janegael, I'm glad Gloria found a home with you. You could always give her a seed ball to plant! Ingrid, imagine a dog marked just like your Nellie with long hair. That's my Felco. The vet believes he is a pit bull/bird dog mix. He has the pit bull conformation and personality and the bird dog fur. We mostly keep him clipped, as his skin does not support all that fur well. He's sold me on pit bulls as a breed. I will get another when that day comes. Wendy, Max is beyond beautiful. Makes me want to go out and get one just like him. I could stare at that face for hours. This is my Baxter guarding my plants. DH e-mailed me that this AM. He caught the event just as he was leaving the house.

We had a lovely, summer-like stretch of weather this past week - 70s and 80s, clear and sunny. It has been VERY dry, though, so I did a lot of "spot watering" with a can, and some kelp emulsion fertilizer. I did plant some things out (in the evenings, well watered), and watered them every evening after their daily baking. I also had to water my long shade bed - it wasn't dessicated, but it was definitely thirsty and lagging. I also had to open all my containers and check their moisture level every day; I had to water them several times. Yesterday we finally got some blessed, beautiful rain. It was accompanied by a prolonged rumbling booming slow storm, but I didn't mind that at all. The temp dropped 10-15 degrees in a half hour. You could practically HEAR the whole garden go "AAAaaaah. . ." as it soaked up the rain. Today I can just watch things grow. My DH will have to mow again this weekend, and put in the A/Cs (I enjoy the nice weather, but I have little tolerance for the humid heat in the house). I'm glad I direct sowed my nasturtiums yesterday - the Lord watered them in for me really well, lol. Laurel

Ours makes a buzzing sound during cooking, like some metal is rattling. When we gently nudge it, or press against the doors pretty strongly it stops, but when we let go, the buzzing starts again. It's noisier than we want it to be. But it seems quieter since we removed the bottom door yesterday and then replaced it. So maybe something is loose?

The fact is Ekcs I dont think there is a right answer. My daughters father commited suicide two days before her second birthday. He dropped her off with his mom saying he would be right back and jumped off of a bridge. My daughter is close to her grandmother (her fathers mother) and remembers her father through what others say. And to be perfectly honest there is a part of me that every day I have to bury deep down that is so angry and pissed off that he took the easy way out and yet all anyone ever says about him are good and wonderful things. It makes me mad when my daughter randomly talks about how she wants to go to heaven to see her father or how much she loves him... it makes me mad when I have had a day from h*ll and my daughter has been in rare form and I think I am at my wits end and I realize I cant call her father to 'be the dad'... I am pissed off that this man that people only seem to want to honor his memory couldnt man up to his responsibilities and I am stuck raising a little girl on my own. I am pissed off that he put anything that awful into her perfectly innocent world at such an early age. And dear god, it pisses me off thinking he looked at that little girls smiling face and still in all essence walked away. That said, I love my daughter with all of my heart and never ever ever would I tell her or express any of this to her. I have never lied about him to her ... I have curbed the harsh truth in adjunct to her age... ie she is four she doesnt undrstand suicide but she does understand he chose to not be alive anymore but he loved her with all of his heart when he was here with her. I will never lie to her about him... when she is old enough she will know the full truth, see the newpaper article and the obituary. I understand your exasperation... it doesnt deter your love for your ss... it just shows how much you do love him... after all, I have thought I didnt sign up to be a mom to a daughter whose father killed himself (I understand the irrational thought in this but it doesnt change the desperation or the feeling) Our feelings dont go away and the almost hatred that we feel for that person that would dare cause this kind of pain and hardship because of their own selfish behaviors doesnt change only our reactions to it. Very few people know how I truly feel about this subject because I know that it sounds horrible ... but just as you can say I love my ss and I didnt sign up for this in the same sentence... I can say that this kind of feeling is perfectly normal I have felt it in those moments of pure exasperation towards my own daughter and situation. The only true and honest piece of advice I can give you or myself is to take it one day at a time one moment at a time... and always when you feel that desperate angry sad feeling coming along the path take a deep breath and take a few minutes if you need too... let him honor what he wants to honor... I let my daughter do so... but as I said I make it a point to never lie to her I wont carry her father's sins for him... I am never cruel or harsh but I wont lie or cover up for him either... I know it will be harder down the path and I am desperately afraid she will blame herself in some way... and I know it will be all the more tough ... but in reality the only way to change my situation would be to not have my daugher and that wouldnt even be close to an option in a million years. And, somehow, I think you feel the same.