I only feel that I know or recognize very few poster names on here so I really don't know if this is referencing something specific. If it is, I am clueless. Happily clueless.

Anyway I agree with Lucille above. Self reflection is always a good thing. It's not always easy to get total clarity, but some awareness is a beautiful thing.

I commend you.

Thank you both.

salonva, there was a trigger but it's intended as a standalone thought, not a response to any particular person or situation.

Thanks for the reminder to Check Self.

A good friend passed away this week. She was the Epitome of Grace. I’m going to try harder to follow in her footsteps.

It's true that our on-line personas are a magnification of our personalities, but only certain aspects of it. Just as we may behave a particular way at a sports event and another at a cocktail party, on line we also comport ourselves in a particular way. And that too is affected by the venue: eg think of hot topics vs here. For example, I'm not as fast on my feet as others, so what the on-line forums allow me to do is sit and think, mull and consider, word and edit and rewrite to come up with an answer....something real life simply doesn't afford. Real life is a lot more, "Darn, I shoulda said!"

While I don't typically cringe at what I've written in the more recent past, if I go back to who I was in my teen or twenties, oh yeah. I do like to think I've grown and changed for the better, but then again, who doesn't? I also like to think that I've had a positive affect on others, but then again, who knows?

What does surprise me sometimes though is some insignificant interaction with a friend or co-worker I've had with someone in the past that, for whatever reason, I recall so vividly, but I'm sure they don't recall at all. Makes me wonder if others remember those sorts of interactions with me of which I have no memory and what they were.

Every so often Facebook posts a Memory of something i posted years ago. My reaction often is to cringe. A. who would possibly care? B. I come off as an idiot trying to be cool or funny. Once in awhile an old thread gets bumped up here and i reread what i wrote a few years ago and generally its okay.

I’ve met irl three of the people who have commented on this thread so far. You sound like yourself here!

Quote: "Some of my cringiest moments are reading things I've written in the past, especially say 10-15 years ago but also more recently."

In 15 years...I'll probably be 6' under....age....will take care of a lot of self loathing. :0) (that's my idea of humor)

Ahhh yes, looking back and remembering. . . . . . ..

I agree with Lucille, 100%.

And it's good to have you back!

Rusty

It's more what I don't say these days, than what I do say. I pretty much stand behind what I say. Maybe I'm naive 😉

food, I've found what you've said on here, the Cooking forum, and Hot Topics more than reasonable. And often kind. At least, that's my view of you. And I know you weren't fishing for compliments. Just seemed like a good time to say it.

I agree with rob333 and I have never found you (FOAS) to be a source of conflict.

I just try to be careful as to what I say so as not to offend, just as in real life. And I do exercise the use of the scroll-on-by option that is open to us all.

What a great title for this thought provoking post. Good job!

It’s like the story of the two travellers.

A traveller met an old man sitting outside the city gates of the town he was coming to live in. ”What are the people here like?” he asked the old man.

”What were they like where you came from?” the old man replied.

”Oh, they were so nice,” answered the traveller. ”Salt of the earth, give you the shirt off their own back, always ready to help when you needed it. I’m really sorry I had to leave to come here.”

”Then I think you’ll find they’re much the same here,” the old man told him.

The next day, another traveller met the old man at the city gates.

”What are the people here like?” he asked the old man.

”What were they like where you came from?” the old man replied.

”Oh, they were just horrible,” answered the traveller. ”Always nasty and trying to rip you off, wouldn’t give you the time of day, and if you needed help, forget it, you were on your own. I’m so glad to see the back of them.”

”Then I think you’ll find they’re much the same here,” the old man told him.

I too will add that I've always found FOAS's posts reasonable, thoughtful, insightful and never mean-spirited. I've always looked forward to them.

Indeed, Annie - and well said OP, FOAS 🙂

I think it denotes wisdom to grow more humble and empathetic with age. We should all be so fortunate.

And I'm often reminded of something I think I heard first from Dan Savage about interactions with others involving repeated conflict and negativity: 'ask yourself what's (or who's) the common denominator here?'

FWIW, I do believe some folks simply lack 'people skills'.