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The Kitchen Table

Could use a few thoughts today

14 years ago

We're about to head out to Rachel's apt. to get her belongings. It's about a 2 1/2 hour drive. I know this is gonna be HARD!!!! You all don't have to post em, just keep us in your thoughts and prayers today, ok???

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Comments (20)

dotmom
14 years ago
Oh, how sad. If at all possible, try to put a happy memory of your Dear Rachel's on her things. My heart goes out to you and all of the people who loved her. Dottie
nola_anne
14 years ago
I will be praying that through the tears will also be some heartfelt humor...you'll find some there in her things somewhere (and a few questions, too, probably!) That's what people are made of...love, laughter, tears, personal stuff that only they know its significance.

She was a beautiful person...her things will reflect that!

Safe trip, too!

nola anne
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I could really use your thoughts.
Q
Comments (10)
Thank you all so much for your responses! You guys are great. A few things before I respond individually. Our HOA has ridiculous rules about landscaping. Every house must have two trees out front: a pine and an oak. So unfortunately, removing them is not an option. Trimming them helped a ton and you can now at least see the house. Sunnyca, I know what you mean about creeping fig. I just love it so much. *sob* And the houses around here that have it are freaking adorable. I know how much work they are (as does DH) and I even tried to talk him out of it yesterday because I know it can be damaging to the mortar. KarinL, I know exactly what you're talking about re: outer space. It's something I hate about this house too. Worse yet, it's closer to the street than my neighbors so it looks even more awkward. (In case any of you are wondering why we bought such a house; we moved here for DH's job and chose this suburb for (a) the school [we have four kids] and (b) the commute. This house was probably the 70th we looked at and the layout inside is perfect for us which was more important to me than the exterior.) Catkim, the Sago was removed because we simply don't like them. I know that's somewhat of a sin in the landscaping world! The windowbox with the yellow flowers was one I googled. I'm not going to be using yellow in the box. Possibly geraniums with maybe varigated vinca vine. We can definitely grow lavendar and salvia here. Nandina, that's an exceptional idea. I'm pretty sure they'd allow it. Another poster suggested that when we replace the lantern to have it hang lower to that space between the door and the window. Thoughts? Inkognito, we're definitely painting the motifs above the windows. They're so "hey look at me!!" the color that they are. We actually might mix some water with paint and use it as a stain. laag, we were hoping to build a pergola/arbor/trellis (whatever they're called) in front of the garage with something like clematis or mandevilla growing from either side. My only concern about whether I want to pretend the garage isn't there or just celebrate it, kwim? Not "celebrate it" but just incorporate it since it's obviously there and there to stay. Also, I'm pretty sure once we paint, it's going to inpsire my neighbor to do the same. Her landscaping is fantastic and her taste inside her home is nice. You've all given us plenty to think about and I'm anxious for DH to read this thread. Thanks again!
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OT - could use some prayers and positive thoughts
Q
Comments (22)
Thank you everyone - had a family Christmas party last night at my nieces house and my 7 year old granddaughter was there. I held her so close and was so thankful to God that I could. She was so full of life and so excited about new dance moves she was learning and a new song she is learning. I just 'drank' it all in. So many many parents and grandparents will never see their 6 or 7 years old ever do that. There are times when I say 'why God??' but in the end I know he has his plan and one day it will all be made clear. Again my prayers are directed to Connecticut - may they feel God's comfort during this time of sorrow ..... Lynne
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My Mom is very sick-Could use good thoughts
Q
Comments (23)
Will say a prayer for your mom and your family. It's amazing what people will fight over. The ex's siblings fought over stupid things that their father left behind, he lived in a very old, run down dirty trailer and had basically nothing but old junk. They still managed to fight and demand things that belonged to him and his new wife. I hope your family doesn't go that route, especially since your mom isn't even gone yet. Geez. (((Nan and mom)))
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Exterior brick what do? I really could use some thoughts..
Q
Comments (10)
We have had 2 brick homes with structural problems. 1905 and 1919. Our current home has a flat roof addition. So, yes, an open area 12 ft above the ground. I live old homes. I would consult a structural engineer - not a mason yet, not a contractor. We learned our options from him. Knowledge is power. My advice today is pretty much what it was when you posted before. Your balconies and lower porches are part of the same structure...one that looks like it is sloping downhill on the left, just like 2012's picture. And, yes, I know what structural work costs. But in my experience, it's the best alternative. Here is a link that might be useful: Snagd's 2012 post This post was edited by jmc01 on Thu, Jul 17, 14 at 20:00
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Marilyn Sue McClintock
14 years ago
Have a safe trip and you will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Sue
lydia1959
14 years ago
Good thoughts going your way (((Janie))).
juellie1962
14 years ago
As I wait for new life to enter the world (granddaughter) I can't imagine what you're going through at the end of a precious life. Jamie, I haven't stopped thinking of you; hope you have a safe trip!
susie53_gw
14 years ago
My prayers will be with you today.

Susie
kacram
14 years ago
((((((((((((((((((((Jamie and family))))))))))))))))))))))
okwriter
14 years ago
Jamie,

My SIL lost her 20-something son in a motorcycle accident last fall. She took his dogs right away, of course, but I remember when she had to go and gather the rest of his belongings from the house.

So very hard... I will be thinking of you today and praying for strength.

Rita
country_bumpkin_al
14 years ago
My thoughts & Prayers have been with you since the beginning of this and they will be with you today!
irishdancersgram
14 years ago
Will certainly be thinking about you and sending special thoughts.....

My sister lost her youngest son 3 years ago tomorrow and it took her awhile to go through his things...He lived at home, was 38, had MS and passed suddenly with a heart attack....I asked her for his favorite tee shirts and just yesterday, I gave her a quilt made with all the shirts....

If you or someone sews, have some of her shirts made into a quilt...My sister sat and touched each of the squares and it was just like she was touching her "baby" once again.....
jaybird
14 years ago
((((Jamie and family))))
linda_in_iowa
14 years ago
You will be in my thoughts today as you go through this. Many years ago, a friend died of breast cancer and her brother and I cleaned out her apartment. It was a difficult thing to do but I got some of her cookbooks and things to keep as mementos of her life.
matti5
14 years ago
My thoughts and prayers are with you today. Big hugs!
angela_nor_calif
14 years ago
Thinking of you. :(
patti43
14 years ago
(((Jamie)) This will be a hard day and I'll keep you in my prayers along with the rest of the KT. Try to remember that when things get too hard--today or any other day!
loggerbaby123
14 years ago
wow, tough day, but know youre in my thoughts and prayers, its never easy losing a loved one. many hugs to you and your family.
joyfulguy
14 years ago
Hi Jamie,

I hope that, through the tears, you found some new, pleasant things about her, and some happy things, memorable ones that you can store away in your memory.

I liked what Nola Anne said - I hope that you found some things such as she referred to, today.

Maxy you find peace in your heart, through the days ahead.

One of the good memories is of the kind things that others have said about her influence on them, through her few short years.

ole joyful
hallngarden
14 years ago
Jamie, thinking of you today. That was a good idea that irishdancer mentioned. When my father died, I took his shirts and made two quilts. Made one for my brother and one for myself. Will always cherish the memories of the times I saw him wearing those shirts. Hope you were able to find something today that brought a smile to your face in memory of Rachel.
nancywi
14 years ago
((((Jamie & family))))
gentle hugs
des_arc_ya_ya
14 years ago
((Jamie and family)) Hope today went smoother for you than you were expecting. I continue to keep you and your family in my prayers.

If possible, you might want to just bring things home in boxes and then gradually go through them over the course of several weeks. Perhaps start with less personal things of her's, such as books, computers, etc.

As I went through them I'd pick out a few special things to keep for you and your family. A lot of the other things, household stuff, etc. try and think about how much good someone else could get from these things. From what you've said, Rachel was a very giving person. I'm sure she'd love the fact that she is still helping others.

My thoughts are with you. What a horrible task that no parent should have to do!

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