AUTISM is later diagnosed at early school age or adolescent age as FASD. ... It IS his mother who needs to set boundaries. Grandma already raised her kids- it is not her responsibility. Is the mother an alcoholic? Drugs? Physically or mentally abused and does not have the capacity herself to guide her children. You may not know these answers yet but dig. Ask grandma over or out for a hamburger. Discuss your worries with her and she may shed some light on the situation. Or not... It is not the child's fault, as much as it puts stress on you. Be proactive- lock your garage door. Lock your home doors. Ask a legal person if YOU may put a lock on the gate. Look at your County Clerk office tax assessment/file to see who legally put up the fence- you may be surprised to find out it is really your fence. Talk to your insurance company- they will have suggestions about how you can cover yourself. Most of these things are private and the neighbor's will not know of you trying to figure out the situation. Sometimes it DOES take a village to raise a child- especially a mentally affected child. I am blessed- I too have a connecting yard because two sisters and their husbands lived side by side. Then they were widows. I was able to know/visit the sister that previously owned my house for a year, before her death a few months ago at 100 years old... Her sister is my neighbor at 90, who is a wonderful woman. Don't dispair- there is a reason you are there. Figure out why as exhausting as it is right now. Chin up!...See Morenicole___
4 years agoglenda_al
4 years agoeld6161
4 years agomaifleur01
4 years agoKathsgrdn
4 years agolast modified: 4 years agomaifleur01
4 years agolast modified: 4 years agoElmer J Fudd
4 years ago
Related Stories
FUN HOUZZEverything I Need to Know About Decorating I Learned from Downton Abbey
Mind your manors with these 10 decorating tips from the PBS series, returning on January 5
Full StoryREMODELING GUIDESWhere Do I Start When Renovating My House?
Eager to get going on a project but not sure where to begin? Read this practical guide to getting started
Full StoryDECORATING GUIDESSay 'I Do' to Beautiful Wedding Memory Displays
You'll love and cherish these creative vignettes, artwork and more that keep the happiness of your special day at hand
Full StoryTHE POLITE HOUSEThe Polite House: What Can I Do About My Neighbors’ Trash Cans?
If you’re tired of staring at unsightly garbage way before pickup day, it’s time to have some tough conversations
Full StoryGARDENING GUIDESHow I Learned to Be an Imperfect Gardener
Letting go can lead to a deeper level of gardening and a richer relationship with the landscape. Here's how one nature lover did it
Full StoryLIVING ROOMSIdeabook 911: How Can I Make My Living Room Seem Bigger?
10 Ways to Make a Small Space Live Large
Full StoryDECORATING GUIDESThe Dumbest Decorating Decisions I’ve Ever Made
Caution: Do not try these at home
Full StoryFEEL-GOOD HOME12 Very Useful Things I've Learned From Designers
These simple ideas can make life at home more efficient and enjoyable
Full StoryWINTER GARDENING6 Reasons I’m Not Looking Forward to Spring
Not kicking up your heels anticipating rushes of spring color and garden catalogs? You’re not alone
Full StoryKITCHEN CABINETSWhy I Combined Open Shelves and Cabinets in My Kitchen Remodel
A designer and her builder husband opt for two styles of storage. She offers advice, how-tos and cost info
Full Story
KathsgrdnOriginal Author