I finally took over the laundry or most of it. First thing to consider was the washing machine. Lotsa buttons and options. Being of sound body and weak mind I read the instructions. How crass. Next I read the instructions on the gigantic box of Tide dominating the laundry room these last several years. Even crasser.

Why? Couple reasons. SW was making an all day job of it by washing many small loads generating vast quantities of foam with each load (dipped out 1/2 cup at a time) and using way too much water (drowth concern). That's 3 reasons. One load would be my scivvies, next load hers, then her socks (10 pairs) etc. After alll the things I've done to that woman with zero resistance and total cooperation our undies cannot enter the same wash. Lotsa loads - lotsa water - lotsa foam.

Now the foam. Ongoing for years. We do not have a HE machine nor HE detergent. I deduced she was using too much detergent. Had her down to 1 teaspoonfull per load. Still much foam. She put the soap on top of the load. Book says put it in first. So I put it in first. No foam. But the box scoop shows about 1 cup for a load. Book says follow instructions on box. Box says follow instructions in book. Well! So I put in one cup next load - no foam. Hmmm.

Shout. She was squirting Shout all over everything. Me no use Shout. No foam. Problem solved. I was vaguely aware the Shout refill bottle got empty fairly often but, having a successful marriage, let that sleeping dog lay. (lay? lie? ..let lie that sleeping dog?)

Next I exersized my male perogative and simplified the process wholesale. ONE LOAD! I chose the Big Giant option. Took an hour.

We hang the clothes out to dry, probly 50% of the people in town that do that, so she gets to do that. I, however, remove the stuff from the machine and stack it in the basket and carry it out to the lines. Otherwise she removes some and distributes it in piles around the house in preparation for hanging outside then forgets some of it. Anyway my way gets it hung up by 9:00am. Hers got the last out by 3pm -too late.

Ironing. She loves to iron. Can't manage the steam iron anymore. So she has reverted to sprinkling the ironing. For the younger readers this involves squirting or throwing water on the stuff to be ironed - a pre steam iron tactic. Now dig this. She won't take anyting off the line till it is bone dry. Then sprinkles it till it is saturated, rolls it up to stay wet then saves all the stuff to iron next day. Persuing the illogic of this is fruitless, of course, nevertheless it's amusing to try.

When I get the chance I grab the sheets off the line, fold em up and put em away. That leaves a minimum of ironing but which satisfies her. Somehow she hasn't caught on that the sheets are missing.