You know my answer. However, talking to an agent yesterday, we agreed that buyers can be a "handfull" in todays market. Their demands and expectations can be quite unrealistic.

When we moved to a new city a couple years ago, we called an agent that my boss recommended and told him our wants and price range, which turned out to be unrealistic. It was realistic for the city we had just moved from, but the new town was having a real boom. Instead of just telling us this, he took us to several real dumps that were in our stated price range. It wasted our time and made us get a new agent (who turned out to be even worse but that's another story). He should have just been upfront with us, but he probably thought we wouldn't believe him and wanted us to see for ourselves.

Well being educated about markets etc. I would say your answers were probably right, but somebody calling and not being familiar probably thought you didn't want to work with them. Eventually they may learn they are unrealistic and I think for this type of buyer you will likely have to meet with and show what is available before they are willing to adjust anything or see comps and competition on their house before agreeing on a listing price. I think this will be especially true for people that don't move very often.

You are a woman speaking to a strong headed man, kind of like myself & hubby lol

What I would have done would be to set up an appointment with him, then try to find something up to $325k maybe $350. I would pick a few different layouts, with basements & garages if possible. You can show him the difference between a 3 bedroom with a basement, or even a 4 bedroom with finished & non finished basements, this will give him some vision to what he can actually afford in his price range and how it will be after he does a little work.

He's going to have to adjust his thinking and either you will help him or someone else will.

If he does not find something right now, who knows what will be there when he actually lists.

As you know, we are upgrading our house. Our "kids" are 31 (w/ 5 yr old daughter) 23 & 15. We do not have enough room if everyone wants to stay over. We also want the computer area, craft area and after seeing some finished basements have our vision of what we can do. We should have done this years ago.

Gee, what kind of a realtor are you?
Doncha know that he wants to look at the 350-500k homes with all the extras & lowball into the 290's? LMAO

There is no such thing as unrealistic sellers or buyers, just bad agents, who cannot accomodate their WANTS.

Ok, enough of sarcasm.

You know, there are bad agents out there (Won't go there. They spoil it for the rest...) & there are good ones who get railroaded by unrealistic buyers/sellers.

I have a good eye for staging (but I'm not in the business) & can can you instantly why a house is not selling. What cracks me up is when a poster comes out to the board (not nec. this board, but RE boards)complaining that the realtor is not doing a their job... Then someone asks them to post pictures of their house....
I'm like Wha...? People live like that? They have no clue that if they just spend a couple of hundred dollars to get it staged it would sell quickly. But they don't get it.

Oh, I'm sure your caller wants "a deal" but will expect TOP DOLLAR for his house-lol

Sheesh -people.I don't know how you could keep your tongue in check.

Well I guess I'll be honest - as a buyer I would have thought you didn't want to work very hard.

Everything you said to the man was negative and sort of demeaning - you didn't throw him even one positive bone. You didn't offer him any solutions, you just busted all of his dreams and plans and expected him to immediately give up everything he wanted without complaint. This is his retirement - giving up space for his hobbies and/or having to spend money and time updating a home must be very difficult to accept.

I think he called you in order to get the ball rolling - I did the same, called agents before my home was ready to sell. I think you came across as not wanting to work because you didn't offer to meet him in person to discuss his plans for selling his home or his desires in his new home, you didn't offer any creative solutions to his 'problem' (basement, garage, shed, smaller bedrooms, maybe the home he's selling is worth more than he thinks & he can spend more on the next one, something!).

I would have wanted you to say something like, "Your future retirement plans sound great! I think it might be a bit difficult to find exactly what you want in that price range, but I'm more than happy to work with you on finding the best possible home for you. How about we schedule a meeting at your home so we can discuss this further? I'll show you what's available in your price range and we can discuss this further."

I've been having a heck of a time with agents (my husband has already moved to his new job, I'm finishing up the final decluttering and painting of our home - we are ready to list!). First agent shows up with no contract for us to peruse and not a word about what he can do for us (no self promotion) and doesn't call us back. After several days I call him and he says "I thought you wanted to wait awhile." Huh? I thought it was clear we wanted everything settled before dh left. 2nd agent shows up, again no contract & no self-promotion, gives us his best guest on our home value and says he'll check comps and get back with us. That was more than a week ago and I haven't heard from him since. 1st agent finally did drop off a contract, but it's also been more than a week since then and we haven't heard from him.

The market here is good - homes are selling and the prices keep going up. But there isn't a lot on the market so I don't understand this reluctance to actually work and make some money ??

didn't offer him a bone?

You were brilliantly tactful & diplomatic.

You just didn't say what he wanted to hear.

If you'd said what he wanted to hear & had shown him houses that he could afford & tried to get him to see reality, he'd have done exactly what summerskye did; he'd have dumped you & gotten someone else.

If there's a way to get a purchase/sale to happen when the principals aren't ready to be realistic, I don't know what it is.

He's either being unrealistic or planning to make lowball offers on anything he sees.

My guess would be the second one. I'd tell him to call me back when:

a) he is ready to look at houses that ARE within his price range or are fixers.
b) his own house is ready to put on the market.

Gas isn't getting any cheaper. I wouldn't want to waste my time running someone around who will only aggravate sellers with ridiculously low offers right out of the gate.

If he really wants to see homes outside of his price range, I'd charge him for gas. Or perhaps you could send him email alerts when something of this description does come on the market.

If he considers this unreasonable then you probably wouldn't want to work with him anyway.

I had many agents tell me I coudn't get what I was looking for in my particular area. That goodness that I didn't listen to them - they were wrong. Sure, what I was looking for was fairly rare for the area, but it was possible. Now I am living on my dream property and thank goodness I didn't settle for something different per the advice of some agents.

It wasn't my intention to come across as tactless or undiplomatic. "Offering a bone" is just a saying that means giving someone hope after delivering bad news.

I agree that the OP probably didn't say what he wanted to hear. OP also didn't say anything to soften the blows She delivered, nor was he given time to digest the OP's opinions.

A potential client possibly dumping an agent because the agent tries to get the client to see reality but he can't or won't is a reason not to try? Not even worth an hour or two to meet the client and discuss and educate him about his options? What about when he is ready? A little time put in now is not worth a potential contract in the future? Maybe so, I'm not an agent, just a buyer, so I wouldn't really know.

I didn't read anything in the OP's post that said the man was unrealistic after she spoke to him, only that OP's opinion was that "the call ended abruptly as I felt he really didnt want to hear what I was saying". If the OP is correct then I can't really blame him - what a person desires in retirement is a pretty big deal and if you find out you can't get what you've dreamed of then it's going to take some time to mourn the loss and come to grips with it.

If he really wants to move, he may go to open houses to see for himself. Or he will call another agent or two. If the OP is correct, he will soon realize that he is unrealistic. But I too might not hesitate to believe the first agent I called. Some don't want to work with buyers.

I like to work with buyers, not shoppers. I have lost $10's of thousands working with shoppers and not buyers, (when you've been in the business as long as I have, it adds up), but that is part of working in real estate, and why it's so important to differentiate the two if you want to make a living.

I would have sent him a dozen listings along with some recent 'sold' prices -- or steered him to some online. They would speak for themselves. You could send listings that have what he wants and listings that are in his price range.

I would have told him there's currently nothing on the market with what he wants for what he wants to pay, but that I'd keep an eye out for anything new.

I agree that the OP probably didn't say what he wanted to hear. OP also didn't say anything to soften the blows She delivered, nor was he given time to digest the OP's opinions.

I've "known" Linda for about a year and while she is honest, I don't see her as coming off as rude. It was probably the other way around, the person got ticked when he thought she was implying he couldn't afford the area.

We did not hear the phone conversation so we have no clue how honest she was. I know how she is when she posts here and IMO she gives good advice.

Linda came here making a post asking a question, she's trying to get feedback from buyers, because she is trying to figure out the best way to deal with this customer.

So my question is, would you rather hear as a buyer that your "wants" are unrealistic for your price range or do you just assume the agent doesnt want to put the work into "finding" that house and its out there somewhere?

I've been thinking more about this and reread what I wrote. When I said I would show houses up to $325k - $350, I would also show things he actually can afford. You have to get a feel for the person, unless you already know him. He may end up being like us and willing to drive a little farther to get more house for his dollar.

I would also want to walk his house to see what he has to work with because who knows if he is realistic on that price?

Thanks everyone for your responses. I didnt include ALL of the info so I will give a little more now since it has come up several times. The first thing being, the man is not in my area, he is about 2 hours away so I could not go to his house or discuss his home with him. I did offer to refer a realtor to him to get his house listed. He said he had a realtor already but was "decluttering" and wouldnt be ready for awhile.

I work my entire county so going further wouldnt help him. He would have to go outside my county which he does not want to do because thats "too far" from any city.

I did set him up on an automated email system and told him that homes fitting his criteria would be emailed to him as they came on the market. (I dont expect much). I also sent him a search of what was currently on the market that "almost" fit his criteria. (had 4 bdrms, 2 baths, but needed some updating). You simply cannot get what he wants in my county for his price. Showing homes $50,000 out of his price range is not something I do, even in a buyers market. To me its a waste of time, sets unrealistic expectations of what that buyer can get, and most of the time they fall in love with something that they can't have.

Chisue, as far as "listings speaking for themselves". Unfortunately, experience with this type of buyer tells me that if I show him the 4 bdrm/2ba home in his price range it won't be in good condition and, he will say I am just showing him "crap", if I try to show him something in his price range that is smaller but in good condition, then I am not showing him what he wants.

This was fun to see. I'm going to try to come up with a few other situations that I've come across, I love to see the responses depending on whether the person answering is "buyer, seller or agent".

I guess you could send him all listings in his price range and say "this is ALL that is available right now in your price range. I know the majority doesn't meet your criteria, but at least it should give you an idea what can be found in this area."

With him being further away it may be that he just needs to figure out what he can get for his money. I know we had sticker shock when first looking in our area. Rural and at least 1hr away from a larger city, however prices were about the same as homes selling in Austin, TX or right outside, which is one of the more expensive cities in TX.

I agree with lyfia. In this day and age of internet shopping for houses, it is easy to demonstrate what's available at a certain price point.

Your "cut to the chase" approach probably isn't conducive to bringing along a retiree who isn't in a rush. You are probably a great realtor for busy professionals, but not for this type of client.

My answer to your question is that I would not downsize my expectations based solely on a phone conversation with an agent.

I'm curious whether he said "I want to spend about $300" or "I can afford to spend up to about $300." If it was the former, and you merely assumed the latter (because most often they're synonymous) then I could understand why he might have been offended.

As a buyer, in that situation I would have preferred to hear "The type of house you're describing in that area in move-in condition generally runs from $350 to $375. If you're willing to do some updating, you might be able to find one of that size for $325. For $300, the available houses would probably be this size and that age."

That way, if he was willing to move on one aspect - size, location, price, condition - he'd still have the opportunity to say so. If he wasn't willing to budge, you'd know not to waste your time with him.

I think setting him up with automatic notification of appropriate homes was a good first step.

This situation reminds of when I was searching for my first home 16 years ago. I wanted to spend $100,000 for a non-townhouse home, in an affluent area. One realtor literally laughed nastily in my face. I'll never forget looking at his ugly yellow teeth as he bared them at me to laugh. Needless to say, I worked with someone else, and quickly found a great $120,000 fixer-upper. The agent I worked with patiently showed me $100,000 homes first (there were only 3 or 4 of them) which helped educate me about what I needed to spend.

I'm not implying that you laughed, OP. Your response sounds reasonable.

It does get discouraging for buyers sometimes, though. Seems like there's a lot of negativity out there.

Don't people check the MLS online? If he did, he would have already known what his dream home was selling for.

I think even the most savvy homebuyer can be unrealistic in their wants and needs compared to what price will buy them.

There's a show from HGTV Canada that is now showing in the US called Property Virgins. In the show, the realtor starts with asking the first time buyers their wishlist. They all want the sun, moon and stars, but their budget doesn't fit. She shows them a variety of homes in their price range and helps them go through the pros and cons, but to also think realistically about what they can mark off the list in order to find a home.

Anyway, when I was looking here in MN, I had a price range in my mind. No matter all the searching I did on the MLS, when I saw houses in our price range, they were either in a not so nice neighbourhood, backed onto a busy road or were on a busy front street. When we upped our range a bit, we got more what we wanted.

However, I didn't know the ins and outs of the market here until I saw it for myself. Maybe in this guy's area, he can get what he wants in the price range he listed. Maybe he's not net savvy and doesn't look at the MLS online.

Linda, I think you did fine. I would want to know if I'm being unrealistic and I would appreciate your honesty. Although, I would still like to see a couple houses for myself to make the decision because I might be willing to pay more to get what I want when I see that my original price range is not realistic.

clg7067 asks....Don't people check the MLS online? If he did, he would have already known what his dream home was selling for.

In my opinion, the answer is "no", not EVERYONE checks the MLS on line. Linda's original post mentioned that the fellow was retired. I think it's quite possible that he didn't scope out houses on line...remember, computers for everyday use have only been around for about the last 15 or so years. There are some of us out there who actually remember life before them.

Count me in with the group that has heard "you can't find what you're looking for in your price range" from a real estate agent, but found what I was looking for in my price range anyway. When I last moved from a city about 3 hours away to my current city, I called several agents. Most were willing to help, but one said that I couldn't find what I wanted in my price range. Guess who I hired? Not him.

That said, I don't think it's bad for an agent to turn down business that he/she thinks is a waste of time. There are plenty of businesses that just can't accomodate a client, or have just decided that a particular type of client does not suit that business' business model.

Although, I would still like to see a couple houses for myself to make the decision because I might be willing to pay more to get what I want when I see that my original price range is not realistic.

Which was why I said I would show over $300k. If the guy is not qualified over $300k, I would see if there is something empty that he can look at as well as check open houses. He very well may increase his budget if he sees he has to.

I don't consider it a waste of time and some houses I've watched out of our price range are now in our range 9 months later. Yes, some are still on the market.

As a soon-to-be buyer, I would want some plain talk about what is and isn't realistic in my price range. Say it nicely, but say it. I have some friends who moved from a rural, low-price part of one state to near where I live-- a more urban/suburban area of my state. Their idea of what they ought to get for the money was seriously not in line with the market here. They couldn't help but contrast how much they paid for their rural house with what they were being asked to pay for less-nice houses here, and it was hard for them to accept that the market is what it is. They had me go along with them on a number of house-hunting expeditions, and I don't think their agent tried to set appropriate expectations. He just took them to places in their price range and let them struggle with convincing themselves of the realities. It took them a long time and a LOT of houses and a lot of very grumpy talk between them about the failings of each and every house they saw.

If it were me, I would rather have an agent who at least tried to give me a realistic picture of what was and wasn't possible in the new area. To me, one of the main benefits of using an agent is targeting, and part of hitting the target means being pointed in the right direction in the first place. If I'm not facing the right way, I need the agent to say, "hello, that's not a target for you." It would save me time and aggravation.

Rose: I don't consider it a waste of time and some houses I've watched out of our price range are now in our range 9 months later. Yes, some are still on the market.

This is exactly what happened when we found this house. It was out of our price range on my house hunting trip to the TCs in Nov. I remember seeing it online and being bummed it was out of our range and it went under contract quickly. Then, when I started looking after arriving and when I walked in, I remembered it from the MLS and it had been reduced to our range after the first contract fell through.