Gift for New Grandparents?
4 years ago
Featured Answer
Sort by:Oldest
Comments (14)
Related Discussions
Should grandparents be paid for childcare (new)
Comments (3)Yes, you should be paid, I agree with chaplainkent, it is a job. You are not babysitting, you are providing childcare, as you noted in the subject, and childcare is a job worth paying for. Around here, daycare charges are $200 a week, minimum, so they are getting a bargain. Overnight care is rarely available. But, if you framed this to your daughter as a lesson to be learned by them, I can understand why she's upset. You are both behaving very badly. They are adults now, so your attempts to criticize their decisions, no matter how bad they seem to you, are, of course going to insult them, as it would you if they made comments about how you live your life. You may need to back off for a while, while being as pleasant and cheerful as possible, always happy to see them; and start looking for a job. When you have some good prospects, you can frame the conversation around potential jobs and how they are going to adjust, and what it would take to allow you to keep caring for their child/children. Good luck....See MoreGrandparent not fair
Comments (3)You say that your father-in-law 'is not really involved in' your children's lives. Do your children take an interest in their grandfather--I mean, is there at least communication? If not, then don't be too surprised that the grandparent mirrors the disinterest. You say that your 'husband just brushes it off as if he is not surprised by it'. What does that mean? Do you know your father-in-law? Or have you just decided that the FIL is being insensitive. There could be many explanations why the grandfather sent a gift to one child and not to the other. A fourteen year old is old enough to communicate with her grand. Is she encouraged to do that? Sometimes we get so wrapped up with our lives that we don't pay much attention to our grandparents. I know that many grandparents feel that their grandchildren aren't interested in them and their spirits would certainly be lifted by receiving a letter, phone call, or receive some gesture of attention. I don't think that greeting cards are where it's at--no matter what merican greetings would have us think. Sometimes grandparents don't say what they think or feel because they know the younger generation isn't interested. Hmm?...See MorePlease give some advice to new grandparents!
Comments (5)I have wonderful memories of my Grandmother. Unfortunately, I came along fairly late in life and didn't know the others. You know what I remember? The time she spent with me. I use to spend the night with her and we'd play cards for hours. she didn't have much money and lived with her friend in the upstairs of her home. It was a small upstairs and just right for the two of us. I'm getting warm all over just remembering :-) I have a son that hasn't had the benefits of good Grandparenting and I feel bad for him. His step Grandma is so busy volunteering and doing good stuff for others that all the Grandkids seem unimportant. Her and my Dad have never even had him spend the night and he's 18 now. Too old to care. My husbands side was even worse. From the day he was born they made it clear they were never going to babysit and they didn't. They never built a relationship either. I don't know if your retired or still working, but how special it would be to make time for them during summer vacation or other holidays and spend special time with you. I know when our son was little the pool at the hotel was the greatest entertainment, and it didn't have to be fancy. A walk, an ice cream, etc all willl make memories for that child to hold for the rest of their lives, and it will make them both feel real special. Perhaps you could even be a catalist for the relationship between the grandkids if they don't get to see each other much. I don't have years of wisdom to pass on, just some stuff I appreciated and treasure and regret in the life of my son and his cousins. How wonderful that you cared enough to ask on this forum. I bet your going to be wonderful Grandparents!...See MoreTo grandparents who don't want to be grandparents
Comments (3)I, too, am concerned about the dog situation. Perhaps I'm reading things that aren't there, but you said the dog was released from a pen--that sounds like it wasn't truly a 'house pet' kind of animal. Animals who spend a lot of time in pens often aren't as well socialized as those who spend all their time with the family and are much more likely to act aggressively. I'm sorry, but in a case like that, allowing the dog to run free around a 3-year-old when no one was apparently keeping an eye on the situation was a really, REALLY dangerous thing to do--the result was predictable. You also said that they sued your ins. to cover their medical bills and seemed to have a problem with with that--that's what you have insurance for. Why should the parents have footed the bill for damage your dog and your husband's carelessness caused? Your message seems to indicate that the little girl was pretty seriously hurt ('she's healed nicely' and the fact that their suit was apparently successful seem to indicate her wounds were fairly substantial). Actually, a dog bite is one of the easiest ways to get your home-owners cancelled--the companies consider that responsible pet owners have a duty to keep their pets under control, that bites are preventable. You seem to be blaming them for the cancellation--I don't know many young families today who can afford major medical bills, they probably did the only thing they could. You could, of course, prevented the claim, by offering to pay the bills yourself, right? Please consider how you would have felt years ago, if you thought someone caused harm and hurt to one of your children--you sound like you care about your children and would like to care about your gk--I imagine you'd have been pretty upset if someone else hurt one of them. Can you put yourself in the parents shoes and imagine how they might feel? I feel very badly that you're not getting to see your granddaughter as much as you'd like, but I do agree with the above poster. Some counselling would certainly be in order--for all the family--so that you can work out the many issues that your family faces. Good thoughts to you, your husband and the rest of your family. I truly hope you find the help you need to work this all out....See More
4 years ago
Related Stories
FEEL-GOOD HOMESimple Pleasures: Treasuring the Gift of Grandparents
You can enrich your family life by bringing generations together for shared meals, quilting projects, storytelling
Full Story
LIFEThank U 4 the Gr8 Gift: How to Send Thanks in the Digital Age
We click open invitations and RSVP via text, but a handwritten thank-you is sometimes still best. Here's how to tell
Full Story
CHRISTMASGift Giving the Simple-ish Way
If buying holiday gifts drives you to the spiked holiday punch, try these easier but still rewarding traditions
Full Story
LIFEShare Your Vintage Photos of Your Cool Grandparents
Post an old photo of your grandparents at home. You might see it in an upcoming feature on Houzz
Full Story
HOLIDAYS5 Gifts for the Home They'll Love — That Cost Next to Nothing
Print your own gift coupons: Offer your time and skill for presents your loved ones will really use
Full Story
HOLIDAYS13 Holiday Gifts Light on the Planet and Your Wallet
Share succulents, homemade spirits or personalized linens for meaningful, conscientious gifts
Full Story
LIFEThe Polite House: Do I Have to Display Decor Given to Me as a Gift?
Etiquette columnist Lizzie Post tackles the challenge of accepting and displaying home decor gifts from frequent visitors
Full Story
BUDGET DECORATING10 Beautiful, Decorative Gifts to Make on the Cheap
Save money while spreading the love with these personal DIY projects (pssst ... you can even keep them for yourself)
Full Story
ECLECTIC HOMESHouzz Tour: Renovation Gives Toronto Family a Special Gift
Their purchase of a fixer-upper pays off years later with a remodel that tailors the home to their needs
Full Story
HOLIDAYS5 Home Pros Share Their Favorite Holiday Gifts
Checking off your holiday shopping list just got easier, thanks to these home design pros’ stylish go-to present picks
Full Story
User