skip to main content

My father passed away

Sylvie van Kampen

2 years ago

last modified: 2 years ago

Hello, sadly my father passed away 2 days ago. I'm still in shock, but me and my family also need need to organise a funeral. We've had contacts with a funeral care taker company to help us with the funeral, I'm not used to someone passing away, so I don't know exactly what I need to think of. Does anyone have any tips about things I really can't forget when organising a funeral for my father?

Sort by:Oldest

Comment (1)

colleenoz
2 years ago
Funeral homes here usually have a list of the things you need to do when a person dies. Does your funeral home have such a thing?

How will you get to the funeral? Will the funeral home provide a car or will you drive yourself? Burial or cremation? If burial, do you have a plot? Will you have a religious service? If so, you will need to contact the relevant church to organise a time and date for the funeral. Do you want to have pictures of your father on display? Did your father have a favourite charity, or did he pass away due to a particular illness or condition? You might want to ask mourners to donate to his favourite charity or to a foundation researching cures for the illness that caused his death instead of sending flowers.

You should probably consider what you will do for a wake. Often after the funeral the mourners gather somewhere for light snacks and drinks, sometimes at one of the family's homes or else in a rented hall (if it is a large funeral) or a restaurant with a private room.

You should make a list of all the people you need to notify about your father's death so they can attend the funeral if they wish to, and another list of the businesses/government agencies you need to notify (and possibly supply a copy of his death certificate to) such as Social Security, his bank, utility companies, cable TV, phone provider etc.

Do you know where his will is and who is the executor? If you are the executor you will need to gather the beneficiaries together to let them know what your father's wishes were.

Don't advertise the time and date of the funeral either in print media or social media as sometimes burglars look for such notices as they then know that his house will be empty and vulnerable then. You might even consider having someone not attending the funeral stay in the house to prevent thefts.

I'm sorry for your loss.
Related Discussions
How to save my potted hydrangea plant
Q
Comments (15)
Is the soil actually moist when you stick a finger in? Sometimes when potting soil gets dry, it actually repels water due to the high peat content and so water runs down the outside of the rootball instead of soaking in. If this is the case (dry soil) then submerge the whole pot in water until it stops giving off bubbles. Then remove and let drain. How cold did it get last night? Hydrangeas are frost sensitive, so if you are in an area with cold weather, it might have gotten too cold. If that is the case, you will just have to keep the soil slightly moist, bring it in at night and put out where it gets morning sun only, and continue this until after danger of frost has passed. Leaves and flowers will either recover or die, and you can remove anything that dies once it is clear it won't recover. If you put it out in full sun and it was (almost certainly) greenhouse grown, it may have gotten too much sun, too suddenly. These are part shade plants, preferably morning sun and afternoon shade when it's hotter, but all plants need an adjustment period going from indoor or greenhouse conditions to outdoors. Start with bright shade and give it a little more sun each day over the next couple of weeks until it has adjusted. For care if it was sunburned, similarly to frost damage, leaves and flowers will either recover or die (depending on severity of damage), and you can remove anything that dies once it is clear it won't recover. Where are you generally (state and nearest large city)? In my area, this type of hydrangea (bigleaf hydrangea, Hydrangea macrophylla) isn't fully hardy so is best grown in pots and overwintered in a building such as a garage that stays around freezing in winter.
...See More
deceased fathers debts
Q
Comments (11)
Thanks for all your advice I know a lot of it was scams he really believed the nigerian scam-i have a lot of fake money orders and checks to show for it-i didn't know any of this was going on-he gave me credit cards to purchase things for him and I don't recall what the card was-which bank-to be honest I really didn't pay it much attention-so i feel that he is the one that opened these accounts but again he would answer ever junk email and pop up on the computer even scanned his drivers license and ss card in and sent it to these people-i don't know it is frustrating that he would do these things but I know that he thought that he would be helping my mother he really believed that these people were legit-he was always sending money western union to somewhere-I have asked the callers to send me the information and as yet no mail most all of the accounts were opened within the last 8 weeks of his life-he died suddenly of a heart attack I don't know what he had been doing I just can't handle this stress any more-i have sent copies of death certificate, will poa and all other information that would prove to them his death-they know that can't come after me as I am not responsible-they threaten to sue the estate-what estate there isn't one-i spoke to an attorney and was advised about the same as you guys-tell them not to call-send letters which i have done-maybe i should just change my phone number then they will have to send me mail-i don't know sorry for the long rant-i just can't describe what i feel, frustration, pity anger and love for my daddy that I know he would never do this in his right mind anyway thanks again and i will let you know how things turn out you guys are too kind
...See More
My dad passed away recently.
Q
Comments (4)
How shocking and tragic to lose your dear father so suddenly. It seems so wrong. I know how hard it is just to type the title of your posting. Both my parents have been gone for several years now, but I think of them often--my mother mostly almost every day. You'll always miss your dad, but the pain and confusion you are experiencing now will lessen gradually. It's good to have family members to support each other. Heartfelt condolences. I'm so sorry for your loss. Susan
...See More
My father passed away last night
Q
Comments (66)
Sending my condolences and sympathy. No matter how long we have our parents, it's soooo hard to lose one. Men like your precious Father are huge in my eyes for passing by example their wonderful traits to thier children, who pass it along to theirs, and it goes on and on. Suzi
...See More

Related Stories

ORGANIZING 10 Ways to Store That New Father’s Day Tie

By Bryan Anthony

Glass cabinets, drawer organizers and curtain rods are among the clever options for showing off your collection

MODERN HOMES Houzz TV: A Son Builds on His Father’s Architectural Legacy

Architect Anthony Belluschi updates and expands a home that Northwest modernism pioneer Pietro Belluschi designed nearly 60 years ago

REMODELING GUIDES 10 Terrific Pass-Throughs Widen Your Kitchen Options

By Charmean Neithart Interiors

Can't get behind a fully closed or open-concept kitchen? Pass-throughs offer a bit of both

HOUZZ CALL How Are You Passing the Time at Home Right Now?

By Mitchell Parker

Share your thoughts about how you are coping with stress and staying grateful during this difficult time

EVENTS Don't Throw Away Another Household Item Before Reading This

By Mitchell Parker

Repair Cafe events around the world enlist savvy volunteers to fix broken lamps, bicycles, electronics, small appliances, clothing and more

FEATURES How Her Father Became Known as ‘Handy Dan’

By Becky Harris

Household projects may not be the forte of Becky Harris’ dad, but his sense of humor keeps the family amused

TRAVEL BY DESIGN The Father of the U.S. National Parks Lived Here

Adventurer John Muir helped preserve the nation’s natural wonders. His California home shows his domestic side

MOVING Making a Home Away From Home

By Laura Gaskill

Feeling like a stranger in a strange land? These tips can help ease the transition after a big move

KITCHEN DESIGN Modern Storage and Sunshine Scare Away the Monster in a Kansas Kitchen

By Mitchell Parker

New windows and all-white cabinetry lighten a kitchen that was once dominated by an oversize range hood and inefficient cabinets

DECORATING GUIDES An Expat’s Guide to Making a Home Away From Home

By Mariana Pickering (Emu Building Science)

How do you stay balanced when each foot is in a different culture? You take a stand where you hang your hat

Sponsored