Living with diabetes and those who live with other medical issues
5 years ago
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Living Will and Medical Power of Attorney
Comments (15)Depending on your situation, this may be a little tricky. The powers you're talking about typically come into play when the person who granted them is "unable or unwilling" to act on their own behalf. (Or some such language.) What that means is that, if your sister is considered legally competent, her instructions will override yours notwithstanding the documents -- if she chooses to assert them. As you may imagine, that is not something you want service-providers to have to sort out on-the-spot. How are they to judge whether or not she's competent? Terrible spot for them to be in. In many situations, this works very well. Between myself and the person for whom I hold such powers, it's perfect. This person conducts all their own affairs at all times. However, I pay the bills, write the checks, etc., and their bank and doctors know my directives can be relied upon if they're confused or unclear in their presentation. (That has happened countless times.) What my charge can do, they do. What they choose not to, I do on their behalf. However, they're still competent. Their competent instructions trump my "powers" if push comes to shove. I don't know if its possible for a competent person to simply grant such irrevocable powers to another without legal guardianship being appointed. However, that does sound like a simple question that any lawyer would answer quickly and for free. If so, that would be the way to have the documents executed. From what you have said, it seems to me you should have guardianship -- which will make you responsible at all times and the documents enforceable at all times -- regardless of what your sister may assert. Guardianships are granted by courts. They're a nuisance, but otherwise pretty easy assuming no objection from your sister. If your sister does object, then you're talking about competency hearings which can become very troublesome....See MoreHelp for those who live with pack rats
Comments (28)Well... "it is hard to move an old tree"... is the problem. Long time habits are hard to change and there must be a "logical" reason presented to get rid of stuff. The fact that the house, garage or yard is overflowing... is often not a good reason in the mind of the collector. Looking at all this stuff is hard on the mate too. I know several gals that sneak stuff out to the trash when hubby is not looking. Everyone needs to move every 10 years and that would solve most of the clutter problems. Ha! Some things to help... Buy a shed. Put in garage shelves going up to the ceiling on one side of the garage. I have an old torn out kitchen (cabinets, counter tops and sink etc.) installed in my garage to keep things out of sight. One garage wall is shared by the laundry room so it was easy to have a plumber hook up the sink in the garage. I have done this is every home I live in... find someone tearing out their kitchen and put the cabinets with counter tops in my garage. Some of these cabinets can also be used in a shed too. I have years of memories in my home carried around from a couple of moves. My closets and shelves are over flowing from things I think I have to keep for one reason or another. There are stories that go with the items... but it is basically clutter to everyone else. Then I learned ebay. I still have a lot of things to purge but it is a way for me to live with less clutter in my life. A good way to do some purging is to learn ebay and craigslist. I know a couple of ladies that was able to clear out some areas of their home. They got their husband excited by watching an item sell. Ebay is not what it use to be but there are still buyers looking for treasures no matter the state of the economy. Another friend has a mom with a house full of memories... and due to age and health, it was obvious that the home would need to be sold in the near future. Mom probably paid 50 cents for an old sewing item years ago. Yet this same item sold for much more on ebay as a collectible. Her mom knew what she paid for most of these items, so the price from ebay was always more in the eyes of the mom. It took a while but my friend was able to sell off many unused items... things collecting from over the years. She started out by selling some of her own things and would then tell her mom how much $$ she made on ebay to go into her vacation fund. It was a soft sell to mom and it worked in small steps. Then mom eventually got excited and was actually looking in her shelves and closets for things to sell. Mom enjoyed going shopping with the money and buying presents for her grandchildren. While the family members did not want the stuff collecting in mom's home, the ebay sales was all converted to cash and mom enjoyed giving the proceeds away in the form of gifts to family members. I introduced selling on ebay into my own life and am having fun doing it. It seems easier to part with things if I can get money for it. I am getting older and what happens to my stuff... since no one in the family wants most of it? I started out with books to gain feedback and experience with selling. You need an acceptable reason to get rid of saleable clutter in the eyes of the doer and ebay works for me. I always have a "donation box" in the garage and add to my trash bin if the item cannot be used as a dust or polishing cloth. Ha!...See MoreInsight Needed-Stepdaughter Now Living With Biofather Issues
Comments (9)Hello hamsteve I'm new at this forum, but I just read what you submitted on April 18th about your stepdaughter. The situation that my husband and I are currently going through is very similar to yours. I met my husband when my son was 4 years old.. He and I have raised him with very little help financially from his biodad. His biodad was ordered to pay $30.00 per week when my son was born based on the salary he was making at the time. His support has never been increased and so my husband and I have carried the brunt of it all.. my husband has also carried our son on his medical plan through work his entire life thus far. My husband and I decided from the beginning that we thought it would be best for me to be a stay at home mom and so actually my husband has been our sole provider, fulfilling my son's every need... financially, emotionally, etc. etc. Since I did stay home, I sacrificed a lot for my son by not being in the work force and so on ,and besides that, my whole life became my son. I have allowed my son to have a relationship with his biodad because I felt it was best for him, and so I would send him to visit on an every other weekend basis and even the last few years since my son became older, I've allowed him to go on summer vacations with his biodad and family. My son's biodad has since married and has three children with his wife-- two biological and one adopted. They've been living on (from what I here) a $120,000 income for quite some time and live a nice lifestyle. Also, my son's biodad has recently discovered that he also has a 23 yr old son that he didn't know existed. They've used this young man to lure our son because they know that he has no siblings in our home. So yes, he is also our only child. We've been unable to conceive and have a child together. So this makes this whole thing doubly hard. Anyway, to make a long story short, our son has decided to move out of our home and to move in with his biodad and stepmother and siblings there in Kentucky. We live about 2 hours away in Ohio. We are very hurt and feel betrayed almost. Really, we're devastated. We feel we were very good parents and we don't understand his reasoning for this decision, especially based on his biodad's track record. Our relationship with our son's biodad and stepmom has been very distant, but civil when necessary up until our son turned about 14. We found out that they were telling him that he was old enough to make a decision to move in with them and that their home was open to him if he decided to. This went on all during our son's high school years. Then, as our son became closer to turning 18 and becoming an adult, their "manipulations" became a lot worse. Just last Christmas, our son's stepmom began emailing him and saying very negative things about me and saying things to him to try to undermine my role as his mother, such as "when I was 16, I didn't have to answer to my parents and I could make my own decisions. You need to start making your own decisions without consulting your mom about everything." Every email was written to cut me up and down. They began ridiculing and poking fun at our parental choices involving him. It just became very difficult and painful. I almost feel like they've brainwashed our son. I can only hope that this is a phase or part of growing up that your stepdaughter and my son have to experience and that everything will work out in time. I feel your pain and I want you to know that you and your wife aren't alone. We'll be praying for you as I hope you'll pray for us. You can read my full story..it's under hurtinmom38....See MoreFor those living w polished (nickel or chrome) hardware
Comments (40)I have lived in the same house for 39 years and have done three remodels. There is no doubt in my mind that chrome is the way to go. I have one set of fixtures which have been here for 25 years and they are beautiful. As for Rohl, plumbing supply people say there is no better and I put in one set in my main bathroom (I have six) and love it but don't use glass cleaner on it. Supply stores have a specific product and you don't even need that if you just quickly wipe up after using, one swipe with a microfiber cloth I keep under the sink. I am not a fanatic, it takes ten seconds and it doesn't matter if you miss a couple of times but you will never be sorry. However, now companies like California Faucets and Newport Brass make the Rohl classic styles in polished chrome and the price is about 40% less and you have both beauty and excellent function. In the long run, after I have obsessed over the exact choices every time, I like everything I have now because they are good, fairly expensive but not Rohl top of the like (or Watermark) and polished chrome and they last....See More- 5 years ago
- 5 years ago
- 5 years agolast modified: 5 years ago
- 5 years ago
- 5 years agolast modified: 5 years ago
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lucillleOriginal Author