I'm the admin for a Facebook group for my community. People are always offering up food, clothes and odds and ends. I often think "I could use that" but never comment on the posts. Mainly because I have the means to buy them myself and so many in my area don't. I do offer items now and then that I no longer want. And if someone keeps them for themselves, gifts them or sells them in a yard sale, I don't care: they're no longer mine. But I think if I were to take something, I would gift it before selling it to anyone.

First, I think if I were in that position and took advantage of it, I might not be in that position for long.

Second, there are exceptions. If I see something and know that it has value, or know of the ”perfect” destination for it, I might take it and send it on its way.

Third, if it is something that I’ve been looking for, or replaces a broken one, or completes a set, I might. But I would be careful about how often that happens because of (see ”First”).

No. I wouldn't keep them and I certainly wouldn't sell them. If someone is selling something they do not need it and therefore should not take it for free.

I do not think there is anything wrong with accepting things that are offered by someone who needs them, regardless of whether or not they are first to see them. If you need it, and someone offers it, go for it.

I wouldn't take it unless it was some rare item I really wanted or needed and couldn't find to purchase. I can buy most anything I want, although I have way too much stuff. I leave free things for people who need them.

We have a local Buy Nothing page on Facebook. People sometimes offer nice things that have some value. I notice one woman in particular claims many things. I think she resells them. For that reason, i hesitate to offer nice things, just useful odds and ends.

I would not take anything because i dont need anything and i dont want to get involved in redistributing it.

But then perhaps the people reselling those items need the money...? That's how a bunch of folks make their livings now.

As a general rule I don't care to be that kind of unethical - or greedy, but I can imagine something I had been looking for and really needed or wanted might be very tempting. The thing is, at this point in my life, I don't need very much stuff any more. I'm filled up.

And I wouldn't sell something like that either.

TAKE no, buy maybe, resell NEVER. I got a crate of strawberries a few weeks ago from the food shelf in town. It was a late donation, place is closed until Monday. MUCH produce goes to the farm animals around town.

My local "Buy Nothing" fb group is very active. People are constantly posting stuff to give away. Every so often the admins will post a reminder about ways to make gifting more fair to people who can't access fb as frequently as others. For instance, post your item and say that in 3 days time you'll pick a winner at random. Even with that, there are some names that 'take' a lot of stuff -- but I notice they also give a lot of stuff, too, so I wouldn't call them abusers of the system. Oh and one of the basic rules is being honest -- if you want an item in order to resell it (possibly after restoring it, such as furniture), state that up front and it's okay in our community.

link for those interested: https://buynothingproject.org/

I'd probably keep it for myself but, replace it with something of equal value.

If one person keeps taking things before others see them, eventually people may tire of supplying that person. If all they want is to get rid of things, they may not care. Still, eventually there will be complaints.

Take things first? Yeah, sometimes. Take ALL of them? No. Resell them? Never.

No. I have enough stuff that I am trying to wade through.

marilyn_c...I often think you spend the first part of your life acquiring things and the second part of your life getting rid of it. I wish I had a majic wand and could make stuff disappear.

No. I have more things than I even need. I certainly would leave all those items for others who cannot afford necessities.

I recently gave away some items on Next Door. The first response was a person saying 'I'll take it".

I passed over her for someone else who mentioned the item, and who came right over to pick it up. As others above have mentioned, some people take many items and sell them because they need the money, so when all is said and done the item is gone, which is what the giver wanted, and the taker benefits.

But it has been my experience in the last few years that there are a small set of people who claim every item and then spend the day figuring out whether picking it up is worth it to them. I think no shows are the bane of many givers because of the resulting waste of time. Of course, there are always those with valid excuses- illness, or car trouble, I'm not talking about those.

Our local, private FB groups for sale and free are well-moderated. You must set a price, no ”OBO”.. And you must take responders in the order they appear. For freebies, I think you have to mention the item. No-shows are not tolerated, do it too many times and you are out. If you have also posted the item elsewhere, you have to say so. And, since membership is limited to a 3-town area, chances are good you are connected to the other person in some way. Six degrees of separation. So it behooves all of us to follow the rules.

If you don’t like the rules in general or for a particular item, you just use another group. right now my problem is that I have items to sell at my parents’ home, which is outside the boundaries. So I have to post in another group, which I don’t like as well because there are more people taking advantage, offering a different price, etc.

Now I have a dilemma. I ordered three things from Talbots. Two arrived and my credit card was charged. Fine. Then I got an email from Talbots saying they ”had received my return of a bathrobe ”, which was the third item. I never received it and I never returned it. ext, the bathrobe arrives at my house on the same day I got a message saying Talbots had credited my card with the cost of the bathrobe! So, I have the bathrobe and got my money back.

Now it gets more complicated. I dont like the bathrobe and want to actually return it. I can take it back to a store but i dont know how I will explain this to the clerk . I dont want to get my money back a second time. Not sure what to do now. I am thinking of packing it up and sending it to a homeless shelter so I dont have bad juju in the house!

Donate it. The store has already written it off and would only donate it to charity themselves. You did nothing wrong.

Elizabeth, yes yes, that’s what i’m thinking. Someone at the shelter is going to get a darn nice bathrobe!

Seagrass, I "love" stuff. When I had a 2400 sq ft house, it was nice to have a place for all of my things, but now I am living in a 24 x 12 ft space, I have found out really how little I need. I had planned to convert a new barn that we built before Jody died, into a little house. It is 24 x 30....plenty big enough for me. But with the economy and uncertainty of so many things, and how prices have gone up on everything, especially building materials, I have decided not to. So I am living in the office/apartment in my biggest barn. I don't mind it...but no point in having so much packed up. I have no expectations of ever using it again. Most will be listed on eBay and as I go through it, I will give to friends or donate the rest. I plan to stay here until my horses are gone...and then sell the place and donate to rescues that I have helped and followed. I already have 3 people wanting to buy this place, so hopefully when the time comes to sell, I can still find a buyer.

When I say "until horses are gone"... they stay until they die or have to be put down. This place was bought for them....so I will keep it for them.

@ ded - you might want to wait and see if that charge does show back up before getting rid of the robe...

Reminds me of the women I see regularly at The Salvation Army Store and Goodwill Store. They have cartsful of stuff and I see them cruising every aisle cherry-picking the best articles. Clothing of all sizes, decor, linens, sporting goods, etc etc.

Though I’ve never asked, I feel certain they are buying for resale on FB, garage sales, etc. Ticks me off. I don’t need what they’re buying, but I like a good bargain now and then like everyone else. But there are some people that truly NEED the bargain.

^^^that happens all the time here Littlebug. They particularly love good purses etc. Then they're up on Kijiji.

The news did a segment of a woman and showed racks of clothing, purses, etc that she proudly picked up at Value Village, Talize, Goodwill etc and re-sells it. She said it's a good way to make money. All cash of course, no taxes, etc.

Carolb, yes that thought occurred to me.

On several local Buy Nothing FB pages I often see posts from women who are pregnant and need things for babies - the responses are incredibly generous and it makes me feel good to see women helping each other. There are also requests for assisstive/adaptive devices like walkers etc. I off and on need those myself, so we don't give ours away...

The ARC Thrift store has a .99cent sweater sale every year. I went in to shop and a lady went running down the aisle...yelling...STOP! MY SWEATERS ARE IN THERE! As workers hauled off a dresser to someones car. She had apparently shopped the night before the sale started, cherry picked and put the sweaters in the dresser to get the .99cent deal the next day. 😅