Charliedawg! Alright, some fun stuff! I agree with your first thoughts that it needs a little something. I think corbels would be a good addition. I also really like pendent lights, they won't block your view. Our's don't. I agree that raised panel in that spot is likely a waste. I also agree that the kitchen won't really come to "life" until you add all your personal stuff. Here's a shot of our kitchen which includes corbels and pendents. Just like our properties, our kitchens are similar. Glad things are back on track. You can't stop writing after you move in. We want to hear all about life in the house. Here is a link that might be useful:

From the photos and what you've described I don't think the overhang should be a big issue. It would be extending out three inches into the family room, about the size of the palm of your hand (w/o fingers even). You would probably want a foot or two of clearance for chairs/stools or 2.5-3 feet for walking between the bar and any furniture anyway, you could probably eat into that for laying out furniture without too much difficulty. As far as the look of it goes, it is a very slight difference well away from your doorway so it should be difficult for someone to notice. You might want to go over with some cardboard and position a fake bar along the edge so you can see how it would look. If you decide to go with the overhang and then don't like the intrusion you could probably obscure the protrusion further by putting tall potted plants (or something else tall) near the door edges to make their position fuzzier and have them look even with the bar.

I'm thinking you should post the question over at the kitchens forum, if you haven't already. I'm sure you'll get lots of opinions and pics! If you don't need to hide anything you'd rather not be looking at from your family room, I'd go with counter height. It will make the counter seem much more spacious than what you would get with a smaller, bar-height "shelf". Have you done an image search for kitchen pass-thru?

Have you tried the chairs with the arms under the table? In my experience, chairs with arms are a pain at so many tables as they bang into the table and don't allow you to scoot up well. The chair you pictured is very attractive though, and the arms look low, so maybe it's not a problem. Just thought I'd mention it.