Michelle, it sounds like exactly something a kid would think of. At least he had a suggestion for his Nana's present. Brennan is one little guy i'd love to get to know. Aren't kids great?

Mary, thanks for your wonderful memories; they are especially precious b/c your Mother told them to you. My Mother has been gone since 1990 and there's rarely a day that I don't think of her. She had some great stories, too. Her Father was a lighthouse keeper's assistant, and until she was 11 years old, she lived on a small island off the FL Coast. She and her sister and brother got to school--on the 'mainland'-- every day, in a small boat. B/c it was the way they got 'to and fro', it didn't seem unusual to them, but it sure fascinated me! Good memories are wonderful, aren't they?

Erica and Josh, my thoughts and prayers are with you! I am a bit older than the two of you but have a similar story. i am in my mid-30s and the oldest of 8 children. Both of our parents passed away in 2008. Our dad was diagnosed with advanced colon cancer and passed away after a very hard 3 1/2 month battle. Six months later, our mom was diagnosed with advanced breast cancer and passed away a month and a half later. It was a devastating time for all of us and most especially, our youngest brother who was still in high school. Our grandmother had lived with our parents for a bit and fell ill in 2007 and passed away that spring - this was during my brother's sophomore year of high school. During his junior year, our dad got sick and passed away. This was an incredibly hard time for my brother because he's the only boy in the family so if our mom wasn't home to help our dad go to the bathroom at his bedside and my husband wasn't there, our dad would get my brother to help him. There were times when our dad would try to get up in the middle of the night and because he was so weak, he would fall on the floor and then our mom would need my brother and sister to help her pick him up and get him back into bed. It was devastating to see our parents deteriorate so quickly and especially hard on our brother to have to take on so many difficult adult responsibilities at such a young age. Our mom was diagnosed with breast cancer at the end of the summer just before our brother started his senior year and then passed away a month a 2 weeks later. So our brother dealt with 3 major losses throughout his last 3 years of high school. As soon as my mom passed away, i immediately went to the court to get official custody of my brother. My mom and I had talked about me and my husband taking on a guardianship role. Because my brother was 17 at the time and would turn 18 a month and a half later, we got court appointed custody rather than full guardianship. Guardianship would have taken several months to put in place and go before a Judge and at that point, my brother would have been 18 which would make guardianship more difficult. With custody, it is me and my husband vs. my parents but because my parents are deceased, they cannot argue any of the guidelines of the custody agreement. We needed to have some form of official documentation stating our custodial responsibilities in order to get my brother under our health insurance and thankfully, this worked. Erica, it is wonderful that your father set up a trust to help you with school! I wish I could say the same about our parents. Unfortunately, they were not at all prepared for what might happen if they passed away. There were no Wills, no education trusts, nothing to help out with any of the costs to help raise the younger siblings who needed help and guidance, both financial and otherwise. One of my sisters and I are administering the estates (my grandmother, mom, and dad's estates) and our lawyers made it very clear that no estate money could be used to help with education because even though my brother was 17 at the time of their passing, our parents had every right and opportunity to designate money to be left to help with education costs. It was incredibly frustrating and left me in tears many times as I tried to work step by step to figure out how we were going to manage everything financially. Both my husband and I were still paying back our own student loans and I had been laid off from my job shortly after returning back to work after my mom's funeral. I think that changing the dynamics of switching roles from sibling to a parental role can be quite a challenge in many ways. It can also make you feel very isolated from others, even from your family and other siblings sometimes because there can always be those who question how much control you should have, among many other things. Most of my friends have babies or small children so it was hard to find someone I could relate to who could at least understand what it's like to have a child in high school who would soon embark on all of the excitement of senior year - senior trip, prom, graduation. I can remember heading to the bookstore shortly after my mom passed away, pouring through the shelves, looking for any books that would help explain how to handle the transition from sibling to parent... how to raise your teenage brother. There was nothing. The best I could do was buy a book about raising teenage boys and even that wasn't much help because my brother wasn't just an average teenager but one who had been through an enormous amount of trauma and loss. I found that working through the school was a good place to start. His guidance counselor recommended an excellent therapist that some of the other parents had also recommended. This therapist has been wonderful and I am so glad that I thought to ask for resources rather than just trying to wing it on my own. My brother has gone through issues with depression, substance abuse, and thoughts of harming himself. Just recently, he reached a very low point and we were able to find a wonderful treatment program for him and he's already sounding like his once happy, comfortable self. I am so thankful that this program has been so helpful to him and has been teaching him the coping skills he needs to help him get through the rough times which tend to fall around holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries of their passings. The 2nd anniversary of our mom's passing was earlier this week in fact. In spite of the difficulties, my brother graduated from high school and went on to start college, then realized after his first semester at that school that he wanted to transfer to a school where he could follow his passion. He is an incredibly talented musician and wanted to study recording arts. Once he was settled in a new school, learning and studying in a subject matter that he loves, he really began to excel. There have been bumps in the road as he and the rest of us try to pull together as a family and create our "new normal" but there have also been wonderful milestones accomplished and experienced too. In spite of everything we've lost, we are still very blessed! My thoughts and prayers are with you both Erica and Josh. I am so glad that you found one another! I too come online to try to find other people who have experienced a similar situation because it always feels good to find others who you can relate with. Take care and may God Bless you and your families!!

I agree as well... and unfortunately I cant completely say my kids arent as well...my DH is terribly guilty of wanting to just buy stuff to buy stuff because they want it... because "I never had those things growing up and I dont want to be a d*** like my dad was" We have went round and round about this ... Most recently it was wanting to buy the boys an xbox (the boys who already have a playstation2, and playstation) I was like not on gods green earth are we putting another gaming system for those boys in their room... if you really want to get something like that wait until christmas and make it a family gift .... I think he is finally getting tired of the boys attitude now... their we want we should have it if they are told no they throw a fit attitude .. I think has pushed his last button... Just last week he told me I am not getting anymore things for these kids until they can start acting like they appreciate what they already have... I just looked at him and said really?!, that sounds like a good idea. And I really cant stand when, for instance, last night the oldest got a medal for football and when he showed the younger one ... the younger one just got upset and was like why didnt I get one... I jumped on that quickly. I can understand being bummed you didnt get one but dont do it at the expense of taking all of the "glory" so to speak away from the one who did get an award. I told him last night not to act like that ... be happy for his brother and maybe he still will get a medal (his team hasnt even done medals yet) I hate the always fair if you have it I should have ... if I want it I should have it... And, I dont think its fair to teach our kids that attitude by giving in...after all, of all us grown ups know ... that life just does not work like that... I think that is a big reason why we have so many problems with my generation of adults and with our kids. We have been so busy trying to not hurt self esteems and trying not to get into trouble my some busy body ... that we have let kids take control far before they should and therefore raised kids that have no sense of authority, hard work, and respect for those around.