Took out my b-b gun and put my post out of its misery.

I'm a builder: In June of 2009 we received shipment of interior MDF doors from Holzkraft. The doors arrived pre-primed from the manufacturer. Being a LEED project, zero VOC latex paints were used. The painter lightly sanded the pre-primed doors, used a tack cloth to remove any loose paint and applied a Benjamin Moore paint, Eco Spec. product directly to the door. The paint did not stick to the door and could be easily be removed with a light scratch. We called the paint store who lined up an on-site meeting with the Eco Spec. representative who confirmed the techniques being used by the painter were part of the correct process for his product. He suggested we use a primer to go over the manufacturers primer. The painter then primed all the doors before applying the final coat. The finish paint adhered to the new primer. Two years later the homeowner has noticed several areas were the paint has been removed with the least amount of effort. The confusing part of the equation is the painter used the same process on the MDF baseboards and casing through out the house and the home owner is seeing no signs of problems. I am in the process of hiring a surface engineer. I will post the results in a few weeks.

Here's the thing in my situation ... BM knows the children are with me certain hours of the day its not a hidden fact. So when BM is calling to change times etc. She is calling hubby who she knows is at work because she is calling his work cell phone. So then he has to call me for me to adjust my schedule to "accomodate" her needs. So yes if she is supposed to be here at 3 to pick the kids up ... hubby is still at work I am the one home with them ... I have said it over and over for 2 years.... do not include me in the time change if you're not going to be here then the time needs to reflect when you are going to be home so you can make the exchange. It is finally that way after 2 years. Unless of course BM needs to change the times again. Like if she can't pick them up afterschool for whatever reason. So yes it would make sense for her to directly call me to shift my schedule. But in her thinking "he is the one inconveniencing me" well if you call him at work for everytime you "need" him to adjust the schedule around your wants or be there for the children when you should be then who are you really inconveniencing? besides the children of course? I have even said to her after she was rambling on and on how unaccomodating he is ... that if he got out of work everytime she called to change times he wouldn't have a job he would have to be a SAHD to accomodate you and that her CS would be outrageous. Yes parents should be flexible but when its only one parent doing the flexing that is unfair. I kept repeating to hubby when she would call to change this or that ... when she asks you something ask yourself would she do it for you? then ask her while she is asking you do to for her ask her to do something for you .... exchange answers then if not be firm and say no .... he finally grew a back bone after her saying numerous times "WHY should I do you any favors??" his answers got easier for him as the time went on. He realized she wouldn't do anything that wasn't court ordered..... Asked her for a year to take the kids on a one weekend night one time ... didn't matter when and she could not accomodate ... her answer "take me to court" ok so he goes to court the judge orders every friday and saturday ... 3 months in ... she asks ... do you think he would take the kids on a saturday night???? I'd like to have one saturday night off to go out with friends....I said I know what his answers will be... what do you mean?? well he asked you for a year and your answers were .... "why should I do you any favors? and take me to court" so I could bet money those will be his responses to you for atleast a year. But you are certainly free to ask him. And as far as my SM vision works ... if it had snowed 4 inches at IMA's and her hubby was supposed to pick up his DD come hell or high water if hubby wasn't there getting her BM would have flipped out so don't bother using the snow excuse some people just want everything their way or no way. And are only willing to accomodate themselves and no one else. In Ima's situation BM (SM vision again) is supposed to pick the child up afterschool on a friday but calls most weeks to change the time to 6 pm or later because she doesn't want to drive alone the 2 hours to get her daughter so she waits for the BF to get home from work then makes the 2 hour trek. So pick up daughter at 6 after dinner of course. Then drives 2 hours back home if she stops along the way to visit her other child then its an even longer trip .... who is inconvienced there I would say it was the child 4 hours every weekend in a car. Wow that sounds like a lot of fun. Its common courtesy to be where you are supposed to be when you are supposed to be. Say you took a second job on a friday night knowing your child(ren) were going to NCP's every weekend right from school. But then NCP starts calling well I can't get there til 6 pm do you quit your job? or do you tell NCP too bad I have to be somewhere figure out a way? Or NCP is supposed to take the children to dinner on Wed nights... from 5 to 8 ok great so you decide to take a pottery class or whatever .... "knowing" you have adjusted your schedule around your children. Then NCP starts cancelling. Now you have already paid for the class in full no refunds. Do you tell NCP ok this one time but I am taking a pottery class or do you drop what you are doing to accomodate NCP?

umm let's see... SS is 8 yrs old DD is 8 months old... So, first of all an 8 year old should not be wearing pull ups of any kind. He is WAY to old for that. The only exception to this would be a child who is deveolpmentally or physically disabled in some way. (I am uncertain who is Bipolar son or BM) To me, that is the first sign of trouble. 2nd; an only child for 8 years, who obviously is having problems ie pull ups at 8, bipolar or bipolar mom whichever... is not used to a new baby nor has he really been prepped for a new baby. And any baby, in the eyes of someone who has never been around babies especially a child, cries a lot. So, I wouldnt necessarilly (sp) be worried about this... I would more say something like What do you think you did when you were a baby? I did the same thing when I was a baby we all did, it's a part of life... And, spraying perfume and other stuff getting into things is part and parcel of being a child. This is nothing out of the ordinary. 3rd: yes DH should be taking care of things especially when he is the only one home... it is not only lazy but unsanitary to leave dirty pull ups and sheets laying around all day Yes, there is a difference b/w being a BM and a SM but it doesnt mean that the children should be treated any differently. And no, I wouldnt nec. be worried about daughters safety... at least according to what you wrote. But, on the other hand, I feel like there is a GREAT DEAL of info. left out.