Thank you for the very many helpful comments so far. Since we've not gone down this road before, it's great to get an idea of other's experiences and what a reasonable starting point will be. I don't mind the couple of comments about our budget being insufficient: I am trying to determine what does or doesn't fit in that budget. So pushback is good. If too little fits in it, then maybe we need to table the project for a few months or year until we have some additional cash on the table. We have one quote, that is in line with the previous comment. The GC we talked to didn't seem phased by our budget (and we cited a smaller number back then, as we've saved more in the intervening months). However, when he drew up recommendations, the number *did* come in higher. The plumbing, electrical, and ceiling work were estimated at about 2500 each. The estimate for cabinets, counters, modifying the drywall, etc was about 21,500. So, $28,500 was the quote for all the essential stuff. This left me puzzling over the following problem: wait, save, and come back with more than $28,500 (the 10,000 mentioned would probably be ideal), or try to figure out if we could scale the concept back to bring that figure at least somewhat closer to budget. Our next step may be to play with the Ikea planner. Perhaps what I can do from there is check with one of the big boxes or else (this might be smarter) just get cabinet quotes from a vendor, and then pay one of the contractors who works our neighborhood and knows rowhouses to help us evaluate the cost of everything else. That way we'll know what we can aim at and how close we are. Thanks again, this is all very helpful.

Haha I'm glad you asked then! I had to go re-read the original post and I see where you might be creeped out. No, we love a full, busy, noisy house and I'm right there with you on safety. My ears have saved the day manyyyy times because like you said, small noises and even silence can be very telling! Just today I heard my four year old gently squeezing a spray bottle from two rooms away. He was enthusiastically "washing" our front door and by the time I arrived on the scene a whole wall was drenched. :) Here are the current problems we are hoping to address with the new build: Currently there is no place in our home where you can have quiet if you want/need it. Every room has major bleed through noise-wise to every other room. So, if my husband has a headache or I want to catch a nap with a newborn, our bedroom is adjacent to the family room and we can hear normal conversation distinctly from the other side of the wall. If one child is practicing piano I can't read aloud to my other kids or carry on a conversation in the kitchen (the next room over). We are constantly having to say "not now" on piano playing because it's preventing others from face timing grandma or hearing their audiobook, etc In these cases they are often just playing for the pleasure of playing and our home's layout limits that because of the noise impact on others. My oldest likes to do some of her more challenging school subjects in a quiet spot, without little boys coming charging in using kitchen utensils as imaginary light sabers (imagine that!) but currently, the noisy play room makes the whole house noisy so she seeks refuge in a bedroom closet with her book. :) The plan is for the piano room to stand open most of the day but to be closable when needed so the child (or parent) can continue to play even when quiet elsewhere is needed. The plan is for the away room to invite quiet study and contemplation even when little feet are thundering around the loop we designed in our floor plan just for thundering around. :) The hope is that one parent can take a quiet nap or alone time in our bedroom even when the house is full of laughter (or crying depending on the moment). When I posted our sound proofing plan last time I maybe wasn't clear enough that all of the green glue, putty pads, etc were just for specific walls: media room (where kids will be loud and crazy because we are putting monkey bars and a fort and climbing wall in there), the away room (library) and the wall the master bedroom shares with the rest of the upstairs (so one parent can get up with the kids or baby and close the door and let the other one sleep).

CarrellHouse- Thanks for the response! Yeah the bathroom placements are a little unusual, here's why- The idea with the mudroom powder is my attempt to keep muddy/manure/dust boots from tracking through the house just to "go". I actually would prefer my guests not see my mudroom at all, so I plan on the full flex room bath being the guest access bath. I'm going to have the kids "wash up" in the mudroom bath before proceeding into the house further. I anticipate the mud room bath as staying, well, muddy. Keeping room- I share your concerns about the 10ft of keeping room space. All it would take is for one kid to leave the bar stool pulled out from the island and it would get tight. The further developed documents (not posted) increase that width to 11.6 which is better, and I am looking at ways to possibly(?) steal a few more inches elsewhere. Apparently this is where the acronym TBWOIF comes in! Dining- This is where I am choosing form over function. I really consider myself a pragmatic person but I have, from day one, requested a three sided dining area. In fact it was a pretty big "driver" in the design process. Yes It will require more steps to dining. I will gladly be willing to pay those steps in order to have windows where I wanted them. We are avid bird/nature watchers and sitting by all those windows watching my bird feeders at suppertime is worth it. Pocket office- Mrs Pete's recent post made me think about this too. It is actually not a work from home office, just a place to pay bills etc. I believe the window will help. The other alternative would be to steal a foot from the master closet. Boy, this whole design process has been one big lesson on "everything is a compromise." ;) KawerKamp! Thanks so much for such a great lifehack! I really am going to keep this in mind in the pantry!

Before you go any further pick up the book What Not to Build. Trust me it will help you. I can say it helped with my build. I'm sorry but this is too complicated. The book I recommended will explain why in more detail. The thing that bothers me the most other than those oversized windows all competing for attention is the feeling that the second floor is going to crush the first floor. It feels taller than the first floor! And second floor windows shouldn't overpower the house by being larger than the first floor windows. There are 4 different materials on the front elevation and 4 different window styles which have no relationship to one another. The garage door wood is vertical yet the wood under the windows is horizontal. Then you have the chimney? sticking up with no relation to anything else. It just cuts the house in half and doesn't even continue up to the second floor. On the left first floor you have stucco above the windows but on the right side the windows continue up to the ceiling. Again nothing cohesive between them. There are too many competing things with too many materials and too many different planes. There is no focal point.