On his 74th birthday, a man got a gift certificate from his wife. It was for a visit to a medicine man living nearby who was rumored to have a wonderful cure for ED. The birthday boy drove to the reservation & presented his certificate..The medicine man handed him a potion. "This is a powerful medicine. Take only a teaspoonful and say '1-2-3'." When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life and you can perform as long as you want." The man asked "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,'" the medicine man responded, "When she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon." The man went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. When she came in, he quickly took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!" Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His excited wife began throwing off her clothes as she asked "What was the 1-2-3 for?" And that, readers, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.

Hi nickel ... (carrying an undiscosed mumber of kilograms?) " ... taking it easy and keeping warm"? For a few years I've kept the thermostat at around 64 - 62, as a contribution to alleviating the global warming/pollution problems and had it about 64 earlier. That causes some more complications regarding visits to the bathroom for EWS (Eliminating Waste Solutions), due to the need for long johns, overshirts, extra sweaters, etc. As one ages, however, and one's other EWS (Early Warning System) deteriorates, one develops an extra sensitivity and adds concentration on rapid adjusting of clothing, in order to compensate for the first EWS' developing a certain sluggishness, to forestall that System producing a Solution not according to one's hopes and expectations. Which would require this aged person's household's version of ALS (Additional Laundry Service). My son came for a visit about 10 days ago to help clear some problems associated with the house for a couple of days, so I turned up the thermostat to about 68 ... and haven't developed as much enthusiasm as needed to turn it back down after he returned home. So I am keeping quite warm, thanks. ole joyful.

Mom had a condo one town over and D was the self appointed mayor and watch person. She tried not to let it bother her when he would walk by her windows with a letter in his hand pretending to need to go to the mailbox. But what floored her was the time she came home and had her arms full of grocery bags so she managed to get the key in the door and the door open and left her key there while she went to the kitchen to unload. She turns around and there is D reminding her that she left her key in the door and that that was not a good idea!! Sheesh!!

When i see this joke i think, yes, but the pencil has the lead.