Throw your artwork away? Now wait just a minute here! Do you have pictures of all of your artwork? With a digital camera or a good cell phone you can photograph and then organize your art and upload them to a photo site, then you can have a book made of your work. It would be satisfying to arrange your art books either by decade of your age, or by type (sculpture, painting, folk art, fiber, etcetera), or place, or even mood. It should be crystal clear that I really don't know what I'm talking about but I hope you get the idea. The point is that it is worth taking the time to create something that shows your treasured work, something that will bring you joy each time you look at it. Keep it simple and only take pictures of the art that you love.

Good question!

You pose a great question. Hubby and I joke that all we need is our can opener and our dinky Christmas tree. You just have to clear out the home of an elder (parents for me) to know the scalpel should have been brought out much earlier, so that's a lesson we are learning from.

No other close relation - cousins, niece/nephew, friends grown children? They may like to be part of your largess. Or some worthy organization. We donated our antique bedroom suite to an annual auction for an organization that helps troubled children. Recently donated over 500 books to a new community library in a small town 25-minutes away, and that's the second small community library we've donated books to. Donated children's books to an after-school program, a church library, symphony guild book sale, and Friends of the Library book sale. Some public libraries loan out art (paintings), so that might be a home for your art. So perhaps you need to think of some different avenues.

-Grainlady

There are nursing homes that would love to have artwork to liven up patients' rooms.

I am in this process. I am only keeping the things that I love. Ordinary items, duplicates or seldom used items are being donated or sold. A few items of furniture have been gotten rid of and I love the streamlined, uncluttered look I now have.

"Duplicates" and "seldom used" items are really the best place to start, in my experience. Did you wind up keeping any of your art? I'd hate to see that all be disposed of, but I have a few artist friends who find themselves tossing stuff out more often than not for personal reasons.

I think that to realize that your relatives may not want your stuff is very important. As another poster pointed out, they allready have what they want, so why do they need yours? And, as a friend once pointed out---your parents, grandparents, etc. had what they wanted, so I would have what I want. What I want may not be their stuff.

I find myself in that dilemma with so many of my things. My daughter and her husband are in danger of becoming overwhelmed with just their own stuff, much less do they need mine as well. My son and his wife have a lifestyle that would not suit much of what I have, so they don't need it or want it.

I joke about my coffee mug collection. I had hundreds of them. They were so much fun to collect. Most of them I paid no more than a quarter for. They have been culled back to a more manageable number, but still quite a few. I joke to my kids that I am going to leave them that and just what are they going to do with it? Really, they were not expensive and do not have any real value on their own. But, as a collection that spans a few decades, they are a fun collection. I outfitted an Ikea bookshelve with copper tubing and most of the cups are hung in this where they are on display. I get pleasure from passing them on my way upstairs.

There is great value in culling out your belongings as you get older. I am 65 and I find that I become more free with each truck load of stuff that moves out. It is not always easy to part with things that you once assigned value to. Yet, it is a very important move to make on your own while you are still capable of doing it for yourself.

I cleaned out my parents house and my FILs basement. It was very, very, very emotional to do. I don't want to do that to my kids.

Wow--I wonder about this all the time. I am divorced--no children--no intention of every marrying again (although I wouldn't mind a companion). I have a fairly large home for a solo. It is filled with items from parents and grandparents and other sentimental people in my life--every room. Some of it I love and some I just have because I have it. My house does not look cluttered. It's granny boho but pretty light and airy with white walls and hardwood floors. And, when something happens to my parents there will be even more sentimental treasures. I was thinking about taking photos of the important stuff and putting in a notebook with an album of what it is and who it belonged to so my nieces and nephews and perhaps even great nieces and nephews might consider taking it when I am gone. For example, I have the crock that my great grandfather made sauerkraut in--it's gorgeous but I keep dried flowers in it. Other items include my grandmother's 1936 high school yearbook and framed recipes from a great aunt. And, of course, they may want to hire a company to come in and sell everything lock, stock, and barrel and I won't know the difference.

All of those things need to be distributed out to the other family members, the nieces and nephews and cousins. It sounds as if you have some very personal things from your family. Unlike an object that you purchased at a yard sale, your kraut pot has a significance that is specific and unique to your family heritage. He was your great great, but he was also father and grandfather to others and must have other descendants.

Don't wait until they have to do it after you are gone. The significance of things such as the kraut pot will diminish and get lost. Personally assign it to someone, as long as they are receptive to it.

Why should you be the keeper of the family things? Edit them first to determine if they really have value to anyone else. Value can be such a subjective thing. If you can assign value to them, spread them out.

Even though the family branch of your parents has ended, they were part of a larger family tree and others might want to include the pictures in their ancestry records.

It is different when there are no direct descendants of your own to pass them down to. That is why it is important to extend out the ownership.

You might want to make sure that it is clearly understood just who is to get them, and by what means.

My mother's cousin, who married late in life and had no children, had in her possession the childhood dolls of my grandmother (1890's-1960's). She told me that she put my name on them for me,but when she died her husbands family came and cleaned out everything and none of them knew me and the request never got honored. They likely ended up in some flea market antique stall somewhere.

Think about those dolls and the relationships that they were assigned. First was the little girl who was my grandmother. (Actually, the first may have been my great grand, as they were likely home made dolls). She likely loved her little dolls and I know that she had very little. So, they must have been very special. Then, life happened for her. She had a hard life scratching out a living on the farm, raising kids farming. Where were those dolls then? Maybe stuffed into a drawer somewhere while she picked peas and sewed clothing for her family? Did she ever get them out and show them to her daughters? Then she lost her husband, old age and disease took over and she went to live out the rest of her days with her daughter. Where were the little dolls? At some point she gave them to her niece, not her own children. Or, someone else gave them away when they moved her out of her farm. Where were they? Did she sometimes look at them and remember when she got such pleasure from them?

They ended up with her niece who was already an older woman with no children. Where were they then? Sitting on a shelve with my name written on a piece of paper pinned to their body?

Where are they now? Lost and forgotten as is the little girl who once loved them. Both she and the significance that she gave to the dolls is all gone.

What value would they have been for me? I am not sure. I think that it would have made me think about her and her life if I had gotten them. After documenting my family tree on Ancestry, I feel more connected to those I never knew, or did not know well and to have and to hold a small piece of their life has new meaning.

On the other hand, if she had been a wealthy woman with lots of material possessions I am not sure that all of her material possessions would have the potential for value like that. But, she had very little. So, maybe we need to make the distinction between material wealth and those things that are truly personal and meaningful.

I have just a few things that I keep and that I take out once in a while and revisit what they once meant to me. They still give me a pleasure and an insight into who I used to be and where I thought that I was going at that time. I have put a little piece of me into the value that I have assigned to them. They are just little things, and are neatly stored. When I am gone they will become so much trash because their only value is what I believe it to be. When I am gone, so will be their value.

Gertie Daub--thank you for your kind and thoughtful response. I have really thought about what you wrote the last month or so. I am sorting out what is truly meaningful and I am going to start offering to my niece and nephew as soon as they purchase homes. Both live in studio apartments at the moment. They are living small to save for down payments. I'm going to take photos and write up the story behind the item. For example, I have a gorgeous deviled egg platter from great grandmother. I just copied her recipe and got a photo of her and I am going to gift it all as a package to niece as soon as she is settled. Thanks.

It's important to pass on things from our families' past. Sometimes a family possession can show us a new way of thinking about our ancestors. My great-grandmother had fifteen children. They had to leave school very early (my grandmother at 11) to go to work in factories. Never owned a house, never had any money. I knew it was hard, a bit easier when the children grew up, but with no extras.

So that was how I always imagined my great-grandmother's life.

Then, my mother's cousin told me that she had Grandmother Callahan's lemonade pitcher. I expected something completely utilitarian. But it's beautiful ruby glass with little flowers painted on. It once had matching glasses. It's in my china cabinet now, and every time I see it I am happy to know that my great-grandmother had something beautiful and fancy in her life.

I think the only way to know what things are valuable to your relatives is to ask them.
My relatives were farm people and most of their possessions were utilitarian. They didn't think any of that was worth preserving. They left their family the few luxury items they had. So I was left an amethyst ring. But it didn't fit me or go with modern styles so I unfortunately lost it when moving and never wore it. My mom got china she never used. The shame of it is my grandfather was an amateur woodworker who made lots of furniture and decorative items. I got a jewelry box my mom rescued from the stuff that was being thrown out. I still have it and think it's really cool and unique. It's geometric not flowery and he used different varnishes so some parts are smooth and others have an alligator skin texture. It's not something that anyone could buy in a store and that makes it special. Because it's rustic looking and wasn't pretending to be expensive it actually fits better with modern decor than a fine antique.
I'm guessing some of your nieces and nephews might be way more in to inheriting one of the artworks that might get thrown out rather than a space heater.

Give the items to whomever you wish or to the people who want them before your passing as, when that event occurs, they may never receive the items. I have learned this from experiences in my own family. Just writing someone's name on an item does not mean they will actually receive it. Sometimes, the people who actually end up with your items have no connection with you or your things. Again, from experience. Heartbreaking experience.

I made a what ended up being temporary move to Florida.

Best way to de-clutter, give away, sell and donate. But, now I have to buy new long johns and warm sweaters... just put yaktrax on my list.... of things to buy. It is getting cold here, dry so far, but cold.

I no longer have the Delft plates from Holland, the toy-box my father in law made for daughter number one, the toys from grand-kids from daughter number two.

Unfortunately I also got rid of some tools I am replacing... and have only one table cloth left.

BUT, when the day comes, my girls don't have to figure out what to do with all the STUFF!

I truly only have things left I like, or can and will use.

Moni

One must ask. What do I have in my home that you would like to have? This is important because of, for one thing, the difference in generations, and in taste for another. If you're not ready to part with something, put on it the name of the person who wants it. The older I get the more I crave comfort and ease with less and less interest in material objects, so I'm ridding myself of them in different ways - selling, donating, tossing. Do it so no one will have to do it for you.

If you find no one interested in your things, there are people that will come to your house and sell things for a percentage. They are Estate Garage Sellers. I believe they will hold the sale somewhere else if you don't want people coming to your home. If you want to just donate, many charity people will come and get your things......I know Amvets will and also Salvation Army.

It is sometimes pretty difficult to know what to do. What one of my cousins did, when they were downsizing, was take pictures of items they couldn't/didn't want to keep, added a description of the item, and emailed it to all the relatives. whoever said they wanted it first, got it. I ended up with my great great grandfather's music book, full of wonderful pictures. Sometimes interest in family items skips a generation as well. I came across a picture of one of my aunts who never married. She was born in the late 1800's. She and two of her sisters never married - maybe because the young guys were fighting in WWI? Anyway, I know nothing about her, because there is no one to tell anyone anything about her. I wish I knew something about her.

I have one wood chest dedicated to memories. It rarely gets opened, but I do feel good knowing the memories are in there. Most others I throw away or donate after I have had them for awhile.

I am doing a major decluttering now to make room for recent purchases. Read the Marie Kondo book to learn how to let go of stuff that does not "spark joy". I have been purchasing a lot of colorful dishes and decor to decorate the dining table with and it makes me really happy. I can change up the table when I feel like looking at a new color palette or theme. I love putting new combinations together - it makes the house feel like home, and gives me something new to look at when I feel like I need a change. Most importantly, it is a creative outlet.

So, it may not be memories that make you happy when you are older. It may be color, shape and form. Or scenery or photography. Or kitschy stuff. Or little toys, or flowers or candles or shiny things or antiques. It's ok to let go of stuff and replace it with new stuff. Down the road, you may want to replace the new stuff with different stuff. Anything you donate has the potential to make someone else happy for a time, then they may let it go, and so on, and so on.

Jane, great post! I know I tend to focus a lot on memories and keeping things that evoke good ones, but it is important to also live in the here and now. Visiting a memory is nice, but you can't live there.