I would dress and attend as if I was going to a "visitation" that is often held before a traditional funeral.

There might be photos of the deceased, there might be short eulogies, there might be prayers. But with the hours given, probably nothing too formal.

I wouldn't sparkle it up, but wouldn't wear something too casual.

ML

So sorry to hear this. I am assuming the celebration will be in the church's meeting hall, so that it can be an open house of sorts.

I attended a celebration of life for a terminally ill aunt. She was present at the event though.

I don't think I would wear anything bright unless requested. You can certainly wear a color. Since this is not a formal funeral, you will see people dressed all across the board. I am thinking those local will just stop by in what they happen to be wearing for the day.

You can't go wrong with a nice pair of slacks and a silk type blouse/top.

Magdalena, in your shoes I wouldn't go at all! One hundred miles for an "acquaintance?" I'd send a sincere note to the one person you know, her husband, and leave it at that.

I would wear a subdued color, just not anything bright, and plain jewelry. As ellendi said I think nice slacks and a nice blouse or top is fine or a simple dress or skirt.

I agree with Sheesh. I wouldn't go, but send a note.

I have been to a few of these, I think it's becoming more common. One was held outdoors and was extremely casual. They did have a brief program with a few speakers, but it was mainly people giving their condolences to the family. The others were at funeral homes and were slightly more formal. Again, it was similar to a viewing/visitation, giving condolences to the family, chatting with friends.

You could wear virtually anything in the dressy casual to semi-formal range, particularly because it's summer. I wouldn't wear anything bright unless it was requested.

I have been to a few of these as well. I tend to wear a black bottom of some sort and then a subdued but colourful or patterned top. I have learned to arrive a few minutes before the start time because there is often a greeting at the door, not as formal as a receiving line but something that makes it easy to say hello to whoever it is that you know. Speeches, etc are also usually at the beginning. There seem to be fewer and fewer people wearing all black.

I agree with Sheesh, too. I certainly would attend if it were in town, but for this distance and relationship, a card would suffice.

There's no question about going or not.

Okay, so I think I'll wear black pants, black sandals and a dark turquoise linen tunic. I'm still confused about the "come and go" part.

MagdalenaLee

"I'm still confused about the "come and go" part."

Like an open house. They listed the hours they will be accepting condolences, you're free to come between those hours. (They may only have the church available to them til the ending time, so,they want to be sure people don't stay too long.)

ML

It's really so nice of you to go. People remember it and appreciate. When in doubt, I always try to go to a funeral (alternative or otherwise).

I would wear whatever you want this is not casual. I personally wear black but then I have a lot of black so I wear it to a lot of things! But I think the word "celebration" means they'd rather not be somber.

ANd I suppose her loved ones still find much to celebrate about her, to their credit and hers, I suppose, after such difficulties.

Yes, I think the "come and go" part means like an open house.....i.e the celebration is from 1:00-5:00 and you come within those times and stay for as long or as little as you want.

We had a "Celebration of Life" service for my father, held at the assisted living facility where he had lived for seven years. We informed family and friends, but otherwise simply listed it in the newspaper with his obituary. These ceremonies are quite common in our area and are frequently referred to as a "Memorial Service", however we chose to celebrate my dad's life and to allow guests to speak about their memories of him. We wanted the tone to be upbeat, and to truly reflect my dad's personality.

We had a start time, but did not designate an end time, because we knew people would want to linger over food and have an opportunity to engage in conversation. We had a program and a Hospice Chaplin lead the service. She did a reading, my DH did a reading, I spoke, our daughters read a poem they had written, and then we opened it up for others to say a few words.

I am having a hard time with the "come and go" part of this, which is not a custom I have seen done, but would liken it to an "open house", which would take it down to a more casual celebration. As such, it frees you up to attend, pay your respects to her husband and depart when you feel the time is appropriate. I would certainly attend, given that you are a friend of the deceased's husband.

Wear something conservative and comfortable, but not overly colorful. What you have chosen sounds like a good outfit.

We have the means, the time, and the desire to go so a little awkwardness won't keep us away.

Thank you everyone. DH actually (partially) grew up in the same town, so he said we can go for some good BBQ and find the house he lived in when he was little if it turns out we only stay for a few minutes.

I think the dying person sometimes requests a 'celebration of their life' and no somber black be worn- but that would be stated on the notice... otherwise, I usually choose something black! seems appropriate to me I guess even if I'm celebrating the life they had lived...

every one I have been to was a 'program' of music, some close friends/family speaking, pictures, etc but did not include a religious ceremony, tho all but one was held in a church... I attended one for a musician who died of ca way too young... they had dubbed an audio tape of her playing several different instruments and singing a couple of original songs and played it during the ceremony.... it was unbelievably touching and beautiful. I have never been to a 'come and go' celebration of life, but it sounds like it will be set up more like a wake with no scheduled 'program'...

I think it's awesome you're going... showing/giving support to those who are grieving is so appreciated and much more meaningful than just receiving a card... what a heartbreaking occasion- addiction absolutely sucks... :(

Glad you are going. So many people do not attend funerals, receiving of friends, etc. anymore. I find that sad. The family (her husband) will appreciate that you made the effort.

We had a Celebration of Life service for my mother. As a christian, you don't believe that the end of your earthly life is a bad thing. It is, of course, sad for those left behind, but a time to rejoice in the afterlife of the deceased. My mom's service was a bit more formal in that we had a set time (not drop in) and was somewhat like a funeral service in how it was set up - but the tone was certainly different. My mom had chosen most of the music, who was to sing and who she wanted to speak. The pastors involved were well loved friends, one who had been a family friend for 40+ years. My brother and my sister both spoke about our mom and what she meant to us (there was no way I could ever do that, I am too emotional and have a hard time speaking in front of others LOL). My mom had been a member of her church choir for many years, and choir members (it was held at her church) both old and present, were invited to attend and sing - the choir loft was full. It was a testament to my mother and the live she lived, the people that she touched. I cannot tell you the number of people who came to us during the service and share stories of my mom and many who shared things my mom had done for them. Even though it was the hardest time of my life (my mom died of terminal cancer), the service was beautiful and memorable.

I've been to funerals, memorial services and celebrations of life and there is really not that much difference between them. The events held at churches are religious, of course, but almost all of them involve people saying nice things about the deceased, music, and what is known here as a "cold collation" of refreshments. I've seen dress vary from somber black suits to shorts and flip flops (really). I honestly think the important decision is to show up. If it's in a church, more black and closed toed shoes are better, but if the venue is anywhere else you could wear almost anything and no one would notice or complain.

(In our area of the country such arrangements are often still announced on the radio as " Mrs. Bessie Porter will be funeralized Saturday at Jessup's Funeral Parlor!")

I'm glad you are going. It will mean quite a lot to the husband I think, that you made the effort to come and be there. In our area, people are holding a 'Celebration of Life' quite often these days. We have been to several, and it seems a more relaxed, informal gathering of family and friends rather than a funeral held in a chapel, although sometimes there is both a service and a 'reception' if you will. And yes, some were dressed in suits and some were in casual shirts and pants.

The last one I attended was for an old childhood friend who died suddenly. He was also the widower of a dear friend who passed away of cancer about 5 years ago. There was a celebration of his life prior to the funeral service, which included a reception by his family and catered food served in the hall of the church. A lot of friends gathered and reminisced and those that wanted to stay for the service could then move to the chapel at the appointed time.