I've discarded roses by the dozen with no guilt or shame whatever because they couldn't tolerate my conditions. One rose I will forever feel guilty about, while cursing my stupidity, is Austin's Janet, which I had planted in the wrong place. It's a gorgeous rose and, instead of finding a better spot for it, I tossed it. Actually, I tossed two. I now feel they would have done splendidly in another part of the garden and could kick myself.

I just took a count and have, unbelievably, given away or shovel-pruned around 90 roses. My only positive thought about this is that the money I spent on them went to nurseries that needed my support. In retrospect I do think I was too hasty to discard some of them, and that does produce some guilt, but overall I also know that I wasn't familiar with the unique features of this property, especially the oven-like reflected heat caused by steep hills and huge boulders, not to mention the extensive hardscape, which many roses weren't able to tolerate. I have learned, and now never buy noisettes or hybrid musks, no matter how beautiful. Rugosa hybrids are out too, as are octopus Austins which take up room I don't have, repeating moss roses, modern purple roses for the most part, Autumn Damasks, and certain wimpy tea roses like Enchantress, Rival de Paestum and Duke of York.

In the larger scale of things when I think about global warming, overpopulation, the destruction of the environment and lots of other things I can agonize about, rose guilt tends to drop to the bottom of the list, which is a good thing since gardens and roses should be a source of pleasure.

Ingrid, which are you top roses you love? And where would you have moved Janet too? I was just looking at her this morning.

I have 3 body bag roses I should replace. I will give them another season. But I feel bad about Peace. Mom loves her, she is big and happy, but she is now in a place we need something with out thorns because we added a handrail and blocked off the easy access. I hope to dig her up happy and healthy and move her. But she is full of 1"+ canes and I figure I am more likely to kill her than move her happily.

Ingrid, get rid of CdM. Life is too short and space is too precious to use up your energy and resources on a rose you detest. And don't feel guilty about it! Personally, I don't particularly care for it either, messy looking, nondescript orange, blah rose. Find something else you love and plant it and enjoy it!

I can't think of any bought roses I feel guilty about getting rid. Actually there are about a half dozen out there that really must go and no guilt about it. They're dogs! Snowfire, American Pride, Black Cherry and Intrigue are all one cane wonders that gave me few if any blooms this season. They're taking up some prime real estate where I could plant better ones. Bye bye!

There is one I feel guilty about killing, Dublin Bay. I did a very dumb thing and cut it way down one fall, like down to 6 inches, to try and get it to send up some new basal canes the next spring. That goes against every thing I believe about NOT pruning in the fall! I should have known better. It died over that winter. I miss it!

The only other ones I do feel some guilt over are my seedlings. It's so hard to discard those. I mean, they're my babies! But I have been trying to get better at culling out the ones that are just horrible disease magnets. I keep telling myself I'm making room for the better ones I'm going to grow this winter!

Surely you are joking about Cinco. It has to be the most gorgeous flower I have ever seen. It's breathtaking! It is perfection! It is glorious!

;^)

Pretty, Hoov.

The only roses I feel guilty about are the ones I murder through my own stupidity. When I had my knee surgery, I stewed over how to keep young roses in gallon pots alive for three weeks during severe drought. I ended up putting them in a kiddie pool with instructions to my husband, who only hears 25 percent of what I say due to hearing issues and maleness, to only keep about an inch of water in the bottom.

When I got home, the pool was full to the top and half the roses were drowned. The other half recovered. I still have guilt about all those dead baby roses.

Well yes I don't have the farmer's impersonal view about my plants. I can never stand it when I see the cart full of annuals that need pruning and TLC at Home Depot ready to be thrown away. I could never be a hybridizer and kill off plants just as they are starting out.

I try to give all my plants the best situation I can and I spend too much money watering them because I feel that I'm responsible for their needs. I would rather give them away than to see them suffer. If I have a plant that is healthy but I don't care for, I try to find it a new home. There hasn't been a rose that hasn't found a home yet. I think there is someone out there who would just love your super bloomer. Someone who loves bright color and would love a rose- ANY rose. There are people out there who have no money at all to buy a plant and would love your rose. There is an elderly person who cannot plant a large plant who would love to see that rose blooming from their window. It's work to remove them and haul them across town and replant them for others but it brings so much joy. So many people aren't rose experts. They would love ANY rose that would bloom for them. The reliable bloomers are the easiest roses to find homes for. The roses that are hard to adopt out for me are the huge old roses that don't fit easily in modern yards. But I find people with horses that are willing to take them and plant them along pastures to beautify and old fence. It gives someone pleasure as they pass by and feeds a few bees besides.

There are roses that I bought in ignorance not knowing they were going to hate life in my part of Orange County and there are others that I wished would have not been given virused roots to grow on. I don't blame them but it is frustrating having to buy the same plant all over again because it was virused or the roots don't like my alkaline soil and I should have bought it on Dr. Huey rather than on roots that would hate it here.

I have a neighbor who says he wishes he had all his money back from all the years he spent buying plants and everything that you need to garden. My garden and pets are so very important to me. I cannot imagine a life without them. I do not regret the money I spent to give my pets a few more years when they got very old and had medical needs. I do not regret the year I spent 500 dollars on tulips when I KNEW they were only good for one season. That was a fabulous sight that year and it was completely worth it. Just to do it and have something completely different for a year. Something so unusual for our climate. I just wanted to do it for years and finally did.

The roses are there for me every year and I love the perfume. The rich sweet perfume that changes all the time and causes me to walk over and check out a new bloom just to see what the fragrance that day is. ( BTW, after 3 years of growing a Papa M., I got a huge blossom that smelled pretty good. I took it in and in 2 hours it had the most incredible perfume! Now I know what you all are saying about this rose being up there as one of the best rose scents of all time but it took 3 years to experience it for myself.)

I suppose I could have just bought seeds and saved money by growing veggies, but I fell in love with roses and camellias and well that was that. I'm trying to be a better, wiser, chooser now days. Some mistakes of the past still make me feel regret (like the expensive true cinnamon trees from Hawaii that I wanted desperately to grow for me and broke my heart when they died) but then we all have those and really what can you do but try and do better next time.

When you find a home for your rose with someone who really wants it and you get another that you have your heart set on for that prime spot, you won't feel bad anymore. Just two people feeling good about their roses.

oh no, say it ain't so! I love my Cinco de Mayo, its been a great performer with nonstop blooms since it planted it in 2011.

I guess the only ones I'm having issues with right now are some of my HTs on Dr. Huey. They shoot up a couple of nice canes, bloom, and then the cane dies back to the bud union. Every time I get up the courage to dig one up (April in Paris, Bellaroma, Yellow Typhoon etc) the darn things shoot out a nice cane again, and I decide to give it another chance. They may finally get the shovel this spring when my bands from Vintage arrive. I have around 20 ordered, and no place to put them!

Tammy

Life and our perceptions are just comical. I look at that perfectly crisp, clear photo Hoovb posted, and I see a bloody wart. Give me high centers or lots of pedals!

I went to HMF and looked at pictures. Well I would be down if I was expecting the promotional picture and got what hoovb posted. Some of the darker colorations are interesting and I guess you have to see what this rose gives you in your climate.

I don't feel guilty, but I am giving away several roses that I have just become bored with in the last few years. They just don't call my name. They are healthy productive plants, but I guess my tastes have changed.

I do have one rose that I am keeping simply because it has been here for about forty years. It's 'Tropicana'. I know I have written about this rose in the past. I just don't like orange toned roses. The plant is healthy and productive and so large it would take a backhoe to dig it out, so it stays.

Smiles,
Lyn

Bah, I am afraid I am plagued with guilt every single day. For sure, there is a torrid mix of Jew and Catholic in my heritage but I can beat myself up over every tiny thing. The little seedlings - THEY ARE ON THEIR ARSE! Those foxgloves I should have pricked out three weeks ago. The sweet peas which are crammed too tightly in too small pots. The lemon, currently looking dreadful, dropping leavesd all over the ghreenhouse. The roses, sadly mildewed and waving about dangerously. The filthy greenhouse glass, the unmoved dog poo, the cracked pots (facing the wall).......and on it goes. I haven't even started on pets, children or partners yet.....and as for cooking, cleaning and shopping.
Mmmm, I know gardening should be about pleasure....and so it is. I am clearly enjoying this masochistic examination of current fails or I would either get on and deal with them or simply ignore them but nope, it's torture time every day, chez campanula.
Blimey, though, I love CdM and want one badly (although settling for Scharlachglut for my red fix). So true, Harmony, I want a perfectly flat, 5 petalled single with a coronet of stamens - you can keep high centres and heaps of petals. 'Shrubbery' is exactly what I want in a rose.

interesting topic...I used to say tennis was cheaper than therapy, then, realized, actually....therapy was, in the long run, cheaper! ok, tmi!

but guilt! from a psychological perspective?? nope. see former paragraph...learned about guilt!

I too fell for the 'press' on Cinco de Mayo, kept it in the ghetto for too long...struggled with giving it away or planting...planted, and have to say, I totally agree! It is looking fairly healthy, but I too have to say....that's not a rose! So one day...SP! I do have a neighbor who gleefully takes my discards (KO, Betty Boop, etc) and she will love it. I pulled up a dozen roses to move this fall, and a few just didn't find a home and are now in the pot ghetto. It may be a slow and dismal fate for them, but really, don't let this stuff bring you down! life is too short. we all 'waste money' somewhere! we try! we learn! we do much good!

ok, can't resist a psychological opportunity to save another in need from self battering! :) :)

Don't feel bad about not liking Cinco de mayo- roses speak & appeal differently to each of us! When I grow a ros� or plant that does not end up on my list of keepers- I give to a friend, neighbor or park. I've collected so many plants, run out of space, and my water bill could be a car payment! Due to those factors, my performance tolerance for roses and certain plants has lessened. I don't feel bad about about plant collecting- I gave up all of my other vices.

I, too, struggle with guilt and pity for roses I've accidentally hurt in some way or shovel pruned despite their being healthy. I have experienced that many times. I cope with it with a few strategies.
First, I try to find homes for them rather than shovel pruning. I've long since run through and exhausted my list of friends and neighbors who might want my cast-offs. Then I turn to Craig's List and list them as FREE.
Second, I'm gradually getting thicker skin about shovel pruning the roses that are heavily disease-prone or just weaklings. I remind myself they started out as nothing more than pruning material we've all disgarded tons of.
Third, the money I've spent on roses after giving away perfectly healthy roses that I just didn't love, I remind myself its just part of the cost of enjoying hobby and that it defintely is appreciated/needed by these rose nurseries.
I still struggle with some twinges of regret: Roses I had mixed feelings about getting rid of. Sometimes they were great roses but too big for my limited space. Occasionally there's a rose that is great in every way--healthy, viorous, blooming machine even good bloom form, that I just don't like the color of. Winsome, St. Patrick, Pierrine all did well for me, but I could never get excited by them.
The worst guilt is from occasional mistakes that resulte in my killing a rose. Oops. Particularly frustrating when its an unusual, hard to replace variety. I killed off New Yorker by over-fertiling the delicate thing repeatedly until it couldn't recover. (Palm slaps forehead)

This is so healing to read. I mean, not that I didn't start thinking in terms of Cinco De Mayo and guilt a little tongue in cheek, because I try not to take myself, my roses or my guilt too seriously, but at the same time, there is something still real about it.

As I thought though, my creative mental juices started flowing and I now have a plan for CdM.

We have a very unusual local nursery. Unusual in that we're a tiny spit of a town, and who'd think we'd have a "real", family run, no-name nursery with at least a selection of about 100 different roses at any given time. Now, paying about $25 a piece for a rose does somewhat kill me, as I'm still a devout Lowes $8 rose person. But to date I've purchased cl. Aloha, Blueberry Hill, Elle, Sugar Moon, Honey Dijon, Bella Roma from them (along with lots of companion plants - they have the BEST selection of succulents. And they are right around the corner from me. They've been in business for as long as I've lived out here, so about 30 years. I have no idea how they stay in business due to their location (both tiny town, and back in the middle of no-where), so I really do like to support them whenever I can. I've brought them other plants that have inconveniently popped up in odd places on my property, and I think I'll gift them this rose to resell.

There - settled. Whew.

My rose guilt is both ridiculous and unnecessary. I have some truly beautiful roses in my garden. My Just Joey is everything a rose should be. It's ideal for my garden environment. After near obsessive care it has developed into a full, lush bush. The fragrance is intoxicating. The blooms are an exquisite shape. Yet...

...the rose in my garden that captures my heart in the five petaled Red Velvet Magic Carpet rose. I love the rich, velvety red petals and bright yellow stamens. I have it in a container that is resting on a large sodden block. The canes stretch through and around a rosemary bush ( also in a container). I love to see the simple blossoms peek playfully through the rosemary.

I also feel guilt because I buy any rose i find on sale for less than 5Euro. I currently have a rose I bought without a tag/label. It only 1' tall and without blooms. I have no space for it but can't wait to discover what it is when it blooms next year.

M

We should have a 'like' button. Campanula, I laughed out loud.

Here's my guilt story...

I SP'd a Double Delight. It had been in for more than a year, hadn't given me anything, dropping leaves, sulking. It was in a great spot on my walkway, and it wasn't earning it's way. Not even the beginning of a bud...nothing. Nada.

So, I SP'd it. And I took a look at it's root system, and it looked all right, so, for no real reason other than I can't throw away a living thing, I stuck it in a 5 gal. tub of water. Left it for 10-15 days, something like that.

Then I noticed a bud. From sitting in a pot of water? Really? A bud?

So I potted it up about 3 weeks ago (give or take).

Now, it has at least 4 MORE buds on it, and lots of new growth, to boot. The one bloom it has given me is a sickly looking thing, pale and light fragrance and just kinda sad looking.

But darn it, the thing bloomed in a tub of water.

So yeah, I feel guilty about SPing a plant that apparently was just getting ready to give me a half-dozen blooms. I mean, it can't be because of the tub of water, right? LOL.

Now, I'm trying the same method with a Midas Touch I SP'd. It's not looking like it will make it, but it's root system is not nearly as developed as the DD was.

Best-
Herding Cats

In my case, I don't know if I feel guilt, regret, or both about SPing a very old, tired 'Fireside' without first taking cuttings and/or checking on its availability. Altho I was an ardent fan, apparently I was its ONLY fan. Who knew 'Fireside' was on the road to extinction?

No roses I feel guilty about--only thanks to my DH, who persuaded me not to shovel prune a Jackson & Perkins "April in Paris" hybrid tea.

The thing certainly deserved the shovel, in my opinion. After planting it in 2009, I had had three years of no nice blooms, it was a thrip magnet, it was fussy about the Texas heat, and I almost killed it with "Miracle Grow," which should be called "Morbidity Pellets" for all the plants that stuff kills.

Then I decided that I had had about enough of the thrips, the dead and dying plants, the chemical fertilizers and poisons I had tried, which never worked anyway.

I did some reading. I learned what my roses actually needed was bonemeal and poultry droppings, not Morbidity Pellets. I also read about the thrip cycle. Imagine that! Thrips spend part of their life cycle on the ground, and you can kill them by regularly flooding the area around your rose bushes! So I threw all the chemicals into the garbage, and began flooding my rose beds once a week.

It did a world of good. Suddenly, April in Paris stopped whimpering and housing thrips by the thousands. Instead it leapt another two feet and produced beautiful, huge, fragrant blooms all through this fall, only stopping a few days ago when temps went into the 20's.

Lesson learned. It's a good thing my husband is more patient--and a lot more merciful--than I am.

Cheers!

I think I'll gift them this rose to resell.

May not be legal, depending on where you are. Depending on location, plant nurseries/garden centers must adhere to laws about not selling plants in garden earth (sterilized potting mix only), some must only be grown from seed, plants must be sprayed with pesticide/fungicide within x number of days of sale, etc, according to what pests (sudden oak death syndrome, fire ants, chili thrips, etc. are prevalent in the area at the time. Goes by county in California, I think, and there are quarantines for certain plants in certain counties--citrus and so on. This is necessary to try to curtail certain pests and diseases from destroying native habitat or commercial crops.

Giving a plant away that you don't like to a private party can be a good way to alleviate guilt, though. Someone out there would probably love to have it.

One thing I love about this forum, I learn new and interesting facts every time I sign on. Thanks Hoovb. I was not thinking in terms of "giving away", as I like to give away things I like, not things I don't. But you are completely right, I'll ask some of my friends, and one may absolutely love it!

And then there is always the situation where you buy a rose that you expect great things from and plant it in the best spot and give it the best care. Years later you decide nothing will make it happy. You feel that you did your best and dig it up after giving it what you thought was plenty of time to settle down and be a great plant. Someone else plants the poor refugee and it goes on to become a wonderful plant in their yard far surpassing anything it did in your garden.