Decorating or pet problem? I know I need help.
norar_il
last year
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Oakley
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I need Help with an iris problem
Comments (1)Hi: I don't live in your region, but I think your iris will be OK. New iris for me always shed their original foliage and regrow. They go thru a period where they look absolutely horrible then they rebound just when you start to dispair. Check the rhizomes, and if they are firm and secure in the soil that is a good sign. Laetitia...See MoreI know I need help so please don't criticize!!!
Comments (8)Dad has GOT to take a more active stance. Bio-Mom doesn't get to dictate all of the terms just because she has primary custody. The problems you describe are serious, and heading down a nasty, difficult road. If Bio-Mom doesn't change her ways, this child will be one of those 'never grow up, live at home' adults who can't hold down a job or maintain an adult relationship. I know Momma loves her 'baby', but it's going too far, waaay too far. Is there any indication that the child isn't capable of doing for himself? Any signs of a developmental disability? Since he's old enough to be in school, I'd schedule a conference with his teacher. Or rather, I'd make sure your husband does it, then show up there yourself "to be a supportive wife and stepmother." It'll be walking a tightrope, but it's necessary. See what types of difficulties he's having in school, of if he's able to cope there, but just not at home. Whether or not to include Bio-Mom is a tricky issue -- Maybe talk to the teacher first on the phone so you get an idea of whether or not she has the same concerns you do? If she does, let her be the one to take the lead with Bio-Mom on ways to encourage independence and self-reliance. If the teacher isn't concerned, it could be that stepson's behavior is specific to your household -- which would be a whole 'nother can of worms. (If you have the same last name as the child, odds are good the teacher won't even know you're the step-mom until you tell her -- Which of course, you'll do at the 'appropriate' time.) There are ways to encourage a child's independence without saying "You have to do it yourself." Try showing him once, then asking him if he can do the next one. (Make sure it's something small and simple where his chances of success are near 100%.) If he's slow to comply, be 'unavailable' to help for a few minutes -- maybe "as soon as I get back from the bathroom" or "take the clothes out of the dryer" or "stir the pot for dinner." He'll probably rather do it himself than wait. Or tell him how much the 2 year old looks up to him since he's so much bigger, and ask him if he can show the little guy how to do something. (Never mind that it could be the reverse...) Letting him know what to do, then walking away and leaving him to fend for himself can be a very effective strategy. Praising small advances, looking for good behaviors to reward, and admiring 'big boy' things may also encourage the types of behaviors you want to see. Good luck - and hang in there. Above all, try to remember that the little boy's self-crippling behaviors are a result of his mother's actions, not (yet) a character trait....See MoreI know what I need to do, I just can't bring myself to say goodbye.
Comments (37)I'm so sorry. I was in your shoes this time last year. I knew our almost 13 year old German Shorthair Pointer was at the end of his life, and I was thinking I'd wait until after Christmas, but I realized that I needed to do it the right thing for him even though it was hard for me. We put him down on Dec. 17. :( I probably waited a bit too long, and I didn't realize how much stress I'd been under thinking about whether or not it was the right time until he was gone. There was almost a sense of relief. Missing him wasn't as difficult as wondering and worrying about whether or not I was doing the right thing. We all still miss him terribly, though. When the time comes, I highly recommend getting a vet to come to your house. It was so peaceful and less stressful than taking him to the office....See MoreI need help! Dont know how to decorate or pick furniture/paint for LR
Comments (136)So I am going. to read through all of these suggestions afain! MIL is coming back in town so we want to just order something for the dining table so its already done and she doesnt try to talk my husband out of it (he is a pushover, lol) I actually saw some chairs at tuesday morning as a for now fix, do you a fhink the actual table is that bad,? because I guess we are just trying to find the right thing and dont want tocwaste tons of $$. do yall know if paint is expensive? have any of you done it by yourself.? I saw an article about how to save on smaller stuff like rugs and coffee tables I am going to look into! Dining table is a biggie. But I def want to keep the room so that it could match any paint color (like a white maybe, or grey) a coffee table and area rug. so whatever we bring in will work. i am going to re-look into ikea and post some pics too. I actually found a lot on pinterest too!...See Moreratherbesewing
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