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I don't know why I can't love my stepson

13 years ago

I am 25 years old. My husband is 33. We have been married for 3 years been together for 6. Me and my husband have our 5 month old and a 2 year old. My stepson is 8. I have known him since he was 2. It's been a rocky road as far as being a step parent. My husband was fooling around with the mother of his other child for years on top of everything to start off. I stayed with my husband because I believe in love and 2nd chances. Might sound stupid but I did. Well my stepson who I have tried to treat as one of my own for years. He is nasty to my 2 year old he said that he hates him. wants to throw a rock at his head. Is mean won't touch him, look at him. He will purposely do something to my 2 year old to make him mad. Than he will cry to my husband about it and try to get him in trouble. I feel awful I have tried to encourage my stepson to love and be nice to his little brother. He will just not listen. It's also not just the ignoring him and getting him in trouble. He also will punch him, push him whatever he can do. But when my husband turns the corner he will try to be nice.!!!! and put an act on for my husband. I feel so bad for my 2 year old son. He will try to hug him do anything to get his attention. HE will just be so cold and nasty to him. Gets me so mad. I mean its not like a little bit he just doesnt like him. It's BAD!!! you know almost abnormal. My stepson favors my sister in laws son. They are about the same age. So I know its kind of personal when it comes to my son. I just feel so guilty because I have such harsh feelings for my stepson. I am a loving person this is not like me. My stepson is so spoiled and disrespectful. A lot of times my husbands ignores it because he has Disney Land Syndrom from not seeing him everyday.We get him every weekend, sometimes I have so much stress that he is coming over because I know it will be a hate fest for my kids. My husband just is so blind to it or he just doesn't want to hear it. I don't know what to do anymore this is why am reaching out for advice to anyone in my shoes. Am so sick and tired of having to fight with my husband about my stepson. You know my husband favors my stepson over my children I feel. It's like my stepson cant do anything wrong. Even the way my husband will look or talk to my stepson is so different from our children. I feel jealous am turning red in the face. I know it's stupid but I do.Family members see it also. I realize that It was my choice to start this realationship knowing he had another kid from a previous affair. I think I was just young and in love at the time. But when things get old. You see what you were blind to in the begging. I would never have the heart or soul to tell my husband it's me and our kids or my stepson. I would never but I feel like our marriage is going to end because of my stepson. I feel put in a corner my husband doesn't want to hear it yet I don't think he knows how my stepson is causing this household to me miserable every weekend.I have to add that my stepson puts a line threw the family. It's like instead of being all together he seperates me and the kids from my husband. I have tried so hard to get him to love me and my children. I know he doesn't love us at all. Well sorry so long please help me I really love the advice. thank you

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