I think it impossible to sufficiently emphasize that not only is each child different (whether or not considered to be ADHD or autistic) but also each diagnostician differs! And so does each teacher and each school system and each state's educational expectations differ. I see the differences not only because my job involves special education eligibility (Federal, state, and county compliance), and not only because I am familiar with diagnosticians within both school and medical systems, but because my DD was among the first to be officially medically diagnosed as being ADHD. While I would give all due respect to those physicians who feel only medical doctorates are qualified to make a diagnosis, I would be far more impressed with their personal qualifications and experience on the subject, if they have any. In the past twenty years in this job, I have seen literally thousands of MD-signed "diagnoses" which were overwhelmingly obvious in their lack of supportive in-depth knowledge of both patient and disability. I have also seen some truly impressive evaluations which -doctoral opinions to the contrary- were as likely to be written by a clinical psychologist or pediatrical behavioral specialist as by a formal pediatrician or other medical doctor. The problem, of course, is that there is no single cause of the physical/emotional/behavioral spectra which is commonly termed ADD, ADHD, or autism. In each category, the legal definitions themselves are changing, and criteria which is acknowledged by one medical group or state or educational system may not be accepted by another. If one has a pustulent rash, swabs and microscopes and medical histories can determine whether the rash was caused by poison ivy or chicken pox or something else. When one has difficulty learning to focus and/or to behave with social appropriateness and/or to simply sit still -or any of the other several dozen criteria for ADD, ADHD,or autism, one learns that there is no one single defining cause nor is there any one single defining "cure" or amelioration. This fuzziness of both cause and cure can be beyond frustration for parents, teachers, and medical staff involved. Like others, I could talk for hours and days about my personal experiences with DD's ADHD which might or might not be of any help to you. Instead, I'd rather encourage you to do several things, each within your control. First: keep detailed diaries: record meals, drinks, activities and the child's ongoing behavior. NO one can make a diagnosis without supportive information, most especially when general behaviors are concerned. There is more to a child's behavior than is shown while s/he is at the doctor's office. Second (and this is more difficult than diary-type notes), eliminate sugar and foods containing sugar-replacement additives from the diet. The restriction includes sucrose, fructose, aspartame, saccarin, etc. To do this is a PIA, which involves much reading of labels and consistency in refusing to give in to demands and whines. I've been there and done that, and when it comes to compliance: adults are a bigger problem than the kid. (This restriction may or may not affect the behavior, but I guarantee the body will be healthier.) Third: do not accept any single person's diagnosis as being sufficient unto itself. I do recommend having at least one pediatrician [if at all possible one who has studied and reported on ADD/autism] AND a non-affiliated behavioral specialist and/or clinical psychologist make a diagnosis. And if the diagnosis is presented after one visit and consists of saying that little junior is obviously ADD and needs medication, go find another person to make an informed evaluation. The average evaluation takes many hours of one-on-one study by the diagnostician with the patient, and ends up summarized in a 15- to 30-page report. Anything written on just one page is probably an unsupported opinion which may have little to do with your child. Fourth, remember that there is a very large segment of the medical community which believes that no non-medically trained person needs the details or basis of any medical diagnosis. Period. They will be offended and/or appalled that any one else would question their diagnosis or evaluation. IMO, run-don't-walk out that door. There are too many intelligent, informed, and informative medical personnel around to limit yourself to someone who believes you are incapable of understanding basic English. OTOH, you need to show your comprehension of the issues involved. Keep a notebook going with a summary of what you have read [who wrote it/when, by whom, where published]. Be very cautious of medical personnel who discount or shrug off reports from the child's teacher/s -- that is similar to saying that what one person observes over a several hours every day, every week is of no importance. IMO, what a teacher sees over six hours daily has as much importance as what the parent sees over six hours daily --- and in both cases the views may or may not be of value in a diagnosis but neither should they be summarily dismissed. The odds are that either teacher or parent is far more familiar with the child than the doctor is! And last, remember to love the child no matter how exasperating the actions.

Randy - Sorry, I hadn't read this thread for several days so I hadn't seen your question. No, I didn't find any that I would buy. Wal-mart had a few but the only ones that looked healthy the day I was there were patio plants and a couple of Celebrity. Next door they had some also but they were far from healthy looking. I had a few left over from spring planting that had survived the entire summer in a cup. I decided if they wanted to live that badly then I would just help them out. I picked out the best seven plants, sprayed them with Daconil and planted them in the garden. All are growing and look healthy, but I don't know if they will have time to produce. Since they were free and available, I didn't worry about it too much. The plants in town were $3.50 to $5.00. I might have worried a little if I had bought 7 at that price and they froze out without producing. LOL You may have seen some of my other postings where I said that most of my markers washed off this year so except for a few, I had no idea what kind of plants I transplanted. Since I was growing only in containers for spring, I had a lot of transplants left over. I almost always do, but this year I had a lot even after I shared with the neighbors. I put these last seven in the garden down the long side of a cattle panel. They will grow taller than the panel, but that is OK. I don't have nearly enough tomato cages and they are all in use. I have a lot of those cheap big box store kind but they are all on peppers. The last time I planted peppers in my garden, they got so loaded that I had a couple that just fell over and pulled the roots out of the ground. Last year I had them all in containers and started out that way this year. All of those hot days were wilting them down so I moved them all to the garden. They still get a little wilty mid-day but liven up again after the sun goes down. There are several of us from the Grove area that post on this forum. One out by Sailboat and another down toward Zena, I think. Last year there was a frequent poster named Mick that lived in Fairland, but I haven't seen him post this year.

Define 'large infestation' ;-) Do you mean where the buds and the leaves are literally obscured by and dripping with aphids? If so, I've had infestations like that, and Ladybugs took care of the problem without flinching. Generally, folks don't overwinter a great number of plants, and so the problem is usually much more manageable. If Ladybugs are an option in your area, I really feel they are the best option. Just spray off the plants to mechanically remove the excess aphids, and then loose the Ladybugs. In my experience, one Ladybug will clear a medium-sized plant. When I overwintered more plants, I would simply move the Ladybugs from one plant to another. The Ladybug larva are even more adept and voracious at aphid control. When the Ladybugs have done their work, I move them to my Hoyas, which are even greater aphid magnets. Josh

Wait, I am a bit confused. So you didn't think BM was going to take SS to practice, but you did think she would pick him up at the stated normal time, right? And now DH has told her she can pick him up AFTER practice, which I am assuming means YOU will have to drive him to practice, and drive him home and then BM will get him? Just making sure I understand. I totally 100% agree with you that if DH is going to make changes to the schedule--HE needs to be around to deal with them and the potential fallout. It is unfair of him to make the changes, but then expect you to sit around and deal with them. Ditto on the fact that the judge may throw his hands up in the air, too. If DH wants a set schedule and times SO badly, but then constantly disregards it, then it's obvious (to a court) that it's not *that* important to him. Reminds me of a friend of mine--she has two boys with her ex. A six year old and a three year old. Never married to the ex, and the second boy was conceived during a brief reconciliation, and then they broke up not long after. The ex is a shady character---was into drugs/drinking for awhile there, and my friend, who is totally on the straight and narrow, working full-time in addition to majoring in Molecular Biology, didn't like having her boys go over to his place. BUT--she was in a bind all the time, needed him to help with the boys while she worked or was in class, and she would still let him keep the boys. THEN she would complain to her attorney that the boys weren't safe with their dad. Her attorney finally said---LOOK, if you do not think they're safe and you want me to pursue that avenue in this custody battle, then STOP sending your kids over there. You lose credibility when you tell the judge the kids are not safe but send them there anyway! He had a point. This was three years ago, and the dad ended up cleaning up his life and the two of them now share joint custody. Same kinda situation, though. When your DH changes things, he loses credibility. Just want to make sure I am understanding.