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The video of Judge beating his dtr..

14 years ago

Have you seen that on the news? It happened 7 years ago when the dtr was 16 years old. He strikes her multiple, multiple times with a belt & spews f'ing epithets. It goes on for 7 1/2 minutes. Dtr. posted it on Facebook & YouTube recently. They just showed on the news that the YouTube vid has had 1.6 million hits! Judge admits that it is him on the video.

He's been relieved of his duties for a couple of weeks while it is being investigated. Statute of limitations has passed, probably he won't be charged with anything.

Nevertheless,,,,,,,,,,, Methinks his career is OVERRRRRR!

Here is a link that might be useful: News story... it's not for the faint of heart

Comments (50)

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    They showed this on the news yesterday and today and it really bothers me. Hard to believe his work as a judge was involving child abuse cases. The daughter's crime certainly didn't deserve that kind of punishment but I have to wonder who was taking the video and not trying to stop this assault.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    yes since it happened near here it has been all over the news, all of the Houston news channels are having commentary about it. It is horrible, I could barely watch just the parts they showed on the news and they only showed a little. What gets me is that the MOTHER is standing there watching and cheering on the father as he beats the child unrelentingly with a huge belt then she holds that belt as he walks off to get another belt, one apparently was not enough.

    and what did she do you ask, this child downloaded a game on to her computer, for that she got beat severely and it was apparently a regular thing the beatings .
    She had this happen to her so often that she had put a hidden camera in her bedroom in case it happened again. She did not tell or show it till now, she is 23 yrs old now. That poor girl!!!

    AND he is/was a judge that saw cases on child abuse!!
    POT MEET KETTLE

    they are discussing his dismissal UM HELLO what about his prison time? Put him in with some inmates that can show him what it feels like.

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  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    A spanking is a hand on a butt, not a belt on any handy part of the body, including potentially the poor girl's face at one point. No way is this "discipline", it is abuse pure and simple, and that judge is completely wrong in his "excuses". So he apologised, big whoop. He should be disbarred and charged with assault on a minor.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    In the 50's/60's this would be a non issue.
    DH got the belt when he was young. My parents didn't use implements except once when my brother got a good hard whipping for vandalism.
    DH and I decided early on that although spanking was OK no implements would be used. They never were and we spanked so infrequently I could count on the fingers of one hand.

    I think spanking a teenager by any means is ridiculous. But again it was quite the norm back in the day. Pat Boone spanked his girls until adulthood.

    That said: This little piece of work set her father up. The belt was the means of punishment used in her home. She got caught stealing (a federal crime BTW) and knew she would in for it. So she sets it up. Then she "fights" and dramatizes her punishment to prolong it for the camera.

    Mother is fine with the punishment until now. Daughter according to other articles out there chooses to live with abusive dad over mother after the parents divorce.

    Daddy gets tired of slacker daughter who drops out of school and tries to give her incentive to straighten up by telling her he's taking the Mercedes and nice allowance away. DD pulls out the video. That'll fix him.

    Yep Mom now is a victim, daughter is a victim. BOO HOO. Let's hit the talk shows.

    These "women" are a real piece of work. Shame on them.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Of course I think that the beating is wrong, even tho I do believe in parental rights for corporal punishment. I want to know why the tape is being brought to the public now, the statute of limitations on this have past. In other words I want to know the rest of the story. Matt Lauer asked the question but it was nothing but rambling prattle, a non answer. The mom looks like she is a bit spacey, everything she said sounded like sour grapes.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Wildchild I agree with your post!!

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    All potential charges were dropped against him, because it happened so long ago. She has to file against him, and so far she hasn't.

    He should be removed from the bench, immediately, regardless of any charges (or not).

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    That's not a spanking..that's a beating.

    He was totally in the wrong.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I don't care what her motive is. He was committing child abuse.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I do not in any way think the father's (and mother's) actions were in anyway right. Like someone said, a bare hand on the butt is a spanking, what was done to this girl was beating, pure and simple. Wrong, wrong, wrong!! But I have to suspect her reasoning for bringing it to attention now. Like Wildchild said. The girl chose to live with daddy after the divorce, is lazy and feels untitled to continue live on daddy's money and drive the swanky car daddy bought for her. The story is not a simple one. There is a lot of wrong to go around.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    It was horrible to watch, but the belt was used when we were growing up also. Absolutely not like that! Like OP's said, I could count on one hand how many times it was actually used.

    And although I think this seems excessive, 7 1/2 minutes, wow, I also agree with Wildchild. We don't know the whole story. And why did she wait til now? Just my two cents, which is worth less than that, it's past the statute of limitation, so dad can't be charged but daughter can ruin him. And get her 15 minutes of fame.

    We really are only getting one side of the story for now. What an f'ed up family.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    My husband just told me that there was a story on MSN about her. The dad had cut back her 'allowance' because she quite college, she threatened him and so the tape was released. That doesn't make the beating alright, but it tells a bit of a story about the daughter.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I can't believe anyone could condone what that monster did to that girl. Also, the girl has cerebral palsy, and while she may appear "normal" she is not. I think that has to be taken into consideration. This is not your average disillusioned twenty-something. While I think she released the tape to exact some type of revenge against her father, the fact of the matter is that he brutally beat her for her theft.

    And, yes, I was punished with a belt when I was a kid. One time my Dad beat me with the belt and I had bruises up and down the backs of my legs. Today, he would probably be arrested. But I deserved the beating. I do think my Dad felt bad at what he did, but again--I deserved it. I did something much worse than illegally download a video game, though.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I saw part of it.. We will never know the real story about this

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Nobody ever deserves to be beaten or humiliated, no matter what the crime.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    wildchild, I kind of thought what you were thinking. Of course the dad is a scmuck but...

    I wondered why she leaked the video the way she did. Really... years later.. to the public? If she needed to talk or wanted an opinion, why not show a girlfriend, boyfriend, close aunt or counselor? If she thought it was abusive, why not just take to the police? But the, as an adult... -I just wanted to get opinions on it or whatever-- didn't sit well with me.

    I also wonder about time of releasing of the video. Why wait so long? Somebody mentioned the statue of limitations was up for her dad, but I also wonder if that statue of limitations wasn't for up for her for taping someone without their knowlege (which I 'think' may be illegal to do even for victims). I know it's petty to pick on a so called victim but I'm just not understanding her rationale for doing what she did when she did it. It seems like things were orchestrated and it seems too calculated to be a typical innocent victim.

    I think there's a lot more to the story.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    It sounds as if the whole family is disfunctional at the very least, but that's not really the issue. I'm pretty sure a kid raised in that environment would be screwed up. You reap what you sow.
    And, in the end, it does not matter why she released the tape, or when or if she is a spoiled brat or not. What matters is that the judge did violently beat his daughter. I certainly would not want him as judge in my county.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    She probably released the video because of an argument with him and the fact that she is no longer afraid of him. If this happened frequently she would have been to afraid to report him.

    If she was just downloading a song from the internet, legal or not, she didn't deserve that beating. There are better ways to punish a child. Taking her PC would have been better.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I kind of agree with wildchild. My dad used a belt also. He always prefaced it with "This hurts me more than you". I always wanted to say then why don't you give me the belt and let me hit you. I really only got hit a couple of times and I did scream more than it hurt so he would stop, and I never got hit as a teenager. My father was a disciplinarian when we were younger but he was actually pretty easy when I was older and dating. No curfew.....he always said if he hadn't done his job by then, it was probably too late now. It did help that I was a good kid. LOL. As wildchild said, that was not uncommon for the 50's and 60's. I don't think it was right, but there's greater problems here. I wondered, too, what kind of sickie would take such a video until I watched it. That explained a lot.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Sleeperblues: I can't believe anyone could condone what that monster did to that girl.

    -and-

    I had bruises up and down the backs of my legs. Today, he would probably be arrested. But I deserved the beating.

    Sleeper, you confuse me. Your statements seem contradictory. ???
    I don't think you "deserved" a beating, no matter what you did.

    I agree with Sherrmann... no one should beaten.

    I think having lived under Judge's tyranny & abuse for years, obviously there are going to be deep seated psychological issues with the dtr, as well as the mother. How could it be called a "set up"? She'd been down the beating road in the past & could tell it was coming & knew she could catch it on video. That's no set up, imo. I seriously doubt that she was thinking of how to "dramatize" it while that belt was being whacked all over her body. He wanted to whack her butt to conceal his crime. So he had premeditation right there.

    And we have no way of knowing WHEN the mother made her amends with the dtr for her participation in this, or any other, abuse that occurred. I doubt it is "just now". And just because the father gave dtr. a car & paid for college.... that is supposed to neutralize the fact that he is a violent abuse??? Sound more like manipulation to me.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    You know, I originally just watched the clip that was shown here... but I have since watch the longer video on youtube and do think he was overly violent and abusive beyond just belt punishment.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    The daughter might be "playing " him now but this was a vicious beating and he deserves to be taken off the bench. It went on for seven minutes and apparently it was routine or the camera wouldn't have been there, Regardless of her motives the father is a sociopath. NO ONE beats any one as he did his own flesh and blood. I grew up when it was okay to spank a kid. I got a slap on the face once by my father for a wise ass crack I made, and I have never ever forgotten it or forgiven him. I can't imagine getting this kind of treatment by parents.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Not contradictory. My father would never have beaten me like that monster beat that girl. My punishment was probably about 5 whacks with the belt, and there is where I agree with Wildchild. The type of punishment I received was par for the course back then. Now I'm not saying every parent punished their kid that way, but many many did. And trust me, I deserved it. I was a brat.

    I don't know how anyone could watch that video and think those were the actions of a normal, loving parent just disciplining their child. And the fact that he has a job which gives him power over other people's lives? That is not right.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Thanks for your response, Sleeper. I agree it was often par for the course, "back then" to use a belt. While you may have richly deserved punishment, it's the bruises you did not deserve, imo.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I also watched this on u-tube, and found it to be disgusting. This was more than punishment. This was abuse!
    Not only physical abuse, but perhaps even worse was the verbal, and emotional abuse.He told her she did not deserve to live in his house. What kind of thing is that to say to your OWN child.
    Like many here I was a child growing up in the 50's and 60's and did recieve spankings,(be right or wrong)but this was WAY beyond that! This was a crime!

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I never heard of any parents using a belt when I was a child or now.
    It's barbaric.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I was raised where spankings were the norm IF DESERVED.
    This is also in the day where the teacher would slap misbehaving students on the hands with a ruler.

    I got spanked with a fly swatter, and with a bare hand, but as everyone here has said, this is way over the top. This is not discipline, but abuse.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    My dad, and most of my friends' dads, were not opposed to using a strap. I don't consider any of them to be barbarians. We don't have children but if we did they would also be punished. But they would not be beat.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I have re-watched the video too. I still believe she was playing to the camera. We don't really know what would have happened had she not "fake fought" her punishment so hard. Maybe she was told you will lay across your bed and take 3 or 4 licks. She pushed his buttons and he became more enraged. In the video he is yelling and shouting and "seems" out of control but his strikes are aimed at her butt. She is the one dramatically twisting away and screaming.

    Several of the hits are not even on her but he is hitting the chest or nightstand behind her. Those the the thumps in the video.

    Really if he was truly out of control he would have simply grabbed her forced her down on her face or and smacked the hell out of her. He would not be "chasing" her around the room swinging the belt at her butt. A truly abused kid would have been snatched bald by the end for fighting back. A kid who had regular beatings with a belt would be bending over that bed immediately. Not arguing.

    Like I said in my earlier post I wasn't hit with a belt as a kid nor did I hit mine. But I grew up in a neighborhood of kids who got it regularly for misbehavior of almost any kind. The Catholic family next got it on the bare behind with a ruler. The kid across the street got his dad's belt in the garage when dad got home after misbehaving. I had a little friend who didn't want to go to school. His mother herded him down the block to the bus smacking his behind with a purse strap from an old handbag. Friend at the roller rink was hauled into the bathroom by her mom and came out with stripes on her legs by way of a clothes hanger after she sassed her. None of these kids felt abused. None would be fighting back like the at girl in the video. In some schools corporal punishment was handed out.

    Being how she acts today I can only imagine how she behaved back then. Any of you deal with out of control teenagers?
    she had been apparently warned about her pirating previously. We d only have her and her bitter mother's word that whupping with the belt were the usual thing. For all we know it was the last straw. Why are there no other videos? Why just this time? We have no idea what the discussion was before. it could have been well "this time you're getting a good old fashioned butt whupping since nothing else seems to work". So she sets up the camera.

    It's re-election time and also news has leaked that the judge and his wife are in a custody battle ($$$$$) over his younger daughter who apparently has not been beaten.

    I'm sticking to my original thought. Much more to the story. Spoiled brat who wasn't abused and crossed the line. Vindictive mother using daughter to help her get back at dad. Wonder what mommy dearest promised her.

    In the video below there is talking before. Someone say something to the effect that she isn't understanding what a big deal it is.. I assume the piracy.

    Also the video below is more complete. Note how immediately after the "hysteria" when the parents leave the room the brat gets up and calmly checks the video camera.

    Here is a link that might be useful: Daughter Sets Up Dad.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    " A kid who had regular beatings with a belt would be bending over that bed immediately. Not arguing."

    I wholeheartedly disagree with that statement. I was beat with a belt for the slightest infraction when I was a kid, by both parents. As someone said above, I will never forgive either one of them for that. If you have been beaten before and you know it's coming, you will fight scream, argue, whatever it takes to try to stop it. You would not just calmy lay down and take it "like a big girl".

    For that reasonI have NEVER spanked my child other than a smack on the diaper when he ran away from me at a park and right in the path of a metal merry go round. I think it teaches the child to be angry and violent and resent the parents. I also think that the only thing you accomplish is showing him/her than you are bigger and stronger than they are so they should fear you. The last thing I would want is for my son to fear me.

    And lastly, you wouldn't walk up to a stranger and slap the snot out of them because they did something you didn't like so how and why would you do it to someone you love? I can't imagine physically hurting the most precious person in the world, my son, on purpose.

    As far as the rest of the story, and I'm am sure there is one, that will come out and her releasing this tape will probably backfire on her and her Mother.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Spoiled brat who wasn't abused. I disagree! Don't know how anyone could think that was not abuse.

    Vindictive mother using daughter to help her get back at dad. I agree!

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I didn't watch the video, I saw part of it on the news. I was beaten. I didn't deserve it. I didn't deserve bloody whelps and bruises.

    Her motives? You question her motives? I know many of you dislike Oprah, she says, "It changes who you are."

    This was a child. It changes who you are.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I do believe the girl was beat by both parents. That is very troubling but why did the girl forgive the mom? And why did the girl release this now? What good would it possibly do to release this on Youtube? I don't believe I was beat as a child (I did get spankings) but I did grow up in a dysfunctional home with an alcholic father and drug addicted brother. I was emotionally abused for sure. There's no way I would have released a video of the beating or the verbal abuse. I did not want anyone to know about it. I'll talk about it a bit now but no way would I show it to strangers over the internet. That's very strange to me. But I do believe that she was beat.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Wildchild posted:
    I have re-watched the video too. I still believe she was playing to the camera. We don't really know what would have happened had she not "fake fought" her punishment so hard. Maybe she was told you will lay across your bed and take 3 or 4 licks. She pushed his buttons and he became more enraged. In the video he is yelling and shouting and "seems" out of control but his strikes are aimed at her butt. She is the one dramatically twisting away and screaming.
    Several of the hits are not even on her but he is hitting the chest or nightstand behind her. Those the the thumps in the video.
    I watched the 7+ minutes, too looking for the things you "saw". FAKE FOUGHT??.... obviously you've never been beat with a belt. You don't just stand there. You RESIST! You twist & scream. Hillary Adams has ataxic cerebral palsy. No way could she have escaped this monster. You made up the "3or 4 licks".... nothing like it in the video. She pushed his buttons, you say, & conclude it is HER fault he then lost control. She was the victim in this beating. You blame the victim. He should have control of himself. I counted 17 of his belt strikes. I heard none that seemed to hit anything but Hillary. She screamed in pain with each one. How do you rationalize the many many hits that are right there on camera, undisputedly making their mark?? And what about his verbal diatribe. I suppose that is ok with you also? The physical pain leaves, the emotional pain is still there, 7 years later.

    WC:
    Really if he was truly out of control he would have simply grabbed her forced her down on her face or and smacked the hell out of her. He would not be "chasing" her around the room swinging the belt at her butt. A truly abused kid would have been snatched bald by the end for fighting back. A kid who had regular beatings with a belt would be bending over that bed immediately. Not arguing.
    He DID "smack the hell out of her" with his belt. Ditto Magic/Az.

    WC:
    Like I said in my earlier post I wasn't hit with a belt as a kid nor did I hit mine. But I grew up in a neighborhood of kids who got it regularly for misbehavior of almost any kind. The Catholic family next got it on the bare behind with a ruler. The kid across the street got his dad's belt in the garage when dad got home after misbehaving. I had a little friend who didn't want to go to school. His mother herded him down the block to the bus smacking his behind with a purse strap from an old handbag. Friend at the roller rink was hauled into the bathroom by her mom and came out with stripes on her legs by way of a clothes hanger after she sassed her. None of these kids felt abused. None would be fighting back like the at girl in the video. In some schools corporal punishment was handed out.
    You almost sound like you think you are an "expert" because you knew kids who were beaten. How many beatings did you actually witness? How would you KNOW that these kids didn't feel abused? You obviously feel no compassion for anyone who was beaten. Why would the kids you knew confide in you their shame, humiliation & innermost feelings? Clue: They.would.not.

    WC:
    Being how she acts today I can only imagine how she behaved back then. Any of you deal with out of control teenagers?
    she had been apparently warned about her pirating previously. We d only have her and her bitter mother's word that whupping with the belt were the usual thing. For all we know it was the last straw. Why are there no other videos? Why just this time? We have no idea what the discussion was before. it could have been well "this time you're getting a good old fashioned butt whupping since nothing else seems to work". So she sets up the camera.
    Right @ the beginning of the video the mother says, "I already spanked her." I suspect this was an attempt by mom to divert the Judge from feeling like he needed to punish Hillary, as in "I've taken care of this." But nooo, Judge knew that mom was incapable & would be "too easy", not giving Hillary as many nor as hard as the Judge. Hillary DID lay down so her mom could whack her butt, probably because she felt she could trust mom, not to lose control & that it was a "sacrifice" hit, to keep Judge from beating Hillary even more. All the more evidence that this was not the first time he'd lost control of himself & beat the $h!t outta her. He witnessed that butt whack, but was that enough? Noooo! He had to tie into her all over again with the belt. Then he polishes of the beating with his verbal abuse (along with all the f'ing he had thru out). And all this is Hillary's doing ... Hillary's fault according to you!

    WC:
    It's re-election time and also news has leaked that the judge and his wife are in a custody battle ($$$$$) over his younger daughter who apparently has not been beaten.
    Wrong! The judge is NOT up for re-election now. He was elected to a 4 yr term, LAST year! I know nothing about the custody battle. So you think the Judge should get the minor dtr, huh?

    WC:
    I'm sticking to my original thought. Much more to the story. Spoiled brat who wasn't abused and crossed the line. Vindictive mother using daughter to help her get back at dad. Wonder what mommy dearest promised her.
    It's truly amazing how you are judging, making assumptions & drawing conclusions negatively against the mother,,,,, based on what evidence? And the 7+ minutes of a maniac beating his impaired dtr leaves you totally unmoved. Simply astounding.

    WC:
    In the video below there is talking before. Someone say something to the effect that she isn't understanding what a big deal it is.. I assume the piracy.
    You've often given the impression that you've always been one to "test the limits", not just as a (wild)child, but also as an adult. So you think piracy is such a horrific crime that striking a child 18+ times with a leather belt is justified. How much cleaner, simpler, & effective to just remove the horrible computer (yeah, they blame the computer, too) from the home.

    WC:
    Also the video below is more complete. Note how immediately after the "hysteria" when the parents leave the room the brat gets up and calmly checks the video camera.
    Hillary left the room because her mom ordered her to sleep on the couch (on orders from the Judge). Where do you get off calling Hillary a "brat"? How do you know that? Based on what? You do not know that she "checks the video camera"......... she did not stand directly in front of it as a person would "to check it". She was off to the side, in camera view & went out of side, apparently thru the door.

    I'm sure that Hillary has received much support & sympathy for what the video tape that so explicitly shows what pain she endured as a child. But then there are those such as you, Wildchild, who not only have not a scintilla of empathy, sympathy or compassion for her, but go even further & BLAME her for all of dad's dysfunctional behavior. That just defies my understanding.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    JMHO You are welcome to yours. I am not the only one who smells something rotting in this story.

    Yes she is still acting out today. She still is being evasive with her answers to questions asked of her about why she decided to do this now. She is not a nice girl. Talented and bright but a manipulate BRAT!!!!

    I suggest you Googl3e a bit and learn what illegal downloading can get you in the way of fines and yes even time, As a judge her father stood to loose a lot by her "minor" offense.

    Yeah. I pushed the limits as a kid too. But I will say this:

    Never have I been a thief and I got into far more trouble through being honest than a liar. I can't stand liars or thieves. I especially can't stand manipulative little barbie dolls of any age.

    You don't like me. I get that. I'm probably not like you but I don't judge those I don't know. I getting the picture though. Enjoy sweetie.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    DD told me about the video last night and brought it up on YouTube. DH and I watched it and it hit very close to home for him. He was beaten on a regular basis by his father all through his childhood. Not just with a belt, but with fists too. Of course, as others have said, in the 50's and 60's too many people just looked the other way. Teachers ignored the bruises and broken bones, even when he told them what happened. Thought he was a great story teller when Dad told them he was just a clumsy kid. Then DH rebelled, got into lots of trouble in order to "punish" Dad. When brought before a judge and got to tell his story, the judge admonished Dad and threatened him, but the abuse continued.

    DH pointed out the mother's behavior in the video, saying that it was just like his mom. Afraid to have the abuse turned on her (which often did occur), she would point out that she had tried to reason with the child, but had been ignored. As others have said, we will never know the whole story, but in many cases the abuse to DH was triggered BECAUSE Mom had seen a beating coming her way and diverted it with comments about something DH had done that needed correcting.

    And I don't think the girl played to the camera at all. I thought she made a herculean effort NOT to over-dramatize. She may be, as some of you say, a spoiled brat. Maybe Dad gave her nice things to compensate for the beatings (to assuage his guilt). And maybe she feels she deserves all those nice things for the same reason. And maybe she wants revenge and that's why the video is out there.

    I don't care if the daughter did set that up, and it doesn't even matter that she has a health condition - NO PERSON deserves to be beaten like that!

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    " I'm probably not like you but I don't judge those I don't know."

    That is EXACTLY what you did by judging this girl. Unless you have been in this situation you have no idea what you are talking about. NONE.

    May I suggest that You get aquainted with Google too. Almost every single mass murderer, violent criminal, sex offender, etc, in prison was a victim of some sort of serious abuse as a child.How do I know that? I did my college thesis on this very subject. You have no idea what you are talking about. Not a clue.

    Abuse changes every single thing about who you are. The lack of control over the situation,the fear, the lack of security, the total betrayal from those who are supposed to love you. It's devastating to a child.

    Read the book "Somewhere A child Is Crying" by Vincent J. Fontana and maybe you will learn a little something about the effects of beating and abusing children.

    And you are blaming a 17 year old child for being a brat? Or is she just an out of control teen? Either way you are justifying his behavior?

    Unreal.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Tell me. If this child was so abused how come she chose to live with daddy after the divorce?

    Why is their a custody battle allegedly going on?

    Little sister could speak up about the abuse that went on in the home.

    Why does Hillary keep waffling on her reasons for bringing
    this video out now? She seems really poised and articulate. Until questioned. Even a softball question.

    No one is justifying his behavior. But I am not ready to think it is right to ruin the man's life over a single parental bad moment.

    I truly believe she set him up and I truly believe there were a lot of crocodile tears involved. Others have commented on other sites who were spanked with belts as kids said the same thing. My own DH who had a harsh father (by my standards) said the same thing.

    Ever since the 80s everyone is a victim. Anything wrong in your life it's because a.you were abused (including verbal abuse) or b. molested. Even if it never happened.

    When asked if this was a regular occurrence she got a deer in the headlight look and came up with some BS hesitant sentence like um um "for a time". Mom just sat there like a stone dummy. Well maybe that for a time was for an out of control teen who was on the way to real trouble. Her father tried to do something about it.

    An out of control teen IS a brat. A grown women who brings forth this kind of thing and then doesn't "own" her action is still a brat.

    Videos can be made to look worse than they are. Through volume,lighting etc. Watch the video without sound.

    I grew up in a different era. Kids did come to school with bruises and unexplained injuries. No one is condoning that.

    But even the so called experts have stated that even with today's laws he did not cross the line even though he came quite near. She wasn't injured. She wasn't even hurt that much. DH commented that the guy used a thick belt. I do remember my friends saying that if they were told to get a belt they always picked the thickest. Made a lot of noise and hurt less than a thin one. LOL

    Sorry you are angry and resent your parents Magic. But there are a whole lot of others from my generation who don't resent their. And I don't buy that you do anything to get away. The kids I knew said it was always easier if they just took the punishment. Including my DH who did not hit our kids either except for a smack on the butt now and then to get their attention when they were young.

    My dad was a kind-hearted man. A father before his time when it came to helping out around the house. But the day he came home to the cops there about my brother( the three 10 year olds flooded a neighbors basement on purpose with a garden hose) he looked much like the man in the video. Yelling screaming at my DB how stupid, ungrateful etc. he was. He was pizzed! He had a temper and it came out that day. My brother and I talked about it some years back. Brother laughed and said what he hurt the worst was the kid who didn't get a whipping. He and the kid next door were crying while they got their butts beat and the kid across the street was out playing. He remembered that the most. Our parents weren't perfect. But we forgave them their errors. because we knew we were loved. That girl has a dad who loves her. That is why he is so frustrated. But people will twist his motive because we have a "female" victim here. Oh wait she's "disabled" too.

    Wonder if the outcry would have been the same if it was a teen-aged boy who jacked a car. Then came out 7 or 6 years later with the video. Especially if said young man wasn't as attractive as this young woman with her perfectly coiffed,highlighted $150.00 hair. If the the 23 year old young man was say someone with a visible tattoo or a piercing we didn't approve of. Ummmm. Food for thought.

    Or lets make it a woman who is obese in a tank top with a rose tat on her breast and her boyfriend's name on her neck with a lip ring. Would she be getting the same sympathy as Hillary? I could just see it now. On Jerry Springer..... "I'm not trying to blackmail daddy. I just want him to get help." Yep. Everyone would be outraged all right.
    Battering and abuse is wrong. But all corporal punishment is not that. That is something the older generation understands. We knew the abused kids from the ones who got spanking or whippings. Now days some believe speaking harshly to a child is abusive. If all one did was speak harshly all the time of course it would be. But if the kid is being a pill maybe someone needs to yell good and loud at them.

    Sorry but I cynical when it come to things like this. Fame hos pizz me off. This is not what it seems. My gut reaction. If I'm wrong I'll own it. But I don't think I am.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Like I said WC, you have no idea what you are talking about. NONE.

    I am not saying she doesn't have a motive, nor do I care what her motive might be, I am just saying that beating your child with a belt is WRONG. Period.

    And don't put words in my mouth WC. I don't resent my parents, I just won't ever forgive them of that and neither will my 3 brothers. You talk about a one time incident with your brother and it's all fun and games. Good for you but it's not the same as living in a house where that is the norm.


    " And I don't buy that you do anything to get away. The kids I knew said it was always easier if they just took the punishment."

    All I can do with that statement is shake my head at your ignorance. You said yourself you were never hit but yet you continue to argue about things you know nothing about. Unreal.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Tell me. If this child was so abused how come she chose to live with daddy after the divorce?

    If you change the relationship from daughter to wife, you might know of situations where an abused wife doesn't leave her husband.

    Abuse is not just physical damage, it's combined with the far more dangerous mental abuse - because the abuser tells their victim that they ask for it.

    If you read up on spousal abuse, you will find that many abused wives who do not leave were physically abused as children.

    Raise a child with abusive behavior, and that child will accept abuse as their lot.

    I think, this man should be disbarred and removed from the bench. I find it interesting that an abuser makes their career in family court. Allows him to enjoy his perversion.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    "You don't like me. I get that."
    You do employ a lot of smoke & mirrors to uphold your argument, Wildchild. What has my liking you, or not, have to do with the discussion? With anything?? I don't even KNOW you.

    And your, "I'm probably not like you but I don't judge those I don't know." is almost laughable. You most certainly have JUDGED the JUDGE, Hillary & her mom.....all over your every post, here & elsewhere. But you are probably right about the first part of your statement,,, you've given a lot of evidence that "you're not like me". That's fine with me.

    But even the so called experts have stated that even with today's laws he did not cross the line even though he came quite near. Which "so called experts"? You, your dh, your childhood friends? Again, you just throw stuff out there hoping something will stick, lots of it patently false, lots of it not even germane to the discussion all to support your "I truly believe..." But even the local police Chief Tim Jayroe has punched a hole in your statement:

    "We believe that there was a criminal offense involved and that there was substantial evidence to indicate that and under normal circumstances ... a charge could have been made," Jayroe said. He said the district attorney determined he couldn't bring charges, and that police would discuss the case with federal prosecutors even though he doesn't believe federal charges would apply.

    Yep, Wildchild, you're entitled to "believe" & to your opinions, but please stick to the facts,,,,,, sweetie.

    _____

    I'll admit, the lack of enlightenment out there in the world as regards child abuse has been startling to me. I would never have dreamed that so many would give someone such as this Judge a pass.

    Magic, I am so sorry you suffered at the hands of those who should have been protecting you. And likewise for your dh, Donna, and Kim/OK and all the others who were abused. And I am sorry you are hurt yet again in discussions such as this.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Guess we'll just have to wait and see how this plays out. You guys should check out her twitter.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Oh, please tell us what she said. I don't do twitter.

    Can I read the twitter without having an account? How do you do that?

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I won't jump in to the fray, y'all seem to be doing a great job covering this mess. But I did listne to only part of the tape on the radio and have no desire to go watch it.

    BUT, The radio host said that the girl said she posted it
    because she did not want her father to be re~elected. I don't think that that is being hidden at all.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I have passed this thread many times bacause the subject and the video I have not watched just pains my heart. I am 76 and grew up with beatings...either mine or my sisters. And when my out of control daughter at age 15 and 16 pushed me to the edge, I beat her with a belt. I told her I would do it, and she stayed out all night with a druggie guy....so I did it. I write this with tears in my eyes because for many years now (and having raised many children since...no spankings) I do know that corporal punishment DOES c;hange who you are. But, at the time, it was what I knew., I am so grteful for the things I learned about myself after those years...the Donahue's and Oprah's who reached at least some people to change lives. My 3rd child...never has had a spanking of any kind and I do keep hoping that this age of enlightenment would reach more mothers and fathers when it come to disipline. So much of what Wildchild is so true....and the other side of the coin where No child or person deserves to be hit or beaten of verbally abused. Our society IS growing in awareness and sometimes an event such as this brings the topic to the forefront and learning from the discussion is what makes people change.I doubt that "the judge' is a monster....just someone who does not know better or Did not know better.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    Interesting.

    I'm a therapist. I work with families and see lots of abuse. Part of what perpetuates abuse is justification of it.

    He has to "own" that he chose to deal with his frustrations in a physically abusive manner. Our society simply cannot condone that under any circumstances. If we do, that is one very slippery slope.

    Under what circumstances is he justified? None, in my opinion. Buck stops with him -he was the "adult." There are many alternative ways to deal with highly difficult children. Physical abuse is not, and never has been, a good option.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    "in many cases the abuse to DH was triggered BECAUSE (his) Mom had seen a beating coming her way and diverted it with comments about something DH had done that needed correcting."

    I was my mother's favorite scapegoat;
    I got beaten when she wanted to beat me;
    it had nothing to do with anything I did or did not do.

    I am nearly 60 years old, & I still feel terrible guilt about an incident that happened when I was about 4;
    one 2-year-old brother was raking in the garden, & his twin & I were playing together.

    Somehow, I can't remember how, I hurt my brother, ran into him with a toy or something, & my mother came raging out of the house with her nostrils flared & her teeth set & her enraged look on her face, razor strap in her hand.

    I begged Mark to tell her that Dave did it, & he did.

    Dave got the beating.

    I was terrified of my mother until she died, in her eighties, tied to her wheelchair in the nursing home, out of her gourd.

    One of her favorite things to do was to beat the he!! out of all 3 of us;
    she'd start with Dave, yank him up by one arm until his feet barely touched the ground& whack him several times, go on to Mark, snatch him up & whack him a few times, & then turn on me & beat me until her rage was slaked.

    I have a lump on one of my ribs that I can't explain;
    I suspect she broke that rib yanking me up & holding me in mid-air while she beat me.

    I've seen that same sort of deflection of rage several times, once with a woman who alawys got her husband all riled up at somebody else when she sensed that he was building up a head of steam, & once with a man who goaded his wife into being enraged at somebody, anybody, else.

    I finally understood why he was always talking ugly about somebody or other when the wife's mother (in her eighties, had just had heart surgery) had to call the police to get
    away from this woman.

    People will do terrible things to keep from getting another beating.

    What is on that video is not "spanking";
    the full-grown man hauls his arm back all the way & beats that girl;
    when she tries to get away, he grabs her & does it again.
    When she makes it to the bed, he turns away & then turns back & hauls his arm back all the way again & hits her on the arm & the side.

    That, dear friends, is called beating the he!! out of somebody.

    "Part of what perpetuates abuse is justification of it."

    Amen to this, too.

    It's always the victim's fault;
    one of the classic lies is "she kept aggravating me until I finally couldn't stand it anymore" which is similar to another classic "I don't know why she's like that."

    This guy criticizing & *blaming* his daughter for posting the video is the same;
    he's on the internet beating the daylights out of her, yet he doesn't try to defend his behavior;
    he blames her for posting the video!

    As far as beating being the norm in times past, *that does not make it okay*.

    It used to be English common law that a husband could beat his wife all he wanted to as long as he didn't use a stick any bigger in circumference than his thumb.

    In some countries, it's still legal to kill your wife or daughter if she "shames" you by, say, getting raped & thus no longer being "pure".
    Does the fact that it's legal & that it has precedent (that's the way it always has been done) make it right?

    Victims are often afraid to leave their abusers;
    these rage-a-holics & violence junkies tear their victims down so that the victims don't think they can possibly make it without this incredibly strong person.
    They think that the only way they can get by is to try not to enrage their tormentor.

    which of course doesn't work, because the abuser dishes out beatings beatings when he/she has built up a head of steam & *wants* to beat somebody.

    It's horrible & it's inexcuseable.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    fake or not what if this scum*dad saw it?

    South Bend man accused in beating death of 10 year-old son

    SOUTH BEND, Ind. (AP) � A 35-year-old South Bend man is charged with murder in the beating death of his 10-year-old son.

    Police say Terry Sturgis used a wooden club to beat his son, Tramelle. According to a probable cause affidavit, police were called to the home early Friday and found Tramelle unresponsive with no signs of life. Police say the boy had a broken arm and leg and numerous bruises.

    The boy's 14-year-old brother told police their father had beaten them for hours during the night, using duct tape to restrain them. Police say the older boy is being treated at a hospital.

    Police say Sturgis initially denied beating the boys, but later admitted to using a club and a belt to hit them. He was being held at the St. Joseph County Jail.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    That brought tears to my eyes Sylvia.

    Thanks Bee but like Nanny said, my parents were not monsters it's just what they knew. That is how they punished us.

    I will say again that I do not and will not ever understand how you can purposely hurt the people you are supposed to love the most no matter what they did. I also will never understand how a Mother could deflect the anger away from her and on to her child. I don't care who you are, you would have to kill me before you ever touched my kid.

  • 14 years ago
    last modified: 11 years ago

    I cannot believe anyone can think its ok to hit a child at all.Adults get arrested for hitting other adults but its ok to hit a kid!!! Come on,,do people have such a pea brain that they cant think of any way to discipline a child,so they HIT THEM?? Parents who hit their kids do so out of frustration or anger and its wrong.Say what you will to me ,I dont care,God did not give us children to beat or abuse.

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