I'm going to be 84 shortly but does not sound common here yet. I forget some names but they soon pop in again other than that doing just fine.

It sounds like some form of dementia. It is common for people's long term memories to persist well while not being able to form new ones. A doctor can confirm this but I cant imagine would be able to do anything. Sometimes these things are medicine related. Is he on meds? As people age doses might need reducing. That is a reason doctors can miss.

My mom is in a residential facility on the memory care floor. There are 25 residents in memory care and I've seen one or two have conversations with themselves but that's all. When she was on the regular assisted-living floor again maybe one or two but that's all. It may be part of aging I don't know.

My FIL was diagnosed with age related dementia when he was 89. What I first noticed was he would talk to himself, but the scary issue was speaking inappropriately (sexual). Totally opposite of who he was. His primary physician said it's not uncommon and will likely stop as the disease progresses. Thankfully his neurologist put him on a low dose anti-depressant for this issue and it stopped quickly. Prior to the anti-depressant, we did have an incident where my FIL was inappropriate with two women while we were grocery shopping. I was so grateful for their understanding.

My mother developed a degree of dementia, mostly involving short term memory loss. I don't think she ever had conversations with herself, though, and while she needed nursing home care, she never deteriorated to the extent that she didn't know who we were or couldn't have a conversation or read a newspaper.  (She passed away at 99). There just seem to be different levels of dementia, and not much to be done

(Boy, the immediately preceding post is hard to read as it's formatted)

always, whether your father's behavior is common or normal or not normal, it does signal a change in his personality and perhaps also his cognitive ability. Best to get advice from a medical doctor as to what steps are recommended to insure his continued well-being.

An oldster in my family seemed to me to be experiencing a mental decline but my view wasn't held by others. His closest relatives found it amusing and endearing to observe and talk about how his habits and preferences had changed as the years went by. I personally thought there was more wrong but my suggestions to that effect were dismissed because "they knew him better than I did". Not too long later, his wife caught him about to drink from a bottle of drain cleaner he found under the sink - he was "thirsty". That brought home reality - they found him a residential "memory unit" where he could be safe and better looked after. I'm not suggesting that's what your father may need, always, because I neither know him nor am I qualified to say. But the first step should be getting his condition assessed.

Good luck.

There are all kinds of dementia and some of them have causes that can be treated, such as B12 deficiencies and thyroid issues. My mother's neighbor started having mental issues -- she was in her 90s -- turns out it was side effects from all the medications she was on. They cut her back and her mental health improved dramatically. Others are part of diseases associated with aging such as Alzheimer's or arterial sclerosis. It's important he be evaluated by a medical professional, hopefully a gerontologist who specializes in diseases of the aged who can give you a proper diagnosis and treatment.

My dad's memory decline was unmistakable soon after he reached 80. He was okay living independently in his retirement community for another 10 years. During this time his doctor had him on aricept to slow his memory loss, which probably did help. I never heard Dad talk to himself, but for most of these years he was obsessed with an oil painting of a young nude woman. Almost every conversation he'd say: "It's tasteful, her back is turned about three-quarters so you don't see anything; who will want this when I'm gone, I bet I could easily sell it, so many people would want it, etc". (He got this painting from his late brother's estate decades ago but Mom never let him hang it up.) Dad is 93 and in a memory care unit now, hasn't mentioned The Nude or anything "inappropriate" in 2 or 3 years.

Oh the things to look forward to ... I already talk to myself, I wonder what I'll be saying...!

I saw that in my dad too. He had age related dementia.

It's so hard. I had to keep telling myself, over and over, that the person who was before me was not my dad - not really anyway. My dad, for the first 8 decades of his life, would have been appalled at his behavior for the last year or so of his life.

It started out with inappropriate comments, and progressed into delusions.

There is something so bizarre about hearing your own parent's voice saying things that you know are not them. The cognitive dissonance took awhile for me to reconcile. It sounded like him....but it was not him. Not really anyway.

It's a horrible disease, if indeed that it was you are seeing.

My mother has dementia and is currently in memory care. She went through a spell where she was obsessed with her b**bs. She would shake them in front of people, ask people if they enjoyed looking at them, and would tell the aides when they were bathing her that they just wanted to bathe her so they could look at her t***ies. She stuffed a wad of tissue in her blouse one day and told my husband she had created a third b**b just for him. This went on for several months, then it suddenly stopped.

I agree that dementia is a horrible disease.

https://bigthink.com/neuropsych/talking-to-yourself/

Sounds lonely to me. Get him evaluated and hopefully there is a treatment that would help. Sooner is better than later.

Are you suggesting that article applies to a 90-something man who's apparently babbling aloud about nonsense? What are the professional qualifications of its author?

Yes, I have seen it a lot of times in my career in long term health care. I have seen dementia residents talking to a mirror and having conversation with themselves, with tv and just sitting in a chair. Actually, quite common. Experienced in long term care with elderly.

Just a head's up that UTIs can cause dementia symptoms. When my mom suddenly started to have dementia symptoms and bad short term memory loss, we were advised to have her tested for a UTI. It didn't turn out to be the issue in her case, but I'd never heard of it before, so I try to pass it on to others.

I'm slightly off topic, Elmer, but I appreciated juneroses sharing the article on talking to yourself because -- as I said, I talk to myself.

I agree with you and others who've urged always1stepbehind to have her father evaluated by a medical professional. Learn from others who have been there, done that, studied it -- all can help.

If the change seems to be a bit sudden, do have him checked for a UTI. It’s amazing how that can cause a change in behavior. And, it’s amazing how an antibiotic can restore.

When he talks with himself, can you follow his train of thought, and understand him?

Uptown Gal, this has been pointed out to you before, but I don't think you realize how hard it is to read your posts.

When you're typing a post, you never need to hit "enter." Just type, and the words will automatically wrap to the next paragraph. It looks like when you come to the end of a line in the text box that you hit "enter." That causes disjointed sentences and separate lines of text. No matter if you're on a computer, laptop, iPad, your phone, or anything else, you don't need to hit "enter" when you get to the end of the text box.

This is what your posts look like. Compare what yours look like to what everyone else's look like.

Sorry it looks so small. If you click on it, it will enlarge.

Hi Always! Long time no ”see”. I always enjoyed your condo projects! I guess the kiddos are grown now. It seems we go from raising our kids to dealing with elderly parents....that is life.

I agree with above posters to get him checked out by his doctor to rule out health issues. Even in the absence of Alzheimers, dimentia can be common in someone that old, but there can be drugs that can help. Several years before my mom died, I went through a similar situation and her doctor prescribed Haldol and it was VERY effective for a few years......she was like her old self again. I’m sure there are other treatments that might be beneficial that I am not aware of.

Hoping for the best for your situation.

There are a lot of causes of dementia, from brain tumors, frontal lobe, Lewy body, Alzheimers, UTIs, drug reactions, drug interactions and several others. Yes, you need a real medical evaluation.

My mother, age 104, has a type of dementia called garrulity. She talks nonstop for hours on end, to the point where she gets hoarse. She tells long convoluted stories, often having to do with her childhood, although they are not necessarily based on fact.

Her caregivers, who are very experienced in caring for the elderly, say they often see this. Her hospice nurse concurs. Sometimes her stories go around and around in circles. She is not like that all the time. She had a good day today and we were able to have a pretty good conversation. She does take antidepressants, which make a big difference for her.

Her caregivers just tune her out, but i would imagine it would drive you crazy if you lived with the person doing this.

My hairdresser's DM was in memory care for three years before she mercifully became catatonic one day and died shortly thereafter. She had frequent UTIs, and she also became very 'frank' about sex. She was certain that her DH had put her in care because he 'had another woman on the side'. It became too hard for him to visit her and have to listen to her accusations, along with overt sexual advances 'to win him back'.

An advantage of my mulitple myeloma is that I can just stop treatment to put an end to my life when I cease to be me.

The important thing here is, as others have already stated, get you father medically evaluated by a professional ! !

There are many things that could be causing this behavior, and there is help available for many of those things. It's only going to get worse without professional help. Why subject yourselves, and him, to that. There are strides forward being made in the care and treatment of most kinds of dementia, including Alzheimer's Disease. Please, do this for him and for yourselves.

Rusty

Thank you for the replies. We'll have this check out by a doctor. dedtired, you mention your mother and talking for hours to the point of getting hoarse. In addition to the talking I noticed he'll be telling a story and his voice will be really low, quiet. That might be from all the talking.

Our caregivers gave me this tip. If your parents will soon need to have caregivers due to memory loss, start having the caregiver come now. That way, the parents will know them. If you start after they have significant memory loss, the caregiver will be a stranger to them every day, which is upsetting. My friend’s mother would call the police when she found a stranger in the house. Every day!

I agree with doing a urinalysis.

When a patient or family member thinks they need to tell a physician what steps to take to provide information for a diagnosis, it's time to find a new physician.

Correct, Elmer!

My mother had cerebellar dementia - due to 3 tiny strokes. Her initial symptom was confabulation, which we at first thought was just her personality issues worsening.

When she was hospitalized after waking up one day and not recognizing her home in Sylvania as hers ("Yes, it looks just like mine, but it isn't. Take me home!"), based on the history that my sister gave (they had had a falling out), the MD got a psych eval, then based on that was planning to admit her to a psych unit!

They apparently didn't notice, or dismissed, her equally sudden onset of staggering gait and urinary urgency - very obvious as soon as I arrived.

I refused the psych admission, took her home (a hair-raising trip as she kept trying to open the passenger door - thank heavens for child protective locks!) and took her immediately to my hospital ED, where she got an MRI, a neurologist consult, a correct diagnosis. and appropriate treatment.