Thanks for the replies so far. The window sill would be replaced if we go with the wider casing and may need to be replaced if we go with the narrow too. The padding out would put an inch piece of wood on all sides of the insides of the window (but not cover the glass), basically giving a wider surface onto which to attach the casing. There is just enough room for the 2 1/4 inch trim to fit and clear the corner of the crown. We mounted the crown so the top of the it would line up with the top of the casing. Here is another angle of the other kitchen. To me it looks like they took the wide casing all the way up to the ceiling and that the top of the crown covers a little corner of it. [Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by San Antonio Kitchen & Bath Designers BRADSHAW DESIGNS LLC

If all the windows are stained, and all the trim is painted, I think you are fine. As long as it follows a pattern, that is ok. There was another thread earlier about doors and paint vs stain and I think the conclusion was the same. If all the bedroom doors are one finish and the closets another, it is ok to mix. Just come up with a plan, follow it and you will be ok. There is no "one size fits all" here. Personally, I think stained trim can be lovely, but sometimes it can also be overload. I think having some stained and some painted may be the best of both worlds.

I admit, I'm a little confused as to whether or not you're painting or staining. Staining, I think...? I'd think that now isn't the time to cheap out. "Oh, said the guest/picky MIL, "That would be so beautiful if only that orangey trim actually matched the cabinets." or "How trendy of you." "OH," asked the mean neighbor, "Why you spent all that money on trim and your builder didn't even match your cabinets. Well, certainly is a good thing you like that 'eclectic' look. Honey."

I am working on a home now with 10' ceilings. We are using a 3 piece crown made up of a 4" decorative crown at the top, a 2" flat center piece and a 2" decorative molding at the bottom. If you search for '3 piece crown moldings' you'll see a lot of images like this below, and should get a sense of scale.