Oldest step daughter HATES me!

destini81

My husband and I have been married for 1 year. We are expecting a baby in March. I have 5 kids from a previous relationship and he has three. His oldest is a 24 year old daughter. She absolutley hates me! She has since day 1. She threw a fit because I am 12 years younger than him and my youngest child was 2 at the time. Now that I am expecting a baby she says that all three of them with have nothing to do with the baby. That is not infact the case. The other two kids son 20 and daughter 16 are fine with it. She is evil. She unfriended me on facebook and is ignoring her father since she found out other than to spout off once about no one wanting the baby, that I am too young for him, etc. This chick lives two hours away from us and has her own child! She said she will never explain to her som why his aunt or uncle is younger than him so she will never let them see eachother. My husband has even said she has been his #1 since she was born. Which in my opinion is wrong in the first place because he has two other children. She does weird things like making sure he "has" to talk on the ohne to his ex when I am around. When ever we are at a function and his ex wife is there she has to get a picture with her whole family meaning my husband and her mother but does not find it important that her boyfriend..the father of her child is in the picture! I am going crazy because of this girl. I would expect it from a child but NOT an adult!!! I need some advice!

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Comments (5)
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mkroopy

How about you just ignore her and devote your time to the rest of your brood? With 5 kids and one on the way, how do you even have time to worry about her little hissy fits?

Sorry just never understood the need to have so many kids...planet is crowded enough.

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amyfiddler

Were you seeing him before his divorce ended?

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sylviatexas1

what mkroopy said.

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willpower654

The above posts are kind of insensitive and not very helpful to destini181...I really think that people come on here and post when we are very upset and have no one else we can talk to or get unbias opinions from and I think people should be a bit more understanding of the position posters are in...I know myself I have been scared to post and have received some comments which are a bit rude and not understanding... I am new here as well but I do A LOT of reading from posts even from years ago...

Mkroopy's advice is good to just ignore the behavior... If your husband's daughter doesn't like you... which she is making very clear, she may not be over the divorce of her mother and father... And obviously does not have any respect for her father's decison to marry you... Either way, shes 24 so she will continue to have this view about you most likely.. and when she is ready.. (ie if you two last a long time) she has to come around. If her father chooses you as his partner regardless of age, previous children etc she has to respect that or basically not be around him... You should kind of try to put yourself in her shoes a little bit, I think it would make you understand her anger and maybe you wouldnt be so upset about it. She is immature clearly and is possibly doing things to upset you purposely or she is just an insensitive person and doesnt care about other people's feelings. Either way, you have your own immediate family in the house with your children, one on the way etc so really, don't sweat it. If you read other posts... it is for sure a good idea to make sure that any really rude or unacceptable behavior towards you is intervened by your husband.. It seems like an on going problem for blended families on here that the step mothers are always fighting their husbands to stand up for them. So I would say make sure to nip that in the butt ASAP! If we let them slide we have really horrible problems later on.

She may even be looking for the negative attention.. and by you freaking out or getting emotional she is getting a reaction. Just ignore it all as mkroopy says. If she doesn't want her child around you or the grandfather than who cares. I mean really let her win and say what she wants... just keep your life, direction and the immediate people in your life your focus. These daughters these days are out of control....

Just a side note* my dad is with a woman who is his 3rd woman after my mother. Every single one of the woman he chose I have always shown respect to. Even at a young age. Regardless of my personal opinions of them, the current gf he has now I don't really like the things she does, or the way she acts sometimes and my dad and I talk quite often. He will be upset or hurt and vent to me. But I never let that take over. Everyone is human. If dad likes her and she treats him well to the best of her abilities I'm cool with that. Even if I didn't like her at all and couldnt stand the sight of her.. I would never put my dad in a position like that... He's a big boy he can handle his own decisions and if he needs moral support I am there....

I really think it is the way these kids are being brought up these days with ZERO respect for elders...

Goodluck and I hope it all works out...
Try not to stress too much with the pregnancy and all! :)

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emma

If you were still married you are lucky she just hates you. My sister ruined a marriage and it resulted on her step son killing himself with a shotgun.

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