Of course, you support her! - I speak with first hand experience. From the very get-go, I was told that each step along the way was my choice. Surgery? My choice. radiation? My choice. Life long pill therapy? My choice.....and that's where I drew the line. I armed myself with all the necessary info and chose to refuse infusions or pills due to the potential side affects. In my case, the lump was found very early, no lymph node involvement and I was very low on the "scale". I even waived regarding radiation, but inevitably did. I'm very comfortable in my decision and have come away with a whole new attitude toward the cancer "industry".

As to alternatives, there are those to be found, and it may just be that she eats in a different way, exercises more, etc.. Acceptance is very profound as is the diagnosis very traumatic. I wish her well and you as well in your support.

Thanks My 3, very informative articles.. I really don't know the exact particulars. I do know that she missed last year's mammogram. Which has me upset.

sc,irish I really don't know the exact particulars. I do know that she missed last year's mammogram. Which has me upset.

Not sure how long she's had that lump, what type of cancer she has, or what stage. It's not unusual for someone to miss a routine test such as a mammogram especially if they know something's wrong. Sounds crazy but they may simply be afraid to find out.

Recently, a friend was just diagnosed with breast cancer. She told me she had the lumps for a long time and did not go for her routine mammogram This lady works in Oncology at a children's hospital. I asked her why. She shrugged her shoulders. Sometimes people don't want to hear the words. The word cancer is very scary and rightfully so. It changes your life in many ways. In her case, she will require a double mastectomy. Scans were negative for metastasis. She'll be receiving Herceptin for chemo.

She may be in stage 1. I have 2 friends who had lumpectomies which were diagnosed as cancer. One elected to go on tamoxifen and one didn't. They are both here today after many years with no reoccurrence. TG.

Mamograms are very, very important. I hope more people read this thread.

Many of us could write about our experiences but every case is unique. There is so much more to consider - your cousin's age, family history, ethnicity, pathology results, what type of cancer, what stage. Has she discussed her concerns with her oncologist and asked about alternatives? A second opinion might help your cousin with these important decisions.

Support her but don't be upset with her for missing a mammogram.

My sister never missed her yearly mammogram, always clear. She found a lump that turned out to be cancerous, 4 months after her latest mammogram. She chose radiation and has been cancer free for over 20 years. Every case is different.

Marie, as I mentioned, her doctor recommends the usual treatments. She is looking for someone who believes in alternative medicine.

My cousin is 65, there is cancer in our family, not just breast cancer.

I am upset that this could possibly have been found a year ago. I know it is easy to forget when your life becomes busy. and Maddie, I agree that things can happen at any time.

She might want to look into proton therapy. We have a center here and I know a while back there was an article in our local newspaper on patients who had gone this route and I'm pretty sure there were some breast cancer patients.

I was cured of a very aggressive form of cancer (not breast) by way of conventional treatment so I'm biased in favor of it vs. alternatives. When I hear of people seeking alternative treatments I think of Steve Jobs who had one of the rare cases of pancreatic cancer that might well have been cured with surgery. Instead he chose alternative treatments. Stuff like that causes me not to even consider alternatives in lieu of proven treatments that are based on sound medical evidence.

People obviously have to make their own choices that they're comfortable with but you really hope they make a well informed decision based on the best facts available vs. an irrational decision. I can understand choosing not to have additional treatment if you have an early stage cancer where either no further treatment or extra insurance treatment is a "reasonable" choice. I can also understand opting not to pursue further treatment if it brings little to no hope of extending a quality life well into the future.

What I can't understand is opting not to pursue treatment that might offer a cure or a high chance of a considerably longer quality life in spite of some side effects and/or risks of treatment.

eld6161, I too would be angry about your cousin missing her annual mammo. Last night I had dinner with a friend who made that same choice. When she went for a mammo this year they found a lump, which she had surgically remove and she is now going through weekly chemotherapy. Her cancer tests positive for HER2, which is a more aggressive breast cancer. She has opted "full in" for conventional therapy. In two weeks the chemo ends and she starts daily radiation therapy.

Not only did my friend miss an annual mammogram, but once she received the diagnosis she went on a month-long vacation to Thailand. She told friends and family upon her return. Ugh!

I would support your cousin in her road to recovery, no matter what path she chooses.

A number of years ago I went for my annual mammogram and it was far from routine. Needed to have several additional scans. Then an ultrasound. While waiting for the results, I was beside myself because I had missed my annual exam the year before . I was beating myself up - if I have cancer it will be all my fault! Well, I didn't have cancer and I have not missed another mammogram.

Your cousin is likely having similar thoughts. She probably needs support without disappointment, anger or judgement. She is the one who has to live with the consequences of her decisions. I wish her the best and it sounds like she is fortunate that you will be there to support her on this journey.

3Katz has articulated my thoughts exactly and much better than I could have. What I found with my Mom and husband is that instead of making well informed choices they were deciding on impulse and out of fear of the unknown. But as my husband's doctor once pointed out to me, that's where a good advocate can really help. Your cousin may not be ready to hear about the hard stuff yet, but eventually maybe she will be and when she is, you can be there for her.

As for us, we have done everything that was proposed with conventional medicine and ended up integrating holistic medicine as needed. The primary things we did from a holistic perspective have included a strict diet free from animal protein, antibiotics and pesticides, we've added a lot of immune building foods to his meals, and he uses immune building supplements as well as natural remedies for the side effects from the chemo and pain mediciations. I was rather sceptical in the beginning but am amazed at how well it has all worked for him. I'll be happy to share more detail with you if you'd like, I've just posted it before and don't want it to hijack your thread.

My heart really goes out to you and your cousin. Cancer is a club that no one should belong to.

Thanks Lukkii, I would like to see the holistic information so I can share it with my cousin.

Years ago before Dr. Fuhrman became so commercial, our doctor was following the dietary information he was promoting. Fuhrman had started what he calls the Nutritarian Diet and coined the primary foods g-bombs (Greens, Beans, Onion, Mushrooms, Berries, Seeds). Like most diets, it's centered around eating healthy but g-bombs are foods that are good at supporting and improving the immune system.

Our doctor has been on the diet for several years, teaches it to his Resident Students from MSU and encourages his patients (especially those with chronic illnesses or cancer) to use the diet as well. He actually gave us a couple of books written by Dr. Furhman and referred us to his website which has a lot of helpful articles. Honestly? When I saw how commercial Furhman's site is, I thought the whole thing was hoaky and even told that to the Doctor. He encouraged me to look past that and to keep an open mind (and he was right). My husband figured he had nothing to loose by it and decided to give it a try.

Immediately we cut 95% animal protien, white sugar and synthetic sweetners out of his diet and the only oil I use to cook with is cold pressed olive oil. He uses milk in his coffee but I try to always buy organic or atleast antibiotic/hormone free. I pretty much cook everything home made so I can control the ingredients and avoid preservatives. My husband loves mushrooms, we put them in all his food, but the white ones at the store are not the best for immune building so we supplement his diet with Host Turkey Tail capsules (I found them on Amazon). The doctor suggested a few different herbs to help with energy because he'll always be on a low dose of chemo. There are natural supplements too that help with a variety of the issues one has when on pain medication or chemo. But I have to admit, what has really made the difference has been this diet. When he's gone off of it, he looks and feels awful, when he goes back on, his counts improve and he feels his best again. We were told to expect his remission to last for 2-3 years but we're in year 5 and his oncologist just told us this week, "it looks like he'll be coasting for a while". (Yeah!) Even though he has an impaired immune system and works in a hospital environment, he hasn't been sick with as much as a cold the entire time. It's completely exceeded our expectations.

There's no question that conventional medicine is the best defense against cancer, but not having an immune system afterwards is what really puts a patient at risk. This diet has been very instrumental in keeping my husband healthy and feeling the best he can feel. It's not a substitute for standard care, but it is a great tool to use in tandum.

Here is the link to Dr. Furhman's website, there's lots of articles some of which I hope will be of help. Also, please feel free to reach out with any questions. I'd share more, but some of it is just too personal to post here. You can always email me though at lukkiirish@gmail.com.

Dr. Furhman - Gbombs