intro and my clutter story

19 years ago

Hi: My name is Jade. On Christmas day it will be 6 months we've been in this house, and I have been overwhelmed for the whole time! This is a large 4 bedroom house that we bought in rather rough condition, and far from clean to say the least. We lived out of bins for the first long long while (still are to a point) because I wouldn't use any kitchen and bathroom cupboards or closets in the house until they were cleaned and painted. I have been reading a lot of the posts here, and think this is my 2nd post, and am so pleased at the fast response, especially being so close to Christmas.

As far as Christmas goes I had originally planned to have Christmas day here, having no idea that my house would not be ready on time. Christmas will be at my mom's as usual, and as far as Christmas decorations in my house go, all I'm doing is unpacking out of boxes, purging what I don't need, and storing the rest in plastic bins. I have all my wrapping supplies in 1 large flat bin and will try to finish Christmas shopping today!

I joined the flylady site, and my sink is soaking in bleach as I type. I have been getting a LOT more done, with help from the posts here and the flylady, and because I can't stand living out of control and in such a cluttered unfinished house any longer!

I also watch all the declutter shows on t.v. and it all seems so easy until I start to purge. I purge, but never enough. I am getting better though, I'm really in the mood, and in no mood for Christmas because all I want to do is paint and clean!

My goal is to have a totally clutter free house with a place for everything. I don't know how long this will take, but the flylady site seems like it will surly help me, especially because I've always been big into making lists. I have started some of her methods on my own before even knowing about her site, but stopped, not knowing that I was really onto something, just another idea I had that didn't seem to work in the end, but only because I gave up!

Sorry for such a long post, but my clutter is ruining my life, I never feel like I have free time, always some kind of cleaning I should be doing, yet nothing ever gets done!

I tend to do a little in this room, a little in that, then back to this room, then upstairs to another. I don't get any immediate gratification this way, but can't help it, it's just the way I work.

Any hints or suggestions or words of encouragement would be appreciated!

thanks!

Jade

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Comments (7)

cupofkindness
19 years ago
Just remember that the results of feeling overwhelmed also look like the results of failure. Don't confuse the problems with the symptoms. You are not a failure. The key is to get rid of far, far more than you think you should. I no longer even save stuff for charity. They are stuffed to the gills too, and in Dallas, one place will only accept baby clothes since they are choking on tons of used clothing. I throw away clothing b/c in the end if we have used it (we have 7 children), then it really is worn out. There are better options for the poor than clothing from my home! (remember Maria's dress in The Sound of Music? The poor didn't want it so it wound up at the convent!) Ditto for mugs, sports bottles, magazines, etc. Just throw them away and soothe your conscience with the promise to buy less worthless stuff in the future. It gets harder. How many TVs do you need? (donate the extras). Sets of dishes? Rolls of wrapping paper. Black shoes. Our lives our too short to muck through useless stuff. I promise you, you won't miss a thing and you'll learn not to buy as much stuff in the future! When you feel the urge to shop and spend money, buy gifts. Merry Christmas!

~Cupofkindness
rjvt
19 years ago
The first step for me is always to get mad! If I am not, usually I will put off doing anything or not really know where to start. But then I get SO MAD at picking the same (fill in the blank) for the thousandth time. That is when I finally see it for what it really is - junk. I have gotten so mad at not being able to find anything in the storage room. That is when I finally went through and got rid of a ton of stuff in there (including my grandma's old lamp that made me think of her, but I knew I would never use). I still have a ways to go, but I pretty much know what's in there now, and how to find what I need. Use the energy you have now (It won't last forever). Think of it as a Christmas present to yourself! You need a place to live (rather than store stuff), and there will be other Christmases (next year, in fact :) )

The only other comment is to really focus on one room (sounds like your kitchen could use it, but that could be too much for right now, so any room) and get it usable. This will give you some inspiration for the rest of the house.

Good luck!
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Sylvia
19 years ago
Don't make lists. Just set a timer and get to it. Tell yourself "fifteen minutes on this pile" or whatever, and get after it. I love the timer method of staying focused on task, it makes a big difference to me.

I'm a big believer in the trash can as well. If it's a big item, and you think it's too good to throw away, put it out at the curb with a big sign on it "FREE!" and see how long it takes to disappear. I have gotten rid of a lot of stuff that way.
mitchdesj
19 years ago
I just love the way you girls think; it's inspiring !!

"You are what you surround yourself with"

is a motto I read somewhere and I tell myself often.

When I get up with an urge to declutter, I walk around the house with a garbage bag and don't stop till it's full.....
Purple_Jade
Original Author
19 years ago
Thanks for all your help. Yesterday was very productive, and I did shine my sink before bed, but DH rinsed his cereal bowl out this morning before I got up, but didn't rinse the sink so when I got up there was dried crap in the sink, how annoying! I have to train him yet I guess.
Next I will start getting dressed to the shoes in the mornings, but I have to wash my indoor shoes! This will help me though I think, because I do tend to NOT get dressed until I HAVE to, which can sometimes be rather late in the day, and I hate when people come to the door, I won't answer it unless I am dressed.
apoem
19 years ago
Ha! Good Luck training your dh. IF you get it done, let us know how. I would love to have a trained DH.

I almost have to have lists. I can't function without lists. I also can't do 15 minutes. I sit down and make big lists. Long term continually running to do lists that get updated as we finish things or find new things to do. The items on this list include painting the study, cleaning the shed- the things that won't make a huge impact in daily living or that are really somewhat big project. I als have Short term daily lists that include errands to run today etc. Goals lists- organized house, etc. The daily lists make sure I have enough time to get the bigger projects completed. The goals make me realize why I have either list at all in the first place.

I also have to just get started and get some uninterrupted chunk of time and organize.

TO me organizing is more that purging stuff. You can purge and purge and still have a very messy house. My friend is an example of that. Being organized means more to me that that- have a neat house, have a place for everything and everyone knows where the place is for everything, and so on.

So sometimes I just run around and find a place for everything laying around. Sometimes I clean and call that good. Sometimes organizing is spring cleaning out a closet or a cupboard. Sometimes it is taking a garbage bag and purging everything.

What I can suggest is that you aim to have one room done by a set time. I think organizing is catching to some degree. Maybe our husbands don't catch it- but really, once you have one room done you can move on to the next and really, I"m more encouraged once I'm done with one room.

GOod Luck. G
Purple_Jade
Original Author
19 years ago
G: I just might be able to train him to help keep the kitchen sink shiny, because this morning I told him keeping that sink shiny is the reason he's getting his lunches made and packed for him more lately, and the reason I've been getting up earlier and making him a hot breakfast before he goes to work. :) ........... he seemed to get it, we'll see.
I'm on holidays right now, till Jan. 3 so I'm keeping strange hours. Last night I stayed up till 7:00 a.m. trying to finish more in the kitchen and do some painting and other cleaning up. I slept till after 11, but when I got up it was actually SHOCKING to walk into my kitchen and see it so clean it sparkled.
I always have lists too, and am starting to work on the flylady journal, which I think will work well for me, since I have always functioned well with them. Flylady is giving me more ideas of how to organize my lists though :)>
I know the flylady says go slow, but I've been in this house for almost 6 months, and I finally got MAD and decided I've had enough of living like this, it's time to settle in.
I'm having fun though, and enjoying the results. I will keep working with the kitchen, there's painting and a wall to repair in there next, and the cupboards aren't all totally organized the way I'd like. I agree with what you say about organizing and purging etc. It takes time and lots of thought to organize things perfectly, but as long as I do a little more each day sooner or later things should be great, especially with the help from this forum!
Organizing IS catching, I am anxious to do more now, but with so many unfinished rooms there's only so much I can do right now. But now I do have a fully functioning kitchen with all the important things in a place and is a very pleasant room to come into in the morning now!
Anyway, I am very excited to have found this forum and the flylady, and really happy that my house is noticably better by the day now. I was getting in a rut, and was so overwhelmed it was killing me. Now I'm all motivated and am excited to start the new year with my life under control. There is still much work to be done, but I can enjoy doing it now that there is control and order and support from people like you along the way :)
THANKS TO EVERYONE AND
MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

intro and my clutter story

Comments (7)

cupofkindness

rjvt

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intro and my clutter story

Comments (7)

cupofkindness

rjvt

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