So at long last I have an update. I did try on quite a few- and ended up with 3 finalists. I anguish over most decisions, this one included. The original one, I tried on again and didn't love it as much and also realized that while I could wear a strapless bra if I were perhaps a guest, as mother of the bride who wants to dance and go crazy, that was not an option. I spent m time at the stores, and also ordered quite a few (at the end, I was ordering dresses in 2 sizes because you never know. ( I don't know how the picture will show up but I got this dress in navy and I love it. It is understated but has some bling, is long but not sweeping the floor, very flattering on and-------has a short sleeve bolero jacket for coverage but looks good without It as well. I actually took it to a tailor today to tweak it. It covers me fine, but she will raise the straps a tad and also ensure that the bra straps are totally covered. I am very excited and cannot wait to wear it. and----it's comfy!!! Now for shoes. I know I want strappy, and am looking for super comfy but of course pretty. I think a wedge could work since it is a garden wedding......... but yay I have a dress!! Here is a link that might be useful: prettiness

I was mother of the groom three years ago (you can search this board and find a picture of my dress, but truthfully that won't be any help -- ) and now am mother of the bride. And I am built very similarly to you - an inch shorter, even. I can give you this advice: SHOP IN A STORE, not on line. Unless you are very easy to fit -- i.e., tall and thin, which let's face it we aren't! -- it's very hard to find a flattering dress, especially a long gown. Even when they look good on us, they don't look at all like they do on the pictures of the 5'10" size 4 models; it's like a different dress. Even my future son-in-law's young, gorgeous sisters didn't like the first set of dresses they ordered on line that looked so perfect in the pictures once they actually got them, so they are starting over. If you really don't live in or aren't visiting a city where you can try on, then I guess you have no choice but to order a bunch of returnable dresses on line and hope that one looks good and send back the rest. But I would still start by visiting local stores just to see which cuts look good on you. I had zero luck at bridal shops. The clerks told me that it wasn't my imagination: the mother-of-the dresses are mostly designed for tall women. Of course they will make yours in your size, but all the details are out of proportion. I also think that the styles are usually kinda unoriginal and matronly compared to the dresses you can find in shops or department stores. (For both weddings, all the grandmothers, all in their 80s, found their dresses in bridal shops.) They just don't look like anything you'd buy another time, let alone that you'd see on the red carpet. Plus, they take forever to come in, they aren't cheap, and they aren't returnable if they don't look like you had hoped. So unless the bride insists on a matching fabric or something (which she shouldn't, but if she does, humor her!), I'd skip the bridal shops. You can look at lots of pictures of other moms, but it's not really going to help. You need to find what looks good on YOU. If you live near a store with a free personal shopper service, USE IT. You don't even have to buy anything. I found my dresses out of town but used the Nordstrom free personal shopper for help finding accessories and undergarments. What a huge help that was, and believe it or not it ended up SAVING me some money and definitely a lot of time. And it was fun! So, tell us: what kind of dress do you need? Day, night, long, short, dressy, not so dressy? What time of day and time of year is the wedding? What is the venue? Do you think you will have future occasions to wear this dress again? Do you have any particular jewelry or accessories that make you feel wonderful and/or have sentimental meaning that you'd like to wear for the wedding that could give you a starting point? What is your all-time favorite dress you've ever had? Do you know what the bride's mother is wearing? Try to match that in terms of formality and probably length. Does the bride want you in a specific color scheme? If not, great -- choose what looks best on you when you try on, although I suppose avoid things that will clash like mad in the photos (it's NOT the time for black, green, and orange day-glo polka dots!). Keep an open mind when you shop. I was glad I tried on styles and colors I didn't think would look good on me; I got some surprises in both directions. Happy hunting, and congratulations on your son's marriage.

Connie.. you could go with the last one, and add a really fancy, or embellished bolero/shrug/fine knit cropped sweater. If you cant find a fancy one, you can get a plain one and embellish it. All of the ones shown are very pretty. I did a little search, but no fall colors right now. Maybe in a month or two. the link below shows a really fine spun/woven knit. then here are a couple... things too http://chicforless.net/product/1/41/Embellished-Cropped-Cardigan.html http://www1.bloomingdales.com/catalog/product/index.ognc?ID=80677&CategoryID=2910&PartnerID=SHP&cm_mmc=PMD-_-NexTag-_-Product_Terms-_-Sutton_Studio_Exclusive_Shrug_Misses' Here is a link that might be useful: cute georgette dress... But the shrug is what I was looking at. you could really add something special to the neck and front borders on this

Oh, good. You said "shower," not "party," so I assumed you meant gifts. A "shower" is a party where you shower the guest of honor with gifts. People are starting to use the term more broadly, but be sure not to call this party (if you give one) a "shower," because there will surely be some if not most who think you are telling them to bring a gift. A party with games still seems over the top to me for a MOB. It's fun to do things like talk about grandmother names and becoming a mother-in-law, but making an organized game out of it would be too shower-like. I'd be embarrassed if I were her, and frankly I'd be a bit embarrassed for her if I were a guest. Just go out for a nice lunch, brunch, or dinner together with her and maybe just a couple other very close friends and toast the family's good fortune and the new couple's happiness. As I wrote above, the things a MOB/G's friends typically do for her is to give a shower or party for the bride/couple, not for the mom, or offer to help in some other way with the wedding. I.e., you help her in her role as host, not try to make her a guest of honor. I know you mean it well, but I'm afraid that the effect would be kind of pathetic, as if she needed bride-like attention.